Twilight is the property of Stephanie Meyer.
Many thanks to mynxi for the time she spends solving my problems, written and otherwise. Love ya big time, Sweets.
Chapter Sixteen
BPOV
"I love you for wanting to help her, but I promised you we'd stay together, and I won't leave you alone here." Jasper's refusal to leave me to visit Alice was interrupted by the sound of a car door outside. He and the others visibly tensed as my own heart began to race in anxiety, wondering who would be visiting the Cullens unexpectedly.
Noticing that Jasper's expression had relaxed into an easy smile, I forced myself to calm down. The others stood up as the front door opened and closed.
"Good thing I was just thinkin' how I could go for a little girl time," a cheerful voice drawled out as an unknown vampire walked casually into the living room. He was almost as tall as Jasper and had shaggy, light blonde hair. I met his crimson eyes as he walked further into the room, but strangely I felt no fear as he approached me.
The Cullens were almost vibrating with tension, but Jasper shook his head minutely and their posture relaxed as he projected calm to them. The stranger knelt down in front of Jasper and me before gently reaching out to touch my face with his cool hand.
"Hey there, Little Bird. I've been waitin' to meet ya for a long time now." His voice was soft and his red eyes were kind as he looked up at me. He flashed a quick grin at Jasper before meeting my gaze again. "Ya did real good holdin' on to him. I think you'll do just fine."
The endearment confirmed my suspicions that this was the mysterious Peter. I kept quiet as I looked back at him, reading nothing but affection and safety in his expression. For a moment I fought against the strange, unearned trust I felt for him, but I gradually came to the conclusion that I should follow my instincts and have faith in him.
I smiled as I leaned out of Jasper's arms to wrap Peter's hard body in a hug. His arms grasped me gently as he hugged me back.
"Nice ta meet ya, Little Sister," he whispered into the top of my head.
"Nice to meet you too, Peter," I whispered back as I gingerly moved out of Jasper's lap and climbed onto Peter's. I tugged on Jasper until he leaned down enough for me to press a gentle kiss to his lips. "Go try to help Alice, Jasper. Peter and I will be fine here."
Jasper closed his eyes and winced as the Cullens began to react. Emmett was the first to erupt, shouting out, "No fucking way is she staying here with him, Jasper! I don't care who he is and what you guys used to do together, she is not safe with him!"
I felt a strong flash of anger at Emmett's assumption that he had any input on my actions and opened my mouth to protest.
"Relax and let us handle this one, Darlin'," Peter said softly. I kept quiet in compliance with his suggestion, but I couldn't resist glaring at Emmett, who looked away uncomfortably.
Carlisle cleared his throat before speaking. "As much as I wish Emmett was more polite in expressing his opinion, I have to agree with his concerns over Bella's safety, Jasper." Esme nodded in agreement and Emmett muttered "Damn straight," under his breath.
Jasper stood up to face them before speaking in a calm tone. "I appreciate that you are all acting out of concern for Bella's safety," he began. "But what you need to understand is that her safety is my primary concern as well, and I would never risk it by leaving her with someone I didn't trust. I'm sure you've all realized by now that this is Peter, and other than myself, there is no other being on Earth she will be safer with. So if Bella's comfortable with staying here with him, I'm willing to go see if there's anything I can do for Alice."
Emmett crossed his arms and shook his head. "Jas, let me stay with her. I can protect her just fine, and I won't get confused and forget she's not a snack," he growled.
I felt Peter's chuckle as he responded. "Calm down, Big Guy," he laughed. "First of all, I fed this morning before I got here, so I'm not thirsty. Second, my craving for human blood gets sated on a regular basis. I'm much less likely to 'slip up' with her than any of you 'vegetarians' are."
Jasper clasped Emmett gently on the shoulder. "I would never put her at risk, Em. I know you're strong enough to protect her, but what if Edward walked in the door after I left? Then you're in a situation where you're torn between what Bella wants and what your brother wants, and I don't want you in that position. Peter will have no conflict. He'll make sure she's safe and doesn't leave this house until I come back, end of story." Emmett looked back at him for a long minute before silently nodding his head in agreement.
Jasper turned back toward me and knelt down again. "Are you still okay with this, Sweetheart? I won't go unless you want me to."
I reached out for his hand and smiled sadly. "Out of remembrance for the friendship Alice and I had, I want you to try," I answered honestly.
"Okay then," he replied. "Let's get this show on the road." He cupped my face with both of his hands and looked deep into my eyes. "I will be back before you go to sleep tonight," he promised.
"I know you will," I replied, trying to push my faith in him outwards. I was amazed that I really had no fear that he would abandon me for Alice. I knew the man in front of me would never betray me that way; he had earned my trust in every possible way and I had no reservations about his love for me.
Jasper shifted his gaze to Peter. "Peter, I…" He was cut off as Peter interrupted.
"You can tell me all about it when you get back, Jasper. I've waited this long, another couple hours won't kill me."
Jasper regarded him for a moment before nodding his head solemnly. "All right, but there's something else." He glanced over at me before continuing. "The last time I left her, someone took her and hurt her," he said quietly. "She is my Charlotte, Peter. Make sure she's here and safe when I get back."
Peter returned his gaze steadily. "I know exactly what she is to you, Jasper. She'll be right here waiting on you when you get back." Jasper nodded calmly in acceptance before standing up.
Shifting on Peter's lap, I winced as the movement hurt my ribs. Jasper's eyes narrowed as he noticed my pain and he turned quickly toward Carlisle. "Is there anything you can give her?"
Carlisle stood and walked over to a black messenger style bag. He pulled out several stacks of paperwork before holding up a small prescription bottle. "These are stronger than what she had yesterday," he warned. "After they kick in, they'll probably knock you out, Bella."
"That's probably not a bad thing," I admitted. "I didn't get much sleep last night." I accepted the pills from Carlisle and downed them quickly with the glass of water Esme handed me.
Jasper turned back to Peter. "She gets nightmares," he warned.
Peter just smiled as he settled me onto the couch and stood up to look at Jasper. "I'll chase the boogey man away," he answered calmly.
Jasper sat on the edge of the couch and I looked up into his beautiful amber eyes. I couldn't resist reaching up to brush his hair out of his eyes. The thought that he was going to walk out the door suddenly made my heart catch, and I felt a wave of anxiety.
His face grew concerned as he heard my heart pound. "Bella, I won't go if you're not sure," he began.
I shook my head and pressed a finger to his lips. "My head and my heart are both sure they want you to try to help Alice. It's just my body doesn't like the idea of you leaving," I said softly. "I'll be fine. Now get going so you can get back," I ordered gently. He leaned forward and gave me a sweet kiss before standing up and leaving the room at vampire speed, followed silently by the Cullens.
My heart clenched as I heard the car start and knew that Jasper was driving away from me, but I took a deep breath and tried to relax myself. Peter sat down on the couch and lifted my feet into his lap. I smiled at him as I allowed the tension to fully leave my body.
"So you eat people, huh?" I asked. I began laughing as his eyes widened at my bold question.
"You don't beat around the bush do ya, Darlin'?" he chuckled. "Yep, Charlotte and I eat people, although to be technical, it's really drinking!" He winked at me before his face grew more serious. "We're real particular about who we hunt though. We stick to the type of people that society won't miss… criminals, drug addicts, sometimes suicidal or terminally ill people as well."
I nodded my head as I processed this information. It made sense, but one thought troubled me. "You say society won't miss these people, but most of them probably have family or friends that will miss them. And, who knows what these people would turn into if they didn't end up your dinner first. There's always hope for change," I insisted.
He sighed and took my hand. "Everything you just said is true, Bella Bird," he admitted. "Nothing is free, Bella, nothing. When Jasper kills a doe, a fawn loses its mother and perhaps even its own life. When I kill a criminal, there's a chance he has a mother at home who will miss him for the rest of her life. There's also the chance that if he lived he would reform and solve world hunger. But the long and short of it is, I am what I am, and I kill to survive. I won't try to convince you that I'm a good person, but I'm doin' the best I can with the situation I'm in. Jasper's chosen his way to get by, Char and I have chosen ours."
I squeezed his hand back and leaned back against the couch. "I can accept that, Peter. As a human, I have to admit that I like Jasper's way better, but you're no monster either. You clearly admit the impact your actions have, which I respect."
He grinned at me as he released my hand. "Glad we can be friends, even with my diet," he teased. "Charlotte would be pissed if I scared you off before she gets to meet ya!"
"So, tell me Peter, where is your better half?" I demanded lightly, hoping to change the grisly topic.
He smiled sweetly, his face full of affection at the thought of his wife. "No worries, Little Bird. Charlotte's just workin' on getting' us a place to stay. I'm gonna help that boy of yours get all these messes straightened out, and then I'm gonna take ya'll down ta meet her."
His mention of cleaning up messes immediately brought my thoughts to Andy. I felt a wave of guilt and anxiety; I had been so wrapped up in Jasper, my injuries, and seeing the Cullens again that I hadn't even thought of Andy until now.
"Now what's makin' your little heart pound like that, Sugar?" Peter asked, his concerned tone belying the lighthearted words.
"It's my friend Andy," I explained. "He was hurt by the same guys that took me, and I don't know how he is, or even where he is." I chewed my lip anxiously. "I can't believe I didn't think to ask Jasper before he left. I won't be able to stop worrying about it until he gets back," I sighed in frustration.
Peter reached into his pocket and pulled out a cell phone. "Well, why don't we do something ta put your fears to rest," he suggested. "I'm assumin' Jasper's been usin' the services of our esteemed Mr. Jenks on this situation?"
I nodded my head affirmatively, and he pushed a button on his phone. I waited anxiously until he finally spoke into the phone. "How do, Mr. Jenks?" he began in a cheerful tone. "This is Peter Whitlock, Jasper's brother. I'm here with Miss Bella, and she's frettin' over how her friend Andy is doin', and I thought you might be able to fill her in." He listened intently for a moment before smiling. "Much appreciated, Sir. Here she is now."
He handed me the phone, and I spoke nervously into it. "Hello? This is Bella," I announced awkwardly. Jasper mentioned Jenks so frequently that I almost felt I knew him, but I had never spoken to him myself.
"Miss Swan," a polished voice answered. "So nice to hear your voice in person. I'm so glad you're safe again. How are you feeling?"
"I'm okay, thank you," answered. "Can you tell me anything about Andy?" I asked hesitantly.
"Of course," he answered easily. "He's in a safe place, fully conscious, and by all reports extremely pissed off. He'll be staying where he is until Mr. Whitlock gives me some further directions."
Mental pictures of a raging Andy worrying about me flooded my mind. "Does he know I'm okay, Mr. Jenks? He saw me getting hurt and he would worry about me."
There was a pause on the other end before he replied. "I'll make sure he's informed that you're safe and relatively sound, Miss Swan. I apologize for not thinking of it before."
"That's okay, Mr. Jenks. We've been keeping you pretty busy," I reassured him. "Thank you for everything you've done to help us."
"It's my pleasure, Miss Swan. I'll be in touch with Mr. Whitlock, unless there's anything else now?"
"No thank you; that was all I needed. Good-bye," I replied softly before handing the phone back to Peter.
"Feel better now, Bella?" he asked as he slipped the phone back into his pocket.
"Much better, thank you," I sighed as I sagged back into the couch. I could feel the pain medication beginning to kick in, as my movements no longer caused me to catch my breath and my eyes were starting to feel heavy.
"Why do I feel so connected to you, Peter?" I blurted out. Apparently my mental filter was being affected by the narcotics as well. "I don't even know you, but I trust you with my life, and not just because Jasper told me to."
His face lit up at my question and he looked eager as he shifted to face me better. "Well now, Bella, I can't answer that question for sure, but I have a theory," he began. "I've known for decades that Jasper's girl would be comin'."
My eyes widened at his words. "What about Alice, Peter? She was his girl until she decided to end it."
His expression grew sad. "I never thought Alice would be Jasper's forever, Bella. She saved him by bringing him to the Cullens and showing him a way to exist without being consumed by guilt, but they weren't compatible enough to be together forever. Their relationship could only survive by one of them sacrificing a huge part of their personality to allow them to get along. That person was Jasper, and while I know he loved her and was happy, it was also like a part of him was missing when he was with her."
I swallowed heavily as I saw the similarities between Jasper and myself. We had each had to give up our true selves in order to fit with the people we had loved. Peter gave me a knowing look before continuing.
"Now after she left him, it was even worse for awhile. He was lost without her constantly givin' him directions, but he was slowly pullin' out of it. Until," he paused, "you came along. I could hear it in his voice on the phone, he was back in the driver's seat of his life. He had something to do, someone to look after. Loving you has brought him back, and I can't thank you enough."
My fuzzy brain couldn't find the words to respond to his heartfelt thanks. He grinned as he realized I was getting loopy from the pain pills. "Now back to your original question, Miss Bella," he drawled. "My guess is that maybe our two souls are connected by Jasper. Maybe when two souls both love another one, they sort of recognize each other when they meet?" he postulated with a shrug.
"Peter, that is one of the trippiest things I have ever heard," I slurred out as my eyes drifted closed. I heard his small chuckle as I managed to keep talking. "I love you even though you're a crazy, philosophical fucker. Gonna take a nap now, 'kay?"
"You do that, Darlin'. I'll be right here when ya wake up." His voice sounded far away as I slid into a heavy morphine induced sleep.
I awoke sluggishly, struggling to break the hold of my drugged sleep. I was disoriented for a moment before I realized that Peter had carried me to the room I had slept in last night. He opened the door moments after I opened my eyes.
"How ya' feelin', Sleepy One?" he asked.
"Not sure yet," I muttered as I moved the covers aside to sit up. The pain upon moving was enough to make me gasp, and Peter was by my side instantly.
"Easy there, Bella. Let me help," he said calmly.
"Peter, as much as I love you already, I'm not ready for you to help me take a piss," I replied tartly. He laughed as he raised his hands up and backed away. "Just give me a second and I'll try again. It's probably better for me to start moving around anyway. I don't think my feet have touched the ground since Jasper saved me."
"Have it your way, Little Bird. Just let me know if you want help."
I finally managed to get myself into a standing position, but I had to lean heavily on Peter on my way to the bathroom. I shooed him out of the bathroom so I could pee in peace, and was proud of myself as I managed to walk out on my own when I was done.
I made it into the hallway independently, but gladly agreed to let Peter carry me down the steps. He settled me back on the couch and offered to find me something to eat. Feeling a little queasy from the medication, I declined and asked for a glass of water instead.
I picked up the remote and flipped channels absently while Peter thumbed through a book. My stomach remained upset and my ribs were really starting to hurt. To top it off, I was starting to feel anxious about how Jasper was doing and how Carlisle and the others were treating him.
"What's eatin' ya now, Bella?" Peter asked nonchalantly as he looked up from his book.
"I don't feel good and I'm worried about Jasper," I admitted frankly as I turned the TV off.
"He can handle himself just fine, Honey. What are you worried will happen to him?" He seemed quite interested in my concern, his red eyes piercing mine intently.
"I just worry that Carlisle and the others will give him a hard time about what happened to me. None of it was his fault, but he already feels so guilty about it. He just doesn't need to pick up any blame from them too."
Peter put his book down and walked over to me. "You just keep holdin' on to him, and he'll come out fine," he said softly. "You're real good for him, Bella, and with time, you'll help him get past all the guilt he carries around. Now stop worryin', 'cause he'll be walking in the door in about …," he trailed off as we heard car doors close outside.
"I'd make that about three seconds," he chuckled as the front door opened and Jasper materialized in front of me. In the next instant, I was wrapped in his arms and cradled on his lap. I snuggled into him, breathing in his scent and relishing the feeling of him pressing his face into the top of my head.
"How did it go?" I whispered into his chest.
"Not good," he sighed into my hair. "I wasn't able to help her at all."
"All you could do was try, Jasper," I said gently, able to see the guilt written across his face. I began to sit myself up, wincing as the movement caused a stabbing pain in my ribs. I couldn't hide my grimace from Jasper, and he peered down at me anxiously. "How are you, Sweetheart? Did you sleep any?"
His cool hand traced my face and I smiled softly at him. "I'm okay," I started to answer before Peter cut in, giving me a pointed glare.
"She slept about an hour before she got up and moved around a bit. She's a stubborn little thing and wouldn't let me help much, so she's feelin' it now. Her stomach's upset, and she hasn't been able to eat anything other than sippin' on a little water."
Carlisle approached us immediately, gently moving my head to look into my eyes. "You're starting to look a little dehydrated, Bella. Do you think you could try to drink some more?"
"Maybe a cup of tea, if you have it?" I suggested hesitantly.
"Of course, Dear," Esme answered quickly as she rushed into the kitchen.
"We picked up a different pain medication that will be easier on your stomach. You can take it in about an hour," Carlisle said as he finished looking me over.
I thanked him and let Jasper carry me into the kitchen. Within minutes I was sipping my tea and even nibbling on some toast as my stomach settled. Esme sat at the table with me and we chatted idly about trivial things. I longed to return to the days when I would have confided my deepest thoughts and fears to her, but I just wasn't there yet.
Peter and Jasper were alone in the living room, having a conversation I couldn't hear. My guess was that Jasper was filling Peter in on recent events. Sighing, I ran a hand absently through my hair and cringed at the greasy feel of it. Jasper caught my expression and immediately tensed up.
"What's wrong, are you hurting again?" he demanded as he walked into the kitchen.
I smiled at him as I shook my head. "Relax, Whitlock. Just wishing I could wash my hair, that's all. I'm so gross, I don't know how you're tolerating being in the same room given your super vampire sense of smell. I just don't feel up to standing in the shower right now though." In the next instant, I was in his arms being carried upstairs. "What are you doing, Jasper?"
He smiled down at me as we entered the bedroom. "Your wish is my command, Sweetheart. We're gonna wash your hair."
JPOV
Turning away to leave Bella was one of the most difficult things I had ever done in my long life. I knew she was in Peter's safe hands, but I still felt anxious about walking away from her, especially when she was still in pain. The anxiety the others were feeling about Peter was amplifying my own tension, and I really felt on edge.
I forced my feet to keep moving forward out of the house, following Emmett to his huge Jeep and climbing into the passenger side. Carlisle and Esme sat in the back and Emmett pulled out of the driveway.
"We're only about fifteen minutes away," he mentioned. "She and Rose are at our place while Bella's here."
"So what exactly has been going on with Alice?" I asked tersely, glancing back at Carlisle.
"Her condition varies a lot, Jasper," he answered, a wave of sadness following his words. "She has days where she acts relatively normal. Then out of nowhere she'll snap into a catatonic state, which is always followed by manic behavior. The last two weeks have been particularly bad. She's been in a state of constant agitation."
I felt my own wave of sorrow for the condition of the woman who had shared my life for so many years.
Esme's soft voice chimed in from the back seat. "She's so lost, Jasper. We have to take her out and coax her to hunt. Someone has to be with her constantly, we're so worried she'll snap and attack a human. I really hope you can help her."
I met her sad eyes as I answered, "I'll do everything I can, Esme."
Emmett stopped the Jeep in front of a charming log cabin tucked into a secluded valley. The front door opened and Rosalie walked out to meet us. Emmett rushed to meet her and I smiled as they embraced sweetly after their separation.
I got out of the Jeep and walked over to them. "Thanks for coming, Jasper," Rosalie whispered as I gave her a quick hug. "She's inside. I told her you were coming, but she didn't react at all." I followed Emmett and Rose inside, Esme and Carlisle immediately behind me.
I took in the sight of Alice sitting in an oversized chair that dwarfed her and gasped. Her gaze was fixed in front of her and she made no sign of recognition as we approached her. Her demeanor resembled the way she acted when she was having a vision, only much more severe. "She's been like this for three days now," Rose whispered behind me.
She was dressed simply in a t-shirt and tights and her hair was disheveled rather than its normal perfect spikiness. It made my cold heart clench in my chest. The Alice I had known and loved would never have allowed herself to be seen like this. She remained motionless except for her eyes, which moved rapidly side to side, passing over me as if I wasn't there.
I knelt in front of the tiny woman who had been my wife. Her emotions struck me like a barrage of bullets. Despair, anger, desperation, and fear flashed over her in rapid, random sequence. Her eyes flickered as if she was watching something we couldn't see. "Hello, Alice," I said quietly. She made no sign that she heard my voice. "I came to see how you're doing."
Her lack of reaction to my voice left a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach. I had never seen a vampire in this condition. I had encountered many crazy vamps in my violent past, but they had been rapidly dispatched once their usefulness was finished. A catatonic vampire was completely outside of my experience, and I felt real fear for her. All of the thousands of drugs humans had developed to treat such a condition were useless to us, unable to be absorbed by her vampire anatomy.
I sighed and centered myself, closing my eyes and picturing Bella to ease my own anxiety. I attempted to push a wave of calm over Alice. I was unsurprised when it had no effect, almost as if the peace I was sending her dissipated on contact with her. Fighting my growing sense of failure, I tried speaking to her for several minutes, but she never reacted or acknowledged me.
I slowly reached out to take one of her small hands in mine, hoping that the physical contact would amplify the effect of my gift. Feeling the love and hope from the others in the room, I focused on pushing those emotions into Alice, imagining them traveling between our linked hands. Again, she didn't react, and her own emotions didn't change. "I'm so sorry, Alice," I said quietly as I stood up to walk away.
As I turned, I saw the disappointed faces of the others. My own sense of failure was multiplied by their sadness. I forced myself to push through the strong emotions and met their eyes. "I'm sorry. My ability isn't reaching her. I wish there was something else I could do."
"Thank you for trying, Jasper," Carlisle answered softly. "We knew it was a long shot."
I just nodded shortly and walked out of the small home to the Jeep, eager to get back to Bella. I felt a profound feeling of sadness, both my own and the Cullens, and I knew being around Bella would help me pull out of it.
We made a quick stop to pick up the pain medication Carlisle had ordered for Bella and headed back to Esme and Carlisle's home. Emmett laughed drily as I opened the car door before the Jeep was parked. I ran into the house and followed the sound of Bella's heart to the living room.
I gently picked her up and settled her in my lap, allowing our sense of peace to surround me as she nestled her face into my chest. She reassured me with words as well as with her touch and I began to feel better. I still felt sad at my inability to help Alice, but the raw edge was gone from the feeling.
When she moved, I could tell she was in pain. She tried to deny it, but Peter jumped in and filled me in on how she had done while I was away. Stubborn little thing is right, I thought to myself as Carlisle moved in to take a look at her.
We took a few minutes to get her settled in the kitchen with Esme before Peter and I returned to the living room. He took a look at me and shook his head.
"I leave the continent for two months, and look what a mess ya get into," he drawled out with a smirk. "Ya finally find your girl, but not in time to keep her from getting neck deep into trouble."
I shook my head wryly at him. "She really is a danger magnet, Peter. You don't understand, trouble follows her."
"So fill me in on exactly what happened while I was gone," he demanded as he relaxed back on the couch. I complied, speaking quickly and quietly as I described how Bella and I had met and everything that had happened since then. He spent a lot of time grinning as he listened until I relayed the story of her kidnapping and my struggle at the hospital.
"I didn't think I would make it out of there, Peter. There was no way I was going to stop myself from draining someone. I knew it would mean exposing her to the Volturi, but I knew I couldn't stop myself. I still don't understand how I did it, but somehow I did it."
"Ya did it with her, idiot. You let her in and allowed her to be what you needed, and it worked. Ya'll are one of those 'sum is greater than the parts' situations."
As he spoke, I glanced at Bella and noticed she was grimacing. "What's wrong, are you hurting again?" I asked as I approached her. She smiled at me and told me that she wanted to wash her hair. Without a second thought, I swept her up into my arms and headed up the stairs, laughing at her startled confusion.
I could tell she was still nervous in my arms, so I reassured her. "Relax, Sweets. I'm gonna run you a bath. I promise I'll do all the work; it won't hurt a bit."
She smiled sweetly and relaxed as I walked into the bedroom we were using and sat her gently on the bed. I went into the bathroom and started the water running in the oversized tub. I pulled out soap, towels, and shampoo from the supplies Esme had provided.
When the water was the perfect temperature, I returned to the bed and picked Bella up, being careful not to jostle her. I carried her into the bathroom and sat her on the vanity seat, helping her carefully out of her battered t-shirt and jeans. She wrinkled her nose as I tossed them aside.
"I think we need to burn those," she said in disgust. "I never want to see them again."
"I'm sure you can borrow something from Esme until we can pick you up something new," I replied as I knelt in front of her to help her out of her undergarments. The sight of the livid bruises covering her chest and abdomen made my cold heart clench.
"My poor, Sweet Girl," I sighed as I leaned in to press a kiss against her ribs and she gently held my head close. "I'm so sorry I let them hurt you." The memory of her lying on the floor fighting to stay conscious overwhelmed me. I began to run my hands along her arms and legs, trying to remind myself that she was alive and would heal.
Bella gently pulled my head up to look at her. "Jasper, you have to let this go," she said gently as she ran her fingers through my hair. "It wasn't your fault. You saved me. I hurt right now, but I will heal. I am sitting here alive because of you. I love you," she sighed as I stood and lifted her to carry her to the tub.
She stiffened as I sat her into the water, but she relaxed as the warm water soothed her muscles. I whipped off my clothes and stepped in to sit behind her, pulling her gently back against my chest. Unfortunately, the feel of her ass against my dick gave me an immediate hard on, and I felt her shake with laughter before she braced herself against the pain.
"Sorry, Jasper. Don't think I'm in shape for bathtub sex yet," she teased as she took my hand in hers.
"I know, Baby. I'd tell you it'll go away, but I think you'll just have to ignore it. You naked equals me hard, I guess."
She giggled sweetly and ran her hands along my forearms. "We'll just have to repeat this in a week or two," she murmured as she closed her eyes.
"That's a date," I whispered as I grabbed the soap and began to lather it. I used my hands and carefully washed her, closing my eyes and relishing the sensation of her warm, soft body under my hands. I was thorough, but careful not to linger anywhere that would tease her. She was in no shape for any sort of sex, and I didn't want to make her think I was hoping for any action.
After I washed her, I shifted her to the side and reached for the convenient hand sprayer to wet her hair, being careful to avoid her face. I poured a generous amount of shampoo into my hands and worked her long hair into a thick lather. She sighed contentedly as I massaged her scalp and used my fingers to untangle the knots.
"Heaven," she moaned as I moved my hands down to her neck and shoulders, keeping the pressure soft and soothing. When I noticed the water was cooling off, I used the sprayer to rinse her hair out and carefully lifted her out of the tub. I dried her quickly with one of Esme's luxurious towels so she wouldn't get a chill before wrapping her up in a fluffy robe and sitting her on the vanity stool again.
I dried myself off and dressed again using vampire speed before returning to her. I pressed a kiss against her lips as I reached for the hairbrush on the vanity. "I'm so glad you're sitting here in front of me, Bella. In my long life, I've never felt such fear as I did when I knew they had you," I said softly as I turned the stool and began to comb out her wet hair.
She looked at me through the vanity mirror, her brown eyes full of emotions I couldn't feel. "I wasn't afraid at all, Jasper. I knew you would come for me; all I had to do was hang on long enough. Even in the hospital when you were so close to losing control, I wasn't afraid. I knew that I had to keep you from hurting someone or the Volturi would take you from me, so I just pushed the fear away and put my faith in you. Both times, you came through, just like I knew you would, Jasper Whitlock."
I turned her slightly to reach the other side of her head. The harsh bathroom light struck the greenish bruise on her face. Tracing the bruise softly with one finger, I whispered to her. "I look at your beautiful body covered in bruises, and it makes me ill. I would give anything to be able to take your pain into me instead."
She moved her face to press a kiss into my palm. "I know how you feel," she sighed. "When you were in so much pain at the hospital, I would have done anything to take it away. But," she continued cautiously, "I want you to let that go. I hate seeing the guilt on your face every time I wince. I'm starting to feel guilty for making you feel guilty, and we need to step out of the downward spiral. It hurts, but you being here with me makes it worth it. I love you, Jasper."
I knelt in front of her and kissed her reverently. "I love you too, Sweetheart." The thought that my guilt was starting to affect her snapped me right out of my pity party. I needed to stop regretting what I hadn't done to keep her safe and concentrate on helping her feel better. "I'm done with the guilt now, I promise."
Her beautiful face lit up with a peaceful smile. "Good," she whispered. "Now let's go cuddle."
"Your wish is my command," I teased as I whisked her back into the bedroom and got us situated in bed. We held each other silently, just enjoying the contact. I ran my fingers through her hair as it dried while she traced the scars on my arm with a fingertip.
I heard Peter's footsteps as he approached the door. "Can I break up this love fest, or do I need ta come back later?" he cooed as he stepped into the room.
"Come on in, Asshole," I smiled as I nodded toward the empty chair. He dragged it over to the bedside and took a seat.
"Ya sure smell pretty, Little Bird," he teased Bella as I felt her blush in my arms. "Feelin' any better?"
"Yep'," she replied. "Having clean hair has a definite analgesic effect on me."
I gently shifted us so that we were lying on our sides facing Peter, my arm draping over her little body as she snuggled into me.
"Glad ta hear it, Darlin'. I was hurtin' for ya for awhile down there." He shifted his gaze to me. "Now, why don't ya fill us in on what went down with Alice," he suggested. "Little Pixie and I never got along great, but I hate to hear she's in a bad way."
I explained Alice's condition and lack of reaction to anyone, struggling against the guilt that was trying to rise up again in me. "I've never seen anything like it in a vampire. It was awful."
Bella linked our hands together before bringing them up to her mouth for a gentle kiss. "You did everything you could, Baby. We'll think of something else to try," she said in a soothing tone.
Peter rolled his eyes at me. "Anything else you'd like to take responsibility for while you're beatin' yourself up for stuff that's not your fault, Jasper? Global warming, third world poverty, or the Linbergh baby, maybe?" he drawled out.
I glared at him as I answered. "I know it's not my fault that I couldn't help Alice, Peter. It's just hard to see someone I cared about in that condition."
We looked up as Carlisle entered the room. "I brought you the new medication, Bella. It'll still make you drowsy, but I don't think it will bother your stomach."
"Thanks, Carlisle," she said as she swallowed the pills with water. She asked me to help her into the bathroom so she could change into pajamas and finish her night time routine. I immediately complied, returning to the bedroom while I waited for her to finish.
"Jasper, I couldn't help but overhear your conversation," Carlisle began, as we all laughed shortly. Privacy was impossible in a house full of vampires, and you either learned to live with it or you lived on your own. "I hope you don't feel guilty about Alice. We're all so grateful that you were willing to try to help, despite how your relationship ended."
"I'll always care about her, Carlisle. She helped get me to where I am today, and that will always mean something. It broke my heart to see her that way."
I heard Bella's footsteps and stood up to meet her at the doorway. I moved to lift her, but she shook her head as she began to walk across the room. She leaned heavily on me, and by the time we reached the bed, she was shaking with fatigue and pain. I settle her down in bed and tucked her into her favorite sleeping position.
She fought a yawn as she shifted around gingerly. "You know, what we need is a vampire whisperer," she slurred out. I smiled down at her, realizing the pain med was kicking in and making her goofy. Peter and Carlisle looked confused, and she quickly elaborated. "You know, like that dog whisperer guy. The dog is all crazy and barking and everything, and then he comes in and two minutes later the dog is sitting at his feet, completely calm. We need that for Alice," she said enthusiastically. "Aren't there any vampire shrinks around?"
Carlisle shook his head in amusement as he walked out of the room, but I noticed Peter's eyes light up and felt a flash of hope from him. "What is it?" I demanded quietly as I listened to Bella's heart slow into a peaceful rhythm.
"Little Bird, ya just gave me an idea," he muttered as he watched her eyelids drift down.
"That's good," she mumbled, her eyes still closed. "Let me know if you have any other problems you need solved tomorrow."
"Good night, Silly Girl," I whispered as she drifted into sleep. Turning my attention back to Peter, I gave him a hard glare. "What has you so hopeful?" I asked in a vampire whisper.
He shook his head. "Just remembered somebody I ran across once that might be able ta help Alice," he said somberly. "I'll have ta make a few calls and see if I can track the guy down. I'll let ya know more if I make any headway. But before I do that," he continued, his expression and tone dead serious, "tell me how we're gonna take care of those fucks that hurt your girl."
I flashed him a deadly smile and we whispered plans until Peter excused himself to start making phone calls about his vampire whisperer. After he left, I snuggled into Bella, wrapping myself around her as tightly as I could without hurting her. This tiny, strong woman was the center of my universe, and I was never going to let her go.
AN- Wow, everybody! Just, Wow! I was blown away by my record number of reviews last chapter! Thank you all so much! I would never slow down or hold material in exchange for reviews, but the awesome response really motivated me, and I really did write faster, hence the quick update!
My Dear MM, how do I love thee? Let's see, what a week! Thank you for letting me scream and then fixing the problem, thank you for "holding my hand" while I cry for a stranger, thank you for knowing when I need kisses and when I need spanks. You are just a great friend.
I found a fic I'm obsessing over. Through Dominant Eyes by tench11. She's just getting started, but I am predicting big things for this one! Check it out and leave her love!
Have a safe and happy Independence Day to all my friends here in the USA! Please don't drink and drive!
Love to you all!
heavyinfinity