"GET IT IN HIS MOUTH!" Sirius said as Peter aimed for James open mouth. They were all huddled in one of James spare rooms, wrapped up in sleeping blankets and with a large selection of chocolate and sweets and hot foaming butterbeer and hot chocolate. Outside the orange sun was setting beyond the valley and the dark blue sky had taken lead over the majestic dance of night and day.

"I'm trying!" Peter wailed.

"It's not like its not big enough!" Remus said picking up a drooball and throwing it towards James who knocked it away with his hand.

"Are you saying I'm loud mouthed?" James asked.

"Yes," Remus replied, helping himself to some chocolate.

James gave a pout. Sirius kicked him. "Grow up, Potter." He said, throwing a bertie bott to Peter's open mouth. "It's not like we're saying you have a big head – " He stopped and frowned. "Wait a second..."

James laughed before smacking Sirius with a pillow. Sirius barely reacted then said stiffly. "Ow-you-hurt-me-with-a-soft-goose-feathered-pillow-it-was-almost-like-being-stabbed-with-a-knife!" He said sarcastically in mock pain.

"It should," James grunted. "Moony?" Remus looked up just in time for James to throw a blue bertie bott at him. He caught it in his mouth and celebrated, raising his hands above his head.

"I think I win!" He said.

"Shut up." James said, picking up his pillow menacingly.

"Boys?" Mrs Potter opened the bedroom door, her arms laden with hot blankets that she had prepared. "Having fun?"

James leapt up to take the blankets from his mother. "Thanks mum," He said. "Yeah, you know..."

Mrs Potter smiled. "Just don't leave too much of a mess, dear. Uri won't appreciate it."

"Okay mum."

"And don't stay up too late."

"I know mum." James said.

"Don't get high," Mrs Potter said.

"On what?" James asked. "Butterbeer and chocolate?"

"You know about those muggles." Mrs Potter said. "From down the road. They're always trying to get you to –"

"Mum, trust me, we're not going to get high!" James said.

"You want me to leave?" Mrs Potter asked.

"I never said that," James said blushing.

"Aw, bless, he's all embarrassed by his mum," Mrs Potter said hugging him and giving him a peck on the cheek. "It's okay, I'm gone. Try not to be too loud. Night boys."

"Goodnight Mrs Potter," Remus and Peter chorused.

"Goodnight Dorea," Sirius said, not looking up from his platter of food.

Mrs Potter gave the boys a quick smile then left. James closed the door behind her. He looked back at his friends and gave a big smile.

"Where's your dad?" Sirius asked.

"Out,"

"Out?" Remus asked.

"One of the raids," James said. "I'm sure he's told me, but I zone out when he talks about work. All work and no play makes James crazy."

"James is already crazy," Remus said. Sirius high-fived him.

"Don't applaud such a low stoop as that," James said.

"It wasn't low," Remus defended. "I thought it was bloody marvellous."

James flopped back down onto the rug and picked the strands of his sleeping bag. All four had grown up a little more over the four weeks that they had not seen each other. Sirius, if possible was more handsome, his cheeks clearly defined and his black hair, though not as long as it was when they first met, was still flowing and full. His voice had changed too, becoming thicker and stronger. Remus had changed too, he looked thinner than usual but he had definitely grown a couple of inches making him by far the tallest amongst the four friends and his voice was hoarser than James had remembered it. Peter too appeared to be different. Though still quite a fat boy, he had grown a little, losing some of the puppy dog weight. James, though not as handsome as Sirius, couldn't be really described as bad-looking. His black hair thicker and fuller and his cheekbones had become more defined, showing off his soft hazel eyes and straight nose. There was a clear defined change in the way all four boys held themselves, amongst themselves they acted like the big kids that they were, around others they seemed to keep themselves restrained and not do as much nonsense as possible. They all knew however that it wouldn't stay when they got back to Hogwarts.

James rolled over and stared at the ceiling, when he was younger his parents had bewitched it, much like at Hogwarts, to look like the midnight sky. Spirals of stars and midnight mist flew around, comets darting across the imperial blue.

"I want to go out," James said.

"Well," Sirius said as his friend looked around. "I am willing, but I think it will be difficult. I mean, you're family are more... Accepting than mine and I doubt they would appreciate a gay marriage-"

"What on earth are you talking about?" James asked.

Sirius grinned. "Oh, that's not what you were talking about. Silly me."

"You worry me sometimes, Black." James said.

"Likewise, Potter."

"As I was saying," James said. "I want to go out."

"Where?" Remus asked. "It depends how costly it is."

"No!" James said. "I mean out! As in out of the house!"

"We know," Peter said. "We're just yanking your leg."

"Lovely." James said. "Well, who's up for it?"

Remus looked outside, a faint crease appearing across his face. "Would we be safe?" He asked.

"Moony," Sirius said, getting up and pulling on a pair of jeans. "You are probably the most dangerous creature here, I'm sure we'll survive if we come across Death Eaters."

"Is it likely that we'll come across Death Eaters?" Peter asked.

"Nah," James said. "Dad has put up the best defence spells across the entire Potter manor and the forest and grounds. Sometimes I think this place is safer than Hogwarts."

"Your mum won't mind will she?" Remus asked, pulling on his jumper and cloak. He fastened it then reached for his trainers.

"Who says she needs to know?" James grinned mischievously. He reached into Sirius' bag and pulled out the knife that he had given him during their first year.

"How the bloody hell did you know I had that with me?" Sirius asked.

"Because you sad lonely pathetic weirdo," James said. "You never go anywhere without it."

Sirius made a face. Remus was still frowning. "What is that?" He asked.

"It opens any lock," James said. "I was thinking, wouldn't it be cool if we got the brooms from the shed and flew around for a bit."

"Sounds awesome," Sirius cried, leaping to his feet.

"As long as we don't make it competitive," Remus said mildly.

"I honestly don't see your problem with flying," Sirius said, tying his hair back in a gold ribbon and picking up his woollen cloak. "Come on,"

They crept out of the room silently, tip-toeing down the stairs. James paused outside his parent's room. They listened for a few minutes, checking if Mrs Potter was asleep, once certain, they moved down the many flights of stairs. Jams grabbed his invisibility cloak from the porch and stuffed it into his bag before swinging it over his shoulders. He clicked open the door.

"Got your wands boys?" He asked. The rest raised their hands, smiling slightly. James shook his head sadly. "That's not what I meant but I'll let it slide."

Sirius kicked him. James opened the door and they all sneaked out. Once he had made sure that the door was locked again, they all stumbled towards the large shed at the edge of lawn. The Potter home was a large and impressive, with several storeys and a lot of land that stretched on for many miles. Behind the house there was a mock Quidditch pitch complete with hoops. On the outskirts the forest sat with trees that were hundreds of years old stretching up far into the sky. James wasn't entirely sure if there were any creatures that existed in the forest, but he was not worried; anything dark would have been chased away by his father.

He handed them out a broom each, then, once ready the mounted carefully and kicked off. Immediately they were pleased that they had put on their thick cloaks. Though it was summer, the night air had taken a turn and was bitterly cold as they flew through the lands. James was laughing hysterically at Peter who was unable to control his broom. He and Sirius decided to race. Remus rolled his eyes.

"I thought this wasn't going to turn into a competition!" He cried, lazily speeding up towards them, his cloak flapping wildly as he flew. Sirius winked and zoomed up, narrowly missing a tree. Remus swerved at the last minute narrowly avoiding being split in half. James soared through the trees missing the branches and twigs, he was clearly expert in where he was going, Sirius, Peter and Remus following.

"COME ON!" James shouted. "I KNOW YOU'RE SLOW BUT GOD ALMIGHTY!"

"WATCH OUT!" Sirius bellowed. James looked around just in time. He managed to dodge a branch but it hit him on the arm, sending him spinning through the air on his broom. He regained his balance before grinning stupidly at his friends. Sirius was tempted to hex him before realising that he couldn't do magic out of Hogwarts. James flew up, past the tree tops and hovering over them. Remus, Sirius and Peter followed, flying over the trees. The wind picked up, hitting their cloaks and making them flutter majestically. They all grinned at each other before speeding off further and farther from the house.

...

"Thank you for coming," Remus said.

Sirius nodded. "Sure,"

"It's not like..." Remus sighed and kicked his feet. He shook his head. "It's not like I haven't seen her before now. It's just..."

"I know," Sirius replied simply.

"Thank you for not telling James and Peter."

"It's okay,"

"I just... it's just hard."

"You know you can always talk to me." Sirius said.

Remus shook his head. "You're too good to me."

Sirius licked his lips. "I'm not. You're too harsh on yourself."

"That's the way the world sees creatures like me," Remus said simply. "Who am I to judge on what they believe?"

"Because it bullshit!" Sirius said. "I mean... Bullcrap... I mean... Oh shits sake." Remus smiled and Sirius frowned. "Your parents?"

"Don't know I'm here," He replied, bitterly. "Let's just leave it at that."

Sirius nodded. "Moony, are you sure you want to..."

"Sirius," Remus said, quietly, pushing his mousey brown hair from his eyes. "I need you to understand. I can't..."

"Alright," Sirius said.

"Besides," Remus said tiredly. "I thought you wanted to know."

"Only if you want me to," Sirius replied. "Trust me, I don't want to make you do anything you're not comfortable with."

Remus opened his mouth to reply, but a healer swept past them tending to a patient who was obviously interested in everything around him, often stopping and staring at portraits of other healers.

"Come along Mr. Paterson," The Healer said kindly.

Remus bit his lips. "You becoming animagi makes me uncomfortable." He said.

Sirius let out a bark like laugh. "Well, you don't have a say in that," He said.

"Lovely," Remus said.

"Mr Lupin?" A healer popped her head around the door. "She's ready to see you know." Remus nodded and stood up, Sirius followed suit. They both entered the ward and went to the bed at the far end. The only other occupant was a tired looking Wizard lying on the bed, fully clothed and staring absentmindedly at the ceiling. There on the bed at the end was a tiny figure. Leather straps bound to her arms and legs keeping her railed to the bed. There were scars across her face from where she had bitten and scratched herself. She was sleeping silently. Sirius observed that she looked not unlike his friend. She too had mousey brown hair – a little darker than Remus' but none the less, the same texture.

Remus sat down by the bed and took her hand. "Emily?" He asked. "It's me," Emily remained still. He bit his lips. "This is Sirius," He said. "Emily? Can you hear me? I brought you flowers. You remember how much you love forget-me-nots." Silence. Remus let out a sigh and took the dead flowers from the vase on her bedside table and threw them in the bin. He placed the fresh flowers in the vase. "Doesn't that look nice? The healers have been told to change the flowers regularly. They never listen do they though?"

Sirius watched as Remus tried to get his sister to show some response. Sirius knew that it would not work. From what he had been told, Emily could not even stand the sight of her brother so watching Remus try reminded him of bear baiting. Did Remus know how she would react? Was he wanting that kind of response. Lost in his thoughts, he hadn't realised that Remus had fallen silent. Sirius kindly placed his hand on his friend's shoulder. Remus looked up briefly and then sighed, looking back at his sister.

"You don't need to be here." He said.

"Rubbish," Sirius said. "I want to be here."

"Won't get much from her," Remus said sadly. "She doesn't speak much. Just murmurs... I don't come here a lot. I'm just scared how she'd react when she saw me."

"Is that why you want to wake her up?" Sirius asked, dragging a seat beside him.

"Partly," Remus admitted. "I just want to know if she will recognise me. I need her... I need her back."

Sirius nodded. Remus shook his head sadly and leaned back, balancing his head on his arm, hiding his eyes. Sirius watched for a moment. He stood up.

"I'll get you some tea," He said. Remus said nothing but nodded. Sirius sighed. "Remus, Remus look at me." He did so as Sirius stooped low to look face to face with his friend. "This was never your fault. Stop blaming yourself, if you continue to blame yourself, what kind of life can you have?"

Remus was shaking his head. "I'm not sure I want a life when I know she can never have one."

"That's incredibly selfish of you," Sirius said. "You want to waste life just because another can't have it? Have you not considered that she would want you to be happy if she wasn't like this?"

"No," Remus said. "I know that she wants me to suffer for what I have done to her."

"Remus, please," Sirius said almost pleadingly. "Stop it. You have so much to offer people. You don't need to be this way."

Remus was about to speak when a piercing cry came from between them. Remus looked down. Emily had woken up and was trying desperately to get away from him. She was screaming at the top of her lungs and scratching at her face. Remus' face drained of all colour. He stood up.

"Emily," He cried. "Emily please!"

Emily was trying to wretch herself away from him still screaming with tears pouring down her face. Healers surrounded her in an instant pushing Remus away. He looked distraught and he grabbed fistfuls of his hair, backing away from his screaming sister.

"I didn't mean..." He said. "I didn't..." He backed against the wall falling to the floor. Sirius went to his side and pulled him up.

"Come on," He said. "Come on," He persisted. "Up you get."

"I didn't..." Remus started.

"I know." Sirius said. "Come on."

Emily was still screaming.

Sirius took Remus from St. Mungos out to the streets of London. He had remained remarkably quiet as Remus had lost himself in his own thoughts. He felt unparalleled sympathy for his friend and allowed him to wallow in shame for he knew that no matter how he tried to pick his friend up it wouldn't work. They passed through the Leaky Cauldron, Tom offering them a drink of Firewhiskey. Sirius was tempted to try it, but he knew Remus would disapprove even in his sullen state. They kindly declined and tapped the third brick from the left above the dustbin.

Remus finally spoke up. "I want ice cream." He said finally.

Sirius' face broke into a smile. "Ice cream it is then."

"Sirius... Thanks for..."

"Don't." Sirius said flatly.

Remus frowned. "I'm sorry?"

"If you start with the crying and the thank you's, then my acceptance speech won't be nearly as impressive," Sirius said plainly. "I did what any friend would do."

"I can't thank you enough though-"

"Bullshit – I mean... Poopy," Sirius said. "Stop being such a sap."

A/N Sorry about the shortness of chapters that have influxed you recently. I will pick it up, but right now it's 3am in the morning in Scotland and I have to get up at 6 for work... Urgh. Night night.