Oh my God! This chapter was really hard to write for some reason and my beta has been battleing the evil forces known as Senior Project. I want to say to you guys one little thing... YOU PEOPLE FREAKING ROCK! I 3 you guys for all the reviews and favoriting and subscribing. It really makes me happy to know that someone other than my beta is reading this. Thanks for helping me get this far! Without further dely, here is the chapter!
Saving Axel
Chapter 17: Moving On
Roxas's POV
The world was cruel.
The universe hates me.
Nothing could possibly be worse than this.
"Mr. Leonhart? Please answer the question," said the doctor. I wanted to punch him for the way he was acting so coldly to Leon. He looked like he was about to break at any moment, and this man was literally demanding answers now about the wife he just lost only a few hours ago!
Sora was using me to cry on. I couldn't move him, because this was one of those times where he can't be left alone. My phone vibrated, but I ignored it only for it to vibrate again. Someone was calling me. I removed one arm from around Sora's back and moved it to my jean pocket. I pulled my cell phone out and looked at the caller ID and sighed: Axel. This was the third time he has called within the hour. I hit the ignore button again and put it back into my pocket. I turned back to see Sora wiping his eye and looking to me until a new batch of tears formed. I turned to him fully, and he latched himself onto me like a leech. I gently rubbed his back, but said nothing.
What could I say?
I haven't said anything in three hours, just being Sora's shoulder to cry on while Leon dealt with the specifics. I guess I'm just handling things like I always have since my parents dumped me off in the God forsaken town that I now hate.
I'm keeping it in, and appearing normal. I'm good at it. In my experience, only two people could ever see right through my façade… and one of them just died. The other is Axel, and he's probably already a worried mess. He brought me to the hospital after I got the call; neither of us spoke, and dropped me off at the door. He tried to follow me in, but I just wouldn't let him. I literally pushed him away and walked in alone. I know it hurt him, but I wanted to get there alone. Once I got to the room, Sora spotted me first and attached himself onto my shoulder, even though he was the older one.
Thank God we're the same height.
Now my mind's just wandering so it doesn't think about the tasks ahead.
Such a task is dealing with all those over-caring people whom barely even know you or the deceased person: teachers, other students, close friends, and worst of all…
Axel.
"Sor," Leon began, running a comforting hand on his son's back, "Rox." He sighed and kneaded his forehead until he placed a hand on my shoulder. He was trying to be strong when he was about to break. I knew that because he used the nicknames Yuffie had given us. I looked up to him and saw his eyes watering slightly, and Leon never cried.
"Leon?" He glanced down to me, "Why don't you call Rinoa and invite her over for the night?" I asked, and he paused before slowly nodding. Rinoa was a close friend of Yuffie and Leon's. She was one of the few people out there that could bring a smile to his face, Sora on occasion, and until recently, Yuffie too. I turned to Sora and moved a hand to his chin and tilted it up.
"Why don't you call Riku to spend the night?" He looked hesitant until Leon nodded approval to that, and Sora nodded as well. I stood up, taking Sora with me. He grabbed my hand and leaned on me heavily as we made our way out the door toward the car Leon drove tonight since his car was being repaired.
Yuffie's car.
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Axel's POV
I passed the table where my phone was again and sighed angrily as I ran both hands through my fiery red mane of hair. That was the fourth time Roxas ignored my call! Doesn't he understand I want to know if he needs me? I know what it's like to go through a loss alone, and it isn't very fun. I mean, look how I turned out!
I'll be damned if I let the same thing happen to Roxas!
But he needs to pick up the damn phone first!
"Axel?" I looked toward my door right as it opened. I stood awkwardly as Snow walked into my room with some hot chocolate in my favorite mug. I probably looked pretty stupid since I wasn't wearing a shirt, and I looked super pissed off with my hands pulling on my spikes. She smiled lightly. Her brown hair was pulled into a pony tail of soft curls, and she was dressed in jeans and a plain white t-shirt. She didn't do casual well, because she tries too hard to make it look fancy.
"Hey, Snow. I'm a bit busy right now~"
"I know; I just wanted you to have something to warm you up a little bit." She smiled and walked up to me. I bent down, and she kissed my cheek. "Just don't stay up too late, okay? We have that thing for Cecil tomorrow morning." I nodded, and she left my room.
My phone vibrated, and I turned to it, ready to answer it with about twenty questions for Roxas. Sadly, it was only a text. I sat on my bed and opened it and read silently.
Canceling date tomorrow.
See you Mon
"Oh, Roxas…" I sighed because it was only Friday. He shouldn't tough out the weekend alone, but what can I do? I don't want to anger him.
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Roxas's POV
Rinoa arrived only fifteen minutes after Leon called for her to spend the night, and she was currently making hot chocolate in the kitchen. Leon was lying on the couch and crying to himself quietly. What I thought was sweet was Riku waiting on our porch in a short sleeve shirt and his PJ pants with a light backpack, just waiting for for me?
I was doing the optional math review packet at the dining room table.
"Roxas?" I looked up at the sound of my name and met Rinoa's reddened eyes from her crying over Yuffie when Leon told her. She placed a glass on the table in front of me, and I sighed quietly. She sat down in front of me at the table, and since she was so much like Yuffie, I knew what she was going to ask.
"I'm fine, so don't worry," I cut her off before she could even form a word. I took a sip and returned to writing about how to solve for x. She reached a hand out and patted it wordlessly.
"It's okay to express your feelings Roxas; you know that, right?" She cocked her head to the side and her black, caramel streaked hair shined lightly as her brown eyes searched mine for any kind of emotion.
Sorry to say she won't find one.
I made sure of that.
"I guess I better go see how Leon's doing, huh?" She glanced toward him on the couch. I nodded lightly and saw the love and comfort lurking in her eyes. I knew that Yuffie's story wasn't completely false. I knew at that moment that Rinoa loved Leon as much as Yuffie did, and I knew that her presence here would be one of the best things for Leon right now.
I closed my math book and stood up, leaving the hot chocolate alone and Rinoa looking confused. I walked toward the steps and walked up them slowly, momentarily pausing at Sora's door. I couldn't hear anything, so I could only assume Riku got Sora to fall asleep. I continued to my room where Muffins waited for me silently. I set my book down on my backpack and sat on my bed.
"Yuffie's gone, Muffs," I told my small cat as she jumped up beside me and rubbed her head on my arm. I grabbed her and held her on my lap and pet her gently.
Everything seemed surreal somehow, like this was all just a dream.
Or a nightmare.
Whatever this was, it just didn't feel real. I knew it was real, that this was really happening, but I just… I silently wished that this was all just a bad dream and that at any moment I was going to wake up in bed with Sora bouncing on it excitedly while Yuffie hovered a piece of toast over my face. But I knew it was a long shot.
A guy can dream, right?
And those dreams were plagued with nightmares.
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Axel's POV
This part would be so much better if Roxas was here. Not only was I dressed in a suit against my will, but I have to look like I'm having fun at this stupid charity event. Stupid Cecil making me come along even though I need to be with Roxas right now.
"Axel?" I turn and smile to Snow as she walks over and sits in the seat that was reserved for Roxas, even though he wasn't coming. "Want a cookie?" She set the plate she was carrying down on the table top, and I gratefully took one. "I'm being seen as a trophy wife again," she sighed, and I laughed quietly. That was how she referred to herself when Cecil would keep her on his arm, but not talk to her, or speak like she wasn't even there.
"I'm sorry; can I leave yet?" I asked silently. She sighed and shook her head.
"If I'm stuck here, so are you," she explained, and I let my head hit the table in utter depression. "But you can call your friend if you're so worried about him." I lifted my head and smiled to her.
"Thanks, but he won't answer."
"Why do you say that?" she asked me curiously.
"Well, he has this tendency to keep to himself when he's going through something emotionally disturbing and/or traumatic," I explained, playing with the white table cloth.
"He's like you in that respect," she summed up, and I nodded. "Well, maybe you could see him tomorrow?" she suggested, and I shrugged.
"A part of me is pretty worried, but another is telling me to let him work things out on his own, you know?" I asked her, and she looked to where Cecil was standing, looking around for her.
"Well, Axel, if he's anything like you, I would approach him, because what happened to you when you kept emotions to yourself?" My eyes widened, and she stood up and walked toward her husband. If that was true, then I have to talk to Roxas about this.
No matter what.
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Roxas's POV
Monday, I can safely say, is going to be a living hell, especially with as little sleep as I have been getting. The nightmares are so terrible that I refuse to sleep again. I have to deal with masking my emotions and reading Sora's. This day is going to suck.
Riku couldn't pick us up because he had a morning doctor's appointment, so Rinoa dropped us off. She had decided to stay the week on our couch until Leon was on his feet again. I opened the door with a brief goodbye to her while Sora remained silent. He hadn't spoken or eaten all weekend, and I was a little worried. I keep all my feelings inside, and Sora just shuts himself away from the world. He grabbed my hand, but his face remained emotionless. His pure blue eyes were still red from all the crying he's been doing. We walked up the steps, and I swear that everyone's happy chatting got quiet.
By now, the news of Yuffie's death had been in the paper, and since this was one of those small towns where everyone knows each other, everyone knew about it. A lot of Sora's friends were all over him with questions, but I just kept him moving until we reached the court yard. Kairi was arguing with Hayner about something while Olette and Pence watched. Once we arrived, all conversation stopped completely, and their faces fell. I released Sora's hand, and Kairi walked up and hugged him gently. I sat down quietly, and Hayner sat beside me while the others comforted Sora.
"How ya doing, man?" he asked me. I shrugged, and he looked at me funny.
"Just tell me I get to use a saw in wood shop today."
He laughed lightly, and I noticed Axel walking into the area. I looked him over, and by his stance and the fact he was alone meant he wanted me to go over to him. I grabbed my bag and walked toward him quietly. The closer I got, the clearer his face became.
He looked oddly pissed off.
Wonder why.
"Why didn't you call me?" he asked quietly, but sharply. I shrugged at him which only served to piss him off more. "I know you, Roxas. You keep it all in, but I can see it in your eyes," he explained, and I looked away angrily.
Damn!
"I want to handle this my way, okay? Leave me alone." I tried to turn away, but Axel grabbed my upper arm. I tried to pull away, but his grip was iron. He started to pull me behind the trees in the corner of the square court yard. No one could see us from here and I knew that was just what he wanted. He pushed me up against the wall and glared down at me.
"Keeping feelings to yourself is a dangerous thing, Roxas," he said in a growling tone. "I would know, okay? Talk to me!" he almost yelled. I really hoped no one could hear him, because I would be a little upset if people found out about us…especially right now.
"What if I don't want to talk, Axel?" I bit back at him. "Maybe I feel better figuring things out myself, so butt out of my life you~" He pushed me against the wall with a forceful kiss to the lips. I tried to hit him, but he pinned my arms at my sides. He pulled away, but he was still so close to me. I could feel his breath on my face, and I could clearly see the worry hidden deep in those green eyes.
"Roxas, I love you, and I want what's best for you." He kissed my forehead and then my cheek, all the way down to my neck. "Please talk to me…" he whispered against my neck. I paused, but only for a moment.
"I really have nothing to say, Axel. Please let go of me," I asked quietly, and he released his grip on my wrists. I moved swiftly to the side, leaving him to stare at where he had me pinned. I rejoined my friends as we walked to homeroom together. Kairi was walking side by side with Sora, who was partially smiling.
I was glad someone made him a bit happier.
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When I walked toward my lunch table, I noticed Sora was sitting extremely close to Riku who had arrived at school an hour ago. The closer I got, I realized Sora was crying again, and Riku was comforting him. Kairi wasn't talking, even though she's the one who always talks. I set my packed lunch on the other side of Sora while Riku rubbed Sora's thigh and held his hand as he cried. I was about to ask if Sora ate anything yet, but he didn't even buy lunch.
"Hey, Roxas." I smiled lightly to Riku who was trying to make some sort of conversation to distract Sora. I wanted to thank him for that, because Sora looked over and wiped his eyes. I handed him an apple slice.
"Here, Sora." He took it, but he set it down on the table.
"I'm not hungry, Roxas, but thanks anyway~" Riku yanked Sora around and kissed him. The whole table stared as Riku began to use tongue to open Sora's mouth. He pulled away quickly and shoved the apple slice in Sora's mouth. I'm pretty sure the jaws of everyone watching just hit the floor.
"Eat, Sora," he commanded. I laughed slightly as Sora looked horrified at his boyfriend while he chewed. I ate one of my own, and Riku held a 'thumbs up' to me. I passed the container to him, and he held it in front of Sora. "Eat it on your own, or I'll do it again," he threatened, and Sora grabbed it from his hands and ate it quietly.
"Roxas." I turned to see Hayner looking worried as he stood beside the table. Olette and Pence sat down with their lunches. "Can I talk to you in private, please?" I stood up and followed him to the hallway until we reached the bathroom. He closed the door and locked it before turning to me.
"What's up?" I asked him, and he stood in front of me.
"Trust me, if it wasn't important I would let you deal with your loss~"
"I'm fine with that; what is it?" I asked. He looked as if he didn't believe me, but he took a deep breath.
"Seifer asked me to go to his place at Sunset Hill tonight…to talk." I stared at him, confused. "I told you about what happened when I didn't come home that one night, right?" he asked, and I nodded. He had been wandering around in the rain since he missed the last train of the night. He was attacked by a gang there, but Seifer stood up for him and gave him dry clothes and a place to stay. Basically, he was being oddly nice to his nemesis, even though they were once best friends.
"So?" I asked him, and he looked at me like I was the biggest idiot ever.
"Hello-o! All alone, and don't forget about that fact that he knows I like him! It's scary, and I don't know if I should go or not!"
"Hayner, if you like him, go for it. The worst thing that can happen is he isn't a very good romantic," I explained, and he relaxed a little.
"Okay…" We were silent for a moment and I moved to open the door when a hand on my shoulder stopped me, "You sure you're alright? I mean, look at Sora…I'm just worried~"
"Along with everyone else. Really, people, I'm fine! Jeez!" I opened the door and slammed it behind me. Why were people so worried about me? I'm fine!
On the surface anyhow.
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Axel's POV
"I hate ties!" Demyx cried angrily, throwing up his arms in defeat. He was dressed in a black suit along with the other males in the room. Zexion sighed and walked over to him and tied the tie for him.
"That's why I wear clip-ons!" Marluxia cheered happily from the sneered at him. She was dressed in black slacks and a black blouse with a diamond necklace Marluxia bought her for Christmas.
"That's why I call you a pansy, Marly. A real man can put on a tie on his own," she kissed his cheek. "Be more like Zexion, or Axel."
"Guys? Can we please focus?" I asked my friends sharply, and they all turned to me with apologetic looks in their eyes. I sighed and grabbed my jacket. "Let's act like mature eighteen-year-olds, please. This is a serious night, okay? I don't want you disrupting~"
"Axel, breathe," Demyx stated as Zexion finished re-buttoning his jacket since he was one off. I sighed and grabbed my motorcycle keys and headed toward the door.
"Follow me to the funeral home, okay?" I called behind me as I walked out the door. I was afraid for Roxas for keeping his feelings to himself for so long. It's been almost a complete week, and he's only remained indifferent to the world and any other emotion besides irritation at people for caring. He needed to express himself and if he doesn't do it by tonight, I'll get him to talk on my own.
Willingly or not, he will talk.
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Roxas's POV
"Thanks, Rinoa," I told her as she finished straightening out my collar. I yawned for about the twelfth time in the last minute alone. I'm getting sick and tired of not sleeping, but there's nothing I can do. I just stared at my reflection, trying to look awake. I was dressed in a black dress shirt and black pants and shiny black shoes. Sora was also dressed in a black suit along with Leon. Rinoa was wearing a black dress.
I stood by the open casket and stared down at Yuffie. Her black hair was brushed over like it normally was, and she was dressed like she was going to pick us up from school or something. She was wearing her favorite pair of black skinny jeans along with her favorite white blouse. She looked like she was sleeping, and I hoped that she was just sleeping.
But she wasn't. She was gone and never coming back.
She was smiling, too.
"Roxas?" I turned to see Sora gesturing to the people arriving. I stood beside him and Leon while Rinoa greeted people by the door. I listened absently to the people walking by.
I heard tons of 'I'm so sorry for your loss', many 'She will be missed by everyone', and the one I hated hearing the most: 'She was such a good person, we'll all miss her.'
It bothers me because I bet half of these people here barely knew her at all. It also bothers me that I'm surrounded by her favorite things with a video that Leon's work buddies made using the things Leon gave them playing her favorite songs. I had a hollow feeling in the pit of my gut, but I ignored it until I saw Axel. He was waiting in the back of the line with the others, and it brought a gentle smile to my face.
Zexion was quietly chastising Demyx for messing up his tie and dirtying his pants, and Marluxia and Larxene were whispering things and giggling between themselves. Axel just looked at me. When he neared the front of the line, he let the others go in front of him, meaning Marluxia and Larxene were first.
"I'm really sorry; Yuffie was really cool," Larxene started with a tinge of sadness in her voice. "She'll really be missed," she finished. Marluxia nodded in agreement and patted Sora's shoulder and then mine as they walked off.
"Really sorry, you guys," Demyx started, rubbing the back of his head nervously.
"I hope that if you need anything at all, you'll let us know," Zexion added in to save his boyfriend. Leon nodded, and Sora smiled slightly before noticing Riku in the back of the line looking slightly wet. Then Axel stepped forward.
"You have my condolences, and I hope that I can be of any help if need be." He then looked right into my eyes. "If you need someone to talk to, I hope I'll be your first call." He stepped out of line, and I grabbed his arm without moving my eyes from in front of me. Sora glanced to me confusedly for a moment, but decided to listen to who was currently talking. Axel must have telepathic powers, because I couldn't speak at the moment. He stopped walking and turned to stand right behind me, holding my right hand behind my back. I glanced to Yuffie, and I swore her smile widened even more. The hollow feeling faded away some for a moment when I felt loved. When the viewing was over, I was talking with Axel and the others, holding Axel's hand for comfort.
"Hey, Roxas?" I looked over to Axel, and he smiled lightly. I looked away to where they were moving Yuffie's casket. The funeral service was tomorrow, and they had to get her ready for that tomorrow. I felt the warm hand in my own tighten slightly, and I looked back to see Axel smiling at me with a hint of worry in his eyes. A worry so small, no one but I could have noticed it being there.
"You look tired, Roxas." I looked over to Demyx who looked me over cautiously.
"Woke up early after going to bed late," I lied. To be honest, I just have been having terrible nightmares and haven't sleeping well. I know Axel probably can see right through my little lie, but he doesn't let on.
"I'll drop you off at home," he volunteered, and I nodded as I got up and followed him toward the door. I hope that Riku won't be spending the night again. I couldn't sleep last night, because I didn't want to worry Sora and Riku. Please let Sora stay with Riku again and for Leon and Rinoa to be away. I want to sleep.
Or…try at least.
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"Sora?" I asked with a smile. Sora turned to me with a big smile of his own and Riku appeared beside him. "I'm glad you're here; have you seen Yuffie and Leon?" Sora pointed somewhere else, and I followed his finger and ran toward the two parental figures.
"Roxas!" Yuffie called out happily, but suddenly, she fell forward, and Leon caught her.
"Yuffie!" he yelled as she died in his arms.
"No, Sora!"I turned, and Riku was cradling a dying Sora in his arms.
"Sora!" I yelled as I felt like I was going to cry.
"Roxas!" I turned to see Axel holding his hand out, but he was fading into the background. I reached out for him through tears, but suddenly the gap between us grew immensely, and I couldn't reach him. "ROXAS!"
"NO! AXEL!"
I screamed.
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Sora's POV
I shot awake and looked to my door. Riku woke up, and I got out of bed quickly and ran toward the source of the frightening sound: Roxas's room. I practically kicked the door in and saw Roxas thrashing about, screaming in terrible pain. I ran to his side and grabbed his flailing limbs and held them to the bed.
"Roxas!" I called to him, and his blue eyes opened suddenly. He was sweating and panting. "Roxas." He attached himself to me in a hug, and I sat beside him.
"You're okay," he said quietly, and I gently held him as well. Riku was standing in the door frame staring at Roxas sadly. "I'm sorry if I woke you," Roxas apologized quietly and pulled away.
"What were you dreaming about?" I asked worriedly as he lay down again. He felt cold, even though he was sweating only moments before.
"Nothing… you should go back to bed," he told me. I was about to pursue the subject when Riku shook his head. I glanced down to Roxas as he pulled the sheets up closer to his face. I sat beside him and grabbed his hand from under the sheets and stroked it quietly. Riku sat beside me. Yuffie would do this when we would have nightmares. She would either sit beside us and holds our hands until we fell asleep again, or get in our beds and sleep beside us. I sat wordlessly with Riku, hoping Roxas would fall asleep again, because if my hunch was right, these weren't the first of the nightmares.
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Roxas's POV
It was time.
The part I dreaded more than anything prior to this.
The actual funeral.
"Roxas?" I blinked slowly and turned to Sora. He looked worried, and I couldn't blame him. Instead of spending the night at Riku's like he had all week, he stayed home and heard my nightmare. I told him nothing, and even though I know he fell asleep after coming to me, I stayed awake. No sleep equals no nightmare, right?
"Yeah?" I asked. He pointed to the milk I was pouring into my cereal bowl which was now overflowing. "Shit!" I cursed and set the milk down and grabbed a paper towel and started to dry it up.
"How much sleep would you guess you've gotten this week?" he asked curiously. I shrugged and threw the paper towel away and sat at the table and grabbed my utensil.
"Enough," I stated as I stabbed it into my cereal.
"Enough to think your fork is a spoon?" I looked down to my cereal and realized what I thought was my spoon was a fork. Maybe I haven't been getting as much as I thought. I got up from the table right as Riku walked in.
"Having fun in here?" he asked lightly and sat beside Sora and kissed his cheek. "What's for lunch?" he asked with a smile.
"Whatever the hell you can find. I need to go shopping," I muttered quietly. Sora sighed from somewhere behind me, and I heard Riku laugh a little.
"I thought Rinoa went shopping with dad yesterday to get him out and about?" I snorted and turned to him.
They bought milk because Leon almost broke down in the store, because Rinoa asked him the same exact question that mo- Yuffie would always ask him." I turned from them and looked around worriedly. I almost called her mom again. She wasn't though.
"Well, are you guys ready for today?" Riku asked, and I turned to see Sora look away with a slight nod. I didn't answer, only sat at the table so I could eat. I needed to try and get some sleep or something because I'm sure that any day now my emotional barrier is going to break. I sure as hell don't want that to happen.
"What time is the service?" Riku asked as he checked his watch, and Sora looked up in thought.
"Around five, I think. Rinoa had to work today, and Leon didn't want to do anything without her being around. You know how he is about displaying emotions," Sora finished as he took a bite of his ham sandwich. Riku took the other half from his plate, and I set my bowl in the sink. I looked out the window longingly, just hoping for some kind of way out of this, but there was only one thing that I noticed.
"Looks like rain," I stated, referring to the dark clouds in the distance. Maybe it would start to rain and we would have to reschedule the funeral.
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Fuck.
It wasn't raining, but the clouds hanging over just made this even worse.
Axel wasn't here yet, and I feel like I'm about to break. Damn! Get me outta here!
"Mr. Strife?" I turned, wondering who would call me Mr. Strife. I saw the priest from the church that Yuffie went to growing up.
"Yes?" I asked. I just finished buttoning up my suit jacket in the small tent they set up in case it rained. He stepped forward more, and I eased my glare slightly.
"I was wondering if you would like me to refer to you as her youngest son." I stared, confused. "Leon told me she always looked to you as her own son and not her nephew, but I wanted to ask first." I just stared at him. She did always think of me as her son; she treated me like that anyway. But, do I want other people to know that? Do I want to lie?
"No, just… I'm her nephew," I sighed quietly, and he nodded before leaving. I had a strange feeling in my gut that made me want to puke up my cereal. I ran my hand through my golden spikes before slapping an indifferent look on my face to show the crowd outside. I spotted Sora talking to Kairi as she hugged him close with Riku standing faithfully at his side. I scanned even more to see Leon talking to a few of his friends from work with Rinoa standing beside him, talking with them as well. I didn't see any of Axel's friends or the red head himself. Maybe he screwed up the time, or got scared off by the chance of rain. That pyro hates the rain. I walked over to Sora, and Kairi tackled me with a hug. I placed one arm around her thin frame as well.
"Naminé tried to get a plane ticket to come, but you know how impossible it is," she told me, and I nodded. Everyone thinks I was in love with her, but to keep my secret, I don't say anything. I looked behind her to where Reno stood stalk still. He looked tired and weary and just about ready to collapse from exhaustion.
"Sorry, Roxas," he said quietly, and I nodded. I saw a blond man behind him in a blacksuit talking to a few people. "That's my boss and friend, Rufus Shinra. He came on his own." He rolled his eyes, and I smiled slightly. The man walked up and nodded to me.
"Sorry to hear of your loss; you have my condolences," he said in a voice that dripped with superiority. I nodded as he walked off, dragging Reno after him. I turned and yelped as the person standing close to me laughed.
"Axel!" I yelped and hit his arm and he grabbed it in pain and chuckled lightly. "Don't do that!" I berated him while he giggled and nodded. I stood away from him and he walked up to me and placed a hand on my shoulder.
"Sorry, didn't mean to sneak up on you," he apologized, and I nodded. I noticed everyone gathering close to the closed casket in the holder above the grave. I walked toward it and he followed me quietly.
"Hey, Rox." I glanced over to Sora, and he smiled slightly. The priest walked to the head of the group and opened his book and began to speak. Axel grabbed my hand and held it tightly, as it was hidden between us. I stared ahead blankly while they went on about ashes and heaven and how she will be missed greatly. Before I knew it, Axel and I were the only ones left standing there.
"Roxy?" he asked quietly. I turned to him slowly and saw he held out a single rose and I took it in my hand and stared at it for a long time. It was white, because Yuffie loved white roses. I closed my eyes and put it onto her casket. I turned and he wrapped an arm around me as we walked away.
"Axel? Can you take me to the beach?" I asked quietly, and he nodded as he got onto the motorcycle first. I didn't put on the helmet when he offered it to me. I just climbed on and wrapped my arms around him and leaned my head on his warm back. He nodded and put the helmet on himself and started to drive off. I guess he knew better than to tell me that it was probably going to rain because he stayed silent, even as we bought tickets for the beach and rode the train. I stayed away from him and was silent, because so many thoughts flooded my mind like a tsunami hitting an island.
I guess I never really accepted it until now. It really, finally hit me that Yuffie was dead. She was never coming back and I was without a mother.
A mother. She was more of a mother to me than my own mother. She understood everything about me and could see right through me every time. We always had fun when we were together, and she even referred to me as…
"Roxas?" Axel asked. It was raining, and we were sitting inside the beach house that my family owned. I was on the couch, and I had no idea how I got there.
Yuffie would have laughed and told me to pay attention. She treated me like Sora, like Leon. She treated me like family, but even closer than just an aunt. She was my mother and I was her…son. Yes. I was a son to her.
My mother is dead.
I sprang from my seat and ran toward the door, yanking it open, hearing Axel shouting after me, but it was deaf to my ears. I ran down the boardwalk to the beach. At this point, it was storming heavily; the rain was coming down in sheets, and I could barely see two inches in front of my nose. I just ran until I couldn't anymore. I was tired of hiding behind myself, curling up inside and acting cold. I just wanted to lift the heavy weight from my heart, and breathe again. I just wanted to smile again and mean it!
"ROXAS!" I heard through the rain. I fell down to my knees and stared at the damp sand below me. I think I might have started to cry as well. "Roxas!" I felt someone slide down beside me. "You scared the living shit out of me! Are you out of your fucking mind? It's dangerous out here!" he yelled to me.
"Axel," I struggled past trembling lips. His glare slipped off his face to one of concern. "Please…help me. I want to be free of this weight…of her," I cried, and he helped me to my feet. He placed his hands on my shoulders and stooped down slightly. I looked into his green eyes, forgetting that I was soaked to the bone and trembling from the cold.
"Roxas. Just… scream," he told me. I turned from him, and I did. It was ear splitting, and filled with pain, but I was forcing all of what I had been holding back into this; all my nightmares, my emotions, and all of those heavy fears. I felt the tears mixing with the rain on my face. I'm not sure how long I was screaming, but when I was done, I fell sideways, but Axel caught me and gently brought me to the ground. I attached myself to his neck and cried. I just cried something I told myself to never do again.
But it felt so fucking good!
"Roxas," he whispered into my hair as he held me. I was lying on my side, and he was on one knee kissing my head and rubbing my back. It thundered, and only seconds later, the sky lit up with lightning. "That feels better, doesn't it?" he whispered into my ear. I nodded slightly. It felt as if the weight of the world had been lifted from my shoulders, and I could breathe again. "Let's get inside… it's cold and wet out here." He picked me up bridal style and started to walk toward the boardwalk. I hadn't moved from my spot, hiding in the crook of his neck.
We reached the small house, and he set me down. I stood, trembling from the cold. He closed the door and locked it. I stood wordlessly as he walked about gathering blankets and putting them in the master bedroom at the end of the hall. He came back to where I stood, because I saw his feet stop in front of me.
"You must be freezing," he said. He took my hand and led me toward the bedroom. I looked to him blankly, and he kissed my forehead lightly and moved his hands to my wet jacket. He pulled it off slowly as he kissed around my face. When the jacket was off, he brought me closer to the bed and kissed my lips while his hands roamed my chest until he reached the buttons on my shirt. He unbuttoned them slowly, and I suddenly kissed back with much vigor and wrapped my arms around his neck as he deepened it. He slid the soaked shirt from my cold skin, and I shivered from the loss of the cloth and Axel's hot mouth kissing my collar bone. I gasped as he stood up before sitting me down on the bed, never stopping his warm kisses.
"Let me warm you up, Roxas," he whispered huskily in my ear, and I gasped as his warm hands moved over my side. I looked up to him, and with trembling hands, I moved to unbutton his shirt. My hands were shaking so much because not only was I cold, but Axel's piercing green eyes were watching me lustfully. I barely got the third button when his hands found mine. "Let me help," he said and he steadied my hands as I unbuttoned the rest. I slid it from his shoulders and he took it off the rest of the way and threw it to the ground where the rest of our soaked clothes were. I stared at his semi-muscular chest and ran cold hands along the warm body. He released a shuddering breath, and I stopped to look up at him.
"This is your first time, huh?" I nodded weakly and blushed. He held a hand to my cheek. "That's nothing to be ashamed of; I love you." He kissed my lips sensually and pulled away. "Let me lead, okay? Just relax for me," he commanded and I nodded. He kissed me again and placed his hands on my hips as he straddled my waist more comfortably. I didn't know what to do besides kiss him back. I had never been so…intimate like this and I wanted it more than words could explain. He moved to my neck after kissing down my jaw line. He kissed the same spot until he got to my pulse point, and I gasped loudly. He nibbled lightly on that spot, and I moaned with closed eyes. It was too much, and I had a feeling he was nowhere close to being done. I'm sure he felt my pulse going crazy, but he didn't make fun of me. He just continued to run his hands all over my chest.
It felt so good.
He decided my neck had enough and he moved to my chest, hitting all the right places to make me wither and moan beneath him. He reached for the button on my pants and met my lips again for another passionate kiss. He invaded my mouth with his tongue and enticed mine to dance with his. I was a little sloppy, but he obviously didn't care. He got the button open and he pulled the zipper down incredibly slowly. I wanted to tell him to hurry up, but that was just my raging hormones talking. He purposely brushed against my sensitive…lower area and I gasped, fisting my hands in the sheets. He pulled the pants down and threw them to the ground, and I was left in just my boxers. He removed his pants as well, and I just stared at him and his obvious want. I leaned up and kissed him and he kissed back, wrapping his arms around me tightly. I ran my needy hands through his slightly damp mane of red hair.
Then he grabbed at my boxers and started to pull them down, but I froze. He pulled back when I stopped kissing him.
"Roxas?"
"Let's…stop here today, Axel," I looked away, embarrassed by my fear of giving myself to the one person I love and who loves me for me. He grabbed my hand and brought it to his chest and placed it where his heart was. I paused and felt tears prick the corners of my eyes.
His heart was beating like crazy. I couldn't pick up a rhythm of any type and I…
"I only feel this way with you, Roxas." He leaned down and rested his forehead on my own. "You and only you, but if you want to~"
"No!" I grabbed his hand and looked up at him through the tears in my eyes. "Please, Axel… take me. Just promise me you'll always love me!" I begged, and he smiled. He didn't smirk, but really smiled. It was similar to that of the picture I took all those months ago on the forest trail.
"I'll always love you, Roxas, no matter what." He kissed me and grabbed the waist band of my boxers again, but I felt no hesitation.
I felt warm, loved, and I knew that there was nothing but truth in his words. It hurt, a lot, but Axel stopped when I would ask him to, go when I asked him to, and he made me feel like I was the only thing he cared about in his life. He turned the white hot pain into incredible pleasure, and it was no doubt the best night of my life.
For the first time in a week, my sleep was in no way disturbed at all.
XxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxXxX
Axel's POV
He looks like an angel when he sleeps.
I pulled the blanket up more on him and continued to watch him sleep, guarding him from any harm that may haunt his dreams. The poor kid collapsed right after he finished. I exhausted him, but I was glad to have made him happy. I got up and grabbed my boxers and pulled them on, content to cuddling up beside my Roxas.
That's right, he's mine now in every sense of the word.
I heard something on the floor and reached for my pants and pulled my phone out. Why would anyone be calling at midnight?
Oh right; we didn't really tell anyone where we were going, or that we were staying the night away. Shit. I grabbed it and opened it.
"Hello?" I asked, and I heard talking - more like screaming - in the background.
"Axel? Where the hell are you!" Demyx yelled into my ear.
"At the beach with Roxas," I explained, and I heard him take a breath, but he paused.
"Why are you there? What happened?"
"Well, I got him to express his feelings for the death of Yuffie…and had sex with him." I think I heard some kind of choking noise.
"Holy shit, dude." He sighed, but then he took a deep breath. "I got some news you might not like to hear, but you should know," he explained, and I nodded, knowing full well he couldn't see it. "Axel…your dad is out of jail and no doubt coming here for you…and those close to you." I paused and stared forward with frightened, wide eyes. I turned to glance back at Roxas; his back was bare and facing me. My eyes trailed down so I could see him in all his glory.
Roxas… Oh no.
My dad wouldn't hesitate to kill Roxas if he knew of his connection to me. I closed the phone, even though Demyx was calling out to me frantically. I climbed under the sheets and pulled Roxas closer to me. He rolled over and looked at me through groggy eyes.
"Ax? What's wrong?" he asked me lazily, his eyes blinking slowly.
"Nothing." I sighed and wrapped my arms around him tighter. "Go back to sleep, my angel." I kissed the top of his head and he got comfortable in my embrace. I didn't want to lose him… but what do I do about my dad?
He wants to kill me and all I hold dear!
WOW! They had hevily implied Sex! You're probably wondering why I just didn't explain everything about their 'night' together, because I know I can, but the answer is quite simple. Do I really want my older sister reading male on male sex with her two favorite characters? No. Bare with me people. reviews make me happy, and the chapters come!