A/N: Happy belated Bonfire Night (though I don't actually celebrate it myself)!

Disclaimer: I own nothing but this slice of insanity e_o

Chapter 5: The Boy King

With a muffled grunt, Matt fell to his knees.

Upon his capture, the accused tomb raider had been stripped of all his clothing, including the ribbed boots on his feet to the plastic goggles that eternally adorned his head. His sore wrists had been bound behind his back, strapped together by a knotted leather cord. A blindfold was also currently drawn across his eyes – but even in his sightless condition, Matt could sense a familiar, simmering presence next to him on the stone floor. It was, without a doubt, Mello.

The redhead shivered, although he was far from cold. In fact, sweat was pouring from practically every pore of his naked flesh. The three men and their Egyptian captors had been walking for at least two hours aboveground, beneath the scorching sun; Matt had never endured such physical suffering in his entire life. His makeshift bandages, which had been fortunately left intact after being inspected, were now drenched in a mixture of perspiration and congealing blood.

Like Mello and Near, Matt had wisely stayed silent during the lengthy trek through the desert. He had ignored the burning pads of his bare feet, instead focusing on the thrumming of his heart against his ribcage. Admittedly, Matt was out of shape. If they were to get out of this alive, the redhead silently vowed, he would spend more time working out instead of gaming the nights away like a chronic couch potato.

"Your Highness, these three are the ones behind the disturbance over in the Kings' Valley!" a deep voice boomed above his head.

Matt gasped when the darkness was suddenly ripped from him.

Countless tapestries plummeted from the high ceilings like multicolored waterfalls, veiling beneath them the smooth yellow bricks of the palace walls. Pole torches burned in every corner of the great chamber, dousing the area in a healthy orange light. There was only one door in the room – a giant archway – and no windows.

Near kept his eyes trained on the tiled floor, blank and void of any expression despite the sprawl of gaudy animal paintings that decorated the glossy squares. Mello, on the other hand, seemed rather impressed by their surroundings…

…more specifically, by the commanding figure that sat hunched in a splendid golden throne at the front of the room.

The king appeared to be a boy of their own age, no more than eighteen or nineteen years old. His skull was completely hidden underneath an elongated helmet – no, a crown – striped with gold and indigo. A tiny bejeweled serpent jutted out above the boy's smooth, tanned forehead. His eyes, which were ringed with long lashes and dark makeup, scanned the scene before him. The reigning teenager calmly lifted his chin.

Matt felt a tremor of awe ripple through his body. No…

No fucking way…

"They were found breaching the secret tombs," the leader of the royal guards continued, shooting daggers at the trio. "They must be executed at once."

"You have done well, General Horembeb. Please leave us now. I would like to talk to them alone."

The boy's voice was soft and velvety, as though he was speaking to a lover or a child. An alarmed scowl flashed across the older man's features.

"I am afraid I cannot do that, Pharaoh. These men are extremely dangerous. Look at their outlandish appearances! Abominations! Punishments for rebelling against the gods!" Horembeb yanked handfuls of Matt's red hair and Mello's flaxen locks; another man brutally pinched Near's pale skin.

The young king looked amused. "What other proof do you have?"

In response, a silver-plated pistol and a black game console skittered onto the tiled floor. Matt flinched at the loud landing impact of his favorite electronic device. Near's socks and pajama pants quickly followed, along with Mello's leather ensemble and Matt's own bizarre attire. His eyes widened; his goggles were missing, as well as Mello's rosary.

General Horembeb nudged the pile of supposedly foreign objects with a sandaled foot. "The high priests have been unable to identify their possessions. However, one of them suggested that they are gypsies. Another is convinced they are spies from a distant land, or… rogue magicians."

Matt tensed as a buzzing murmur echoed through the chamber.

"Thieves!"

The redhead recoiled from the unexpected shout that exploded from Mello's mouth. Near also looked appalled.

In the blink of an eye, ten sloping blades were at the blond's throat.

"Where is my necklace?" Mello snarled, despite being seconds away from a bloody decapitation.

"If you are referring to the rubies you stole from the tombs, we have confiscated them," a guard said maddeningly. His partners nodded in agreement, and one of them lashed out with a leg to kick Mello in the gut. The blond doubled over in silent pain, and Matt instinctively reached out to comfort him.

"That is enough! Withdraw your weapons!"

The boy-king cast his guards an expectant look. They snapped to attention and swiftly sheathed their swords. "Your Highness…"

"Out, now. That is an order. And please fetch my wife and Grand Vizier Ay. That is also an order."

Muttering incomprehensibly, General Horembeb and his men swept out of the chamber, their black robes swishing behind them as they made their exit.

"Get up."

The trio of cultivated geniuses obeyed. Matt was impressed by his younger companion's serenity; he himself was a shuddering mess. Mello was also trembling, but it was obviously out of fury rather than fear.

"You must be cold. Put these on," the youthful pharaoh said quietly. Three cloaks sailed through the air and landed gently at their swollen, dirty feet. "I apologize for your less-than-warm welcome into Thebes."

Matt's breathing grew shallower with each lungful of air. He snatched the clean cloth from the ground, grateful to shield his extremities from sight.

Thebes…

This man…

"Why are you giving us such special treatment?" Near asked bluntly, unabashedly ignoring the robe lying on the floor.

The king looked apologetic. "Because I am the one responsible for your ill-timed fate," he declared, climbing off the throne and drawing himself to his full height, which appeared to be an inch more than Matt's own. Almost immediately, the boy grabbed his back and became hunched over once again.

"What are you talking about? Who are you?" Mello growled.

The young man looked surprised by the question.

"Why, I'm Tutankhamun, of course."

A/N: A bit of trivia – King Tut had a "mild case" of scoliosis. Like L, perhaps?

Special thanks to the latest reviewers: Kira the Wolf, akatsukifan (haha, they're safe for now!), Kishimojin, Sailormercury117 (heh, thanks! It's based on a lot of history so it's understandable it might get a little confusing)

Seeing as mummies are actually wanted, reviews will keep the…scarabs?... away! xD