The Highest Bidder

Chapter Twenty-Five: The Storm

I retreated to my quarters after speaking with General Iroh. Once more, the spirit Shen Si Ling had come up in our conversation. As much as I found it flattering that a spirit would grant me powers beyond my knowledge, I found it equally disturbing. To know that I was capable of protecting my family and friends while at the same time being able to hone power to kill my enemies, I wondered about my place in the universe.

Was I supposed to ultimately help the Avatar or was I meant to hang in the balance, always in the middle between good and bad? It sounded to me like the spirit, Shen Si Ling, was not just a specter over the mind, body, and soul; Iroh almost spoke of her as if she was my mother, somebody who was watching over me and protecting me when I couldn't bring myself to it.

So I meditated in my room to adjust my emotions, to detach myself from my worries and concerns in order to purify my thoughts. Things around the room startled tremble like they did when I meditated; the candles on my night stand floated out of their holders, and the flames danced to the rhythm of their vibrations. Even my bed hovered a few inches off the floor behind me. My bedroom door and my closet door opened and closed slowly with an eerie creak.

Lt. Jee interrupted,

"Commander Mura, I—"

As I anticipated, what Lt. Jee saw was an angel sitting in my room. What he described to me later was that Shen Si Ling was translucently sitting 'inside' me; angel wings sprouted from my back, according to his testimony. As quick as he had seen it, the spirit disappeared, and so did my concentration. My bed fell to the floor with a thud; the candles clattered in front of me on their table (their small flames blew out); and both doors swung shut. Lt. Jee opened the door to my bedroom slowly, mildly shocked.

"Commander," he said, stunned, "Prince Zuko has come up from the galley."

"Why are you telling me this?"

"He insists that you come on deck with him and General Iroh, as customary."

"There's nothing in our customs about synchronizing our schedules," I muttered irritably.

Lt. Jee didn't know what to say; he simply guided me out of the door.

When I came up to the main deck, Iroh was observing the horizon. Zuko was surveying the skies with a telescope. Lt. Jee remained below deck to tend to the crew.

Iroh sniffed the air in contemplation.

"There is a storm coming, Prince Zuko. A big one," he said.

Zuko lowered his telescope incredulously,

"You're out of your mind, Uncle. The weather's perfect. There is not a cloud in sight!"

"The storm is approaching from the north," said Iroh. "I suggest we alter our course and head southwest."

"We know the Avatar is traveling northward, so we will do the same."

"Prince Zuko, consider the safety of the crew."

"The safety of the crew doesn't matter!"

As he said it, Lt. Jee had appeared beside me, who clearly overheard Zuko's remark; his facial expression twisted unhappily. Zuko turned to see him, and he spoke purposefully; he walked up to him until his face was right in front of the Lieutenant's.

"Finding the Avatar is far more important than any individual's safety."

Zuko glanced at me swiftly before disappearing into the next room, closing the hatch behind him. Iroh came beside me and he turned to look uneasily at Lt. Jee, whose mouth downturned in steady aggravation.

"He doesn't mean that," said Iroh uncertainly. "He's just all worked up."

Iroh entered through the hatch to speak to his nephew. Lt. Jee turned to me.

"What did I tell you, Commander Mura? Was I not speaking the truth this morning?"

"Prince Zuko cares," I muttered. Even when I said it, I doubted my own words. "General Iroh is right. Zuko is just a bit worked up from tracking the Avatar's trail. We all are."

It wasn't an hour later that I took notice of the clouds forming north of our ship. They were the black edges of an ominous storm, and we were heading straight into it. General Iroh frowned at the sight before us. He set a hand on my shoulder. Apparently I couldn't betray my growing uneasiness about sailing into a thunderstorm; it wasn't for the lack of trying.

Lt. Jee noticed the rolling, Columbus clouds ahead as well, and so did Prince Zuko. Zuko walked on deck beside me with an evident, disapproving look on his face.

Iroh had been right after all.

Mentally, I begged for Lt. Jee to keep his mouth shut; however, the universe loved proving me wrong.

"Huh," said Lt. Jee, "Looks like your uncle was right about the storm after all."

Iroh stood in the background, overseeing an upcoming argument.

"Lucky guess," he said simply.

Zuko passed me irritably,

"Lieutenant, you'd better learn some respect"—he pointed at his chest with two fingers—"Or I'll teach it to you."

"That sounds familiar," I muttered quietly.

Zuko walked past the Lieutenant and came to my side; however, Lt. Jee could no longer contain his contempt for the prince. As he started to speak, I saw Iroh making decapitation motions with his hand, trying to head off the conflict before it could be too late.

"What do you know about respect?" said Lt. Jee harshly. "The way you talk to everyone around here from your hard-working crew, to your kind commander, to your esteemed uncle shows that you know nothing about respect. You don't care about anyone but yourself! Then again, what should I expect from a spoiled prince?"

Iroh sighed, and he put his hands over his face, resigning himself to the brewing disaster. Zuko's eyebrow twitched, stung by the accusations. He turned and assumed the Firebending stance; the Lieutenant followed suit.

Iroh held up his hands in a gesture for calm,

"Easy now."

Zuko and Lt. Jee crossed hands at the wrists, which indicated that the ritual of combat had begun. There was a sound on steel on steel, and smoke furled from where their arms met. Iroh strode in between them and broke their wrists apart in neat movement.

"Enough! We are all a bit tired from being at sea so long. I'm sure after a bowl of noodles, everyone will feel much better."

Prince Zuko and Lt. Jee glared at each other a moment longer then they both turned and walked in the opposite direction.

"I don't need help keeping order on my ship," said Zuko.

Iroh placed a hand on Zuko's shoulder, but he rudely shoved him off.

Zuko pushed pass me wordlessly, where I knew that he was heading to his quarters. I sighed inwardly, feeling pity and irritation wash over me as it was the usual feelings that I felt when Zuko was agitated. The storm clouds came to us in evident challenge.

"He knows that you understand him," said Iroh softly, as he, too, looked sad. "But he doesn't understand you."

"He doesn't want to hear anything that I have to say."

"Then convince him to listen." Iroh said certainly.

"He won't."

"If he truly loves you, truly, he will," Iroh said. He placed a finger under my chin to make me meet him at eye level. "He believes that you hate the Fire Nation, but he doesn't understand the battle in yourself to do what is right and what is easy. Talk to him."

"He won't talk to me."

"How can you know that if you don't try?" said Iroh in a fatherly tone. "I think it's time for the crew to understand why Zuko is the way he is. I will tell them the same details that I told you. Now you need to be what Zuko needs now: somebody that he can talk to without judgment."

Iroh gave me a gentle push in the right direction.

I walked to Zuko's quarters, though I wasn't sure why exactly I was going to talk about or what I wanted to say. I just knew that Lt. Jee had hit a nerve when he argued with Zuko up on deck; and if it were me, I would feel extremely angry.

So I did what I thought would appease General Iroh; I entered Zuko's room as quietly as I could and I just the door behind me. Zuko was sitting in a chair in front of four lit candles like the other times I had found him. His hands were balled into fists on his desk, and he glowered at the wall in front of him.

"Why are you here?" he asked quietly.

"To talk to you," I said timidly. I felt alarmed at his tone of voice and even more so when he didn't look at me. "Prince Zuko, I understand your pain; I know why you're high-strung all the time. You don't have to keep it bottled in, though. You have an uncle who cares about you. I care."

"How would you be qualified to tell me not to bottle anything in?" he said harshly, turning to look at me. "Why do you always defend Lt. Jee? Why are you defending everyone? They don't help you; they don't care about you. And you're always defending the Avatar too. Why aren't you on my side?"

"I am on your side; but you're not seeing the whole picture—"

"I see what I need to see." Zuko said, rising to his feet.

Frightened, I leaned against the door to separate us. The candles were the only light in the room, and as Zuko stood in front of me, I felt fear flicker in my eyes for the first time as he approached me, a yellow and orange silhouette in the darkness of his quarters.

"Lt. Jee thinks I'm a spoiled prince; well, what does he think of you? You're a fugitive of the law and a coward for not showing my father what you're capable of! Why couldn't you do what you should have done? It's not that hard! You just throw a few things at Azula and your father and mother would have been spared! You simply do things, Mura. It's not complicated." Zuko approached me. "You always come to me when I'm angry. Haven't you thought that perhaps I want to be alone when I walk away from you?"

I simply gazed at him, wondering why I decided to come to him in his lonely room; it certainly wasn't because I wanted to make him angry. Then I realized that my attempts to make him feel better only made the situation worse.

His words stung, and I didn't try to hide it.

"So," I said tenderly, "you still think that I'm a fugitive…"

"You are what you are, nobody can change that. Not even you." Zuko said with a wave of his hand. "My father banished you, so you are a fugitive."

"I wasn't banished," I said, annoyed. "I ran away."

"Before you could face judgment, which makes you a traitor too," said Zuko.

"You know what, you don't give me the respect that I deserve," I said. "That much of what Lt. Jee said is true. You love me, you hate me. You say you respect what I am and what I do, then when it's like the world is against you, you call me a fugitive, a traitor, and you blame me for my own mistakes."

"It is your fault," said Zuko. "Just like my own banishment was mine as well."

"Zuko, your father challenged a twelve-year-old boy when he was only speaking for the good of the nation," I said strenuously. "You spoke out against Fire Lord Ozai's plan, and you were right about it. You were right about everything."

"That doesn't matter because I disrespected him," said Zuko. "And it's not right that you tried to rob my father."

"I did it to help my family through poverty—"

"You stole from my father, so you stole from me," said Zuko angrily.

I found myself approaching him, and my fears went out the window.

"You don't know anything," I said, feeling tears fall from my eyes and down to my cheeks, "about me, Zuko! You don't know what your father has done! You don't know that he's a cruel monster because he doesn't know you! You are caught between good and bad, and you don't realize that you're fighting on the wrong side!"

"Stop crying," Zuko said, and his voice dropped an octave as he stared at me, surprised. "You're telling me things that I don't want to hear. My father will take me back, and he'll restore my honor once I catch the Avatar."

I shook my head sadly.

"You are a brilliant prince, Zuko," I said, wiping tears from my eyes, "but you can sometimes be a stupid boy."

I jerked the door open and slammed it on my way out.

When I was in my quarters, and I had poured my heart out onto a tear-stained pillow, I heard my door open slowly, and it closed on someone's way in. I was lying on my side, gazing at the wall. A shift of weight on my mattress pulled me slightly. And in the middle of the silent atmosphere, the calm voice of Prince Zuko asked me in the dim lit room,

"I'm…sorry."

"You don't have to be sorry." I said. My voice cracked, and I scorned myself for showing vulnerability. "I understand what's going on with you. I understand that the only way for your life to return to normality is capturing the Avatar…"

"I'm not sorry about what I said," he said clearly.

I turned to look at him.

"How is that supposed to make me feel better?" I asked dryly.

"I guess it's not." Zuko muttered. "I suppose Uncle Iroh told you what happened to me so that you would understand what's happening. I guess I haven't been really the best…boyfriend…to you. I think the reason why we fight is because I don't know exactly how we end up fighting."

"That doesn't make any sense," I mumbled. I turned to look back at the wall; he grabbed my arm to turn me back.

"No, it kind of does. I don't know why we fight because I don't know why you argue with me." A pause. "That came out wrong too. I guess I'm not used to apologizing."

"Mess up a few more times," I said lightly. "You'll get the hang of it."

"Well, I just want to know what happened exactly." Zuko said calmly. "With you and all that stuff that happened that day. I've really only heard stories…"

I sat up.

"Fine." I said with a shrug.

So I told him about how my father was a bender and my mother was not. I told him about my dad was a cargo trader on a vessel who sailed from several parts of the world. I told him about how my mother was simply a humble house wife. I told him about my friendship with Azula, which was a good one for the most part. I told him about my friendships with Ty Lee and Mai, which were also good. I told him about my first instincts about the Fire Nation, about how I thought we were fighting a lost cause: not because we were a failing country, but because the other nations didn't seem to like us. I told him about how my powers were well-liked by my parents, and how Azula liked them too.

Then I told him about how Fire Lord Ozai learned about my special powers, and he told my father that if I was this so-called powerful 'witch', I could throw Azula off a flight of stairs. If I could do it, my powers would be realized, and my family would be an important, wholly respected family like Mai's. If I didn't do what the Fire Lord wanted, my refusal would be penalized, and my father would spent his life in jail for false reports.

I told Prince Zuko how I couldn't even use my powers if I really wanted to because I thought my friendship with Azula was blossoming and everlasting; and how, afterwards, Azula Firebended at me and burned my arms and legs. I told him that I saw the Fire Nations soldiers take away my father, and that I was told that he would come back at a more convenient time. That's when Zuko took me on a tour of his home.

I told Prince Zuko that when he led me pass the treasury, I took things that weren't considered family heirlooms—gold coins, simple jewelry items—and ran as fast I could back home before I could be noticed. Azula had told Fire Lord Ozai what I done and only a few minutes later did the soldiers come to my house. I had given my mom the gold and ran for it, heading off to the docks. Before I left, the soldiers confiscated the gold, and my mother—with no source of income—would live out her life with no husband, childless, and in poverty.

And I told Prince Zuko that I had journeyed to the Earth Kingdom, but apparently, my powers were considered to be evil in Ba Sing Se, and I was chased out of the city by refugees and Earthbenders. I told him that I had to swim miles, miles, and miles away. I had passed out, and floated to shore. That's when I discovered that I had arrived on the outskirts of an air temple. And then my story became updated when Zuko's fleet had come.

And the reason why I had attacked them, I had said, was because I thought Fire Lord Ozai had sent his son and brother after me.

After I told Prince Zuko all of this, he and I sat in silence that seemed to last for several minutes.

"So," he said summarily, "You really hate my father, don't you?"

I nodded wordlessly.

"Why didn't you ever tell me?"

"I did." I retorted. "But you still thought that I stole from you father out of spite. I loved my home, Zuko. I loved your home. And the Fire Nation would be a grand nation if they just didn't…"

"Didn't what?" insisted Zuko, for my voice trailed off.

"If they didn't…hate so much…" I said in a low voice.

"What do you mean?"

"Zuko," I said gently, "surely you must see that the world doesn't want expansion. Water Tribes want Waterbenders; the Earth Kingdom wants Earthbenders."

"But they need expansion; they have to open their eyes," said Zuko. "They need to know that there is more out there than just fancy splashes. If they knew that, the Earth Kingdom wouldn't have attacked you. Don't you think that they need to be put in their place?"

"They would have attacked me anyway," I said softly. "If you haven't seen me yet, you know that I don't actually fit the 'Fire Nation look'. I mean, really, Zuko, have you ever seen anybody with blonde hair? Ever?"

He looked at my hair momentarily.

"Well, no, but I don't see why that should change how people treat you."

"You wouldn't think it would matter." I muttered, "But it does."

Just as I finished speaking, the entire ship jolted in the middle of the ocean; Zuko and I fell forward slightly.

It looked like the storm had reached full impact.

Zuko and I looked at each other knowingly, and we flung away our story telling for a better time. We scampered up the stairs to the main deck, where we were greeted by angry claps of thunder, hard rain, tossing waves, and a sky full of furious, gray clouds. Lightning zapped across the sky.

Lt. Jee and his crew members, along with General Iroh, Zuko, and I struggled to stay upright as the ship battled the waves. Another zap of lightning fell from the sky, and it targeted the helm with ultimate force.

"Where were we hit?" cried Zuko.

"I don't know!" Lt. Jee replied.

"Look!" Iroh called in the middle of the giant fuss.

Up to the bridge tower, the crewman hung off some of the rigging that had been torn away from the bolt of lightning.

"The helmsman!" Zuko called out in alarm.

Zuko climbed up the external ladder up to the bridge area; Lt. Jee followed close behind him. Iroh grabbed my hand and pulled me behind his back to shield me from something that I wasn't anticipating—a lightning strike flared toward us; Iroh connected the bolt to his fingertips, and was bent through his body, away from me and away from the men trying to rescue the helmsman; it shot out of Iroh's other hand and struck the open water. I looked back Iroh.

"General," I said, smiling in the pouring rain, "you cease to amaze me!"

He coughed smoke and grinned.

The helmsman cried out in alarm, and his hand slipped from the rigging; he fell only for a moment; Zuko grabbed him out of the air and pulled him back to the ladder. Lt. Jee took hold of the crewman, and smiled appreciatively at Zuko, who wordlessly returned a small smile.

Another thrash of lightning scoured the bridge toward up in the rigging, and it zapped the better part of it, slashing the entire establishment. Zuko and the Lieutenant cried out in fear.

However, I wasn't too tired to do my share of the rescuing. The loose tower fell only for a few seconds; and it halted right before it landed on my officers. Although it hurt like a bleeding porcupine, I managed to levitate the entire rig and place it back on its upright position. Lt. Jee walked up to me and shook my hand frivolously.

"I am so glad Prince Zuko added you to the team," he said with a wide grin.

As he said it, a flying bison flew overhead.

"The Avatar!" Zuko cried out in dismay.

Lt. Jee reported instantly to him,

"What do you want to do, sir?"

Zuko paused to consider his options, and ultimately he said,

"Let him go. We need to get this ship to safety."

Iroh sighed with relief.

"Then," he said, "We must head directly into the eye of the storm."

"Oh," I breathed tiredly, "that's sounds awesome."

The wind died down, and it merely drizzled. Zuko lowered his head as his uncle appeared behind him.

"Uncle," he said quietly. "I'm sorry…"

Iroh beamed and set a hand on his nephew's shoulder,

"Your apology is accepted."

I slugged his shoulder affectionately.

"There's not a boring moment with you." Then I added, "You idiot."

He smiled slightly.

Iroh looked at me for a moment.

"What?" I said curiously.

"Have you…Have you always been a blonde?"

Zuko and I exchanged a look of admiration for Iroh's randomness.

"Yes," I said, laughing slightly. "I have."