Chapter 19 – Pieces

The heart is the only broken instrument that works – T.E Kalem

"How is Harry fitting in?" Dumbledore asked. He'd arrived just after Sirius had transformed back into a man after apparently 'talking' to Jethro. Remus had tried not to laugh at the strange sight of the small golden puppy staring fearfully at the large, shaggy black dog. He had no idea how the two of them had communicated but the puppy had been oddly well behaved since. He'd run off to distract Harry, leaving Remus and Sirius with the headmaster.

"Well, sometimes. He's scared of just about everything, and I'm not sure how to help him. I wonder what the hell those Dursleys did to him" Sirius replied coldly, barely managing to contain his anger. Remus shook his head in exasperation, he knew that Sirius was angry, but it wasn't exactly the old man's fault. He had seemed genuinely surprised by how the Dursleys had been treating him.

"Being angry at me won't help Harry" Dumbledore replied calmly.

"He wouldn't need help if you'd given him to someone who actually cared for him"

Remus face palmed himself. Throwing accusations at Dumbledore would get them nowhere. "Arguing about what happened in the past will get us nowhere. What's done is done, and nothing you can say is going to change that"

"I couldn't have said it better myself Remus. The only thing that you can do now is help Harry. Try to make him happy"

"What would you suggest?" Sirius asked sarcastically, obviously still angry at the old professor.

"You seem to be doing a perfectly adequate job. He looked awfully happy when I saw him walk out into the garden"

Remus and Sirius shared a look. "That wasn't anything we did, that was because of Jethro"

"The dog? I think you'll find that you're already doing what you're meant to. The most important thing is for him to feel safe, cared for and loved"

Remus rolled his eyes. The old man was still bleating on about how love was the most important magic in the world. It hadn't done James and Lily much good, had it? Thinking of them brought the old pain back again. It was like the ache of an old injury, he didn't think it would ever fully heal.

"Everybody keeps saying that, but nobody says how" Sirius exclaimed, sounding like he was on the edge of a breakdown. Remus guessed that the stresses of Azkaban and freedom were finally catching up with him, not to mention the strain of suddenly having to care for a four year old boy, regardless of how sweet said little boy was. Remus couldn't blame him for that; both of their lives had changed so much over the past two weeks. Hell, two weeks ago Remus had been crying himself to sleep nearly every night.

"Sirius, you're already doing it. You just need to be patient and keep reassuring him. I know it's hard, but he probably needs to be reminded"

Sirius rolled his eyes and sighed. Apparently, Sirius didn't think that that was good enough. Remus couldn't argue with that, Sirius was the one who grew up in an abusive home. He probably had some idea already of what he thought that Harry needed, and obviously it wasn't just what everybody else had suggested.

An awkward silence fell between the three men. Remus knew that it was up to him to carry on the conversation. A shriek and a loud peal of laughter interrupted Remus' attempt of conversation. A broad grin spread over Sirius' face and Remus couldn't help but smile at Harry's contagious laugh.

"I don't know why you're so worried, Harry sounds utterly thrilled" Dumbledore assured the two men in front of him, before rising to his feet, "I just came to check how you were coping with Harry, and freedom. I must return to Hogwarts before I am missed. Farewell"

Remus nodded and waved at the headmaster, before walking out of the house to find Harry and Jethro. Harry was playing tug of war with the small puppy, a broad grin on his face. Remus stopped; quite content to lean against the wall and watch them play.

"He looks…happy" Sirius' voice broke into Remus' consciousness. Remus turned to look at Sirius and saw a far away look on his face.

"You know that's because of you, right? It was your idea Sirius" Remus didn't even stop to think about the fact that he had to reassure Sirius about the one thing that he'd been sure about. He had expected that he'd need to help Sirius when he'd got out of Azkaban, to help him regain his feet in the wizarding world. He'd figured that Sirius would need him; Remus knew that Azkaban was meant to be hell on earth.

Harry's cheerful voice interrupted Remus' depressing thoughts. "Are you OK? You both look really sad"

"Just thinking Harry. How are you getting on with Jethro?"

Harry grinned shyly, "I love him. He's brilliant"

Remus grinned as Sirius moved forwards, tickling Harry's sides relentlessly. Harry shrieked with laughter and tried to squirm away from Sirius, his eyes twinkling with mirth. The likeness between Harry and James had never hit him so forcefully before, but now it was all that he could see. The number of times that Remus had seen a similar look of joy on James' face made his heart ache. He didn't think he'd ever truly be able to deal with James' death. He and Sirius had been the first people (aside from his parents) to accept him for what he was, and the pain of losing that would linger with him forever. It was like his heart had shattered into a million pieces on the day that he'd heard what happened, and no matter what he did, he didn't think he'd be able to put the pieces back together.

Remus excused himself, muttering some excuse about getting a jumper and raced inside. He had been a wreck before the truth had come out, and he was a fool if he'd thought that that would go away as soon as Sirius returned and they'd taken Harry.

Remus felt overwhelmed by it all. In just two days he'd gone from a grief worn shell of a man, to a man forced to care for his one remaining friend and the last remnant of his other true friends. He hadn't even had time to absorb what was happening. He'd just done it blindly, fighting to try and regain that which he once had. But it wasn't the same. It would never be the same again; James and Lily were gone and no matter how much Harry looked like his father, it wasn't the same. He didn't think that he was the same man either. He carried far too much grief, exhaustion and guilt to be the same cheerful man that he had been.

But he wasn't alone anymore, Sirius and Harry were still here; and they were the most important people in the world to him. As hard as it might be to move on, Harry and Sirius were the last things he had left. He would do just about anything for them. Including making them come out of the December air, to stop them getting a cold. But first, he had to make something.

"Harry, Sirius, Hot Chocolate?" Remus called, trying not to laugh at the two of them playing with Jethro. Harry raced into the kitchen, making sure to wipe his shoes on the doormat. Sirius and Jethro followed at a more stately pace. "If you sit down Harry, I'll hand you the cup"

Remus handed Harry and Sirius a cup of hot chocolate and shifted Jethro's bed. The puppy ignored it and laid down next to Harry's chair. They couldn't have found a more loyal dog for Harry if they'd tried.

OoOoOo

Remus was sat in his usual armchair after saying good night to Harry, deep in thought. He couldn't shake the grief that had been occupying his mind all day. He'd spent three years trying to deal with James and Lily's deaths, and though it had gotten easier, the pain had never eased. He'd hoped that having Sirius back would make the pain easier, but it had only made it harder.

"Remus, stop thinking about them" Remus jumped, he hadn't noticed Sirius' appearance. The raven-haired man walked over, practically throwing himself on to the sofa in front of him.

"Thinking about who?" Remus asked, trying to cover up his own mistake. He knew it was a bad idea to bring up James and Lily in front of Sirius. He didn't think the poor man had recovered from their deaths.

"James and Lily. Don't try to deny it Remus, it was pretty obvious from your facial expression that you were thinking about them" Sirius replied softly, moving towards where Remus was sat.

Remus sighed. "I was just thinking about how hard it was…when I was alone"

"You're not alone anymore Remus. We're mourning the same people"

"I know, I just…it was hard Sirius, everything I had was ripped away from me that night. I lost everything! I know what you went through was worse, but…"

"It was hard, for both of us" Sirius muttered, drawing Remus to his feet and pulling him into a hug. Sirius had always been able to make people feel better, ever since school. Remus knew that Sirius was dealing with his own grief, but he still took the time to try and make Remus feel better. He was damn good to Remus, always had been and probably always would be. Remus smiled sadly. His heart had been broken into pieces for years, but Sirius was already helping him to pick the pieces back up.

AN: So I've made my choice about partners, and I really hope it won't annoy too many people. I'm not going to tell you what that choice is, and I'm not going to explain it either – yet.

Any who, I really hope you enjoyed this chapter, I had issues writing the end. Please leave a review x