Hi all, i know you're all a little angry with me for not uploading but i did go on holiday for a while and didnt have access to a computer! I also have a lot of work as well to do so that kinda fills up my time! I am really happy you all like this story as much as you do!

LOOK HERE: This chapter has NOT been proof read (properly), my editor has only been able to edit half of this chapter and I did the other half, not nearly as good as her editing but there we go, so please excuse me for any typo's or bad grammar.

I do not own bleach

Warnings: Violence, language, lemons, lime, distress etc.

Chapter 4

Time Apart

Rukia wandered around the grand house aimlessly, feeling the different materials of the upholstery out of sheer boredom. She glided outside in a swift movement so that she could dip her fingers in the chilled water in the non operational water fountain. She of course had argued the previous summer that the fountain would still be wanted during the winter, whereas Nii-sama had retaliated in his aloof ways, using only an icy stare to make the decision that the fountain was to be turned off during winter, end of.

Rukia allowed herself a small smile, her first one in days; it made her cheeks sore just thinking about smiling. How easy it was then, all that time ago, when there was no tension between the 'siblings,' no whispered promises of love and passion and no confusing situations which left Rukia both breathless and clueless. But now, he was gone and she felt like a lost puppy, unable to do anything and feeling totally helpless, she needed her fix, pronto.

Rukia sighed long and heavy as she walked back inside the warm house, it was starting to get dark, the sun drawing an end to the third day of Nii-sama's absence. She cringed at the name, suddenly remembering how she had been commanded not to call him that, she blushed harder, he would punish her if she did not comply with his departing demands, then again, what kind of punishment was it anyway? She was willing to find out. She passed the familiar rooms, exhausted but restless. Her fingers brushed the brass doorknobs of the rooms she passed, only stopping when she missed one.

She turned abruptly, frowning at the loss of the metal beneath her fingers. She walked slowly to the door with no handle, her eyes widened and she felt a rush of longing and melancholy, it was the supply closet. She hesitantly side stepped past the open door, and into the room, expecting the onslaught of memories. She gasped and fought back the sensation of loss as she spotted the sellotape that she had dropped on that night; it was still on the floor, a light sprinkling of dust coating it. The room was the same as when they had left it, the door was still open, the things on the shelf were still out of place from when she was pinned to the wall and she had knocked the shelf lightly, shuffling the supplies from their original stance. The box was still out of place from when he had kicked it out of his way out with her.

She felt like she was going to drop to her knees, as the strong sensation overwhelmed her and she fought back the threatening tears. She hurriedly tore herself from the room and the memories before staring out into the hall and retracing the path they took. She wandered the trail like an investigator on a murder crime, while picturing it all in her head. Upon reaching place where Byakuya had to drop her she sighed and looked up, only to scowl. His bedroom was so close, only a little further and they would have made it, that fucking bell. She smiled to herself again at her thoughts; it was that very bell that had prevented that action.

She meandered to stand outside his room, toying with herself whether to go in or not, on one hand, it was an invasion of privacy, on the other he hadn't thought twice about invading her privacy, big time. She reached out slowly and felt the cool metal beneath her fingers; she could almost smell his zesty smell from outside. God she needed that smell again, however she felt that is she were to go in and smell it, she was convinced she would pass out. She savoured the relief of the cold metal for several minutes, while she debated with herself. Eventually deciding against it, exhaustion took effect immediately, she had had a long day. Not only did she have trouble at the office as it were, Ukitake had 'pulled a sickey' as it were, not that she could blame him, having an illness as severe as his must be a kick in the teeth. She hated when he was off, the paperwork was colossal, and the new members required Kiyone and Sentaro's training, leaving her to run errands and what not. However, she put it all aside and put up with it as she loved having Ukitake for a captain, when he isn't as ill, he is caring and selfless. He provided her with support and advice. She had may a time wanted to spill the beans to him about herself and her brother, but she even feared what he would think, it is forbidden after all, not only as 'incest' but by the Kuchiki clan and by the rest of the soul society.

She sighed and trudged away, feeling heavy on her feet and incredibly bored. At least he was with her in her dreams. Passing her room, she made for the living room, only to flop into his cosy chair by the fire, which she had taken to sleeping in lately. She buried her face into the fabric and let her feet dangle over the arm rest, warming up by the blazing fire. Rukia inhaled deeply, taking in that scent, a trip, and a nice one. He is like a drug, her drug. She curled up, trying to keep warm, she felt pathetic. Here she was moping around because her 'brother' or so she called him, had left and wasn't returning for two weeks, four days and counting. She was craving his presence 24/7 and she hated herself for it. She hated how much she depended on him, hated what she had become because of him, she had even told herself she hated him, but she knew that was a lie, on the contrary she knew she loved him, which is why she was in this predicament.

Rukia jumped a little as the ancient clock chimed its proverbial tune from deep within the hallway outside. She yawned; it was late, midnight even. Two weeks, three days. She made a mental note in her head to cross the previous day off on her calendar, one thing to look forward to in the morning. She curled tighter as the fire waned and the small embers licked at the last piece of wood, before it snuffed out completely, just in time to see Rukia fall into a deep slumber.

xxxxxxx

Light poured into large room the following morning, making Rukia twitch and squirm around the chair. She clenched her hand subconsciously and inhaled deeply before her eyes flickered open just in time for her to sit bolt upright and survey her surroundings. She placed her shaky hand over her thumping heart as she exhaled slowly. It was only a dream, she reassured herself. She held her hand up to block the light as she turned to slide off the chair, not wanting to leave its solace.

Her heart was still erratic when she walked back to her own room. She looked at her un-slept-in bed, it looked cold and uninviting. She quickly threw her clothes onto it as she became aware of the time. She changed quickly and headed out, not caring to notice one major problem.

She dragged her feet all the way to the barracks, shattered and on edge. Kaien had infiltrated her dreams again last night; she reckoned it was to do with Nii-sama's absence. Mind you, everything has to do with his absence, she thought wistfully. It was true, her sense of security was missing, no one to protect her from her inner turmoil, that never failed to erase from her memories. She lightly kicked a nearby stone; neither having the energy nor the will to kick it harder so that it would travel far.

She continued to look down, resting her chin on her chest while she concentrating on her breathing, anything to get her mind off him. She opened her eyes quickly, smelling a familiar and yet unwanted scent that was usually very much wanted. It was his scent, potent on her skin and as sticky as fly paper, it clung to her. She blushed, feeling the blood rise to her cheeks as she panicked.

"Shit," she cursed, her voice a trembling whisper.

She smelt like her brother, oh kami, it's the apocalypse. Someone is bound to swish past her and catch the scent, she fretted. She cursed herself for over sleeping, she should have showered or something, that was the reason she did partly sleep in, she had bathed the previous night, not needed to get up so early to have one in the morning. But she really hadn't banked on smelling like him. She had no perfume or deodorant to cover it up, and she was already too late to go back home.

She pondered for a few seconds, producing story and story for the reason, cleaning out his room? Maids didn't do the laundry so her clothes stayed under his for too long and the scent never washed out? A little far fetched but it was something, one had to work. Her thoughts wandered however, is this what she would smell like after a night with him? She hoped so; it would be the only time that she would want to smell like him anyway. She sort of wished that that were the explanation this time around. She sighed before snapping out of her thoughts as the bell signalled nine; she was later than she thought.

xxxxxxx

"What's wrong Rukia? You've been acting awfully depressed lately and you haven't been yourself for ages!" Kiyone asked sympathetically as she walked Rukia to the office building within the complex system of the squad thirteen barracks.

"Oh no," Rukia lied, even though she wasn't fooling anyone, "I'm fine."

"Well if you're going to lie at least come up with something better than that!" Kiyone pointed out in a harsh tone. She soon regretted it though as Rukia just stared at the ground harder and sunk lower into her depression.

"I'm sorry," Kiyone apologized suddenly, "I'm just concerned, but I know a way to cheer you up!"

"Huh?" Rukia muttered as she looked up, her eyes large, watery gems.

"Well, we could have girls' night in but I guess your brother would object to all the girls running around the house…then again, maybe not…" Kiyone winked at Rukia, who in turn forced a laugh. Her legs turned to jelly and her face a chalky colour, don't have a breakdown, don't have a breakdown, she pleaded with herself. Oh Kami, she felt like she was going to collapse at the sound of him.

"I um," she managed to say, her voice shaky, "I um, I'm not really sure that h-he would let the house, er, be used like that, even though h-he isn't home…"

"Even more reason to sleep over now!" Kiyone exclaimed.

"I guess," she said hesitantly, not overly impressed by the offer, really she only wanted to go home and sleep in his chair again, "But I'm way too tired to have a sleepover!"

"Fine," Kiyone huffed, "I suggest a big tub of ice cream, some chick flicks and a buddy."

"Hm," Rukia pondered, "That doesn't sound half bad, that might help, thanks Kiyone."

"Its ok," she replied happily, "I also have some magazines and manga books for you to read, they're really funny and sweet at the same time."

"Yeah that would be good, bed time reading I suppose."

"Uh huh," she smiled, "I'll see you later, Sentaro and I have some lectures to do, new recruits and all, I'll leave the stuff on your desk, 'kay?"

Rukia barely had chance to say thanks before Kiyone zipped off in a heartbeat. Rukia allowed herself a rare smile, maybe she would enjoy the change in routine, and it would give her something to do, rather than pine after Nii-sama constantly. She wondered whom she could ask, well Rangiku was fully booked up with Izuru, the pair have been going out now for some time, Nanao was running around after her captain, only a matter of time before they got together, Momo was in Rukongai, visiting her and captain Hitsugaya's grandmother, Nemu was with her father and Rukia was far too afraid to venture into that frightening place, Yoruichi had run off somewhere…she sighed. She was much to tired to visit Ichigo or Renji either. Come to think of it, why did Kiyone suggest a sleepover when half the girls are missing? She shook her head, perhaps solitude would help, it was me, myself and I, she thought.

Upon reaching the office building, she rushed through work before picking up her stuff and signing out early for the day, she had some stuff to buy and films to rent. As she walked out, she placed her chin on her neck and inhaled again, still the same scent, she closed her eyes on the exhale, feeling that bit closer to him already.

xxxxxxx

The ice cream store was lined with brightly coloured tubs of the frozen treat. Chocolate, Strawberry, Vanilla- the classics, Bubblegum, Butterscotch, Toffee, Mint, Cookie Dough, Cherry, Raspberry Ripple and some she hadn't even heard of or even imagined could exist. She repeatedly lifted her hands to grab one, but each time dropped her hands to her side, and shook her head unable to choose one. She paced around the vast store again; it was a good time waster but the boorish clerk shot her warning glances every two minutes in the hopes to nudge her out of the shop so that he could continue watching his soap opera.

Taking the hint, Rukia flitted over to the previous section, adjacent to the topping station where packets of gummy candy hung from neat hooks, tempting and inviting. She removed a large tub of Cookie Dough ice cream from the freezer and scooped up her various candy pieces before purchasing her spoils and making a hasty retreat.

The trip to the movie rental store wasn't successful either, for one it was packed and two, Rukia had never seen a chick flick in her life and ended up in a completely wrong section. She asked for help and sighed in relief as a young girl steered her in the right direction. She looked down in embarrassment and thanked the girl quietly as she walked away. She kept her head low, she only had to go and miss the colossal sign that sectioned the chick flick area. She browsed the shelves, casting her eyes over the Japanese soap operas, western movies and animated movies with pretty girls on the covers. She furrowed her eyebrows several times; unsure which film was the safest bet. She pulled out several cases and read the back synopsis before returning them, unsatisfied with their storyline. After twenty minutes, the store had cleared somewhat and she had successfully chosen the first season of a soap opera, Crystal Secrets.

xxxxxxx

Rukia gasped loudly, the spoon in her hand dropped into the half empty ice cream bucked on her lap with a clatter. She held her breath as she stared at the television, the images flickering in front of her making the light levels fluctuate.

"Shhhh, its ok Haruhi, I'm here for you."

"But," the brunette girl whimpered, "What will they say? We could get…k-killed for this…Akito…"

"I would never allow that," Akito soothed as he stroked her hair, "We have to do it now…while we have the chance… we'll tell Asuna, she will help…"

Haruhi broke down in tears at this point, making Rukia grip the edge of her seat, oh, kami, kami, Haruhi has to get help, she thought. Rukia took her now melting ice cream and tore her eyes away from the screen so that she could find the remote and pause it. She stood up abruptly and rushed to the freezer, replacing the sticky treat and returning the candy to the fridge. Flash stepping back to the couch; she threw herself onto it, barely making a noise with her light weight, before pressing play to watch her gripping program.

"Akito…what are you do-" Haruhi started to say.

Rukia gasped and clutched the couch as she watched Akito crush his mouth against Haruhi's. Damn, she thought, this is what I wanted to avoid, a reminder of what I am missing myself. She scowled, but was too intrigued to stop watching now.

"I need you, Haruhi, not want, need…"

"Akito…I love you…"

Rukia gasped and held her hand over her mouth as Akito placed Haruhi on his bed and lingered over her. Rukia stared wide eyed at the screen not wanting to miss a second. A little obsessive, but at least it was taking her mind off the loneliness.

xxxxxxx

To polish off a good evening, after watching four hours worth of Crystal Secrets, Rukia settled down in her bed, a change for once, though it didn't feel the same as sleeping in his chair. She rubbed the back of her neck, massaging the crick she was starting to get in it. She snuggled down, feeling refreshed from her bath and warm from her snugly quilt. She flicked through the magazines, reading articles of real life stories from the rukon district, often told by teenagers, who she couldn't help but sympathise with, she know far too well what Rukongai is like. She read her horoscope, nothing to write home about, just the usual, meet an old friend, run into a bit of money, and look out for 'him'. She smiled dryly, she knew who 'he' was and yes, she was looking out for him.

She then turned to the manga books Kiyone had lent her and flicked through the drawings, stopping now and then to catch snippets of dialogue. She yawned as she read the volume with slight interest, an interesting story, she admitted.

It had not been ten minutes before Rukia had drifted into a light and uneasy sleep, leaving the light on, book in her hand, on the page where she had been reading.

xxxxxxx

"Half way there," Rukia sighed as she checked her calendar. It had been one week since her night in and it had been the same as the first week, slow. Painfully so. During this time, she had rented the rest of the soap opera, relished its scandalous ending and had moved on to various others like it. She had grown fond of her nights in as it took up most of her time and provided some decent distraction. She grabbed her things on the way out, walking hastily as she was late again- a habit she had gotten herself into.

She stepped into the crisp spring air, the sakura blossoms were in bloom, lighting up the Kuchiki front gardens. She looked down, away from them, they were his trees.

After ten minutes of walking she stopped to look around the crowded streets, searching for her friends whom she was to meet to go shopping with after a substantial amount of coaxing from Rangiku, that is. She stood on her tiptoes and scowled, if only she was a little taller. She continued to look around until she heard her name being called by a familiar friend. She smiled a little and waved as she caught sight of Rangiku, Yoruichi, Momo, Nanao and Nemu. Rangiku beckoned her over excitedly and greeted her when she met them by the shopping mall.

"Rukia!" Yoruichi exclaimed, "I haven't seen you in ages! Where have you been for the last five weeks?"

"Oh," Rukia forced a small laugh, "Well since N-Nii-sama left to go on his mission, I have been staying indoors lately. You know, to take care of the house and stuff and before he went away I was tired a lot so I stayed in…so guess I haven't had a chance to go out really…"

"Oh yeah," Nanao remembered, "Captain Kuchiki is in the living world isn't he, when does he return?"

"A week and a half," Rukia said quickly without thinking, making her immediately blush.

"Uh…huh," Rangiku slowly replied.

"It must be sibling love," Momo piped up, "Like me and lil' Shiro."

Rukia went rigid and the colour drained from her face, sibling love? Had they figured her out? How? Wait, back up, "Like me and lil' Shiro…" well what was Momo and captain Hitsugaya's relationship? She shook her head and watched as Momo blushed at captain Hitsugaya's name.

"Are you ok, Rukia?" Nemu asked quietly.

"Yeah, are you sick? You look awfully pale," Nanao interjected.

"Yeah I'm fine," Rukia lied, "Just tired."

"Yeah you look a little tired," Rangiku admitted.

Rukia just shrugged as they began to walk into the mall, pushing past the revolving doors and hitting the instant warm air that heated Rukia's cold body, returning some of her colour with it.

"So you and your brother have a good relationship, right?" Yoruichi asked.

"Yeah," Rukia said casually, "You could say that."

"Well that's good," Momo smiled as she picked up a dress from the rack before examining it, "At least you get on well."

"More than you could ever imagine," Rukia muttered under her breath.

"Ne," Rangiku said as she pulled out a tiny skirt, "Do you think Izuru would like this?"

She held it against her hips and jiggled it from side to side while laughing. Rukia smiled but was shocked that such tiny skirts weren't criminal.

"I bet it would look good on Momo," Yoruichi grinned with a cheeky twinkle in her eyes, "Just imagine what little Hitsugaya would think if you walked into his office wearing this little number."

"I can imagine what my captain would say," Nanao murmured wryly, "The pervert."

Rukia looked down, embarrassed, what would Nii-sama say? Would he like that sort of thing?

"What about you, Rukia?" Nemu asked as she eyed up the camisoles before she flicked through them, "Do you have a boyfriend or anyone whom you like?"

"No," Rukia said quickly and rather loudly as she looked up rapidly and blushed as all eyes were upon her, "No, I don't like anyone."

The girls stared at her for a few seconds, utterly confused at her forceful answer, there was something going on here.

"Um, Rukia, honey," Rangiku asked gently, "Is there something you want to tell us?"

"No," Rukia said carefully, even though her heart was pounding and nervousness percolated through her.

"Are you sure?" Nanao coaxed, "Because you've been acting kind of jumpy lately and I heard that comment about your brother, is everything all right your household?"

"Yes everything is fine, I'm just a little irritable because I'm tired," Rukia assured her with a forced smile.

Rangiku frowned as she watched Rukia pass this off as nothing, for now she would let it slide but something was definitely up and she wanted to know what.

Yoruichi, looking from Rukia to Rangiku and back again saw the immediate questioning of Rangiku in her facial expression and the embarrassment of Rukia in her blushing face. "Ok, let's go and get some crêpes from the food hall, they look really good on the poster add!"

The girls nodded in agreement and made their purchases, Momo buying a halter top, Rangiku buying 'the' skirt and Nanao buying a t-shirt. Rukia sighed in relief at the sudden change in topics and activities. She looked over to Yoruichi who was already watching her. Rukia smiled at her, thanking her for the kind act but soon felt her heart stop as Yoruichi winked at her and grinned her usually cheeky grin.

She was going to have to be more careful, at all costs.

xxxxxxx

It was safe to say the shopping trip was successful; she had managed to catch up gossip with her friends, kill another day as the time apart from 'him' was killing her, and her secret was safe – for now anyway.

The next week and a half dragged just as slowly as the previous ones, slowly but with each passing day, she looked forward more and more to crossing each day off her calendar as it came and becoming more excitable each day. However, one thing that the girls had said later that day when they went shopping stuck in her mind and sent it reeling. Has your brother got a girlfriend? She had answered no at the time, keeping it under wraps, not that she could call herself that or could she? Well maybe he will find a girl in the living world, Nemu had said, I've heard about it before.

"A girl in the living world, huh?" Rukia said lightly to herself, reminding herself of the conversation. She stared up at the ceiling as she lay in bed, running it back over and over, any more and she would have acute paranoia. Only five days to go, but surely things couldn't have changed since then, right?

Please review! Thank you all who did review, it makes me happy! I feel sorry for Rukia she has been so lost without him, lets hope he comes home soon!

lovesanime92: Thanks for the review! I know it was mean to send him on a mission!

ByaRukifan: Glad you are enjoying it! Hehe, yeah they finally kissed.

: Thank you, glad to be in your good books, yep, join the byaruki army!

Byakushi!: Thanks, im happy you love it, lol, the bell, everyone hates it!

Bluementrit: Yay, glad you think its sweet and pleased you love it, again, damn bell!

Silver Ice Dragon Princess: Hehe, dont worry more lime and stuff coming up! Bell, hehe, but he will be home sooner than you think!

Jolene : Wow, that is a lot of times, thank you! Sorry to keep you waiting so long! Yes, he is damn cheeky, but she loves it really!

Secret Starr: I know, i'm bad for not updating sooner! Thanks for the review!

realityfling18: Wow, you reviewed sooo many times! yay, im so happy, thank you! Yes don't worry there is more forbidden love on the way, much more :p, hehe that bell again, everybody is so hacked off with it!

In the next chapter, yes, someone returns home, and Rukia is swept away like never before! Next time: A Steamy Situation! (Warning way in advance, read next chap at ur own will, it is M for a reason!"