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The ridiculous disappearance of Subject and Sokka
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Subject has his fireflakes back.
Sokka, while looking for the seal jerky he knows I am saving for special occasions (he still hasn't found it. I am so wily) stumbled across the hidden compartment that I found the other day and discovered Subject's fireflakes instead. To Sokka they were just as good a snack as anything (Why brother? Why?) and he proceeded to eat them in tiny but steady amounts as opposed to Subject's giant fistfuls.
This was how Subject found him. Sitting with the fireflake bag in hand with the fireflake crumbs of guilt around his mouth. Subject was most perplexed and vaguely irritated. Subject now believes that Sokka is the one who made off with his fireflakes and has stated that next time Sokka should just tell him that he's taken them because Subject has been looking for days. Sokka protests that he didn't take them, but in a manner that makes him sound guiltier than he actually is.
Subject, just this morning was convinced that I had taken them (which I had, but Subject doesn't need to know that)and we had a small argument about this. Subject has now apologized to me for accusing me of being a fireflake thief and feels quite badly, if a bit confused about the whole misunderstanding this morning. Subject is one of the least apologetic people I know and an apology from him is rare. I have now gotten two apologies from Subject in three days! Go me! I decided not to set him straight and simply enjoy the apology as it happened. Subject owes me so many apologies that I will take what I can get.
I have been thinking that maybe Subject is okay really. I am thinking of relaxing my stalking regime because Subject isn't so bad. Some of the time. Most of the time he is still a jerk. But sometimes he is okay.
Things I learned about Subject.
Subject is capable of going three whole days without fireflakes and the world did not end.
Subject was not as mad at Sokka for taking the fireflakes to snack on them as he would have been at me for taking them out of spite.
Subject, when he feels that he is really in the wrong, apologizes quite sincerely. The hard part is making him feel that he is really in the wrong.
-!-
Another day stalking Subject. He has had his fireflakes back one day and has consumed about three days worth in one sitting. He says it is to get the lingering taste of seaprunes out of his mouth. Hardy har har Subject. The joke will be on him when he runs out of his favourite flake. They are already almost gone. What will I do to get back at him when I cannot hide his fireflakes? Something to ponder on.
Hide his Dao swords?
Unmatch all his socks? And then re-match them with the wrong pairs?
Put too much salt in his food?
Tell him the Duke is playing with knives again and just watch his panicked face?
Get Teo to ask him to explain the extremely complex firenation governmental system again? (Teo asked once, in honest curiosity, but after two hours of painful explanation and three pie charts that Subject drew himself on the wall, Teo wheeled away in bewilderment.)
Subject is getting more comfortable with everybody and no longer seems vaguely nervous in group situations. Previously, I admit, I may have tried to make him feel slightly unwelcome in group situations, notwithstanding the great sea prune debacle. Apparently everyone except me and Sokka felt vaguely nervous that dinner.
Subject has made tea for everyone again. Though it pains me to praise anything subject does, he does make the best cup of tea out of all of us. Is this something he picked up working in that teashop? Subject has also taken to attempting to tell jokes this evening. I do not know why.
Subject fails at jokes.
I have been sarcastic about Subject's ability to joke. Subject excels at sarcasm. He should stick to that. Sokka pulled him aside, presumably to teach him a joke or how to be less bad at jokes or to tell him to stop with the jokes. I hope it is the latter.
Things I have learned about Subject.
Subject can make a lovely pot of tea.
Subject cannot tell a joke.
Despite this, Subject still tries and fails to tell jokes.
Subject hit a smile record today. I counted nine smiles (I got two) and I wasn't watching him the whole time (because I am relaxing my stalking just a little.)
-!-
The next day…
-!-
That's it! I am never letting Subject out of my sight when he gets back! He is sneaky and wily and prone to absconding without telling me!
Subject is gone!
Again!
And so is Sokka!
Subject just makes things disappear; Toph's obstinacy, Aang's avoidance and my commonsense all disappear around Subject. Now Subject has disappeared my brother!
They have left a note of lame excuses that says they are going fishing.
They are so obviously not going fishing. Nobody sneaks off to go fishing in the middle of the night. Nobody needs to go fishing that badly!
Can Subject even fish?
Who, out of Subject's evil, homicidal and most likely inbred family would have taken him fishing? Certainly not his Uncle. I know Toph thinks Subject's Uncle is just the most awesome guy ever, but that guy didn't strike me as super outdoorsy. Indoorsy and tea loving-yes, outdoorsy and fish loving-no. On a fishing trip, Subject's Uncle would most likely bring a big pot of tea, espouse some wisdom and make some jokes. No actual fish would be caught, because catching fish would not be the point of fishing with Subject's Uncle. They would be trying to catch the fish of wisdom and metaphor. Voila Fishing with Subject's Uncle.
Who does that leave? His evil dad? I'm sure Ozai would have found some was to make fishing evil and full of pain. He probably would have killed a few people on the way, drowned a few baby rabbiroos for shiggles and then poisoned all the fish and called the trip a success. Viola Fishing with Ozai!
Is Sokka teaching Subject to fish? Is this a male bonding thing? Sokka will definitely make fishing painful. He is the guy who's had two fish hooks in his thumb after all. I am sure, that if this is the case, it will all end with one of them giving the other one a noogie…and there will be an inelegant struggle… and then both of them will fall in… and scare away all the fish. Voila fishing with Sokka.
Why did they not ask me to come along? I am better at fishing than Sokka and I am a waterbender.
Or maybe this is not a fishing trip at all. Maybe this is all Subject's idea and I will not even be able to fathom the depths of its deviousness. Because Subject is all kinds of devious. It just goes to show you. I loosen up in my stalking of Subject for one day and he absconds with my brother. You give Subject an inch…
I really I thought after the other day that in the orchard that Subject wouldn't do sneaky things in the future and I wouldn't have to watch him so closely. I mean we really talked! If he was going to run away with Sokka, I thought he would have at least told me. Sokka is my brother and he is my Subject and now I don't know where they are. I am very cross.
When Subject returns he is in so much trouble. I may even consider tying a bell round his neck, like Toph had on her flying pig Meng back in Gaoling.
Things I learned about Subject:
Subject is far sneakier than I realize.
Even Subject's written excuses are lame!
Subject's handwriting, however, is quite neat. This does not counteract the lameness of the excuses by any means.
-!-
Second day without Subject and Sokka. I am strangely listless without his annoying, proud, jerky self to follow around. I have been through Subject's stuff looking for clues to their whereabouts. Found no clues, but one shirt that needed mending. I have mended it. Now I am at a loss with what to do with myself. Will bother Toph again.
-!-
Some time later…
-!-
To pass the time I decided to bother Toph about Subject again. She is too friendly to Subject. She is always talking with him and making him laugh and I am sick of it. I have begun to suspect that Toph has a little crush on Subject. Why else would she always be following him around! Why else would she make him carry her everywhere? She can walk fine!
Toph laughed her arse off at me.
Toph alleged that I am the one with the crush on Subject.
Toph is crazy.
This is ridiculous. Who would have a crush on Subject? He is moody, temperamental , stubborn as all hell, eats fireflakes by the bucket load so if you ever kissed him he would taste like one big giant fireflake and I hate that taste and… he is prone to bouts of wallowing and dramatics and….. he is a jerk and…. he disappears when you least expect it and he takes your brother with him when he does….and he has stupid hair!
All I feel for Subject is a deep sense of mistrust and annoyance.
I do not miss Subject and his Subject-ness.
At all.
Things I learned about Subject:
Close proximity to Subject is making Toph stupider/ delusional.
-!-
Third day without Subject and Sokka.
Toph is training Aang in earth bending most vigorously with Haru "helping". Haru really wants to learn metal bending from Toph because he thinks it is the coolest thing ever. I think Haru has taken to stalking Toph. She is a bit stand offish with him and always knows when he is following her, which is most of the time. He follows her around adoringly. I think it is sweet.
She does not like it.
Haru offered to carry her around now that her two favourite Toph-carriers are absent and she was horrified. Apparently she only wants lifts from Subject or Sokka. She has asked me to give Haru something to do so he stops stalking her. She has asked him directly and bluntly many times, to no avail. I have told him to go off and look for bits of metal and then get Toph to teach him how to bend them. There is almost no metal in this temple so he will be gone for ages.
I think it will be hilarious when he comes back and presents Toph with his gift of metal.
I am so wily.
The Duke also went through Subject's stuff because he wanted to 'have a go' with Subject's Dao blades. The Duke has cut his hand open. Subject keeps them in good nick and they are ridiculously sharp. The Duke just touched it, apparently, and it cut his hand. I do not believe the Duke just touched it, but I have healed his hand (he was most fascinated by this) and hidden the Dao blades out of the Duke's reach. And also Haru's. They are made of metal after all.
Have hidden Sokka's space sword as well, just in case.
Teo is now helping Haru look for metal.
But all of us are starting to wonder what happened to the boys. I hope they are okay. I just have no idea. Where did they go? They better come back with the most enormous fish I have ever seen to justify all this worry that I am doing on their behalf.
Things I learned about Subject:
Subject is as meticulous about taking care of his swords as he is about everything else.
-!-
Fourth day without Subject and Sokka.
I am really worried now. Where are they? What are they doing? Who's idea was this? I bet it was Subject's and I bet it is a stupid idea. Aang says that I shouldn't worry so much. Aang believes that Sokka and Subject will look after each other and will be back tomorrow.
Aang has abandoned the various firebending tasks that Subject has set him. Aang says that Subject is not here to make him do it and what Subject doesn't know won't hurt him and he wants to go gliding with Teo. I have urged Aang to try practice without Subject and to show some initiative etc. I have eventually told Aang that Subject will most definitely know that he has not been practicing (because either myself or Toph will tell him) and will be very cross and give him a Subject-scolding when he gets back.
Toph is hiding from Haru at the moment. It is adorable. Haru has taken all the spoons from the kitchen, as according to him, they are the least useful utensil and can be sacrificed on the great altar of learning metal bending. He is carrying them around in a pillow case as he looks for Toph, so she hears and feels him coming a mile away. Even I can hear him a mile away and I do not have Toph's super hearing. He will never find her at this rate.
Aang is very reluctantly doing fire squats at the moment.
I miss Sokka.
I still do not miss Subject.
Not even a little bit.
Not at all.
So there Subject.
Things I learned about Subject:
Less than nothing!
-!-
Fifth day without Subject and Sokka.
Sokka and Subject are not back. I am really worried about Sokka and Subject now. I am not even paying attention to everyone else's shenanigans because I am so distracted.
I cannot even write I am so tense. I have rearranged the kitchen cupboards twice. Subject and I had a small argument about this on that day that we rearranged the kitchen. Subject wanted to arrange them in order of use (the chillies would have prime place according to Subject) and I wished to alphabetize. I won.
Today I have rearranged them in order of use, but I didn't like how it looked so I put it back the way it was.
Then I had a small cry of frustration and worry
Where are they?
-!-
Later that evening…
-!-
Subject and Sokka are back! With my Father and Suki and some random beefy guy called Chit Sang. They went to prison! Prison! Trust Subject to get my brother locked in prison. Everyone has busted out of prison together and they are one big group of prison escapees who have in-jokes and a big shared experience of adventure. They have turned up in a giant airship which we will have to hide or destroy somehow.
There is much rejoicing.
My father is back. Me and Sokka have our dad. We're a family again and it's all too much. I just can't believe Dad's here and it's just wonderful. I have no words. I'm just… I don't know. What is this feeling? I just feel happy and surprised and elated and so many things.
Less wonderful is the fact that Dad has taken a liking to Subject. He has described Subject as a good lad, which is such a Dad phrase, though it is completely inaccurate. He likes Subject for his loyalty to Sokka and for his ability to think ahead. This has something to do with gondolas. Subject has never thought ahead in his entire life and I am unclear as to how he did this on a Gondola.
I am unclear as to what actually happened at that prison. Their escape story was told with much enthusiasm and hand gestures by Sokka, but what I imagine is a little exaggeration. There is no way they have giant freezers made of ice in a fire nation prison and no way Subject would willing volunteer to be thrown in one for an indeterminate amount of time. Subject hates the cold.
Suki has also been rescued from prison and Sokka is absolutely over the moon. Oh. No pun intended. Sokka is quite joyous. I like Suki. I think she is good for Sokka, so I am glad too. I am also glad to have another girl around my own age in the group.
I have no opinion on the beefy inmate Chit Sang, except that I find it hilarious when he corrects Subject's grammar. This annoys Subject very much, so carry on Chit Sang. Chit Sang has also made the others stop at a town so that they could get a rather large quantity of Sake to celebrate sweet, glorious freedom. I am about to cook a big feast to welcome everybody back, also to celebrate sweet glorious freedom.
Subject looks strangely fetching in his prison uniform. It is most distracting.
Am I a weirdo for thinking this?
While I did not miss him at all, I am quite happy he is back. But I haven't had much of a chance to chat to him because of cooking and reuniting with my dad and Toph.
Toph is sticking to Subject like glue at the moment. Haru is still vaguely nervous around Subject and leaves Toph alone about the metal bending when she is with him. (She eventually relented and did try to show him with the spoons yesterday, but he needs to work on his concentration apparently. I think he needs to work on not ruining all the spoons. But that is just me.) Subject is giving Toph a piggyback at the moment and she is chatting to him about all the cutlery based shenanigans of the past few days.
Things I learnt about Subject:
Subject adores Toph. I get the feeling she is the little sister he's always wanted, instead of the sister he actually got.
When Subject disappears, there is normally a reason behind it.
Subject and Suki have settled their differences re: Subject burning down Suki's village. I pulled Suki aside to ask her about it and she said the dreaded phrase. Subject is kind of cool. Humph.
Suki did add the caveat that this coolness is directly related to Subject being of assistance in their prison escape and also the fact that Subject is quite loyal to Sokka. This loyalty has redeemed him in Suki's eyes, as she is quite fond of Sokka herself.
Subject apparently let Sokka arrest him and throw him in prison so as not to blow both their covers.
Apparently, he gave Sokka a very rousing 'never give up just because you've failed before etc' speech when Sokka was feeling quite down and wanting to abandon the plan and not try to rescue dad? !
Not rescue dad?
There is much more to this story and I will find it out tonight. From someone other than Sokka, who cannot tell this story without using the phrase 'firebender slice!' and making a whooshing noise.
Subject's firebending does not go whoosh.
-!-
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Another frighteningly long author's note.
Lovely reader, you have made it to the end of The ridiculous disappearance of Subject and Sokka or the mad rantings of Katara when she has no Subject to follow around. Congratulations!
I have heaps of love for you!
Once again, enormous thank you to all you reviewers! I love all your comments and each of them had bought a smile to my face! So thanks so much lovely readers who review!
I've decided to finish up this stalking journal after The Southern Raiders (thematically it makes sense, this whole journal is about how sneaky Subject is and after TSR, Katara will trust him and they'll be friends and she won't feel the urge to stalk him.
But Don't Panic!
We will still go onwards to infinity and beyond. In a new fic. Katara will still record her thoughts in her new not-stalking-journal. She will be making an effort not to stalk her new friend and write constantly about him. But sometimes these things happen and her journal may become filled with Zuko observations. I'm sure we all understand.
The lovely Darkagainstlight asked me my thoughts on Zuko and Mai being Intimate: I think they would have gotten their nasty on together. They are two of-legal-age teenagers who are very into eachother. Mai's parents are back in Omashu, leaving her place available for intimacy. I really don't think Ozai would have been that bothered by what Zuko got up to, as long as he didn't have a royal mishap. So I think they would have been careful regarding that. As long as they used protection (and in my head cannon it exists in the avatar world and they use it) I'm not judging.
Bottom line: they were two consenting teenagers who had motive and opportunity. With Zuko and Mai, I do think there is this enormous affection for eachother, but it's not the stuff of lasting romantic love. Many reasons for this. I think thoughts of lasting-romantic-love can get pushed to the background when teenagers who are in the throws of instant-horny-lust are given motive and opportunity.
This chapter features some interactions between Haru and Toph. Mostly because I think Toph is absolutely awesome and if I were an Earthbender in the western air temple –looks at Haru –I would have taken to following her, praising her and asking her to teach me her awesome ways. Teach me what you know, oh great metal bender of awesome!
I wanted Toph to have a situation she couldn't just earthbend her way out of and confronting it head on does no good. And Haru's persistent adoration was one of those things. Even her telling him to feck off does no good. I just wanted an in-fic fanboy for her because I think her reactions to someone fawning all over her would be hilarious. Also Toph does like praise and recognition and so this is a be careful what you wish for thing for her.
Toph and Haru: Together they bend spoons! (and maybe later, fight crime?)
Katara: is a big worrier and I thought the whole time the boys were off at the boiling rock would have driven her crazy with worry. She's also in big denial in this chapter about how much she misses her favourite Subject. She tries to distract herself with other things but the worry and concern just bleeds through. She also lays most of the blame for the worry on Zuko, because I think it was a habit for her in these western air temple days to just channel all her negative feelings at him.
Sokka and Zuko and their bromance: I admit it. I flove it. I think they make a great team. Even though they are absent for most of the chapter, I tried to get certain aspects of their bromance across. I realize I have them talking a lot in previous chapters and having good rapport and this does sit 100% correctly with the awkward small talk scene on the balloon in the boiling rock. Which I also flove. I hand wave this by saying that neither of them are especially small-talky and previously there had always been something, an issue or a subject or a problem to talk about. They've been flying for who knows who long with no topic of conversation, no issue, or problems that is making conversation happen for them. just clouds. So they start talking about clouds, which naturally leads to talking about girls.
That's rough buddy.
Oh boys!
Also I think there must have been a bit of a time jump between the Boiling rock and the southern raiders. Mostly because I have so many shenanigans planned and I wanted to give Sokka and Katara more time with their dear dad.
Also that sake Chit Sang bought: will get drunk! Then we will have drunken shenanigans in the next chapter. The prison escapees have been through a near-gruesome-death ordeal. It just makes sense that they'd want to do something life-affirming and celebratory now that they are safe and out of prison.
I hope you enjoyed it lovely readers!
Reviews and comments are always read and appreciated!