Disclaimer: Not mine, all J.K.'s.

A/N: So, obviously we're getting deeper and deeper into the dark part of this story, what with there being trouble in paradise and what not. I hope this chapter makes up for the last one's end.

Chapter 34

March 1979

"Happy birthday," I whispered in Remus ear as I woke up to head off to work. We had a plan for that night, but my artist, my wolf, my love was not allowed to know about it. Lily had already asked him to hang out that afternoon, promising to have him back before dinner. He had been wary at first. To was his nineteenth birthday, and though it may not typically be one of the big ones, it was the day we had looked forward to for two years. After my own birthday at the end of this month, we would technically have the right to tell the ministry to kiss our asses. Not that we would, the headlines he had "quoted" in October still ran through my head, and I knew I had to continue on this path. Still, it was a good day. It was the day that my artist, my wolf, my love had been born.

"Don't go to work," he mumbled as his arms latched onto both Sirius, who was also waking up, and myself. We laughed, looked at the time, looked at each other, looked at our lover, and looked at each other. "Please," he whimpered, and my heart squeezed at the sound. I would give him anything he asked for, I had proven this, but I didn't think I could give him this. I wanted to, I wanted to stay in bed with him all day.

"I could probably get away with being a little late," Sirius said as he pressed on Remus' side, motioning for him to turn over. He did as our mutt asked, and that was it, I was done for, I'd be late, and I'd take the laps that my couch would order me to run. See, there are few sights that I think are as beautiful as my lovers' bodies lined up next to each other, naked and hard, the proof that they want me as badly as I always want them standing in front of me. When Remus flipped over, he pushed the covers away from our bodies, and that was the sight that I saw. So even if we were required to run laps, and actually run them, if we were late, I figured it was a price I could pay as long as I got to worship those bodies.

I was late, and I had spent the first hour of practice running, but the adrenaline that pumped through me after my early morning love making session gave me the strength to do it. As I was running I wondered if I should set our alarm for earlier, and make love to them before work every day. I had never had that much energy at practice, a fact that Fletch commented upon. I shrugged it off when he asked me what had put me in such a good mood, but the smile that broke out on my face every time I thought about it was unavoidable. Whenever I would mess up in practice, or when we had to do an exercise I wasn't very fond of, the memories of the morning would come back to me, and nothing would seem to have the power to get me down.

"Sirius get the cake," I shouted after the timer had stopped buzzing. I had never baked a cake before, and I had knots in my stomach saying that my lover's birthday party was a bad time to start. I was busy hanging up a banner, glad that Alice was there to watch over the cooking details. Sirius and I were doing the actual work, but we needed the supervision. Peter and Frank were also there to help hang the decorations. Peter was actually blowing up the balloons that were going to fill our flat. While Frank and I were putting a banner up that said "Happy Birthday Remus" on the wall behind the couch. Sirius came flying out of the bedroom that he had been cleaning, and pulled the cake out.

"Should we just use a charm to frost it?" Sirius asked when the cake was sitting on the counter.

"No," I answered, tacking the banner into the wall. "We have to let it cool first, and he says that magic makes food taste funky." I reminded him of a conversation we had had a few months back, Remus was teaching us how to cook now. We were awful at it, and I blamed the pure-blood status thing on that. We were useless without our wands, and really there were people out there that thought we were the best because of this fact. I wished I could challenge Tom to live in the muggle world for a week, he'd end up dead.

An hour later the cake was frosted, the meal was set out buffet style, and the guests were hiding behind the balloons. We didn't have a lot of furniture in our flat. That was why Sirius came up with the idea of buying way more balloons then should be legal, and charming the dining room and kitchen so that they stayed away from the food. We heard Lily and Remus talking outside the door about the movie they had gone to see while Sirius, Alice, Frank, Peter, and I prepared the party. There were a few chuckles, mainly from the Weasley's little ones, really our flat was not big enough for this many people, as the door slid open. The two youngest ones, the twins Fred and George, were shushed by the next one up, Percy, and after sticking their tongues out at him, fell quiet. Remus flipped the light on, and Lily stopped talking in the middle of a sentence, as we all shouted, "Surprise!" Remus stumbled backwards in his shock, before laughing. The look he shot us, made Sirius and I wonder what in God's green Earth possessed us to do such a stupid thing as invite over a bunch of people that didn't know we were lovers.

"Happy Birthday Moony," I said as he walked inside the flat, and Sirius and I pulled him into hugs we hoped looked more brotherly then they were. Peter quirked his eyebrow and smirked at us, and we wondered if we had succeeded in our goal. We backed away from Remus as others came up to wish him many more, and Peter chuckled at our fear of being caught. "It's good that you were able to get away from the store Pete," I said clapping a hand on his shoulder. "Means the world to him, I'm sure."

"I think you mean the world to him," Pete argued, and I just shook my head at the comment. Sirius ruffled Peter's hair in a big brother sort of fashion as he agreed with my comment. Peter smiled shyly at the attention, and nodded as though to say he wouldn't want to be anywhere else.

"Hey Birthday Boy," I called, and Remus turned around from where he was listening to Fred and George ramble about the event that had taken place that day to get them into trouble. We all had a fondness for the twins, probably because we could see ourselves in the little two-year-olds. They were going to be great pranksters one day. "Want to get over here so we can eat?" I asked as I waved one of the plastic plates in the air. He nodded and walked over to the table. Once again he gave me a look that made me want to forget who was all there and pull him into my arms for a birthday kiss. Thankfully we had dealt with those this morning, or I don't think I would have been able to wait. As he started down the table that we had magically put all the food we had made, and others had brought, the rest of our guests followed after him.

Soon we were all lounging around the balloon filled room, that Dumbledore had to magick so that we all actually fit, eating and laughing. I thought it was a little funny that Frank, Alice, Lily, Peter, Sirius, and I were sitting on or around the couch chatting. The Weasleys were separated into their own group in the corner, and McGonagall, Dumbledore, Hagrid and a few others were sitting at the table. Or well, the fully human ones were sitting at the table, Hagrid was standing beside it. Dumbledore had also magicked the roof to appear higher than it actually was. Members of the Order of the Phoenix were spread out all over our flat, and though we all seemed to be involved in our own conversations, we all joined into the others as well.

Sirius had thought about having some games available for the party, but I thought it was too many people in too tight a space for that. He agreed after I explained, and so all we had for the party was food and conversation. Not that our wolf would mind, Remus loved bonding with the people we regarded as our family. Frank and Alice had eventually worked out that something was a little peculiar about Sirius, Remus, and I's relationship, and we had told them. So when my hand brushed over Remus' knee they just laughed at the look he gave the rest of the room, just like Lily and Peter had done. With their chuckles, and the rest of the rooms' obliviousness, I squeezed his knee before moving back to the food I still had on my plate.

"Mr. James," Percy asked as he came to stand next to my knee. I smiled at the little one, as the rest of my group quieted down. "Sir, when are we having the cake?" He asked in the shy eagerness that only young tots can pull off. The rest of my group laughed, but I couldn't tell if that was at the cuteness of the little boy, or the surprised expression on Remus' face.

"You bought a cake?" He asked happily.

"No," I said, shaking my head. "We," I motioned between Sirius and myself, "made you a cake, chocolate, with chocolate frosting." I smiled, and raised my brow in an expression I hoped conveyed how excited I was for doing this for him. He gulped.

"I love you," he said, and chuckles already started through the room from the worried way he said it. "But, I don't want to die." My expression changed from excited to one that showed I was not amused.

"I'm going to force feed it to you." I said before tackling him, and Sirius held him down so that I could tickle him into submission. Fred and George saw us horse-playing, and all of the little ones quickly climbed onto the couch to help us torture the birthday boy. The older adults laughed at our antics, as the younger ones screamed as they hurried to get away. Sirius, and the two oldest Weasley children, Bill and Charlie held Remus down, as Fred, George, Percy, and I attacked our prey. Eventually he called out for mercy, and reminded us that there was cake, so we let him go.

"Happy Birthday to you," we sand as Sirius and I carried the large cake towards the coffee table that Remus was sitting behind. "Happy Birthday to you," the rest of the guests joined us in our song. "Happy Birthday dear Remus," we continued as we sat the cake down on the table. "Happy Birthday to you," as we finished the traditional lyrics of the song, and in one big breathe Remus leaned forward and blew out all nineteen of the candles. It was so very hard for us to keep the looks of lovers' adoration out of our eyes, but with a few clues from Peter and Lily, the rest continued to think our looks were nothing more then brotherly pride.

"It was nice of everyone to come," Remus said as he locked the door behind the last of our guests. We still had a third of the very large, very good if I do say so myself, cake. He sat down, I'd say between us, but it was more like on top of us as his legs dropped over Sirius, and his back used my legs as support. I handed him one of the forks in my hands to him, as Sirius reached over the birthday boy to cut the cake into three pieces and handed a plate to us. "Whoever taught you two how to cook must be a god in the kitchen." Remus mumbled as his eyes closed in bliss from eating the dessert.

"He's more like the god of the bedroom and the kitchen," Sirius corrected. "Though when he brings the kitchen to the bedroom, that is the best." I chuckled my agreement, thinking about the night when we had brought ice cream into our bedroom. Remus laughed at Sirius' comment, and dipping his finger into the frosting of his slice of cake, swiped it across Sirius' cheek. I laughed, though at the motion or the face Sirius made when he felt the chocolate trail running down his face I did not know.

"Oh," Remus said at the face, "what are you going to do about it?" He challenged with a raised eyebrow.

"Make you clean it up that's what," Sirius answered taking Remus' cake from him, and putting both of their plates on the table. I lifted my plate over my head as Sirius grabbed Remus, and pulled him to the ground where he could straddle our wolf better. He put his face next to Remus, the streak of chocolate the closest to Remus' lips, and order, "lick it." Remus didn't have to be told twice, leaning forwards he snaked his tongue across the path, cleaning it as best he could. Sirius kept up their game by dipping his own finger into one of the slices, and tracing it down Remus' nose. Leaning down he trailed his tongue from the tip of Remus' nose to the bridge where the chocolate trail stopped.

I laughed with them as I watched, Sirius dirty Remus with frosting, and make our wolf clean him. When Sirius let him have some freedom of movement, Remus started fighting back with his own chocolate mess that he took pleasure of cleaning. Eventually there was barely any frosting left though, but that wasn't stopping Sirius. He started tearing pieces of the cake off, and as he undid a button on Remus' shirt, he'd suck the piece of chocolate he had placed in the previous button's place. When he still had more than half of his cake left, and Remus' shirt off, he took torn up pieces and started marking patterns across our wolf's chest, and then leaned down to suck them off of him again. When he was finished with his cake, Remus changed their positions and did the same thing to him. I think Sirius moaned more than Remus had.

It was when they were finished, and I still had most of my cake left that I began to worry. The two most beautiful men I knew, were standing shirtless in my living room staring at me like I was a delectable morsel. I smiled back, and handing Remus my plate, laid down between them. They put the cake down next to me, and while Remus played the frosting game on my face, Sirius took chunks of the cake and played the chest one. I thought Sirius had moaned louder, but when I felt his lips and Remus' tongue against my skin at the same time, I'm pretty sure I made more sounds then either of them had, and they were louder.

We talked that night about everyday things, still things we hadn't talked about in weeks, but nothing deeper than "how's work." I was pretty sure that we wouldn't have even talked about that if we didn't have Frank and Lily pressuring us into talking. That thought helped my heartbreak, by adding to it. These were not only the people I loved sharing a bed with, but they were also my best friends, and outsiders had to force us to talk to each other. We had no plan, and even after months of trying to find one, it hadn't come. We were going to lose each other, and that was why we were finding new ways to show each other how much we loved them. Don't get me wrong, I loved being with them like that, I just wanted to know what they were thinking as well.

Over the next three weeks things just got worse as I had to start going to other teams' pitches for my matches. The team would stay in inns not far from our opponents pitches for two nights, that way we could get a feel for the pitch the day before the match, and play the day of. The first week had been awful, I don't think I slept at all as I longed to hold my lovers in my arms as I drifted into the dreamworld. The next week was better, and the next even better, as my body got used to the idea of not being with them every night. I hated that, I didn't want my body to get used to not holding them at all. If I could get used to it for a match what was to stop me from getting used to it so I could sleep with Lily?

The fourth week though I had a match at home, which was amazing. We played the Holyhead Harpies, an all female team. Those bitches...I mean witches, could play. I was impressed, and when I chanced to look at my lover who had once been my teammate, I could see that he was as well. A shout from Remus had got me out of the stupor that I had allowed myself to slip into when Sirius' and I's eyes caught with each others. I nearly lost to the Harpies, but somehow my team pulled together and we kicked their asses. After the match Lily came to join me and the team on the field, and Remus and Sirius broke my heart by going home long before I was allowed.

A/N: I giveth (as in the happy) and I snatch it away. Here have some more heartbreaking angst. Oh dear, will our boys be able to fix their messed up lives?