AN: Okay, I just want to say I'm really sorry about making this so sad…I'm not trying to torture you or make you sad, I promise! And I'm not dragging out Chuck's sickness to punish you or anything…I just think it'd be mean if I was like "Chuck's sick" and then in the next chapter "Chuck's dead." So…it will take a little bit. If that's even what's going to happen.

Chapter 8

When I wake up, I roll over to find Chuck gone.

All that's left behind is a note.

I'm sorry. But I can't stay here. And neither can you. You know why I didn't tell you about this, and so you must understand why I can't let this continue between us.

-C

I stare, horrified, at the note in my hand. He's gone? No. He cannot have done this to me. He wrote that I would understand, and I guess a part of me does. I know that he wants to protect me from the truth. But it's too late. I already know. And I want to, no, I need to be there for the remainder of his life. Because I can't imagine being anywhere else.

I need to find him. Why doesn't he understand that I need him? I already can't imagine losing him…and now I've lost him even sooner?

I'm starting to breathe very fast and I need to sit down. The last thing I need right now is a panic attack.

I need to calm down. I need to get everything organized. I start to list everything I know for sure in my head.

Okay, so first: Chuck is sick and could drop dead at any second. Well, no, that's not exactly correct. I don't believe he'd just drop dead. He would probably feel something first. Maybe he'd pass out, and then it would happen slowly? Would someone know to call the hospital, wherever he is? But there wouldn't be anything they could do. It makes me feel a little sick thinking about the different ways he could die, so I make myself stop.

Second: Chuck is gone. I have no idea where he is. I'm the last one to have seen him. Wait, no, that's not right either. The man at the front desk probably saw him, right? I can ask him! Or maybe he's talked to his doctor…but how can I talk to him? I don't know his number…maybe I can find it in Chuck's room?

There's not much else I know. I'll have to start with asking the man at the front desk, but I'm guessing that Chuck had left in a hurry. He probably didn't talk to anyone on his way out. He may not have even been noticed by anyone at the hotel.

He's run away before, many times. One time that sticks out in my memory right now is when he left after his father died. He showed up at my mother's wedding, and then we fell asleep together, just like last night. And he left a note then, too. The times are very, very similar. But back then, I just wanted Chuck back so that he could cope with his feelings, because I missed him, and because I was worried about him. But now, if I don't get Chuck back soon, it might mean that I'll never see him again.

And I can't handle that.

I can't do this alone. But I don't call a PI to help, or the front desk.

I call Serena.

"He's gone," I say when she picks up.

"What?"

"He. Is. Gone." I say again.

"Wait, Chuck? Where?"

"I don't know! I just woke up and he was gone!"

"Okay, okay, calm down. I'll be right there."

She comes over right away, and I meet her in the lobby after asking the man at the front desk if he's seen Chuck. He hasn't, as I expected.

I run to her when I see her, looking at her with pleading eyes.

"Please tell me you've heard from him," I say.

She shakes her head sadly. "He's not answering his cell phone, which I'm guessing you already knew."

I nod. "Serena, we have to find him! You heard him, he's barely got days left, and I can't do it, I can't let him leave without at least saying goodbye…"

"I know, B," she says, trying to console me. "We'll find him, I promise."

But she can't really promise anything. She doesn't know how to find Chuck. She doesn't know that even if we do find him, it won't be too late.

"Do you have any leads?" she asks me. "When you were sneaking around his hotel room, did you find anything besides that he was dying? If not, we can go back up there and look now."

I suddenly remember the pad of paper in my purse. I pull it out, revealing the names of all of the medicines Chuck is taking and the name of the hospital he went to recently from that hospital bill.

"Well, there's this," I say unhappily, showing the name to Serena. "But the hospital name is not going to help us. The doctors are not going to be able to give out any information on Chuck. There's not even going to be a way to bribe them, because I wouldn't be surprised if Chuck is paying them a lot of money to be even more confidential than usual."

"You're probably right," Serena agrees.

We go over to a couch in the lobby and sit down.

"Too bad Gossip Girl stopped posting things," I sigh.

"Why? She finally left us alone."

"Because she would probably have spotted Chuck by now. Or someone else would have sent a tip to her about where he's gone."

"Maybe…" Serena says. Then her eyes widen. "Wait a minute…you might be onto something, B."

"What do you mean? Gossip Girl is long gone."

"Not quite…" she says, her eyes lit up. "We're still being watched by the people who used to follow Gossip Girl. They want to know what we're doing. And I always get the feeling that Gossip Girl is still out there, well-informed about us…just refusing to post anything."

"Why would she do that?"

"Don't you remember her last post? When she boasted she knew a secret bigger that New York itself, but wouldn't tell us? Her credibility was wearing off then, and her gossip was getting kind of lame. It seemed like she might make her comeback with this big secret. But then she just posted and wrote that the secret was too big even for her and that it was up to the person to share it with the rest of their world if they chose to. And that she wouldn't post anything until, or unless they did."

"Yes, but she only said that because she was trying to make a comeback, saying that she had a huge piece of gossip, but she didn't really so she pretended she couldn't say it. Then she realized no one listened to her anymore and she stopped."

"But what if she wasn't lying?" Serena says. "I remember that before she posted that, she posted a single picture of Chuck coming out of a hospital. I didn't show it to you….I actually deleted it on your phone. I didn't want to worry you. I didn't think it was a big deal. She said that it was a false alarm for an overdose, or something like that, which, now that I think about it, was probably a tip Chuck texted her so that she wouldn't find out the truth. It was one of the only posts about Chuck since he got back from Prague."

"You deleted it from my phone?" I ask, a little angrily. "Serena, maybe if I had seen it I would've visited Chuck earlier, and I could have spent more time with him than I actually got to spend with him!"

"Blair, I was just trying to protect you, just like Chuck. Except it was a little different with me. I didn't think Chuck was in any real danger. I didn't want you to be upset, like you were every time Gossip Girl posted something about Chuck after he came back from Prague, even if there weren't many posts. And you wouldn't have gone to see him, because you wouldn't have believed that he was in any danger either."

I'm still a little mad, but she's right. I drop it.

"I'm just saying that the secret Gossip Girl knew might have been Chuck's secret," Serena explains.

"So…you're saying that there's still a chance Gossip Girl might know where Chuck is?" I ask.

"Yes! Gossip Girl is still keeping an eye on us, she knows Chuck's secret, and she's known it for much longer than us. Add that to the fact that her website is still up, and her email still works…I think it's a very strong possibility that she knows where Chuck is."

"But how would she be keeping tabs on him?"

"A lot of the people following Gossip Girl had never met us. But they got to know us through our scandals, as wrong as that is, and they felt like they knew us. When that was taken away from them, I don't think they just stopped thinking about us and our gossip. I'm guessing that they still send tips to Gossip Girl when they see us, hoping that she'll come back because her website's still up. Or maybe they're hoping they'll uncover the secret she knew themselves."

"That's a good theory, Serena. But I stand by what I said before. Gossip Girl isn't posting anymore. There's no way she can tell us where Chuck is, even if she knows."

"We can email her!"

"Please, S, she's not going to answer."

"You never know until you try!"

I shrug.

"Do you have anything better, Blair? Because Chuck is missing and if we ever want to see him again, this may be the only way! You really want to turn this down? Do you really want to just give up?"

"Of course not!" I say. "Okay, fine. Email her."

Serena looks a little smug as she emails Gossip Girl from her phone. I wonder how she can be so happy when all of this is happening with Chuck right now, but I don't think she can help it. She's usually cheerful. And she might be trying to make me feel better.

"Now what?" I ask.

"We wait," she says, but we don't have to wait long. Her phone beeps within minutes.

"Wow," I say. "Looks like Gossip Girl still doesn't have a life."

"And it looks like I was right!" Serena exclaims, opening the message. "Here it is, I told you she'd know!"

"Well, what did she say?" I ask, craning my neck to try to see the message.

"Room 12, the Mellar Motel, New York City."

"Ew, a motel?" I ask. "Why would Chuck be there? And why would he stay in the city? I expected him to get as far away as possible."

"My guess is because a gross motel in the city is the last place we'd check," Serena points out. "And one of the things Chuck and I talked about before you woke up was how he's hidden this from the press, and why. He needs to stay close enough to the hospital he's been going to if he wants everything to stay private. If he needs to go to a hospital, and he goes to a random hospital in a different state, someone is likely to see him there. He doesn't want this getting out. People would look at and treat him differently, and the company could be taken away from him, which is really the only thing he had left before you came."

"He told you all of that?"

"What he didn't say I could figure out myself."

"Wow, S, you're smarter than I give you credit for!"

I can't believe that she's figured all of this out. I couldn't have done it. But Serena's not dumb. I'm just surprised at how much thought she's put into this. But I guess things are just different when one of her friends is in danger.

She laughs. "And you're just noticing this?"

I smile, and then quickly stop.

"We should get going," I say. "Can you look up where this hotel is?"

"Got it," she says after a moment. "Let's go."

We head off to the motel, hoping that we'll be able to find Chuck soon.

AN: A short chapter, I know! Also kinda a filler chapter…don't you just hate those? I don't really like this chapter. But at least now they know where Chuck is…also, I modeled the texting Gossip Girl idea off of 4x11, so I don't own the idea or anything, I just thought it might fit here. Did it not make sense? Or did it fit? Let me know! Oh and sorry if this was too similar to Blair going missing a few chapters ago…well…I'll try to update soon! Please review!

Thanks for…

Reviewing: QueenBee10, awakeningezgi, HughLaurieLover (twice), Ami, ilovecujo1993, HnM skinnys, and Missyxo45

Story Alert: Molize, NathanJames23, tHe dAily ScRibbLeR, Toshiko00288, and jamieskib

Favorite Story: EmmaGrey and Toshiko00288

I don't know if it was just me or if there were less reviews this chapter…so please review!