The Lake House Chapter 4, a criminal minds fanfic

More fluff of the fluffy variety. With just a hint of angst.

Criminal Minds characters and universe are not mine, but the original characters, storyline and wording are mine.

The lake House

Chapter 04

Lily had left the door to the bedroom open and he could hear her get into bed and, shortly after that, her breathing even out as she fell asleep. He dozed in and out for a little while before falling asleep. It was a light sleep, he thought perhaps because the men who had taken her were an unknown variable and he needed to remain at least partly alert, even when sleeping. He heard her get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom, but other than that it was uneventful.

When he woke in the morning, the first thing he saw was a mug of steaming coffee on the table next to the sofabed, the second was Lily's form curled up in his easy chair. This morning she was wearing dark leggings and a thick, cream coloured sweater, her long, lustrous hair pooling around her shoulders. The first thought that went through his head was how he wanted to pull her into his arms, fisting his hands in that hair. Even his subconscious mind acknowledged that this was further than just feeling protective of her. She was smiling at him, looking pleased with herself for having been able to do something for him, even something small like coffee. He picked it up and drank a little.

"Thank you. And good morning. Have you been up long?" he asked with a smile.

"Good morning. No, I haven't been awake for long. But you were sleeping so well, and I figured you earned it." she finished softly.

"I think we both did." He folded back the blankets and sat on the edge of the sofabed with his coffee. His heart did a little flipflop when he saw her eyes sweep over his bare chest appreciatively and her pupils dilate. As he raised the mug again, he saw her eyes flit to his flexing muscles. Her teeth bit down on her bottom lip and she moved her eyes away for a moment. That little gesture sent shivers through him. Now would be a good time to shower, he thought. Although, looking at her again, he wasn't sure she looked quite well. Her eyes were a little glassy, her skin just a shade too pale and her nose a shade too pink. Maybe an after effect of her dip in the lake just starting to make itself known. Her immune system would have had to have been pretty damn low for at least twenty-four hours after that. His thoughts were borne out when she sniffed a little and it turned into a cough.

"Feeling a bit under the weather?" he asked.

"Yeah, I woke up for a little while earlier coughing a bit, didn't think much of it. Just a cold I think, but I'll keep my distance as much as I can, maybe I can get away with not passing it to you." She smiled, it was a little weak but it was clear that she was still feeling mostly herself. Considering how much she had been through, he was astounded at how she had bounced back. If he had to take care of her while she had a cold, well it was a small price to pay when they could have been having to deal with frostbite, pneumonia, even… He cut his mind off with a sharp burst of anger when it tried to remind him that she had come very close to death. That was a scenario he could and would not contemplate; even if he didn't understand how much it would effect him, his unconscious mind did, and refused to entertain the thought.

Suddenly her words registered. He went cold. Keep her distance? Meaning…no touching. Damn. He sighed as he drained the last of his coffee and stood up to take it to the kitchen. While he didn't entirely understand the sudden misery he felt – they would have had to stop touching at some point…surely – he did like the slightly dreamy expression on her face that he caught out of the corner of his eye as she watched him walk across the room in just his pyjama bottoms. He washed his mug more slowly than usual while he tried to suppress his pleased grin. When he had it under control he turned back to her.

"I'm going to go get dressed, then we can have some breakfast." She nodded, her smile a little crooked, her gaze still appreciative, although he could tell that she was doing her best to hide it.

Once he was in the shower he washed mechanically while his mind played over many things. He was almost ready to accept that what he felt around her was not just the need to protect her. And he thought that, similarly, the way she seemed to be drawn to him was more than just the fact that he made her feel safe. But still, the age gap was a large one by his guess, he would put her at thirty-five at most, her ordeal had made her look a few years older at first. Under other circumstances, at this point he might be tempted to flirt openly, or ask her out to dinner. But these were not normal circumstances. They were stuck together for at least two weeks, and if he pursued her, even ignoring the fact that she had recently been held captive and abused, and it became clear that it was a mistake, or that her feelings didn't mirror his, it would be stressful for them both. Her apparent willingness to put distance between them now also did not bode well in his mind. That, and he just didn't like not being able to be near her. He wiped his hand across his face, bowing his head under the hot water. He was in big trouble.

When he had finished dressing he fished around in his bottom drawer until he found what he was looking for and carried it out with him, going straight to the kitchen. When he returned to her with the filled hot water bottle her smile erased a lot of his negative feelings even if it didn't erase his doubts.

"Here. One of these always makes me feel better when I have a cold." He tucked in under the blanket she had drawn around her.

She tried to thank him but ended up coughing instead. She looked at him apologetically.

"Don't worry about it. I'll make us something to eat, you stay there until I'm done." he nodded at her, only just managing to remember not to touch her in reassurance before he turned away and walked to the kitchen.

Lily had still been feeling well enough to walk around so they ate at the table, talking long after they had finished. Only this time, he refused to let her help with the dishes. Her disappointed look mirrored the disappointment he felt at not having her by his side while he carried out the small chore.

When he returned to the living area he saw that she had folded up the sofabed he had slept on and was curled up in one corner, the blanket draped over her again. He had an idea.

"How about we switch roles today and I read to you for a while?" Her delighted grin was answer enough.

"Anything in particular you'd like?"

"Surprise me." she said with a smile.

He pulled his easy chair a few feet from her and walked to the bookcase, casting his gaze over the books. He picked up Stephen King's The Green Mile, knowing that she had seen the film but not read the book. He settled in his chair, noting that she did the same, sliding down on the sofa and resting her head on the arm. He rested his feet on the coffee table and opened the book. He began reading, flicking his gaze between her and the words in front of him. She seemed to alternate between gazing into the distance and closing her eyes in pleasure as he read. He found himself enjoying himself immensely.

As the first chapter ended he felt her look over at him.

"You have the most wonderful voice." Lily said softly. He smiled in answer and held her gaze for a moment. It seemed to say more than her words had. He felt the connection between them begin to pull, and it took everything he had to turn back to the book instead of going over to her to touch her hand, her face. With an inward sigh he started to read again, feeling very much like an orbiting body caught in her gravity. After two more chapters the pull to her was becoming more and more distracting. As he excused himself to go outside to check that nothing was amiss, he noticed that she was starting to look a little stressed, too. Perhaps he wasn't doing as good a job as he hoped at hiding his turmoil and to her appeared agitated. As he sat down on the chilly porch seat and glanced over the frozen lake and silent trees he resolved to try harder to keep his raw nerves more well hidden.

When Aaron returned inside he found that Lily had set up a game of chess on the coffee table. She quirked an eyebrow in challenge. He grinned. They played five games, him winning three to her two. He was doing a fairly good job, he thought, of keeping his emotions in check, even though his entire body was aching in the effort to stay away from her. She, on the other hand, seemed increasingly distracted as well as increasingly unwell. When she moved her hand away from him as he went to reach for her mug to get her another hot drink, something inside him cracked and he turned on his heel quickly so she couldn't see his distress. He heard her coughing in earnest and had to grip the edge of the counter until his knuckles turned white to stop himself from going to her. When he returned to her with her drink, her face looked as miserable as he felt.

They talked quietly for half an hour before he thought to look at the clock. Damnit. He should have gotten her something to eat for lunch over an hour ago. He noted her quiet footsteps as she followed him to the kitchen. She sat on one of the tall stools at the breakfast bar while he cooked, doing her best to keep her side of the conversation going but he could tell she was having trouble. He kept finding her looking at him, particularly his hands, whenever she thought he wasn't looking, and the look on her face made him ache. Such excruciating longing filled her eyes that it left him breathless.

He ate without really tasting the food, more caught up in her as she ate. Even as sick as she was starting to look, he couldn't tear his eyes away from her lush mouth. As they walked back to the living area she took a step to the side to put distance between them, even though he could tell she wanted to move closer to him, and something in him snapped. He stopped in his tracks while she continued walking. When she realised, she turned to face him.

"I can't do this." he said. "This is stupid. It's just a cold and not being near you is killing me. Maybe I just need to protect you or something and maybe it's not bothering you at all but it's screwing with my head." With two long strides he was in front of her.

"It's not just you. It's hard for me, too." she said miserably. That was all it took.

He wrapped his arms around her and picked her up, holding her to him.

"I'll have whatever you've got, just don't make me stay away from you again. At least for now."

"I won't." she whispered against his skin. She had thrown her arms around his neck and wrapped her legs around his waist. "I was only thinking about not giving you my cold. I didn't think it would be a problem. And I don't really know why it is any more than you do. But not being able to touch you…it…it just felt all wrong."

He crossed to the other side of the sofa and sat them down on it, pulling the blanket over her.

"You could be right," she said "about the protection. Maybe I need to feel protected and you need to feel like you're protecting me and touching helps us both." She stretched out a little and lay her head on his chest. The tension he had been feeling inside lessened almost immediately.

"What if…" he wasn't quite sure what he wanted to say. "What if it's something else?"

"What if it is?" she held his gaze steadily. There were a lot of things going around in his head, most of which were more than a little garbled.

"I'm forty-two." he blurted out.

"I'm thirty-four." she answered without batting an eye and put her head back down on his chest, tightening her arms around him. "If it did turn out to be something else, it wouldn't matter to me if you were a hundred and two. But let's deal with it a little at a time. This is an odd situation and at least we know what not to do if we want to stay unstressed." she giggled a little.

"That we do." he kissed the top of her head. "Why don't you doze for a bit, see if you feel any better later?"

"That would be nice. But talk to me for a bit, I like the sound of your voice."

He did as she asked, talking to her for a long time, telling her about some of favourite experiences, why he'd come for a few weeks vacation in the isolated cabin. Finally he saw that she had fallen asleep, but only talked more quietly. Mostly it was innocent, but he did drop his guard at one point and lay still for a full minute trying to figure out if she'd heard him.

"I think we might have to figure out what 'else' is at some point, because I can't even think about getting to a point where I don't get to hold you like this." He had realised what he'd said almost immediately and tensed, listening for any difference in her breathing. There was none, it was even and shallow. She hadn't moved either, so he let himself relax. Later he had to move her to go get something to eat, but she couldn't eat much, her cold had gotten bad enough that all she really wanted to do was sleep, so he took her into the bedroom and tucked her into the bed before going back to the living area to eat his meal. He read for a while, and tried to watch a film, but it felt kind of odd being awake while she was asleep and his body soon told him that it wanted to do the same. He made up the sofabed and left the film playing while he fell asleep.