A/N: Finally, our Bella's going to meet her beloved Jasper again! This is a monster chapter, closing on over 8000 words, so take your time! And there's gonna be some citrus, jsyk ;-)

Massive thanks to my lovely pre-readers, I love you both! Your input makes this story what it is - couldn't do it without either of you *kisses*

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SM owns - I just get to make them do weird and inappropriate stuff ;-)

Chapter 10

Finally Friday, and I'm wracked with nerves! Edward's genius plan suddenly doesn't seem as genius – I really just want to enjoy my time with Jasper, and not play games. I am this close to calling the whole thing off and canceling with Edward. In a fit of nerves, I press my number two speed dial, so he can talk me down some.

"Edward, help! I'm shitting bricks here!" I say, as soon as he picks up the phone.

"Easy there, everything's gonna work out just fine, sweetheart. Nothing to worry about, trust me." His smooth voice reassures me somewhat. "Tell you what – We don't have to play boyfriend/girlfriend – if he's anything like me or Tanya, just seeing you with another guy will be enough to ruffle his feathers."

"You sure? I don't want to ruin his visit and my chances – if he thinks I'm taken he'll act as the perfect southern gentleman. He'll back off to not hurt my feelings – that is, if he's even interested in the first place…" I trail off, unsure about this whole scheme.

"All the more reason to not overdo it. I'll just be your good friend, and cast some longing glances your way – if he's interested he should be green with jealousy at that. You just have to be your usual friendly self towards me, and not least towards him! Don't do anything out of normal, we don't want to make him suspicious and you DON'T want to give him any clues about your feelings! The point is to make him jealous enough to act on it, but not pissed off." Edward says – I can almost hear the glint in his eyes right now. He is really a cunning little devil, when he wants to be.

"All right, that's a plan. I can't wait to see him though. The butterflies in my stomach are going crazy!" I whine and can feel the tears welling up in my eyes. I'm as high strung as a violin string right now.

"Don't go all girl on me now, I can't take the tears – they are my kryptonite!" Edward says sympathetically, but with laughter in his voice. "See you in half an hour, sweetheart. I'll meet you at the parking lot."

"Okay, see you soon." We end the call, and I dart to my mirror to adjust the hair and minimal make-up I've applied. I also take some time to put on Jasper's favorite perfume that he got me for Christmas – Be Delicious, by DKNY. I love it too. It's fruity, light and sweet, but not too sweet. It suits my personality quite well, I think. I also put in the earrings he got me for my birthday last year –cute little hearts, dangling from a little silver hoop. All in all, I look good, with my favorite dark skinny jeans and a layered dark blue satin and chiffon top, with a simple black tank underneath. It's dressier than I usually wear my clothes, but since we are going out to dinner, I decided to make an effort.

Fifteen minutes later, after a desperate attempt to locate my missing ballet flat, I succeed and snatch up my keys and jacket. Here we go, ready or not, in an hour's time I'll see my Jasper again. I really hope he has on his uniform. I haven't seen it yet, the cheater hasn't even sent me any pictures! I wonder if he's been forced to crop his hair short – oh what a shame that would be. I've always loved his long curly dark blond locks. For years, I've dreamed about running my fingers through it in the throes of passion.

Edward is waiting beside Fred at the parking lot, as he said he would, and we're off towards Sea-Tac in a matter of minutes. I ask Edward to drive, since I'm so nervous that I'm shaking like a leaf. He willingly obliges – he's been begging for a chance to drive my truck since the first trip to Forks. Sooner than I expect, we are parking in the short term lot and jump out of the car. My legs can barely carry me, they feel like jello.

Inside the terminal, I immediately look at the board to see his flight status – so far it's on schedule, with only 15 minutes till landing. I pace back and forth like a caged lion and Edward laughs heartily over my antics, as he stretches out his long legs in front of him, sitting in the uncomfortable plastic seats. I keep watching the board, until it says that Jasper has landed. Then I switch to watching his gate, eager to see him appear.

Suddenly I spot a tall, lanky fellow, dressed in fatigues and mirror ray-ban aviators and with dark blond semi-long hair at the gates. Could it be? He looks so familiar yet different. But it is him, I can tell as soon as he spots me, because that brilliant, dimpled smile with his straight white teeth lights up his entire face at the sight of me. He breaks out in a half run towards me, and as soon as he is within 10 feet, he flings his duffel bag of his shoulder and drops his guitar case to have his arms free for me. He grabs me around the waist with his big hands and hoists me in the air, before hugging the life out of me.

As soon as I am in his arms, I feel like I'm home. His familiar cedar and fresh hay scent with a touch of citrus hasn't changed. His warmth and the sound of his heartbeat is the same. His humming and sniffing the skin behind my ear is new though – he was never quite this affectionate before. Always warm and friendly, but this feels new. This feels like lovers reuniting. I close my eyes and hug him tightly with my arms around his broad shoulders and my nose buried in his neck, like his is in mine. I don't know how long we hug like this, but it feels too short. If I could, I would surgically attach myself in his arms and never leave.

After a little while I suddenly feel his warm lips on my neck, giving me small butterfly kisses. His lips lightly trace the skin over my pulse point, so faint that I can barely feel it, but it's there, and it certainly wakes up the butterflies in my stomach again. What does this mean? He's kissing me? Oh wow, I never dared dream of this! Too soon he lifts his head up straight, and looks me in the eyes. His deep forest green eyes, with little yellow specks and darker around the edges bore into mine, and they look so happy! They shine with unshed tears and seem to say so much; I just can't figure out what. I return his smile with my own, and all is right in my world. I have my Jasper in my arms.

"Hi Jelly-Belly. Still as light as ever, I see." He says, with his warm baritone voice, slightly husky from emotion.

"Hi," I whisper quietly, "God, it's so good to see you."

A throat clearing behind us brings me back to reality, Edward is waiting and I have a part to play – even if it feels kind of redundant now, I still want to know for sure what Jasper's little kisses meant. Jasper slowly releases me and lets my feet find the floor again. He wraps his big hand around my little one though, like he doesn't want to let me go. I have to introduce them now. I really wish I'd just come alone, so I could have enjoyed his embrace a little longer and not disturbed our twosomeness.

"Oh yes, Jasper, meet Edward – a very good friend of mine from the university. He's the one that helped me move my stuff that I wrote you about." Edward stands up from his perch on the plastic chairs and reaches out his hand to shake Jasper's.

"How do you do, Jasper? It's very nice to meet you." Edward's impeccable manners shine through, even if Jasper's eyes are shooting daggers at him right now. I guess he's not as pleased, even if he's trying to hide it with a strained smile that doesn't reach his eyes.

"I'm great, thank you; and likewise." Jasper shakes his outstretched hand with considerable force. I can tell because his knuckles are actually turning white, and Edward grimaces a little. It's kind of funny, this little showdown in the middle of the airport. The two gladiators here are equally built, almost the same height, though Jasper has about an inch on Edward, but diametrically opposite in coloring and demeanor. Edward is pale and dark haired with mild mannerisms and soft-spoken. Jasper is lightly tanned and fair-haired with southern charm and a certain air of cockiness about him. Both of them are unspeakably beautiful and easily candidates for a GQ photo-shoot.

"So, Eddie, I hope you've been treating my girl well?" Jasper says, with a tone of warning. My girl? What the hell? He's never, ever been possessive of me before. I guess Edward was right – he just needed some competition for him to reveal himself.

"As well as she deserves," Edward replies, "She was a great help in fixing me up with my girlfriend recently." Oh, so Edward decided that no more coaxing was necessary, did he? Hmmm, I'll have to talk to him about this abandonment of our plan. Surely, Jasper isn't that intimidating, is he? I guess Edward thinks so, or else he thinks that our suspicions are confirmed now. I would have liked to be a little more certain though, but it seems I'm on my own now! I shoot daggers at him with my eyes. Traitor.

The tension releases from Jasper's shoulders by this, and his smile turns genuine. "Oh, did she? That's my Bella – always there for a friend." He lays his arm over my shoulder and gives them a gentle squeeze. "What brings you here today, Edward? Are you and your girlfriend going out with us?" He asks a little confused.

"Oh, no – Tanya is at Northwestern, sadly. I'm just the driver – Bella wasn't too happy driving through rush hour traffic in Seattle, so I volunteered." Nice save, Edward – this could have turned awkward. "I was hoping you could drop me off at campus on your way to dinner?"

"Sure, I'll drive, Bella, if you're uncomfortable?" Jasper looks at me a little worried – I've never been afraid of driving in the city, and he knows this.

"Yes, please – I've been a little tired all day, and don't quite feel up to it. I couldn't sleep last night." I say with a wink to Jasper, he knows how excited I've been.

We proceed to pick up Jasper's discarded duffel and carry-on luggage from the floor, moving out of the terminal towards Fred. Soon we're off towards campus with Jasper behind the wheel and me in the middle seat. It suits me just fine – I can feel his body heat radiating of him and I'm close enough that I can breathe in his intoxicating scent. I'm content and drunk off Jasper right now, not even present enough to follow the guy's conversation. We drop off Edward, but I don't move from my place next to Jasper – I'm not ready to separate even an inch from him right now. I don't think I'll ever be.

As we pull up to the restaurant, Jasper jumps out and runs to my side of the car, helping me out, before the valet has a chance. He takes my hand, gently, and steadies me as I jump down. His other hand finds purchase on my waist, as he looks me deeply in the eyes. His eyes are still alight with happiness, and it seems like his smile is a permanent fixture on his face.

"Ready to head in, Gorgeous?" He asks me, while grabbing my jacket on the seat behind me, carefully draping it over my shoulders.

"Yes, please, I'm starving!" I keep my hand inside his and drag him towards the restaurant doors.

"Yes, ma'am!" he laughs heartily, and follows me to the hostess stand. The hostess is not so subtle in checking him out, while completely ignoring me. Typical! Can't really blame her though – he is indescribably hot, in his uniform and with side cuts in his hair. It's a pity that the length has been reduced so much but I know it's a requirement – at least he's kept the length on top, only cutting of the sides. It gives him a bad boy edge that he didn't have as much before. Biased as I am, I can see how much of a hunk he is. He's always been to me, but now he's stepped up into a league of his own.

"Can I help you?" The snotty hostess says, only speaking to Jasper.

"Yes," I cut in, "reservations under Swan, table for two." I give her a pointed look, and she finally looks at me, apologetically.

"Certainly Ms. If you'll follow me, I've reserved you a table by the window over here." She leads the way towards a quiet table with a wonderful view of the waterfront. "Your server will be right with you."

We sit down; Jasper is acting like quite the gentleman, holding out my chair for me, before seating himself. Once seated, he reaches across the table and takes my hand again. This is beginning to feel like a real date – unlike the old days, where we would find a pizza place or a burger joint and goof around. Jasper is happy, but also somewhat solemn. A whole different side of him is appearing that I've never been privy to before. I like it, while still missing the old Jasper. My Jasper. I know he's still in there, but for now I'll wait and see how this plays out. See if I can figure out if he really has feelings for me, or if it's his overprotective side come out to play.

"Hello, I'm Sherry, your server for the evening. What can I get you to drink?" Our server is a girl my age, with long blond hair and blue eyes. She seems very nice, and doesn't focus too much on Jasper, while handing us our menus.

"I'll have a sweet tea, what about you Bella?" Jasper says, and looks at me.

"I'll just have ice water, please."

"Very well, I'll be back in a bit with your drinks and to take your order." The waitress disappears, leaving us to peruse the menu. I quickly decide on mushroom ravioli that seems quite delicious. Jasper wants to try the chicken parmesan, ordering both the dishes when Sherry returns. We sit for a while in companionable silence, just enjoying each other's presence. After a little while, Jasper clears his throat and starts to speak.

"Bella, I wanted to talk to you about something. Something I couldn't just write in a letter or an e-mail." He trails off, looking imploringly at me.

"What is it, Jazz? You know you can talk to me about anything." I reply, giving his hand a comforting squeeze.

"In the time we've been apart, I've realized something. I realized that I –," He gets interrupted mid-sentence by the arrival of our food. We sit patiently waiting, while Sherry arranges our plates and disappears again.

"You were saying? What did you realize?" I ask.

"Nothing, just – forget it, it's not important." Jasper says, blushing. I've never EVER seen him blush before, and now my curiosity is peaked. What could possibly make my cocky, self-confident best friend blush? Oh my GOD, I hope he hasn't found a girlfriend. That would simply devastate me. I begin to shake a bit, feeling queasy by the mere thought of Jazz with another girl. He notices that I'm suddenly green and sweaty, concern marring his features.

"Bella, what's wrong? Are you okay?" He asks, wrinkling his brow.

"No, Jazz, I'm not alright. What were you trying to tell me before? Please, just tell me. I can't handle not knowing." I know I sound like a baby, and I'm ashamed of myself, but I need to know. I'll run out of here crying and believing the worst otherwise. His blush returns, and he seeks out eye contact with me, opening and closing his mouth a few times.

Suddenly, he blurts out; "Bella, I'm in love." My world crashes down on me, and I begin to hyperventilate. My worst fear has just been confirmed. He's in love with somebody else. I can't stop a tear from trailing down my cheek, and my lips begin to quiver. How humiliating this is! I can't even hold it together long enough to get to the bathroom!

"Bella, Bella – I'm in love with you!" Jasper desperately pleads, squeezing my hand so hard it hurts. What did he say? With me? Did I just imagine this, or did he really mean it? I look into his sad eyes, so filled with worry and fear of rejection, and burst out in laughter.

"With me, Jasper? Really?" I can't breathe for my tears, laughter and relief are washing through me all at once. My Jasper is really MY Jasper after all. I can't believe this, but one look in his eyes confirms it all for me. It's true. He sitting in his seat, nodding and smiling, still with a hint of trepidation on his face – oh, right, I didn't say it back! He still doesn't know how I feel about him. He really went out on a limb here, and I am just laughing and crying. He must not know what leg to stand on right now. I better reassure him.

I stand up, not letting go of his hand, and walk to his side of the table. Bending down towards him a little, lifting his chin with my fingers and say; "I love you to, Jasper Dean Whitlock. More than you'll ever know." And then I kiss him. I let my lips meet his perfect, pouty lips, softly. He tastes so good and his lips are soft like velvet, yielding, yet firm against mine. Just one kiss I give him, in the middle of the crowded restaurant, before I go back to my own seat and start to eat like nothing's happened.

Jasper sits dumbfounded across from me at the table. His mouth is hanging open a bit and he has a glazed look in his eyes. In a minute I suspect he'll start drooling, if he doesn't snap out of his haze. I snap my fingers in front of him. "Jazz, eat something. Your food's getting cold." I can barely contain my laughter. The whole world just aligned and I'm giddy, shoveling my ravioli into my mouth.

"Oh I'm sorry, Bella! Yeah, I should eat." He replies, and starts to dig in, still dumbfounded, but now with a silly grin on his face. Apparently, I'm not the only one that's giddy here tonight. I've never seen Jasper this way, all flustered and happy. It's really amusing, but I'm also enormously happy, since I know that his reason for being this way is ME. I now know that he is just as head over heels for me, as I am for him.

We keep throwing each other looks through our meal, not saying much, just looking at one another. I'm not sure how to act now that we've confessed our feelings. Are we still the old Jasper and Bella? Or are we something else, something more? We have a lot to discuss, but it will have to wait till we're alone, which will be hard since Beck will be at the dorm, waiting for us. She convinced me to drag Jazz to the dorm-party, to let him have a 'full college experience'. Knowing my Jazz, he'll have a great time, and in my latest e-mail, I did ask him to take me for a walk on the wild side, as he is so good at.

When we finish, Sherry turns up again, asking if we want dessert. We take one look at each other and decline, asking for the check instead. Jasper snatches the folder before I can, and gives me a reproachful look.

"Like hell you're going to pay on our first date, Darlin'! I wanna treat my baby right, and you're not gonna fight me on this." His southern drawl comes out to play, like it only really does when he's chastising me, really happy or really angry. He's born in Texas, but was raised in Forks since we were three (and met each other at the playground) but he spent almost all of his vacations in Texas at his grandparent's house. His Gramps and Gran are responsible for his southern manners and charm - and for the accent. Swoon!

"Alright, you win." I decide to let go for once, and let him pay – if he really thinks of this as our first date, I don't want to argue with him. I just want to enjoy it. And the thought of him taking care of me admittedly makes me swoon. I'm rewarded by his huge, dimpled smile – if he keeps this up, I'm going to be reduced to a quivering puddle of Bella-Goo by the end of the night. My heart can only take so much cuteness. After signing the receipt and tipping our waitress, he escorts me out to the valet with his hand on the small of my back; protecting and possessive.

We drive back to campus holding hands the entire way. He hasn't tried to kiss me again, and I'm a little disappointed at that. I really want to feel his lips on mine again! But I cherish his large hand wrapped around mine just the same. I'm all warm and fuzzy at the thought that he's really mine now. My dream came true tonight, and I have trouble wrapping my head around the thought. For 7 years, I've pined for him, and now he's here and he's in love with me! He keeps looking surreptitiously at me, without moving his head, like he has to convince himself that I'm really here too. I catch his glance and smile happily at him, which he returns with his dimples on full display.

Finally we arrive at my dorm, and again he helps me out of the car. When I hit the ground, he lets his hands glide from my shoulders to my underarms and holds me lightly, while looking me deeply in the eyes. Once again, I'm lost in a sea of green warmth. He bends his head slightly and his lips meet mine this time. Soft, moist, strong lips; they move with my own in a dance as old as time. Tenderly, he takes my bottom lip between both of his and licks it; asking for entrance, which I happily grant him. For the first time, our tongues meet and now I can really taste him. His sweet mouth with a hint of spice and mint is pure heaven. Our tongues dance together and the warmth spread through my entire body. My head spins and I feel like I'm floating.

My hands wander up his strong back, and glide into his hair; the hair that I fantasized about so many times. It's softer than I expected, it feels like silk between my fingers. He moans quietly into my mouth, which spurs me on, and I angle my head for better access. Now I'm the one to grab his lip between mine, licking, feeling, tasting him. His hands are at my waist, gripping me harder, but not painfully so; just right. They glide upwards a little, just brushing the underside of my breast, and I'm on fire now. I want it all - but not here; not in a parking lot. I break away for air, and start kissing down his neck, still licking and tasting the salt of his skin. He tastes wonderful everywhere. He sucks on my pulse point and moves his mouth to my ear where he sucks on the lobe; moaning again.

"Bella, we've got to stop. I want so much more, but not here and now. I want to enjoy it all with you. I've been waiting for this long; I can wait a little longer." He whispers lovingly into my ear.

"You're right. This is not the place. But we will continue this later." I say, breathless and panting. Reluctantly, I break free from his neck and look at his face. He is beaming – his whole face is lit up with a smile, his eyes are sparkling and his posture is relaxed. I don't think I've ever seen him this happy before.

"Sounds good," he said with a wink, "I really think we should talk also – discuss where we stand? I know where I want this to lead, but what about you? I know I dropped a bomb on you tonight, and I honestly didn't expect this to happen. I was so afraid that you'd turn me down and that things were gonna get awkward between us." He trails off, unsure of my reaction.

"Jasper," I look at him tenderly, "You didn't need to worry. I've been in love with you since I was 12 years old – I just never had the guts to act on it. All of the time you were with Alice, I was green with jealousy! I couldn't stand her – not because of the person she is, but because she had what I wanted most, and didn't even appreciate it properly. You. She had you, and you were all I wanted – all I still want. I know it's going to be difficult when you're away for training and in the future, when you get stationed somewhere and sent on missions and whatever- but I'll do anything I can to make this work regardless. I love you." I kiss him softly, sealing the promise I just made.

He grabs my hand and I lead him inside the dorm. The party is already in full swing and scantily clad people run up and down the hall, in and out of each other's rooms. Music is booming – different tunes from different rooms. It's an eclectic chaos, but it looks like a lot of fun. I drag Jasper up the stairs to my floor and guide him in our door. Our room is relatively quiet – Beck is still standing at the mirror, fluffing her hair around and getting ready to party. She has started with some partying though – an opened bottle of vodka stands on her nightstand, and she reaches out to take a swig directly from the bottle. Then she spots us and squeals.

"Bella! You're here! And wowza – who is this hunk of man-meat? You sure know how to pick 'em girlfriend!" She slurs half drunkenly. I blush from my head to my toes – why did she have to hint at my brief relationship with Edward now? "This is Jasper, Beck, you remember I told you about my friend from home coming to visit?"

"Oh yeah – I already arranged with Lisa that I could spend the night in her room and give the two of you some privacy. But you never mentioned what a hottie he was! You must have some strong pheromones, girl, the good looking ones flock around you!" She laughs heartily and sways a little. Jasper reaches out his hand to shake hers, and ends up steadying her in the process. He laughs at this as well, and proceeds to dump his duffel on my bed. His carry-on luggage consists of his guitar case. I've never seen Jasper travel anywhere without it. It's such an integral part of him – he can't survive without his music. Fortunately for me and the rest of his surroundings, he's really good at playing and singing! He opens his duffel and pull out a bottle of Jack – his drug of choice, and mine, when he lures me into it.

"A drink Darlin'?" he asks me with a raised eyebrow.

"Sure – let's celebrate!" I reply with a wink and a smile.

"Yeah, let's." The corner of his mouth turns up giving him a diabolical grin together with the lifted eyebrow. He looks absolutely adorable when he does this, and he knows it too. He deftly unscrews the cap and takes a big swig, before handing the bottle to me. After I take a drink of my own, he fishes out a white v neck tee with some tribal pattern on the front and a pair of frayed well-worn jeans from the duffel. His trusty belt with the enormous confederate flag buckle appears too. He turns towards me, gesturing for a place to change. I point him towards the closet. It's not big, but he should be able to maneuver in there. He grabs some cologne as well and slips inside to change out of his uniform. Pity – he looks absolutely edible in it!

I take a couple of drinks more and chat a bit with Beck, before she takes off to find Lisa and get her party on. Suddenly I feel a pair of strong arms around my shoulders, and Jasper's chin finds purchase on the top of my head. "Mmmmhh, you smell so good Darlin' – like strawberry shampoo and Bella. I love the way you smell." He says, inhaling deeply in my hair. I turn around and stretch on my tip-toes to give him a kiss. He returns it with vigor, letting his tongue slip into my mouth and his hands wander to my butt, gently cupping it. He breaks away after a while, panting. "We've got to stop this – we have a party to attend to."

I take a step back and drink him in with my eyes. Good God is he delicious! The long hair on the top of his head is tied back in a ponytail and his muscled biceps are clearly visible under the sleeves of his shirt. He's got a tattoo now – a cute little heart with 'Mama' underneath in a band. It's a real sailor's tattoo. The definition of his pec's and his taut stomach are enhanced by his tight shirt. It makes my mouth water at the thought of licking his abs later. I never had a physical reaction like this to anyone. Sure, I found Edward very attractive, but these kinds of thoughts are new for me. I feel a dull ache in the pit of my stomach by the idea of being physically intimate with him. I long for it.

"Sure – will you bring the guitar? I thought about sitting in the common area and hanging out. I don't know the other residents well enough to crash any of their rooms."

"I'd love to. Will you take the bottle, please?"

"Sure."

We head down the hallway to the big common room, hand in hand. People say hello along the way, and some do a double take by the sight of me with this handsome guy at my side. I guess they never expected shy, introvert Bella to show up with a hottie at a dorm-party. Ha! We grab a seat at an available love-seat and Jasper takes out the guitar and starts to tune it quietly. I chat with some of the girls that sit around and soon a small crowd has gathered around us, expectantly awaiting Jasper beginning to play something.

"I would like to start out with a classic," he says and winks at me – I can feel the mischief radiating from him, "Boss DJ, by Sublime." He starts laughing as I groan loudly. He then continues to strike the opening chords, singing obnoxiously, directing it straight at me. I blush scarlet and stick out my tongue at him. Very mature, I know. But I even though I hate the song, I still can't help but enjoy it – it's been so long since I've heard Jasper play in person, and his warm, husky baritone voice gives me chills up my spine. Furthermore, I enjoy it immensely because this is such a pivotal sign of our relationship. It assures me that we're still best friends underneath the newfound boyfriend-girlfriend status – if that's what we even are. We still haven't labeled it. We still need to talk about it, but for right now, I just live in the moment and cherish every second I have with him.

When the song finishes, I give him a lug on his shoulder in retaliation. He can't escape me here, and it's tradition that I take my revenge whenever he plays that song; be it by water gun, physical damage, itching powder or hiding his guitar pick, I've always done something to get back at him. He fakes hurt and winks at me again, before taking my hand and kissing it. Swoon – why must he be such a perfect gentleman?

Jasper continues to play, different songs and genres, but mostly classic rock ballads. He plays a couple of requests as well. I continue to drink from the bottle of Jack, and can feel myself getting more and more tipsy as the night progresses. I'm not downright drunk, but it's not far from it. Jasper announces last song for the night, and turns towards me;

"I want to dedicate this one to my love, my Bella. It's an old Foo Fighter's song, and it describes the way I felt the previous months perfectly. Times like these."

I am a one way motorway
I'm the one that drives away
Then follows you back home
I am a street light shining
I'm a wild light blinding bright
Burning off alone

It's times like these you learn to live again
It's times like these you give and give again
It's times like these you learn to love again
It's times like these time and time again

I am a new day rising
I'm a brand new sky
To hang the stars upon tonight
I am a little divided
Do I stay or run away
And leave it all behind?

It's times like these you learn to live again
It's times like these you give and give again
It's times like these you learn to love again
It's times like these time and time again

He lets the last note hang a little longer in the air, while looking me deeply in the eyes. As soon as the sound dies away, his lips are on mine – sweetly and appropriate for company, but still filled with so much emotion. I almost cry from it, brimming over with emotions myself.

Jasper stands up and gives me his hand to pull me up from the little couch – but I am severely unsteady on my feet from drinking half a bottle of Jack, so I stumble and almost fall flat on my face – I would have, if his hard chest hadn't broken my fall. His arms automatically lock around me, and we both burst out laughing. "Oh, Jelly-Belly, you never change, do you? Always clumsy; good thing I was here to save you this time, huh?" He sputters out between his heaving bouts of laughter. He hoists me over his shoulder and takes off out the door in half-run, me screaming my head off and pounding his back to make him put me down.

Outside is an abandoned shopping cart that he unceremoniously places me in, my feet hanging over the edge. "I'm gonna take you for a ride now, Sugar!" He bellows while driving me around the parking lot in the cart in a dizzying speed. "Whooo hoooo!" I can't decide whether to laugh or puke! It is so funny, and so typically Jasper, but my drunken stomach can't really handle this right now.

"Jazz, stop! I'm gonna throw up, stop now, please!" I shout as loud as I can. Slowly the cart comes to a stop, and Jasper hoists me up from my awkward seating. He steadies me with his arms around my waist and gives me a sweet kiss on my nose. "As fun as that was, I am too drunk to handle that right now, Baby," I let him know, "I think we should head up to bed now, and sleep this off before our trip tomorrow."

"You're right – four hours in a car with a hangover isn't gonna be funny – and you puking is a sight I can live without seeing ever again!" Jasper laughs, clearly remembering our first drinking experiments in his tree house when we were thirteen. He has held my hair a few times while I returned my meals in the woods behind our houses. He grabs my hand and we go inside to my room again.

Since Beck is gone for the night, we have it all to ourselves and as soon as the door clicks shut behind us, Jasper is pressing me up against the door, kissing my neck. His soft lips explore every inch of my skin and he continues down, kissing my clavicles, letting his tongue run along the expanse of each of them. Meanwhile his hands are busy getting acquainted with my breasts – softly kneading; caressing the outer swells of them, carefully avoiding my rock hard nipples. I can't help but moan, while pulling out his hairband so I can let my fingers back in those wonderful curly locks again.

He kisses down my cleavage, as far as he can reach for the fabric, giving the top of my breasts small licks, sweetly peppering them with kisses. He is so tender and loving, while still letting his desire for me shine through. I've never felt so cherished and wanted in all of my life. He is whispering his adoration for me, alternating with the kissing. "So gorgeous – never dreamed I would get you – love your taste – love your scent – love you, Bella." He lifts his head and kisses me hungrily on my mouth, gripping my lips between his, begging for access by licking the seam of my lips. I am only too happy to comply, eager to taste him again. Our tongues tangle and play – he is a phenomenal kisser, and I can't help but wonder what else he can do with that talented tongue. The idea sends a wave of heat through me and I can feel my underwear getting damp.

My hands glide down his broad back and I untuck his shirt, eagerly finding the smooth skin underneath. I can't wait to get it off of him, really feel him against me. He raises his arms as I pull up his shirt, allowing me to discard it and only breaking the kiss for the few seconds it takes me to pull it over his head. His hands also wander under the hem of my tops, feeling the skin of my sides for the first time. I also allow him to remove them – now only in my jeans and bra I'm more exposed than I've ever been with a guy. With anybody else, this would have lead me to feel uncomfortable and vulnerable, but with Jasper I feel completely safe and at ease. He looks adoringly at me, whispering how beautiful he thinks I am. I'm a melted puddle by his sweet words, so caring and adorable; his hair a mess, his lips swollen and pink and his eyes glowing in the faint light.

I lead him to my small twin-sized bed and let him sit against the headboard with his legs stretched out in front of him. I straddle them carefully, mindful of the rather prominent bulge beneath his belt buckle. Wow, I guess he's well endowed – not that I have anything to measure against, since I never dreamed of being in this situation with Mike, and with Edward it stopped before we ever got that far. Jazz's chest is proudly on display in this position, and what a chest it is! Defined pec's, begging to be licked, with just a tiny patch of dark blond chest hair in the middle, taut abs with a cute inwards belly-button over a slim happy trail leading directly underneath his buckle. Not to mention the clearly defined 'V' over his hip bones. Yum! I guess he wasn't exaggerating in his latest letter. Another tattoo takes me by surprise. In black handwriting, just above his left hipbone, it says "I'm lost…" I make a mental note to ask him about the significance of that later.

I can't help myself; I have to lick those abs! I start out by peppering his collar bones with butterfly kisses and small licks, just like he did to me, before moving towards his right pectoral muscle. I swirl my tongue around his hardened dark brown nipple, causing him to buck his hips and moan. Mmmm I like that reaction! I kiss my way over to the other one, giving it the same loving treatment, once again gaining the desired reaction to my actions. He's very responsive, holding my hips and giving them a tight squeeze. I let my tongue follow the grooves down to his stomach – I have to have a little taste. Each washboard abdominal muscle gets a lot of loving, before I sit up again, crashing my mouth on his. His left hand buries itself in my hair, holding my head in place while we kiss once again. His right hand has found my left breast, inching closer and closer to my straining nipple. If he doesn't touch them soon, I'm going to explode!

Finally his thumb and forefinger pinches my nipple gently, rolling it. I break free from our kiss with a gasping moan and arch my back, begging for more. He looks at me with half-lidded eyes, clearly just as turned on as I am. "You like that, Darlin'? You want more?" He asks me huskily. I can't form coherent words right now, so I just nod. "Can I remove your bra then, Darlin'? I really want to feel your skin, taste your sweet rosebuds." His southern drawl has really come out to play now. I guess I found a fourth instance where he can't hide it; extremely turned on Jasper. "Please." I beg eager to feel his skin on mine.

He releases my hair and deftly undoes the clasp on my back, causing the straps from my bra to fall to my upper arms. Gently he removes them and sets the puppies free. He gasps slightly, murmuring under his breath how fantastic tits I have. I can't help but chuckle – he is sweet and romantic, but still such a guy. After a short pause to admire my tits, he cups them gently in his large, calloused hands. Expertly rolling my nipples, he dives in and sucks on one of them. An electric tingling sensation shoots through me, directly connecting to my clit. I hadn't the slightest idea that this would feel so good! My mouth falls open, and I buck my hips against his straining bulge, eliciting another moan and buck from him. Oh My God, this feels amazing! I have never been this turned on in my life, and I just want more.

He moves his head to my other nipple and rolls the other with wet fingertips, while his free hand grips my hip and starts to guide my movements against him. It's a steady, gliding rhythm, hitting both of us in exactly the right spots. I'm a sweaty, moaning, horny mess and I can't control myself at all – tension is building and the tingling sensation in my crotch keeps building. Jasper licks and sucks my breasts, my neck, and my earlobe and finally kisses me fully on my mouth again. I gasp and grind on him uncontrollably, seeking both our releases. Finally, the coil in my belly releases, white spots dance behind my eyelids and I scream out, "Jazz! Oh God, Jazz!" before I slump against him. The moment I catch my breath, Jasper releases a grunt and a groan while going completely rigid beneath me. I guess he saw God too.

"Bella," he says, breathlessly, "that was amazing. You are so amazing. God, I love you!"

"Yes it was," I reply, equally amazed, "I love you too, Jazz. So much."

He gently lifts me off his legs and to his side, turning over to face me. He wraps his strong arms around me, caressing my cheek softly with his long fingers; tips calloused from years of guitar playing. He is studying my face, not talking, and just watching me. Adoringly he kisses my forehead, my eyelids, the tip of my nose, before brushing his lips gently on mine. "When I was away," he starts, "I read this quote that really nailed it for me: 'Of all sad words of tongue or pen, the saddest are it might have been', in a poem by John Greenleaf Whittier. When I read that, I knew that I had to make a decision. That I had to either carry on as usual with you just as a friend, fulfilling that quote, or I had to take a chance and tell you. I couldn't continue in limbo – I couldn't live that poem, saying that it might have been. I didn't want to wake up in an old folks home when I was eighty and never know if we could have had something. I decided to risk it all in order to win the greatest prize I'll ever win. I risked our friendship to gain you! And no matter what happens, I'll never regret it, Darlin'. You've made me the happiest man alive today. Thank you."

Tears are streaming down my cheeks, when he is finished with his declaration. I can't help myself – I am bubbling inside with all the unsaid emotions build up over seven years of pining, and now he just confirmed that he wants me just as much. "Jazz, I'll be forever grateful to you for taking that chance. I've been in love with you for so long, but too much of a coward to act on it. I'm so happy that you dared! I'm ecstatic that I finally have you. I'll never let you go now – I love you with all of my heart and I'll never regret it either. And I'll always be your friend too, no matter what. We were friends first, and I want to keep us friends as well as lovers. Don't you agree?"

"Yes, Darlin', I want that too; the best of both worlds." He smiles adoringly at me, dimples out again. I can't resist kissing them. "Should we get ready for bed? I really need to clean up the mess in my boxers," He laughs at me, "devil woman." I blush at this, "Sorry, let me get up and we can change for bed."

We get out of the bed and grab our individual sleepwear and toilet kits before starting towards the bathroom. I've pulled his shirt over my head and Jazz walks shirtless out the door, gaining many admiring looks along the hallway from my female co-inhabitants. In the bathroom, we each change in a stall, before brushing our teeth side by side, smiling like goofs through the toothpaste. Back in my room, we settle on the bed on our sides. I curl into his chest, nuzzling his chest hair with my nose and resting my head on his bicep. His hand has found purchase on my hip and our legs tangle together under my comforter. His nose is in my hair, and he sighs deeply. "Goodnight, Darlin'. I love you."

"Good night, Jazz. I love you too. So much." With that, I close my eyes and drift off to sleep, safely wrapped in the protecting arms of my love.

Please please please, let me know what you think! *wipes sweat from brow*