Ronnie sat down in front of the fireplace in Will's house. The sun had set early in the evening because of the storm and the house was dark except for the flames casting shadows on the walls. She had wanted to go back to her hotel room but Will wouldn't allow her to. He was worried about her getting sick from the storm. Most likely he didn't want her to get a bug that would make her lose another child. Ronnie bit her lower lip trying to keep the negative thoughts at bay. He had never come out and blamed her for the loss of their first child.
Fixing the pillow and blanket she had grabbed out of the spare bedroom, Ronnie made a small bed three feet from the fireplace and snuggled in. It felt odd being a guest in her own home. Or what used to be her home. Will had disappeared a half an hour ago mumbling that he needed time to think; which left Ronnie alone to mull over their conversation. It was obvious that Will was still angry about the divorce. Honestly she wasn't too thrilled about it either but life had happened and she just couldn't live with him anymore.
In the distance she could hear thunder, as the storm got closer to the coast. It hadn't been the most beautiful day but it certainly matched her mood. If her mother had only seen her in her hotel room she would have given Ronnie a stern lecture. It had been her mother who had told her to come tell Will about the baby in the first place. When the doctor had announced the fact that she was having a baby and not dying from cancer her mother had thanked the Lord profusely. Ronnie, on the other hand, had felt that this could be even worse. She would rather give her life than lose another baby. This thought had been the reason she didn't want to tell Will that he was going to be a father. Her first idea was to carry the child the nine months and then tell Will when everything was in the clear. That didn't go over very well with her mother though. Then she had wanted to write a lengthy email describing the situation but her mother had nixed that too.
A week ago her mother had cornered her and given Ronnie a plane ticket and told her it was time she told Will face-to-face. Twenty-four hours later she had made it to the hotel room where she had paced for hours figuring out how she was going to drop this bomb in his lap. If it weren't for her mother's voice in her head she would have hightailed it home.
"There are quite a few beds in this house. I'm sure one of them would be better than the floor."
Ronnie was startled by Will who had slinked in the room unannounced," I'm cold. The fire is warming me up."
Will leaned against the wall, keeping his eyes on Ronnie. He seemed to be analyzing her. His eyes drank her in and she felt heat building in her that had nothing to do with the fire. "You've been getting sick in the morning. That never happened with Emma."
"The doctor said it was normal and that every pregnancy is different."
"It that a problem since you are already underweight?"
Ronnie shifted the blankets growing uncomfortable with his question. "I know I'm not in the best physical shape right now but I am working on it. I have a nutritionist to help me."
"Ronnie, I need to know if you are okay. Did the doctor say anything about the miscarriage?"
"He doesn't think I should have any trouble," she answered. "Everything is going to be fine."
Will smiled at her," you say that but you are lacking conviction."
Ronnie laughed for the first time in months. It wasn't a big throaty laugh but it felt good. "I guess when you lose one child you lack the ability to feel confident in your child bearing abilities."
The smile vanished from Will's face and she wished she could take back what she said. Why did everything come back to that? "It's great that we are having a baby but I want to bring this baby into a world where it has two parents."
"Our child will have two parents. We will figure out how this is going to work as we go."
"No! That is not what I mean," Will yelled at her. "I think we should get married again. This divorce is stupid. I never wanted it in the first place."
Ronnie was silent not wanting to make him angrier than he already was. He had a right to be angry. Her anger and her hurt had been the reason she had filed for divorce but she hadn't stopped to think of his feelings. The betrayal he must have felt when she gave him the papers. She had stood in front of his family, a priest, and God; pledging to be with him through good times and bad times. But after Emma died she couldn't do it anymore.
"I wish, I'm sorry, was enough," she said feeling defeated. Will stepped out of the room and she could hear his footsteps on the stairs. Obviously they had things to settle between them.
Sunday brunch in the Blakelee household was hectic with Megan's kids running around the house trying to be louder than the other. Noelle was the older of the two and the spitting image of her mother. She had long legs for her age and blonde hair that was soft to the touch. Nick, on the other hand, had darker hair and the tendency to drive his sister crazy.
The minute Noelle spotted Ronnie the little girl ran at her at full speed and flung herself into Ronnie's arms. "Aunt Ronnie!"
Ronnie hugged the little girl enjoying the feeling of a child in her arms. "You get more beautiful every time I see you," Ronnie commented.
Nick came bounding up and smacked his sister on the leg. "You're it."
"Hey, little man. Where is my hug?" Ronnie knelt down and picked him up. Nick gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and then he wiggled out of her grasp.
Will said his hellos to the children then guided Ronnie out to the back porch. The warm air felt good on her skin. One of the problems of being underweight was that she was always cold. Her cardigan had become a staple in her wardrobe. The smell of grilled chicken filled the air and Ronnie felt her stomach heave. She paused, taking a few deep breaths to calm her grumbling belly.
"You okay," Will asked in hushed tones. He rested his hand on the small of her back.
"I'll be fine. My stomach is not happy this morning."
Will took her arm in his hand and turned her so that she was looking him in the eye. "If you don't want to do this today we can come back."
The thought was very tempting but she didn't want to wait to tell his family. "No, we need to get this over with."
Will's family was huddled near the pool with the grill smoking in the background. They were chatting amongst themselves and didn't notice Will and Ronnie. It was great seeing them again but the moment was probably going to be short lived. As soon as they found out she was pregnant they would turn on her for leaving Will.
"Ronnie," his mother was the first to spot them. She stood to her feet and enveloped Ronnie in a hug. "Megan told me you might show up." Susan looked her up and down as if to inspect her for any change. She tucked a stray strand of hair behind Ronnie's ear. "You've put on a few pounds since the last time I saw you. A couple more would make me very happy."
"I'm working on it mom."
"Can I make you kids a drink," Tom asked while heading over to the bar with his empty glass in hand.
"Not for me, thank you," Ronnie looked to Will with a knowing glance.
"None for me dad," Will added before sitting down beside his sister. "What is up with the cut on Nick's face?"
"He was abusing our cat and got clawed. The other cuts have healed up but the one that is left was a little deeper." Ronnie gave Megan a quick hug before dropping in the chair beside Will.
"How have you been Ronnie," Tom asked dropping a bottle of water into Ronnie's hands.
"Good. I took a teaching position which keeps me pretty busy." Ronnie tried focusing on Tom's face but felt her stomach heave again. Morning sickness was everything her mother had made it out to be. The only problem was it seemed to last through a good part of the day. Any scent from food could make her sprint to the bathroom to duck her head in the toilet.
"How are the students," Susan asked.
"They are amazing. I'm going to be sad when their teacher comes back from maternity leave." Ronnie turned her head and swallowed hard hoping to send the contents of her stomach back down.
"Gammy, can I go swimming," Noelle ran out of the house and attached herself onto Susan.
"Of course you can. Your swimsuit is in the cabana. Megan, can you open it for her."
Ronnie felt her face become flush and knew she wasn't going to make it much longer. "I'm going to be sick," Ronnie, whispered in Will's ear.
"The pool bath should be open. Let me go with you," Will stood to his feet and offered Ronnie his hand.
Reluctantly she took his hand and followed him to the bathroom. Her stomach did a final heave causing Ronnie to bolt to the bathroom, lift the lid, and empty her stomach. She felt Will lift her hair from her face. He rubbed his other hand in slow circles on her back till she was spent.
"You done," Will asked. When Ronnie nodded he pulled her to her feet and let her rest her head against his chest. He handed her the bottle of water Tom gave her so she could wash her mouth.
"Much better," she smiled up at him.
When Ronnie stepped out into the sunlight with Will she was surprised to see Susan outside the bathroom door. "What is going on with you two," Susan asked with hands on her hips.
"I think it's time we had a family meeting," Will declared. He guided both Susan and Ronnie back to their seats by the pool while the rest of the family sat down.
Ronnie felt an adrenaline rush surge through her. This was not going to end well. His family would take his side and Ronnie would be left to defend herself to the whole group. Could she even defend herself? She could remember all the reasons she had left Will in the first place but did that change when a baby was on the way.
"I want to know what is going on right now," his mother's stern voice sent a chill through Ronnie.
"I'm having a baby," Ronnie lowered her head not wanting to see the disappointment in their eyes.
"Tell me something I don't know," Susan shot back. Ronnie snapped her head towards Susan. "I've had three children of my own. There are signs."
"Are you guys getting married again," Megan interjected.
Will turned to Ronnie and she could see the pain in his eyes. "No. Honestly, we don't know what we are going to do."
"Raising a child with two parents is hard enough," Tom added. "Where are you going to raise this child? Will has responsibilities here and Ronnie, your job is in New York."
"The good thing about having a baby is you have nine months to figure things out," Ronnie answered. She reached out and took Will's hand. "I know this isn't easy for either of us but I'm willing to compromise."
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