Shattered
Mmmm, yummyness is to come… no pun intended! XD I own not South Park, but I do own Nick! Well, my imagination owns Nick… DAMMIT! I own nothing!
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Nick sat in Kenny's final class in the seat beside the parka wearing blonde; Kenny found himself constantly hiding his laughter that all the girls were slowly falling over themselves to introduce themselves to Nick. Mainly because of how oblivious the innocent blonde was; it's what made him so attractive to them.
But, Kenny was kind of becoming irritated at, not Nick, but the girls; obviously, Nick wasn't going to be marrying them anytime soon. Chicks just never get a hint, do they?
"Nick, do you want to try to answer?" Kenny suddenly heard the teacher ask, glancing over to the wide eyed boy.
"Um, w-well, c squared would be twenty five so c would be five," Nick answered carefully. The teacher seemed almost stunned.
"Y-Yeah, that's right," he said, almost doubting himself.
"I would've never gotten that question before," Kenny whispered to the double.
"If I can solve it, so can you; you'd probably do even better than me," he responded, smiling reassuringly at the identical blonde. Now I see why the girls like him so much, he grinned. And, it was semi-true what he said; Kenny knew the shit he learned, he just didn't apply himself. And, the teacher never called on him so he never bothered. And, he never appeared for tests because he was always told when they were going to happen; letting him personally mark that day off to skip.
But, as he watched Nick become the teachers new favourite victim (that's what happens to smart asses), he figured Stan and Kyle were going to walk home today because Monday was study night. And, the smartest ass of the group was the Jew, which both Stan and Kenny happily took advantage of; course, Cartman would never let a Jew help him, even if it meant failing. The racist bastard.
Almost a half hour later, the bell finally rang, releasing them from the hell hole of math; Nick followed Kenny closely, feeling slightly uncomfortable from the attention the girls were giving him. He walked closely to Kenny, whispering in his ear, "Um, I think we're being followed."
"Of course we are, hot shot," Kenny snorted, smirking. "You're the most interesting thing that's come around in a long time; even if you were actually here this entire time."
"Stop it with the confusing paradox's," Nick pleaded, his voice slightly desperate. "Can we please just get out of here?"
"Sure, dude, we just gotta find Stan and Kyle; we're going to Kyle's for his computer so we can find the fuckers that did this to us," Kenny stated, his voice dropping dangerously. Nick gulped.
"Maybe revenge isn't the answer…" Kenny glared at his good side like he was an idiot.
"Those fuckers abducted us off the street, cut us in half slowly with a piece of wood and weights, and separated our personalities; I'd probably be a little more lenient if I had actually done something to make them want to kill me but, no. Plus, they're probably doing this to other people… People who die forever, separating their soul," Kenny hissed, before adding quietly, "Even if I don't do something about this as Kenny, Mysterion won't stand for this."
"B-But you can't know that!" Nick argued as they walked out into the cold, crisp Colorado air. "You figured out I was your innocence, right? Well, maybe I'm your conscience too."
"Conscience? Like, Jiminy Cricket and all that crap?"
"Y-Yeah, just… hear me out; what if I was that little voice in the back of your mind that gave you some kind of reason of guilt or something like that? Like, the only reason you haven't gone all homicidal on everyone is because I told you it was wrong or something…" Kenny shrugged.
"Sounds fucking crazy but guess that could be… Still, even before you were gone, I decided to kill those bastards; don't argue with that. I've never killed anyone else before, even though I've done a shit load of other crimes, so at least let me save others by killing those cultists," Kenny reasoned. "Anyways, we've gotta find them first, then fuck them up."
"I still don't think its right," Nick murmured.
"Don't worry then, because you're not going to have the blood on your hands," Kenny dismissed, waving at Stan and Kyle when he spotted them, jogging over.
"Even if you do it, I'll still be guilty," Nick sighed before catching up to his double.
"Ya, Kyle, I need to borrow your computer tonight," Kenny was asking as Nick walked in.
"What for?" the daywalker asked, emerald green eyes curious.
"I need to search porn and jack off," Kenny replied sarcastically. "What do you think? Just school shit, really."
"You have a science project, don't you?" Nick informed. Kenny gestured to him.
"What he said." Kyle shrugged.
"Alright, dude, you can be on the computer upstairs; Stan needs help with his algebra so we'll be downstairs. My parents aren't home and Ike's at a hockey game tonight." Ah, the little Canadian knows his heritage.
"Cool; swearing in the Broflovski house is such a fucking rare thing," Kenny stated blissfully. The super best friends chuckled and Nick smiled, amused.
"Looks like Cartman isn't coming today; let's just go," Stan said, starting off on the sidewalk when fatty didn't show. Uncaringly, the others followed, figuring Cartman had just gotten on the bus for home or something.
Little did they know, the large brunette was watching them from the distance, seeing everything through his own deluded perspective…
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Kenny stretched and yawned dramatically as he walked into the Broflovski residence, throwing his bag onto the couch as if he owned the place.
"Fucking awesome," he stated loudly, the words echoing as if daring someone to tell him off. When he was met with silence, he grinned at his friends walking in behind him.
"Coast is clear!" he notified cheerfully. Kyle rolled his eyes as he took off his jacket.
"Yeah, anyways, the heating is screwed up right now so you might want to take off your jackets," the daywalker stated as he hung up his own orange jacket. As Stan followed suit, Kenny and Nick glanced at each other nervously; they'd probably notice how identical they were if Kenny showed his face.
"Y-Yeah, guys, I woke up really late today so, unless you want me parading around your house shirtless," Kenny admitted truthfully as Nick took off his own jacket. Kyle shrugged, closing the door to keep in the heat.
"I was only saying, but you'll fucking roast in that," Kyle informed, walking over to the couch in his black t-shirt decorated with a skull and guitar. Stan followed, Nick smiling about them forgetting to take off the hats they always wore.
"Kay, we're heading up to your room; what's your password?" Kenny asked, Nick beside him in only the baggy jeans and white muscle shirt.
"Super best friends, no capitals and underscore between the words," he answered, pulling a blue math binder from his back pack.
"Heh, I know," Kenny smirked, running up stairs to avoid Kyle's unamused glare, Nick walking behind him. They approached their friends room, the 'No Canadians Allowed' sign a dead giveaway; Kenny walked in with a tired sigh, plopping himself in the desk chair. His double closed the door behind them and walked over to the bed, sitting on it.
"Wow, Kyle wasn't lying," Nick stated, sighing, "how are you not roasting in that jacket?"
"I've been through worse," Kenny merely answered, typing in the password and waiting for the computer to boot up. Nick gulped; was he referring to when he died?
"Nick, get your innocent ass over here," Kenny demanded with amusement. Said ass complied, kneeling beside the desk chair as Kenny pulled up an internet search engine.
"How are we going to find them, knowing as little as we do?" Nick asked, resting his chin on the desk to look up at the screen while Kenny drummed his fingers lightly. The blonde in the parka hummed thoughtfully, unsure.
"Well, they were a cult, and they separated souls," he stated obviously. "That much we know so let's try that." With that, he typed in the three words 'cult', 'separate', and 'soul', before hitting enter. "I doubt this'll actually work but at least we tried." He scrolled down through the pages, shaking his head.
"Purging, cleansing, reincarnating, even exercising the soul," Nick read.
"But no separating," Kenny added with a sigh. Nick looked up at his double, feeling a slight kind of pain when he saw the disappointment in his normally devious cerulean eyes; he tried to remember what he could quickly.
"Uh… W-Wait!" he exclaimed, remembering something. "They – They have to be in the Colorado area, or else they would easier to find, like, if they were famous worldwide." Kenny nodded.
"Cults in Colorado, huh? Worth a shot," he stated, typing it in and hitting enter. "Yeah, dude? Never use 'like' that way ever again." Nick looked up at him, the serious tone Kenny used worrying him.
"Why?" he asked. Kenny smirked.
"You sounded like a girl," he answered, glancing down at a pink cheeked blonde. Nick looked down, mumbling a sorry embarrassedly. Smirk growing into a grin, Kenny scrolled through the page again.
"Ah, here we go," Kenny stated, clicking a news article titled, 'Teens Continue to Disappear; Cult Activity Suspected'. "You can't be more obvious with a title like that." As the page loaded, Kenny sighed and wiped some sweat off his forehead; Nick laughed.
"And you've been through worse?" he asked, teasingly so as not to let Kenny think he's being insulted. With a chuckled, Kenny pulled the parka over his head, revealing his bare torso to everyone in the room; which would be Nick, whom flushed noticeably as Kenny flexed his muscles.
"Much better," he purred with a stretch before sitting upright again, trying not to smile at the flustered Nick who had casually put a couple feet of space between them. "Don't act so shy," Kenny added, more sensually than he intended, "I mean, we do have the same body." Nick, gulped, averting his eyes when Kenny grinned again, enjoying this little game.
But, he sighed, figuring he'd have to get serious sooner or later. He read the article closely, scrolling down and glancing at pictures before growling, "These are the fuckers."
"H-Huh?" Nick asked, glancing up at his shirtless double. "Y-You f-found them?"
"No doubt." At the curt reply, Nick gulped again and stood up beside Kenny to get a better view to read; his eyes widened as he read.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck," Kenny murmured before reading aloud, "It says, 'The teens missing are never found but, placed behind their homes are torture devices they suspect were used to kill them, due to trace amounts of blood. These torture devices are all labeled with the same mysterious insignia, although police aren't releasing what the insignia looks like to the public until they can confirm it was a cult; if it is, and if anyone is missing, specifically a teenager between the ages of fourteen to nineteen, that it calls' blah, blah, blah, whatever number they have. But do you know what this means?"
"It means that the thing that killed us is behind our house?" Nick said, questioningly.
"Probably, but what's weirder is that there are more than one type of torture device things," Kenny informed, looking at the given names. "Dunking Stool, Heretic's fork, and, oh god, the pear…" Kenny shuddered.
"What's that?"
"Trust me, you don't want to know," he insisted. "But that's probably why we couldn't find these jackasses before; they're just some assholes experimenting with theses things like they're fucking toys!"
"So, do you think it'll help when we get home to look around for the, er, torture device and look at this insignia?" the wide eyed blonde suggested. Kenny nodded, closing the window and erasing the web history before turning to get up; which knocked Nick's arm that was resting on the arm, making him fall onto Kenny's lap in a straddle position.
"Ack!" he gasped, recovering and face going red. "Ah! Sorry, sorry! The – The chair moved and I fell-,"
"Y-Yeah, it's cool," Kenny stated, though less composed than usual. "Just stand up and we can get home." The wide eyed blonde looked down, noticing that he was still sitting on Kenny in that provocative position; suddenly, he jumped up like he had gotten an electric shock, holding his hands up.
"Yes! Sorry Kenny!" he apologized again, backing away as if Kenny were going to scold him. Of course, the blonde wouldn't.
"C-Come on," Kenny spoke, struggling into his parka. "Let's just get home." With Nick still flushed, they walked down the stairs, Kenny mulling over ways to explain their appearance before halting at the bottom steps in paralysis; Nick almost walked right into him.
"Wha-?" the innocent blonde was about to ask until he looked around his double's shoulder face flushing further than it was already at what he saw; Stan and Kyle, supposedly 'studying', were deep in a lip-lock, Stan leaning over the red-head, hats discarded on the floor and hands tangled in hair passionately.
The two were still too deep in their kiss, having not noticed Kenny and Nick standing awkwardly at the bottom of the stairs; Kenny cleared his throat loudly. Kyle glanced over with half-lidded eyes that suddenly went wide, face flushing deep red as he gently but forcefully pushed Stan away, who was equally disheveled as him.
"Er, hey," Kenny started uncomfortably, "Well, we finished looking up our stuff so, y-yeah, we'll just be going. Sorry to interrupt and all…" At least I won't have to explain our red faces to them after that…
"W-Wait, guys!" Kyle called out as they got to the coat rack, Nick pulling on his blue jacket quickly. "Please don't tell anyone about this."
"Not yet, at least," Stan added, wrapping his strong arms around Kyle protectively. The Jew blushed in response, before looking back at the blonde duo.
"N-No problem dude!" Kenny insisted. "We're friends, aren't we?"
"What about Nick?" Stan asked. Nick nodded forcefully.
"I wouldn't dare; you guys are really good people and my… only friends," he promised before following the other McCormick out the door, leaving Kyle and Stan to do as they wished. They jogged a fair distance down the street before walking, an uncomfortable silence having grown in the air, air thick with sexual tension.
"W-Well, that was…" Nick started, though at a loss for words.
"Fucking awkward?" Kenny offered.
"Y-Yeah… very much so."
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Well, not exactly the yaoi yummyness I promised but we need suspense for this to happen, people. Yeah, nevermind, I was just making excuses; I'm kind of leading on the wholeness of epic plot I have right now so, ^^
Please note I was listening to Ievan Polka by Vocaloid that entire scene, giggling my fucking ass off the entire time! XD
And, also, thank you people who complied to my demand-, er order-, SHIT, I mean request – YES, that's the word – request for reviews. Your reviews make me happy! ^^
Little bit of an extra tidbit, I actually searched what Kenny searched, basically coming up with what he did, so the entire thing I blurbed there is completely made up. There is no torture sadistic cult in Colorado for all google will tell me!
And, even though I'll speak about it in the next chapter, the thing used on Kenny and Nick in their death is called the judas' cradle or just the cradle. Particularly frightening, I saw it on a show known as 1000 ways to die. Yeah, terrifying O.O
And, wow, this was long, I don't remember these things being so long, do you remember them being so long, if you even other to FUCKING READ IT… cause I don't ^^
Kay, Lexi out…