On My Own Too Long

Reid and Prentiss

Chapter 14

September 2011

That night when they were back at the rental house they sat outside, in the moonlight, talking for hours about their dreams for their children's future.

Emily told Reid "So many nights I lay in bed right inside this house and thought about this...dreamt about this."

"I think all parents do that. Imagining all the different things our children could grow up to be is an act of hope. Its saying we believe they will be healthy, live long lives and get the chance to be whatever they want to be."

"I dreamed about the kid's future but I also thought about this..us...you and me being parents together...just seeing you again...sometimes I wondered if it would be years and if it was would you hate me for keeping the kids away from you. When I came back would I get my life back? Would it just be too late?"

"Hotch would never tell you its too late to come back to work. He knows how valuable your expertise is to the team."

"I meant... it would be too late for us."

"Oh." They stared deep into each other's eyes. "I would never tell you that its too late for us because I could never imagine not feeling this way about you."

"What way is that? Remember I'm the woman who needs to hear things aloud."

He cupped her face and leaned close. "Like I want to kiss you."

Their lips came together in a soft, gentle, caress- a kiss that searched for answers more than quenched their passions. There would be time for that later. For now they needed to explore the feelings that got put on hold when she went into Witness Protection.

Emily tangled her fingers in Reid's hair and pulled him a little closer. They shared small kisses for a few moments until they broke apart, their foreheads resting against each other.

He told hr "Emily, there hasn't been anyone else in my life since you came here. I need you to know that."

Tears came to her eyes. She was more emotional these days because she had just given birth. Moving back from him, she fought back her tears, and glanced away. "Just because we have babies together it doesn't mean we need to be together...date. I care about you but I don't think we should rush into an instant made family."

"We don't have any choice there. The kids are here already. The only choice is if you and me are going to retreat from this and deny its happening...deny its real...deny how we feel...or if we're going to keep exploring this. Or maybe you want to tell me you didn't feel anything when we kissed. Go ahead and say that, if you want, but I won't believe you."

She smirked and looked at him again. "Oh yeah? How can you be so sure that I felt something?" she teased him.

"I know you, that's how," he said, capturing her lips in a more heated kiss, as his hand cupped her cheek.

Moaning while they kissed Emily opened her mouth to Reid and grabbed his shirt with two hands when his tongue slid against hers. When they broke apart again she said "It just sucks that we couldn't explore this last winter, before I ever knew I was pregnant. Now we'll never know...what might have been."

"You're right. We'll never know what would have happened then but we can still find out what happens now. What's scaring you away from the idea?"

"What makes you think I'm scared? Its not that I'm scared. Its that I'm cautious now because I'm a Mom. That changes everything, Reid. It changes me and this and us."

"Can't it be two separate issues?"

"Of course not because we're their parents and if we hurt each other and cause a war zone then they get hurt." She groaned. "I don't think I can risk that. I know that sucks. It really does. But we're such good friends and things are really good now. Maybe they wouldn't be if we get together and it doesn't work."

Stroking his hand along her face, staring deep into her eyes, he asked "Do you know what I think would be best for our kids? Us together. If there is even the slightest chance we could make that work, I think we need to explore that, both for us and them. That's what good parents would do. The question isn't if dating would risk our kid's happiness...that's not it at all, as far as I see it...the only question is: how do you feel about me?"

Right before she caught his lips in a kiss she confessed "I'm certifiably crazy about you," and as they kissed more it was decided that they couldn't turn their backs on these feelings, even if it was more complicated now and there was a lot more at stake.

Everything that was simmering between them before hadn't faded away and there was no denying they both wanted to see what they could turn into if they let their feelings grow. Only time would tell for Spencer Reid and Emily Prentiss but so far they were truly blessed to have been placed on the same team at the BAU, to grow a friendship for five years and then grow a love that made two beautiful children.

Who knows how far they could go down this road together? Under the Iowa sky that night anything and everything seemed possible for them and their babies though...and it was love- growing by leaps and bounds every day- that made what used to be a lonely life for both of them now so full.

(This year's love had better last.

Heaven knows its high time.

I've been waiting on my own too long.) (David Gray)