A/N: One day I update seven times and the next day only two. My bad. I hung out with some friends and performed at a coffee shop =) I think everyone will enjoy this chapter and get some laughs out of it. It's meant to be a very funny chapter. There is a little bit of seriousness in it but mostly comedy.

-First update of Dec. 30 at 3:55 am EST

Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi or its characters. Nor do I own any Playboy bunny magazines.

I'm not a light sleeper, nor am I a deep sleeping. I'm just a regular sleeper who doesn't wake up from quiet noises but when you're being loud I wake up.

"Yes! Yes! God Alex, yes!"

Someone make it stop.

"Uhhhh! Don't stop! Yes, right there!"

I just want to die right now.

"Oh my God! Yes! Yes!"

I turn over and look at Beth. She is completely knocked out. I am so jealous of her.

"Ooooh! YES!"

Ok, maybe it's over.

Ten Minutes Later:
"Fuck!"

Just when I thought it was over they start back up again. Luckily though Alex isn't as vocal as Paige. When it comes to Alex she usually just moans a lot, which I can still hear but it's not as bad.

"Ahhh."

And there's the moaning.

"Uhhhh! Ahhh!"

I grab one of the extra pillows off the floor and put it over my head. Maybe I can block out the sounds.

"Uhh! Yes! Ahhhhh!"

Ok I changed my mind, it is just as bad.

" I LOVE YOU PAIGE!"

And Alex is done. It's quite disturbing that I know when she's done. I also find it weird that Alex feels the need to declare her love for Paige when she… Well ya know.

You might be wondering what just happened. Well if you are wondering what just happened then you must be under the age of ten or have an IQ lower than 70, or you're just really naïve. But if you're older than the age of ten with an IQ of at least 70 then you know what just happened. You know what I just had to suffer through.

I've been going though this for nights now, ever since I got moved to the afternoon shift. You can now listen to me on Hot 101.5 Mondays through Fridays from 3pm to 7pm which means I'm now home most nights. It also means that I get to listen to the sweet sounds of Palex love making. I hope that from the tone of my voice you can tell that I am very disturbed, annoyed, and a little grossed out. I asked Beth how long this had been going on and she said pretty much since Alex got back from the hospital and I went back to work. I guess the broken arm didn't put a damper on Palex's love life. I then asked her how she slept through it and apparently after the second night she bought slipping pills that knock her right out. I'm thinking it's time for me to get some sleeping pills.

Although they've stopped I still can't sleep. The sounds are haunting me. They're haunting me when I try to go to sleep and they haunt me in my sleep! AHHH! I need a drink. No, not an alcoholic drink, more like some milk. I get out of bed and make my way downstairs.

I hate coming downstairs when it's late at night, it's really creepy. I turn on the kitchen light. I walk to the fridge and open it. Oh thank God we still have milk. I take the milk out of the fridge and turn around. Ahh!

"Oh my baby Jesus!" I yell and jump about ten feet into the air.

Alex just scared the living crap out of me.

She's looking at me weirdly. "What is wrong with you?" she asks.

"You just scared the shit out of me!" I yell. "Don't sneak up on me like that!"

"How can I sneak up on you when I have a bummed leg?" she asks while pointing to her leg.

Ok, she has a point.

"What are you doing awake?" she asks.

"Getting some milk," I tell her while pouring the milk into a glass. "I would ask what you're doing up but I already know."

A huge grin appears on Alex's face. I want to slap the smile off her face.

"Yeah…" she says like a little kid who just found a shiny new quarter. "We didn't wake you did we?"

I'm shaking my head. "Oh no, you didn't wake me," I tell her. "In order to be awoken you have to be a sleep first and I never had that chance of falling sleep."

Alex's smile disappears. "Oh, sorry aboot that."

"I don't understand why you and Paige just don't spend the night at her place. Why don't you just move in with her?"

"Because this is my home," Alex says. "Also we've only been together for two and a half months. Don't you think it's a bit soon for us to take the next step?"

I slam the milk carton down on the counter. "It's not like this would be your first times living together. Plus Paige is here ALL the time. She has pretty much unofficially moved into this place."

"Ok ok," Alex says. "We'll keep it down next time."

Oh yeah, because that makes it soooo much better. I'm looking at Alex with my eyebrow raised questioningly.

"Was there a reason you came down here?" I ask her.

"Oh yeah," Alex says, remembering why she came down here. "I need a bottle of water."

Alex hobbles over to the fridge and grabs a bottle of water out of it. Alex opens the bottle and takes a swig from it. She's smirking at me.

"I really needed that," she says smugly.

"Leave now before I do something that makes you cry out 'Help! I've fallen and I can't get up!'."

Alex frowns at me. "Someone's grumpy when she's tired."

Oh really? She thinks she can mock me? I walk up to Alex and push her. Alex falls and now she's on the floor.

"Ow!" Alex yelps. "Jordan that was a bitch move. Help me up!"

"Nope." I tell her as I make my way to the stairs. See, she's fallen and now she can't get up. She'll be ok.

Different Day:
You know what I haven't done in awhile? Watch some good old television. I've been so busy with work, promotions, and just life in general that I haven't been able to sit down and watch some good old television. Which is exactly what I'm doing right now. I'm sitting on the couch watching Disney Channel. There is no shame in being 22 and watching Disney!

Paige and Alex are off somewhere, I actually don't know where. Wow, I'm a pretty bad sister and friend. Beth walks into the living room and sits down on the couch beside me. I put my arm around her as usual. Hey!

"Hey!" I shout.

Beth just took the remote from me. She turns to the Fashion World channel.

"I was watching that," I tell her.

"You're 22 and you were watching Hannah Montana," Beth says. "I'm going to need you to grow up, just a little. Besides Paige just called and she told me to turn to Fashion World."

I cross my arms over my chest and pout. "There is nothing wrong with me watching Hannah Montana," I mumble.

"Yeah there is."

"And now it's time for Fashion Talk with your host Susan Chance!" the announcer on the TV show announces.

A white lady wearing some kind of "fashionable" outfit appears on the screen. She's a brunette and looks like she's in her early thirties, MAYBE last twenties. She's smiling at her audience.

"Hello my fellow fashionistas!" Susan greets the audience. "I have a special treat for you today! Today I have a very special guest. This designer is one of the youngest hot designers in the fashion world today. She got her start being an assistant and then stylist for actor Jason Mewes. Then she got her big break when fashion designer icon, Rebecca James, took her under her wing. She was one of the designers at the 10 Designers to Watch show at New York's Fashion Week 2008 and ever since then everything has been going her way. Next month she will be making her costumer designing debut with the highly anticipated movie Henry the Eight, and will be premiering her new summer collection. Ladies, gentlemen, and fellow fashionistas, show some fashion love for PAIGE MICHALCHUK!"

WHOA! I didn't know Paige was going to be on tv today. Why didn't she tell me? Paige appears on the screen looking fabulous, of course. She's wearing one of her designs and her hair is nicely done. I bet Alex is there too, probably.

"Did you know Paige was going to be up here today?" I ask Beth.

Beth nods her head. "Yeah," she answers.

"Does anyone tell me anything in this house?"

"Why should we? You find out aboot everything anyway from sneaking around like a creeper."

I'm pouting again. "That's not nice."

Beth looks at me and smiles. "But you're a cute creeper," she says. "And you're MY creeper." She kisses me on the cheek.

Ok I guess I'll forgive her. I turn my attention back to the screen. Paige is now sitting down in an armchair while Susan is sitting in an armchair right next to her. The audience is still applauding. Wow, people must really like Paige. Paige is grinning from ear to ear.

"Wow," Susan says. "I don't think I've ever had an audience applaud for that long, even for me."

Paige laughs. "Well they must all be in really good moods today," she says.

"Or they just love you," Susan says. "But who can blame them? You're absolutely fabulous."

The audience starts applauding again and another huge grin appears on Paige's face.

"Thank you hon," she says to Susan. "You're quite fabulous yourself."

"Alright, so let's get started. So as I mentioned earlier, next month Henry the Eighth will open in theaters in Canada and the U.S. and already there's a huge buzz around it. Can you tell us a little about the movie and the work you did?"

"Yeah, of course. Well Henry the Eighth is aboot King Henry the Eight of England and his struggles with the Catholic Church and his separation from them. The movie really focuses on Henry's personal life at this time because most people only know that he separated from the church because he wanted to get a divorce from his first wife but there's so much more to it than that. Because this movie takes place in the 1500's I spent aboot three months of research looking at old history books and visiting museums in England to make sure I got the right looks. I spent a lot of nights drawing and erasing. I probably ended up using up twenty huge erasers before the movie even started filming."

"So at the time you were hired you had literally just entered the public eye of the fashion world. How did you get hired to be the costume designer for a motion picture movie?"

"Well I actually had a friend who was a P.A. for the movie and around American Thanksgiving she was telling me aboot how they still hadn't had a costume designer because the director and studio couldn't find anyone who they agreed on. So that weekend just for fun I drew up some mock designs. My friend ended up taking my designs, showed them to the director and the rest is history."

"Wow," Susan says, sound fascinated. "That is incredible."

Paige is nodding her head. "When I first got the call telling me I got the job I couldn't believe it. I literally fell out of my chair."

Susan and the audience start laughing.

"Ok so let's move on to your upcoming new summer collection," Susan says. "What can you tell us about it?

"Well I'm very excited aboot it hon," Paige says. "I actually started working on it at the end of last summer and I remembered how I thought to myself that there aren't really enough summer clothes out there that are actually appropriate for young girls these days. Now don't get me wrong, I was definitely one of those girls in high school that as soon as spring rolled around I was in my tank top and some short shorts. But I will admit that there were days where I wanted to wear shorts but I wanted shorts that actually covered my ass and those were pretty hard to find. So I designed this collection with the mindset of designing clothes that will allow girls to show off their bodies when the weather is warm cover them enough at the same time."

"That sounds really interesting," Susan says. "I for one already got my ticket for your show next week."

Paige smiles. "Thank you," she says excitedly. "I'm very excited for the show. This show will be different from any other show I've ever had."

"Well I can't wait. Now it's time to get to a topic that I know all your fans are dying to hear about."

"Ok…"

"Love."

The whole crowd makes that "oo" sound. I didn't know so many people were interested in Paige's love life. Paige is smiling and blushing.

"I didn't know everyone was interested in my love life," she says.

"Oh but we are," Susan says. "The love life of a fashion designer is one of the most interesting things about them. So Paige, feel free to share whatever you want."

Paige laughs softly. "Well I would like to say something to the audience, my fans, and everyone out there in fashion world and non-fashion world. A couple of weeks ago I came out to my parents. After keeping it a secret for years I finally told my parents that I'm bisexual."

Holy! Did she really just say that? On international television? Wow, Paige sure has been gusty lately. The audience gasps and then starts applauding.

Susan looks surprised. "Really?" she asks in disbelief.

Paige is nodding her head. "Yes, I'm out and I'm proud."

The audience starts applauding again and this time it's louder. Wow, people in the fashion world really do like gay people, and I guess bisexual people as well.

"Paige this is very brave of you to tell us," Susan says.

Paige shrugs her shoulders. "Well I didn't want to keep it a secret because keeping it a secret would have made it seem like I'm ashamed of whom I am and I'm not. I spent many years debating with myself aboot labels and what people would think of me and finally I listened to the words of those closest to me and I stopped worrying aboot people and labels. If someone has a problem aboot who I love then that's their problem, not mine."

Wow, Paige is like on a roll right now. She is hitting this interview out of the park.

"So since you've confessed this to us I have to ask you something now," Susan says.

"Go ahead, ask me anything."

Susan leans over. "Is there a special someone in your life right now?"

Paige is smiling like hardcore right now. Like she's smiling so big I wouldn't be surprised if it's hurting her face. She's nodding her head.

"There is," she says. "I'm currently in a relationship with a woman that I love very much."

"Can you tell us who?" Susan asks.

"Actually she's here right now," Paige says. Paige points to the left, or the right, the way I'm watching it looks like she's pointing to the left.

The camera pans over to where Paige is pointing. There's Alex in all her glory. Wow she looks scared shitless right now.

"Come on over!" Susan calls to her.

Alex's eyes widen.

"Hon, come here," Paige says.

Alex hobbles over to Paige and Susan. The audience is applauding as Alex hobbles over to them. Paige stands up when Alex reaches her and takes Alex's hand into her own. Susan stands up as well.

"And who is this?" Susan asks excitedly.

"This is Alex," Paige introduces her. "My amazing, wonderful girlfriend."

Alex waves but it looks awkward because she waved using her broken arm.

"Well Alex it is very nice to meet you," Susan says. "You look a bit scared."

"Just a little bit," Alex says. "I didn't really expect to be on camera."

Susan chuckles. "Well you look fabulous so don't worry. How long have you two been dating?"

"Aboot two and a half months," Paige answers.

"I have to ask, how serious is it?"

Paige and Alex look at each other and smile. Alex pulls Paige in for a kiss. Wow, I guess they decided that if they're going to do this they might as well make it big. The audience is ooing and awing. Alex and Paige pull away from their kiss. Alex looks at Susan.

"Paige is the love of my life," Alex says. "I'm the luckiest woman in the world."

Different Day:
So Paige and Alex are like the new lesbian poster couple. Move over Ellen and Portia because Paige and Alex have arrived. Although there are a lot of people out there who aren't really into fashion THAT much, like me, everyone soon learned about and saw the kiss between Alex and Paige when it went viral. Paige's coming out on Fashion Talk actually has over 100,000 views and the kiss has over 500,000 views and it's only been two days. E! News even called Paige to get a quote from her. Most people would think coming out like that and then kissing your girlfriend would be a deal breaker but if anything Paige's popularity has sky rocketed. GLADD called the other day and told her that they want her to come to New York and give a speech about her struggles over her sexuality and how she overcame them. No offense, not to seem jealous or anything but Paige didn't really have any struggles. I mean yeah she had somewhat of an internal struggle with herself but that wasn't even that bad. I'm just saying.

Numerous fashion magazines have been calling her, wanting to set up an interview with her. Apparently some people might think that the Palex kiss was just a publicity stunt since Paige's new collection is about to come out. But a lot of people want to talk to her because apparently this is really big news in the fashion world. Apparently there aren't a lot of lesbian or bisexual fashion designers in the industry. Paige is becoming a role model and icon to many people. I'll admit that it's pretty cool.

I just got home from working on some promotional stuff for work. Can I just say that they do not pay me enough for all the work I do? Yeah… I go to the front door to find a box outside. It's addressed to Alex. Weird, after only two days and Alex is already getting presents from fans. She kisses Paige on television one time and all of the sudden she gets tons of email and presents yet I'm on the radio everyday and I get nothing, NOTHING.

I unlock the front door and walk into the condo. Beth's not here. She's at the animal shelter volunteering. I might as well take this present to Alex's room. I go upstairs and walk down the hallway to her room.

"Alex, you got a package," I say as I'm opening the door.

"AHHH!"

"AAHHHH!" I scream. OH MY GOD!

"AHHH!"

"AHHH!"

"CLOSE THE DOOR!"

I slam the door shut. Oh my God! I just say a naked Paige laid out on Alex's bed in some type of Playboy model pose. I have been scarred for life. Alex is quickly hobbling toward me.

"What's with all the screaming?" she asks.

I can't speak. I don't even know what to say. I just want someone to open my head and take away that memory from my brain. Alex's bedroom door slowly opens. Paige walks out in a robe. Alex looks at me and then at Paige and then back at me. Alex has a questioning look on her face.

"What just happened?" she asks.

I take a deep breath and breathe it out. "You," I say while pointing at Alex. "And you," I point at Paige. "Have twenty four hours to grab all your stuff and move it to your place."

"What happened?" Alex asks.

"I'm kicking you out!" I yell. "I was just scarred for life! It is time for YOU to move in with Paige! Just grab your things and go."

"Jor-"

"No, nu-uh," I interrupt Alex. "No more loud ass moaning at night. No more hearing the soundtrack of your sexy time." I shiver as my memory goes back to that night and many others like it. "And no more naked girlfriend just sitting on your bed in a Playboy model pose!"

Alex looks at Paige with her eyebrow raised. Paige is looking down at the floor."

"It… is time… for you… to move out," I tell Alex.

I'm walking away from them now.

"Jordan!" Alex calls out my name.

"Time for you to move out! That's the end of it!"

I need to take a shower, I feel dirty.

A/N: Do you feel dirty? Jordan sure does feel dirty.