- CHAPTER TEN -

Sick to My Stomach

Christmas Eve greeted me the next day with a strange, sinking feeling in my stomach. It took me a few minutes to place it before I remembered what I had seen the night before. I was in no position to enjoy the excitement of the pre-Christmas jitters. Instead I was fixated on Fred.

I made a point of avoiding the twins for the entire morning. I skipped out on breakfast, making me irritable, and stuck to Ginny's room wrapping presents. I didn't want to go downstairs and have to look Fred in the eye. I would feel nauseated and guilty. I wasn't supposed to see what I saw the night before. Fred was obviously keeping something from me, and I was entirely unwilling to explore what exactly was going on there. The thought terrified me.

I busied myself, pretending not to hear the happy chatter of a well-fed family downstairs. I needed to get my head cleared before I faced anyone. I wasn't sure what to do. Should I act like nothing happened, or should I confront Fred? The twins and I tended to have an open-door policy when it came to anything that was on our minds, but the one outstanding exception to that rule was romance. It was an unspoken agreement that I wouldn't talk to the blokes about anything boy-related, and the same was true for them. They never approached me with anything to do with relationships, and that was just how I liked it. If Fred actually was harbouring secret feelings for me, that crossed a serious line.

I was deep in thought, lost in my own worries, when the twins walked in. I looked up, startled, and blanched immediately at the sight of Fred. I averted my eyes as quickly as I could, and tried to sound normal as I greeted them.

"Good morning," I said, looking down at my hands as I fumbled with the wrapping of Ginny's gift. My voice sounded a tad too high, but I hoped neither Fred nor George would notice.

"Good morning," George said, and I could feel both his and Fred's eyes scrutinizing me from above where I sat on the floor.

"You didn't come down for breakfast," Fred said. It sounded like a question.

"Wasn't hungry," I replied, trying hard to sound casual.

Neither of them replied to that, but I felt certain their silence was filled with unexpressed doubt.

"Mum left you a plate," George said. "She thought maybe you were still asleep."

"I'm just doing some last-minute wrapping," I told them, although that much was fairly obvious.

"Right," Fred said. "Well are you busy now? We kind of wanted to show you something."

"Well, technically I am busy," I replied, still not looking up at either of them.

"You can finish that later," George told me impatiently. "This will only take a minute."

"We want to show you the new Perception Putty," Fred said enthusiastically.

"Perception Putty?" I asked, looking up at him against my better judgement. It was hard to make eye-contact after last night. Even though nothing had actually happened between us, it certainly felt like things had changed—at least for me.

"Do you like it?" he asked.

"It's the name we came up with for that clay," George explained. "It takes the shape of whatever you're thinking of, and uses your memory to make a replica."

"So it all changes based on your perception," Fred said with a grin. "We thought it was clever."

I nodded in agreement, trying to look impressed. "So it worked then? You've finished it?"

"Come look," George encouraged.

I was reluctant, but thought it might be best to just act as though nothing had happened the night before. After all, neither of the twins knew I had seen anything out of the ordinary. Until I made up my mind about whether or not to confront Fred, the best thing for me to do was act normal. Otherwise he would catch on that something was bothering me and I'd have to tell him anyway.

"Sure," I said, pushing the mess I had made of Ginny's floor off to the side.

Fred grinned happily at me and made to take my hand in his. I flinched and pulled away just as his fingers grazed mine. He shot a look at me, and I tried to play it off like I had to scratch my nose. I tucked my hand into the pocket of my jeans afterwards to avoid another encounter like that.

George pulled me quickly into his room and shut the door behind us. I took a seat down on his bed and waited for the grand reveal. Of course, neither of them knew I had already snuck a look at the finished product before I had gone to bed. I would just have to act astonished.

"We haven't figured out how we're going to package it yet," Fred told me, gesturing over to lumps of the grey-white putty sitting on the dresser in the corner of the room.

"We figure a Snitch-sized ball is sufficient enough for each package," George said, picking up a ball and handing it over to me.

"We finally got the colours right," Fred said, staring at me with expectancy.

I took the ball from George and rolled it around in my palm. My head was so full of Fred that I needed to think of something less-conspicuous. I pictured a Hippogriff, thinking quickly of Hagrid's Hippogriff Buckbeak who was causing so much controversy at Hogwarts this year. The putty reformed instantly into the shape of a small Hippogriff with shiny grey feathers and great wings, fading into silky horse-hair at the back.

"Do something more colourful," George encouraged.

I picked Bill Weasley, wishing to test the accuracy of the firey Weasley hair, but not wanting to give Fred the wrong idea by letting the putty take his shape like it had weeks ago during the first Hogsmeade trip of the year. A miniature, moving Bill stared up at us from my hand, smiling amiably.

"See," George said excitedly. "We've finally got it!"

"Yeah, you have," I said happily, allowing myself to grin fully at them both. They were beaming.

"Why'd you think of Bill?" Fred asked. There was a slightly teasing look in his eyes.

"Oh, Juliet has had a crush on Bill for ages," George said, brushing it off.

"That's not why!" I objected, although I couldn't deny the claim. When I was in first and second year and had had my first encounters with Bill Weasley, I had a tough time being around him without getting extremely clumsy and embarrassed. I had harboured a silly childhood crush on him until I was thirteen, and was teased relentlessly by Charlie, George and Fred. It had been quite an ordeal.

"I was under the impression you were over that," George said with an evil grin on his face.

"I am," I said irritably, and watched as the Perception Putty changed into a miniscule Fred and George, who were both pointing and laughing hysterically in my hand.

"I guess we don't have to tease you for this," George said, staring down at the models. "You clearly remember the ridicule from before."

"Of course I do," I said. "It was the first and only time I'll ever let you two catch wind of any romantic thoughts going on in my head."

I chanced a look at Fred to see if he would have a visible reaction and was surprised to see he looked thoughtful. Before my mind could betray me I curled my fingers around the laughing figures of the twins and stuck the putty in my pocket.

"I can keep this one, right?" I asked.

"It's yours," George said. "You're the first customer, so I guess this one can be on the house."

"After all you put me through, I should be getting a hundred of these for free," I said with a half-grin.

Christmas Eve day passed by quickly, but awkwardly as everyone at the Burrow anxiously awaited Christmas. Fred seemed to be trying awfully hard to get close to me, and I was trying equally hard to prevent him doing so. I wasn't sure if I was just noticing these things after what I had seen the night before. Perhaps he had always been that way with me and I had just never paid attention. But now that I was, I was a little worried.

At dinner that night I continued to notice Fred's eyes on me. Every time I'd turn to look at him he'd grin sheepishly and look back down at his food. I wanted to talk to George about it, but I wasn't sure I'd be able to get him alone. George had hinted to me that he believed Fred had started to take a fancy to me, but I hadn't truly believed it. My mind had changed since our previous conversation. It seemed much more likely that George had been right.

When dinner had ended I went back up to Ginny's room to finish my wrapping and to clean up the mess I'd left behind. It didn't seem like I was going to get a moment alone with George to voice my concerns, so I would just have to try and deal with it on my own.

Ginny came in just as I was finishing up.

"Do you need some help?" she asked.

"I've just finished," I said, "but thanks."

"Okay," she said, taking a seat down on her bed. I could feel her staring at me. I turned and quirked an eyebrow at her.

"What's up?" I asked.

She gave me a shy smirk and looked thoughtful for a minute before speaking.

"I've been meaning to ask you something," she said.

"Okay?" I prompted, taking a seat on my cot across from her.

"Is something going on with you and Fred?" she questioned. I was surprised with the boldness of her question. Ginny was only twelve years old, and she had always been a tad shy with me. The fact that a twelve-year-old girl was perceptive enough to realize something may be going on was a little disheartening. The evidence that Fred may fancy me was starting to pile up.

"Going on?" I asked, attempting to look puzzled. "What do you mean?"

"Well I don't know if you've noticed," she said carefully, "but I think he likes you."

I bit my lip. "Why's that?"

"Well it's just some things I've been noticing," she said. Ginny was starting to sound like George, and I could feel the sinking feeling in my stomach start to return.

"Right, well I doubt he does, he's my best mate," I said calmly.

"Well maybe…" Ginny let her voice trail off.

"Just out of curiosity," I said, "What kind of things have you been noticing?"

Ginny shrugged.

"Mostly the way he looks at you during dinner," she said, "And the way he's constantly trying to get your attention…holding your hand, playing with your hair…little stuff like that."

I started to feel sick. She was making it very hard to deny, and I wanted badly to do just that.

I brushed it off, trying to sound casual and unfazed. "He's been doing all that? How come I haven't noticed?"

"I don't know, maybe because you're his best friend, and you never thought it was possible or something," she answered.

I forced a laugh.

"No, there's got to be some other explanation for it," I said simply. "There's just no way."

"I don't know," she said again, more slowly this time. "I noticed because it's the same… the same way I am around…" she blushed profusely and stared down at her hands. I was confused for a moment before I caught on.

"Oh!" I said. "Harry Potter."

If possible, Ginny blushed even more furiously.

"I know I'm being stupid when it happens," she said quietly, "but the way Fred looks at you… it's almost how I imagine I look when I see Harry."

I felt suddenly very strange. Not only was I having a conversation with Fred and George's twelve-year-old sister about Fred's potential feelings for me, but we had somehow got onto the topic of her and Harry too. I wasn't sure if I should feel flattered or frightened that my relationships with the Weasleys had suddenly become much more intimate than I had intended.

"Well…maybe I'll talk to George about it, see what he says," I told her. I made a move to get up and leave the room. Ginny was still looking embarrassed and I wasn't sure I was the right person to give her advice about Harry. I was still dumbstruck about my situation. I was the last person who should be giving romantic advice to another girl.

"Er… thanks for the insight," I told her as I hurried away.

George was heading up the stairs just as I was about to climb to the next level towards his room.

"George!" I hissed, trying to keep my voice down so as not to be overheard by anyone else in the house. The situation was already mortifying enough.

"What do you want?" he asked me suspiciously, stopping a few steps below me on the staircase.

"Where's Fred?" I asked, not wanting him to overhear our conversation.

George nodded towards the next landing where their bedroom door stood ajar.

"What is it?" he asked.

I made an uncomfortable face and tried to choose my words carefully.

"Has um…has Fred…told you that he fancies me?"

A grin formed on George's lips.

"What's this?" he asked, "Has Jules just realized she's in love with Frederick too?"

"George-"

"Do you need help picking out children's names? Because I've had a few ideas…I've always thought George Weasley the Second had a nice ring to it. I mean I may never have children, so someone needs to carry on my title-"

"George!" I interrupted him.

"What are you two talking about?"

I whipped around to see Fred leaning over the railing, looking down at both of us. He had a curious expression on his face. It didn't look as though he had overheard anything.

"Nothing," I said calmly.

Fred gave us both a suspicious look before returning to his room and closing the door.

George turned back to me and gave me a supremely arrogant look. "I came to you ages ago about Fred and you waited until now to bring this up," he rolled his eyes. "It's very cliché of you to start up a relationship on Christmas Eve. I really would have thought you were better than that, Juliet."

"George come on, can we be serious?" I said. "I'm not trying to start anything up."

"What do you mean?" he asked, sounding confused.

"I'm not saying I fancy him," I said in a hushed voice. "I just…wanted to know if you're sure he fancies me."

"You mean…has he told me he likes you?" George asked.

"Yes," I answered.

"Why are you so curious all of a sudden?" he asked, a knowing smirk playing on his lips.

"I'm not," I said.

George gave me a disbelieving look.

"I was talking to Ginny, and she said she thinks he has feelings for me," I wasn't about to tell him that I had walked in on Fred fantasizing about snogging me senseless. That was too much for me to handle. "I just wanted to know the truth."

"Oh, so when I say he likes you I'm lying, but when Ginny says it-"

"George would you just answer the question?"

"Well, I don't know for sure," he admitted.

I felt a small amount of relief flood me. If Fred hadn't said anything to George about this, then it was likely he wasn't planning on acting on his feelings. Even though the twins weren't much for talking about emotions, I knew that this wasn't something they would keep from each other. The fact that Fred hadn't told George meant that he probably wasn't serious about the silly fantasies he might be having.

"Juliet, Fred may not have told me how he feels about you, but I'm his twin. I know him better than anybody."

I frowned. It was like he could read my mind.

"Trust me on this," he said.

I let out an exasperated sigh. "Ok…well then what am I supposed to do?"

He smiled and shrugged.

"Now if I went around telling everyone what to do the world would be a much different place," he said. "You'll have to figure that one out on your own."

He pinched my cheek affectionately and passed me on the stairs, heading up to his room.

"Fine, thanks, you've been a load of help," I said sarcastically as he made his way to his bedroom.

He turned and winked at me just before disappearing into the room, where I feared he may tell Fred everything we had just talked about.

Feeling a little sick to my stomach I made my way back to Ginny's bedroom, hoping to God that George was wrong about Fred this time.