- CHAPTER EIGHTEEN-

The Aftermath

As June approached, even the weather seemed to be celebrating the Gryffindor win of the Quidditch Cup. All anyone wanted to do was walk around on the grounds, but of course, with exams approaching, no one could. The twins and I stayed inside and tried to learn everything we should've learned over the year. The homework had piled up even more due to the fact that the O.W.L.s were so close.

The teachers had been badgering us since the start of term to make sure we were continuously revising for our final examinations. Things were only getting worse as the end of the year swiftly approached. Professor McGonagall was probably the only teacher who was feeling good-natured enough to give us a bit of a break. Because so many of her fifth year Gryffindor students had just won her the Quidditch Cup, she did seem to be going a bit easier on us. That wasn't to say we weren't still studying vigorously for Transfiguration, it's just that we had a slight bit less on our plate than we might have if we had lost the match to Slytherin.

On the week of exams, the castle seemed a lot quieter than usual. The students were desperately trying to get in any last-minute studying. It was strange to see so few students socializing in between classes. Of course, with the Dementors still standing guard outside of the castle and the ever-looming threat of Sirius Black, we were still forbidden to be without supervision while we roamed the corridors.

I received my O.W.L. timetable during one of our last Transfiguration lessons of the year. Professor McGonagall put the times on the blackboard and all of us copied them down obediently. The tests were spread over two consecutive weeks. I could hear Fred and George groaning from either side of me as they read over the schedule.

"You will sit the theory papers in the mornings and practice in the afternoons. Your Astronomy examination, will of course, be taken during the night," Professor McGonagall was explaining.

Unfortunately, if Professor McGonagall were to say something of dire importance during her speech, I would not have heard it. She continued on about anti-cheating devices to ensure legitimacy while my mind wandered. I probably should have been trying to pay closer attention. Not only were my grades at stake, but I held a certain responsibility to Professor McGonagall. After the lengths she was going to help me become an Animagus, I felt I owed her to act as a decent student… at the very least in her class, anyway. However, my mind was on other things. Or rather, my mind was on one other thing.

Fred Weasley.

And more specifically, the kiss we had shared after the Quidditch match.

Almost as soon as we had made it up to our dormitory that night, Katie and Alicia had sprung on me. They had both seen the blatant display and were eager to pester me until I told them what was going on. Oddly enough, though, I had nothing to tell them. I wasn't sure what the kiss had meant, if I was being honest. Fred had acted as though it was just a joke… something he did on a whim without thinking. I was sure that Fred had developed feelings for me over the course of the school year, but the fact that he had walked away like it was nothing had me baffled. I had no idea if it had actually meant anything to him, although I couldn't deny that it had certainly meant something to me.

The girls were put out by my lack of information, but were quick to speculate with me about the meaning of said kiss. It was the first time I had actually spoken openly with someone about the prospect of having a relationship with Fred. Even on the rare occasions that I had spoken to George about it I had never truly admitted that I had developed feelings for my best mate. With the girls it seemed natural. I was thankful to have them around to talk it out with. I was perplexed and didn't know where else to turn for advice.

When the bell rang to dismiss the class I was brought back into the real world. I quickly collected all of my things and shoved them into my rucksack. Fred and I headed out of the classroom with Lee and George following close behind.

"You okay, Jules?" Fred asked. He seemed to have noticed I hadn't been my usual self. What he didn't seem to have figured out was why I was behaving the way I was.

"Yeah," I lied. "Why?"

"You look off," he answered, surveying me with a frown on his face.

Brilliant observation.

I forced a breathy laugh and shook my head, staring down at my shoes.

"I'm fine," I said, trying to sound as earnest as possible.

Fred nodded. I couldn't tell if he believed me, but he didn't say anything further. Instead he fell back with George and Lee, leaving me to my thoughts as we wormed our way through the corridors.

I had noticed that Fred had grown more distant since he had kissed me at the match. There was no hand-holding or innocent flirting like there used to be between us. If I had thought about it weeks ago, I wouldn't have thought I'd miss any of the playful signs of affection he bestowed on me. Now that they had ceased, however, I found myself oddly saddened. I didn't want things to go back to the way they were. I hated to admit that I was hung up on Fred, but it irritated me that he didn't seem at all fussed about me after what had happened between us.

I tried to shake off the feeling, thinking I was reading too far into it. Fred and I were just friends. The kiss was based merely on our excitement at the time. It didn't mean anything.

I felt my heart sink. That couldn't possibly be true. I had seen the Perception Putty in Fred's hand that night… and the walk we had taken together after I told him I was going to become an Animagus… I was positive he was trying to tell me something that night. The way he was looking at me was unmistakable.

But why, then, was he acting as though nothing had happened?

I made it through the entire day feeling utterly miffed. Katie and Alicia had wanted to go to George about the matter, but I made them promise they wouldn't. The last thing I wanted was George taking the piss out of me about Fred again.

I was actually surprised that George hadn't approached me about it. I was sure he knew what happened. Even in the unlikely event that he hadn't seen us snogging in the middle of the field, Fred would surely have told him about it.

"Kitchens?"

I looked up from my Potions book to see Fred staring expectantly at me from across the table in the common room. I frowned at him. How could he be so casual after what happened?

"What's wrong?" he asked, catching the unease in my expression.

"Nothing," I said quickly, shutting my book and placing it back in my book bag. "Sure, kitchens. I'll come."

Fred smiled easily at me and led me back out of the common room. I wasn't sure why I was even bothering to follow him. Truth be told, I think some part of me was hoping if we were alone he would want to talk about the two of us. It seemed more likely that he'd want to discuss the matter in private rather than in front of an audience of our friends. Although, the kiss itself had been very public, so embarrassment didn't really seem to affect Fred in the slightest.

I walked next to Fred in silence for a few moments. I had no idea what I should say, and he didn't seem to be making any effort to relieve the tension between us, either. I knew he could sense my discomfort, and I wanted to confide in him, but I wasn't sure how to approach the topic. How do you bring something like that up?

"Fred?" I said, looking sideways at him.

"Yeah?" he answered.

I paused for a minute, trying to think of some way to word what I was thinking, but nothing came to mind. With no intelligent response I left his name hanging there, unable to say any more.

"Is something wrong?" he asked me carefully.

My eyes snapped to his blue ones and I pursed my lips in a firm line. I suddenly felt angry. How could he even ask that? After all of the mixed signals he had been sending me, how could he not expect something to be wrong?

"I don't know," I answered. "Is there?"

I stopped in the corridor and turned towards him, eyeing him pointedly. He looked mystified, which angered me even further.

"Er… sorry, what?" he asked, staring at me with confusion etched on his features.

"Is there something wrong?" I repeated, staring at him directly in the eye.

"Juliet, I have no idea what you're talking about," he said, letting out a nervous laugh that gave him away. I knew immediately he was lying to me. "Can we go eat?"

He reached out to take my arm and I moved backwards to avoid his touch.

"No, we can't," I said.

"Juliet, what's going on?" he said. He ran a hand through his messy red hair anxiously. I was sure the nervous look in his eyes was born from guilt, and it fired me up even more.

"Why don't you tell me what's going on, Fred?" I demanded. I could feel my face heat up in anger. He was playing stupid, I knew he was. Whatever reason Fred had for pretending nothing had happened between us was not good enough. He was my best mate. Regardless of the awkwardness—regardless of the tension—he had no right to snog me and then act as though nothing had happened.

"Jules, calm down," he said, reaching out towards me and taking a firm hold of my arm. "Tell me what's wrong."

I paused and stared at him. He looked worried. He must have known what the problem was, but I could see in his eyes that he didn't want me to bring it up.

Tough. I thought angrily. He was going to have to own up to what he did. I deserved an explanation for the way he was acting.

"We kissed Fred," I said quietly.

Fred was quiet for what felt like a long time, but what I'm sure was only moments. He shook his head and pursed his lips. He almost looked… amused. Confusion bubbled inside of me once more.

"Is that what this is about?" he asked, a relieved smile forming on his face. His grip on my arm lessened, but he did not let go.

I stared at him, wide-eyed in expectation. He didn't say anything else, though, so I answered him.

"Of course that's what this is about," I said, letting the anger colour my tone. "We snogged, Fred."

"You're right," he said casually. "We did."

"And that's it?" I asked, feeling outraged. "That's not the kind of activity friends normally engage in!"

Fred studied me for a long while. I was so angry I hardly managed to take in the expression on his face. He almost looked like he was contemplating. It was as though he had just been presented with a question that he wasn't sure how to answer.

"Wow-um…I'm sorry I did that, I didn't realize it would get you so worked up," he said, and he grinned stupidly at me.

I yanked my arm out of my grasp, feeling it pop a little from the force.

"What is wrong with you?" I yelled suddenly, taking Fred by surprise. He looked panicked now, almost like he had expected this conversation to arise but had hoped he could make it go away. It made me furious.

"Nothing's wrong with me," he answered loudly. "What's wrong with you?"

"You kissed me!" I bellowed. I could hear my voice echo off of the corridor walls.

"Would you keep your voice down?" he said, looking behind his back to ensure no one was coming towards us. "Why is this bothering you?"

He looked at me as though I was being completely ridiculous. I scowled back at his handsome freckled face.

"Why wouldn't it bother me?" I said, more quietly this time. "My best friend snogs me in front of the entire school and then acts like it never happened? You don't think that would affect me at all?"

I could feel my anger starting to crack, and sadness kicking in. It was degrading to think that Fred would do something like that to me and not have the decency to talk to me about it. He hadn't given me any sort of explanation. On top of that he thought I was being stupid about it. Tears started welling up in my eyes. I tried to force them away, ashamed of the fact that he was upsetting me as much as he was.

Fred's features softened when he saw the tears start to fall down my face and he pulled me into a hug. I tried to resist, but couldn't stop him from wrapping his arms around me. I didn't do the same to him.

"Julie, I'm so sorry," he said quietly. "I… I really didn't mean anything by that kiss…I was just excited. I got ahead of myself. I should have talked to you about it earlier."

I could feel the sadness wash over me in waves. I wasn't comforted at all by Fred's words. In fact, what he said made me cry even more. That had not been what I had wanted to hear. It couldn't possibly be true. It couldn't be. He was the one who had feelings for me. Why all of a sudden was he deciding it was a spur-of-the-moment thing that had no meaning?

Unless…

Unless he had fancied me until the day of the match. Maybe he had had feelings for me all along, but after the kiss he had realized it had all been a mistake. Maybe the kiss had the opposite effect on him as it did on me. While it had made me—dare I say it—want to be with him, it had instead made him decide he didn't want to be with me.

I could feel the tears coming down harder. I couldn't stand there anymore. I had to leave.

I broke away from Fred's grasp so suddenly that he didn't have time to pull me back. Before he could catch a glimpse at my tear-stained face I turned and sprinted back to the Gryffindor tower, ignoring Fred's voice calling me back. I couldn't look at him right now. I didn't want to look at him.

I entered the common room and saw George and Lee seated by the fire. They grinned at me at first, until they spotted the state I was in.

"Jules… what happened?" George said, getting up from his seat quickly. Lee followed suit, but I was already heading up the stairs to the girls dormitory.

"Juliet?" I heard Lee call, but I ignored them both.

I stormed my way into the dormitory, spotting Alicia sitting on her bed with a book in her lap.

"Hey Jul—what's wrong?" she asked, dropping her book and coming towards me as soon as she caught sight of my face.

I wiped the tears hastily from my face. Being away from him had caused my anger to return. I didn't want to cry over him. It made me feel weak.

I sniffed and wiped the tears onto the sleeve of my jumper.

"It's Fred," I answered Alicia. It didn't make much sense to hide it from her. I flopped myself down onto my four-poster bed and looked up at the ceiling.

"Fred?" she asked, sounding concerned. "What did he do?"

I groaned.

"What the hell is wrong with him?" I said, sitting up at my bed and glaring at the wall as if he was standing in front of me.

"What do you mean?" Alicia asked.

"He's being a right prat!" I yelled, fingering the wand inside the pocket of my jumper.

Alicia eyed me warily.

"Well that's no surprise," Alicia said in an attempt to bring humour to the situation. It didn't do much good. "Tell me what happened."

"Ok," I said, trying to calm down so I could explain myself. I took a deep breath, blowing the loose pieces of auburn hair out of my face and straightened myself up on my bed. "I confronted him about the kiss," I said, feeling much better. It helped that I was speaking to a normal person rather than being face-to-face with the idiot Weasley.

"You did?" Alicia asked, sitting back down on her bed and staring at me intently. "What happened?"

"He thought it was a right laugh that I was so upset over a silly kiss," I told her darkly. "And then he told me… what was it? Oh yes, that it didn't really mean anything, and he was just excited."

Alicia frowned, looking deep in thought. She eyed me carefully before she spoke next.

"And that upset you?" she asked me hesitantly.

"Well, yeah!" I said. "First he full-on flirts with me, then he snogs me in front of the whole bloody school, and then he acts like we're best friends again and nothing even happened. Wouldn't that upset you?"

Alicia snickered. I stared at her, confused and a little offended. It was one thing for Fred not to take me seriously, but Alicia was at least supposed to side with me if I confided in her.

"What?" I snapped, feeling irritated again. "You can't tell me that wouldn't piss you off."

"Sure it would upset me," she answered. "I don't think it would make me cry, though. I don't think I'd be that upset about it."

"What is that supposed to mean?" I asked bitterly, staring at her in disbelief. Was she honestly saying she agreed with Fred? That I had been overreacting about the whole thing?

"Well…clearly you're just upset about this because you fancy him," she said.

"That's ridiculous Leesh," I said scoffing. "So what if I do fancy him? Even if I didn't I'd still be upset."

"Would you?" she asked pointedly.

"Of course I would!"

"Think about it, Juliet. If none of these little flirtatious games between the two of you had been going on and he had snogged you, what would you have done?" she asked.

I didn't answer.

"I'll tell you what you would have done," she said, ignoring my silence. "You would have smacked him right across his face and called him a cheeky bastard."

I grimaced, recognizing the truth in Alicia's words.

"There's no way you would have run up here crying your eyes out," she continued. I fought the urge to protest that I wasn't crying my eyes out. I knew that I had been.

"What's your point?" I asked defiantly.

"My point is you can't be furious with him over this," she said reasonably. "From his point of view he was just being goofy Fred Weasley, messing around with his best mate. It's only because you fancy him that you're fussed about it."

I felt my heart ache, because something inside me told me she was right.

"No," I said firmly. "There's no way on earth I would ever fancy that smarmy piece of shit."

Alica frowned. We both knew it was a complete lie. "That was a little harsh," she said.

"Why are you defending him?" I snapped. "You know what? Get out!"

"Jules—"

"No, Alicia," I said. "Go."

Alicia didn't say anything as she got up out and left the room. She didn't seem angry or upset, probably because she knew that I wouldn't be mad at her forever. Plus, it was Fred whom I was really pissed off at, not her.

I felt guilty almost immediately, and almost called Alicia back as she exited the room, except I heard her run into someone.

"Oops, sorry Fred," I heard her say through the doorway.

"Is Juliet in there?"

"She is, but she's fuming mad," Alicia said.

I heard Fred mutter something, but I couldn't make out what it was. Then he knocked on the door.

I didn't say anything.

I lay back on my bed and stared moodily up at the ceiling.

He knocked again, and then opened the door.

"Jules?"

"What do you want Fred?" I said bitterly.

"What is going on?" he asked, sounding genuinely confused. He made his way over to me and sat down on my bed. I looked up at him despite my desire to pretend he didn't exist, and was hurt to see that he really did look perplexed. But that didn't make any sense to me. If he truly was just messing around and the kiss had meant nothing, then why had he been imagining snogging me during the holidays? And why had he been dropping so many hints about fancying me?

"I'd like to know the same thing," I said.

Fred sighed. "Can we not start that again? Can you please tell me why you blew up at me," he asked. His voice was almost pleading.

"Why do you think?" I asked him. I sat up in my bed and looked coldly into his eyes.

"I don't know," he answered, "that's why I asked."

"Well if you don't know, then I don't want to talk about it," I answered. "Can you please get out of my room?"

Fred looked at me with a defiant expression.

"No, I'm not going anywhere until we get this sorted."

"Fine," I said, standing up. I marched out of the room without a backwards glance, although I was sure he wasn't going to go down that easy.

I heard Fred grumble as I headed down to the common room where Alicia and George were talking in whispers on the sofa. I sat down next to them, ignoring their looks of bewilderment, and waited for Fred to come back down. Sure enough, he did a few moments later.

"Would you stop doing that?" he snapped, approaching me again.

Alicia and George turned their attention to Fred, and watched in curiosity and silence and we continued to bicker.

"Doing what?" I asked.

Fred closed his eyes and ran his hand through his hair. The look in his eyes was desperate now. "Please, Juliet. Will you just talk to me?"

"I am talking to you," I told him. I didn't want to give him the satisfaction of knowing that the sad look he was giving me was dissolving my anger. "Perhaps you can't hear, should I speak louder?"

Fred just stood there for a moment, as if he was thinking of something to say.

"What's going on?" Lee asked, coming down the stairs from the boy's dormitory.

"No idea," George answered with a puzzled look on his face.

"Nothing," I said standing up, "I was just leaving."

No one protested this time as I got up and exited through the portrait hole door. Truth be told, I wasn't sure why I was running. Fred and I rarely fought, but when we did Fred was never known to back away from a fight. He was a resolver, and as much as I tried to put distance between us, I knew it would only be a matter of time before he cornered me and demanded we fixed up the mess.

I was storming furiously down the corridors with no destination, just the desire to get away from him, when I heard his footsteps approaching once more.

"Why do you keep running off?" he yelled, grabbing my arm.

"Maybe because I don't want to be around you," I yelled back, yanking my arm out of his reach.

"Can you just tell me why you're angry?" Fred asked, trying to keep his temper under control. It was one thing he was good at. If there was a problem, someone always had to remain level-headed. Fred clearly thought I was out of my mind, so he was trying to be the calm one. I wasn't sure if it was helping, or making me more irritable.

I shook my head. "You know why I'm mad."

"Not really," he said. "I know we snogged, and now you're yelling about it. But I don't know why."

I stared at him, feeling very suddenly like a child who had been caught sneaking treats after dinner. I knew very well that our fight was going to have to end. Fred and I couldn't stay mad at each other. We didn't function that way. He was my best mate. But I couldn't possibly tell him why it upset me so much that he had snogged me and forgotten it had happened. If it really meant nothing to him then I couldn't put myself out on the line like that. It was too uncomfortable… and yet, a part of me just wanted it to be out in the open.

"Just tell me," he said. His expression was kinder now. "You can tell me anything."

"I … I can't," I said, feeling the energy drain from me. The entire fight had exhausted me.

Fred shot me a defeated look. "Why not?"

I shook my head and I felt the tears starting to well up again. I tried to force them away but I couldn't.

"I can't tell you…" I started, "because I don't know."

I looked down at my feet.

"What do you mean?" Fred said, trying to get me to look at him.

I shrugged pathetically. I knew that Alicia was right. The reason I was so upset over what Fred had said was because that's not what I had wanted him to say. I didn't want to hear that the kiss had meant nothing.

"I don't know why I got so angry," I said stupidly, staring down at my feet. "I guess I just…" I chanced a glance up at him and found myself saying the words I wanted to avoid admitting. "I thought maybe it meant something."

An awkward, lingering silence fell between us. I felt like the world's biggest idiot as we stood there, each of us staring at the ground. Then Fred stepped forward and placed his hand under my chin. He lifted my face and forced me to look into his eyes.

"Juliet, I'm sorry I upset you," he said quietly.

I nodded silently, not wanting to open my mouth. I was afraid if I started talking I would start to cry again.

"Will you forgive me?" he asked pleadingly.

I shrugged again and he pulled me into a hug.

"I don't like it when you're mad at me you know," he said chuckling a little.

I let out a half-hearted laugh and wiped my tears on my sleeve. My heart was sinking. I wanted nothing more than to return to my dormitory and curl up under the covers.

Fred pulled away and held me at arm's length.

"You know I don't intentionally piss you off," he said. "It just comes naturally. I'm really sorry."

I smiled despite myself and nodded again. All I had to do was hold on until I was out of reach from him, then I'd be free to wallow in self-pity for a while.

"Come on, let's head back before we get ourselves a detention from Filch."

I nodded half-heartedly and allowed Fred to tug me back to the common room where I inevitably fell asleep feeling more miserable than I had in a long time.

A/N: If you've reached the end of this chapter and noticed there aren't any more, please do not fret! This story was previously complete, but I was unhappy with the way it turned out. I am currently re-writing the remaining three chapters and I WILL have them up and this story finished (for good this time) within the next week (perhaps two). Put the story on your alerts so you don't miss the brand new chapters. I will be posting soon, I promise!

As always, please leave me a review so I can really appreciate all of the support you give me.