Chapter 6:
Broken
"Aoba." A sudden, familiar voice awakes me from my unconscious state.
"Hm?" Unable to open my eyes, I attempt to work out who is connected to this familiar voice but to no avail and instead, I simply fall back into darkness.
"Aoba." Again, another call repeats through my ears, followed by the sensation of tapping on my chest.
"If you don't wake up, you'll be late."
Hm? Late for what?
A few minutes pass and as the grogginess fades, his words get clearer causing me to instantly open my eyes.
"Shit!" I yell, pulling myself from the now dented sofa; easily noticeable as to where I was sleeping, "Ren, thank you very much!" I continue, patting his little, furry head and running off in the direction of the kitchen.
Damn, I have to make his dinner fast, I don't have much time. He never asked me to do this but I want too. If he's working every day, I also want to be useful; I've never skipped a day before and I don't plan to right now.
As I continue rushing through the slicing and peeling, I begin to feel guilty; the sick feeling returning in my stomach.
Relax…
Relax…
The voice in my head continually repeats those words as I exhale deeply trying to calm myself but my body continues to disobey. Anxiousness, hopelessness, distress; all these emotions grabbing hold of my insides and squeezing, no matter how much I wanted to be set free from these sensations, their grip was just too tight.
I begin to sweat; my body feeling like a scorching oven as I proceed to turn off the stove and collect the boiling pot of pasta in my palms.
He's going to hate it.
I rushed it too much.
What is he going to eat?
I want to hide. I want to hide. I want to hide. I want to hide.
Mink… I want you. Mink, come home….
My messy thoughts swirled ferociously around; the tears bursting out from my eyes triggering my hands to tense up and tremble nervously.
Crash!
"Ah!"
The sizzling pot suddenly slips from my fingertips, plunging to the wooden flooring below; the contents scattered like shards of glass below.
Oh no…
Instantly leaning down to clean up, I grab at the fallen pot without thinking.
"Ow!" A sudden pain pulses through my nerves, the sensation ripping at my skin; I glance down at my hands and notice bright crimson outlines searing through my palms.
"Aoba!"
"No, Ren! Don't come here, you'll get hurt too. I'll be fine, don't worry." Instantly replying to his voice, I stare directly at the concerned puppy in the hallway; wincing from the burns that unfortunately penetrated my skin.
As I glared at the mess in front of me for a few moments, I slide down to the ground; my hands quivering in despair. This is it, this the moment where it felt like I was utterly pushed all the way to the edge. The emptiness within me began to feel even more lifeless and lonely; the sorrow looming over me, I broke down. There was nothing I could do; the tears began to stream down my face as I sat in disbelief.
"Why… Why am I so useless?" I choked, my cheeks wet with tears, "I just wanted to make you… happy."
Bang!
All of a sudden, the door is shoved open from the other end and a large figure appears in the frame; as my eyes come into focus I gaze up at him, I'm locked closely on his concerned expression.
What are you…?
The sudden interruption causes my tears to cease and leave me staring silently at man standing in the doorway; the man who I cried for, the man who I couldn't get out of my head.
Mink.