Authors Note: As Promised, the next chapter! I know I told some of you not to hold me to it, but guess you could! This one is slightly shorter than the previous chapters, but still in the 2000 words category. c: I try to make them at least that. You guys are seriously amazing with your reviews. I love how a bunch of you ask questions ext and give your input, ext. I really do. You guys are just great. I love you all and I hope I continue to keep you guys interested in this story. -Holly
Disclaimer: It's in my letter to Santa!
Chapter Six
Jane waited a moment, running a hand through her wet hair. She just needed to breathe, gather her thoughts. God, she had never seen Maura so...broken looking. When she had walked in to find her friend cowering in the shower it took everything she had not to let the rage and sadness take over. Her emotions were all over the place. I could have protected her...I knew...I knew something wasn't right that day. I just knew something bad was gonna happen. I should have...I should have followed my gut and went down there to see her. Tears sprang into her eyes and she clenched her fists, fingernails digging into the scars on her palms. "Fuck!" She whispered harshly.
If she was at home she probably would have landed her fist in the bathroom mirror or the wall, somewhere. She needed to hit something...someone...Those fucking bastards. Jane's jaw clenched and she pinched the bridge of her nose and took a few deep calming breaths. Maura needed her right now, this was not the time to have a pity party. Sighing, Jane walked out of the bathroom and into Maura's room to find her sitting at the edge of the bed, clad in a pair of silk button down pajamas. She was staring off into space, shoulders hunched. Maura always had good posture and it was strange to see her like that.
"Maur," Jane said softly, watching as the honey blonde turned her head slowly to look at Jane. "Can I borrow some clothes?" She asked quietly, holding the towel tightly around her.
Maura looked over to her dresser before speaking. "You have some clothes you've left over here before. They're in the third drawer to the left." She pointed to the dresser and nodded in it's general direction.
Jane smiled and nodded. "Thanks." She said softly before she moved to the dresser and pulled open the drawer Maura had directed her to. Sure enough, there was one of Jane's ratty Celtics t-shirts and a pair of yoga pants. She pulled them out and moved to the bathroom to change.
"Will you bring me your sweatshirt while you're in there?" Maura called softly. She found that the oversized hoodie smelled like Jane and she rather liked that. There was a muffled "Yeah" from Jane in the bathroom before the woman emerged, holding the neatly folded BPD sweatshirt. "Thank you, Jane." Maura said softly as she took the hoodie and unfolded it.
Jane watched her for a moment, before deciding she should throw her clothes in the dryer and get their soup. "I'll be right back, gonna get our soup and stuff." She said before moving back into the bathroom to ring out her clothes in the shower and throw them in the dryer.
Nodding, Maura watched the detective disappear into her bathroom and a minute later come out carrying her wet clothes quickly down the hall. Sighing, Maura brought Jane's sweatshirt to her nose and inhaled deeply, burying her face in it and closing her eyes. Jane's scent seemed to bring her comfort. She had no idea how long she had been holding the sweatshirt to her face until she heard Jane's voice.
"What'er ya doin'?" Jane asked, brows furrowed and holding two bowls of soup. She wanted to be amused at the action but kept the smile from her face.
Maura jumped slightly but recovered, setting the sweatshirt down and turning to look at Jane. "I've found that your sweatshirt smells like...you. I usually come to you when I am in distress and am in need of comfort, you are familiar, so my olfactory senses find your scent comforting and it reminds me of a time that I felt particularly calm and safe." She explained before bringing the sweatshirt back to her nose to inhale once more.
Jane stared at her a moment, a small smile on her face, touched by what Maura had said, before she slowly came and sat beside her friend. "Here's your soup." She proffered said soup, waiting for Maura to take it. When she did, Jane looked back down at her own soup and took a hold of the spoon before taking a sip. She tried to think of something to say before finally settling with, "So, what's Oval-whatevery senses?" Jane asked, casting a side glance at Maura.
A small smile formed on Maura's lips at Jane's mispronunciation. "Olfactory senses, Jane. It refers or relates to the sense of smell. It originates from the Latin word, 'Olfacturius'. It was estimated that the first known use was in 1658." Maura said factually, sounding like herself for the first time since Jane found her at the gas station.
Jane grinned, tears shining in her eyes, her heart feeling lighter as Maura cocked her head slightly and stared at Jane with that self satisfied little smile she did when spouting off facts. Upon noticing the tears that started to fall from Jane's eyes, though, Maura's smile turned into a frown. "Jane, are you okay?" She asked with concern.
It was then that Jane noticed the tears that were rolling down her cheeks. Damn them for falling without her permission! She held her bowl of soup in one hand and quickly swiped the tears away with the other. "Yeah...I just-" Her voice was huskier than usual, thick with emotion as she took a breath and swallowed the tears. "God, Maur...I was so...worried; so scared..." The last part came out in almost a whisper, but Maura had still heard her. There were only a few times that Jane had ever admitted to being scared. "I have no right to be crying or saying this, because you - I - I - Just- I thought I'd never see you again, Maura." Jane couldn't get out what she wanted to say, couldn't describe what she was feeling in words and she felt that she had no right to feel this, or at least no right to be crying to Maura about it...Not after everything she had been through. Jane needed to be strong for her.
Maura, for her part got up, taking both their bowls and setting them on the side table before returning to her seat at the end of the bed, next to Jane. She took a breath and gently grabbed Jane's hand. "You're human, Jane. Of course you have a right to feel what you're feeling. I'm your best friend, and I..." She bit her lip and took another calming breath. "You were worried about me...I-I was scared I'd never see you again too." She looked down, cursing the familiar sting of tears. She wondered if she'd ever fully remember what happened. She wasn't sure if it was a blessing or a curse. It would be nice to know why she felt so much fear and hurt, so much emotion she couldn't explain. One thing she did remember, was how she did in fact think she'd never see Jane again; A thought she hated to think about.
Jane squeezed her friend's hand and scooted closer. "I never thought I'd hear your google mouth again." she said, wrapping a free arm gently around Maura and smiling a little at her comment. She had missed google mouth Maura. "We should finish eating, and you need to rest." Jane said, knowing that Maura was exhausted by the way the ME leaned into her.
Maura sighed softly, taking her free hand to wipe away a few stray tears before nodding. "Okay...But you'll sleep in here, right?" She asked, her voice suddenly filled with fear, smaller than before as she lifted her head to look up at the detective. At Jane's nod, Maura let out a small breath she didn't know she'd been holding. "Thank you. And Jane...," She hesitated before continuing. "I-I know you need a statement, b-but we - can we do that tomorrow?" She stammered, visibly swallowing.
"Yeah, of course Maur. Don't worry about that right now." Jane said softly as she got up to retrieve their bowls so they could finish eating. Logically, it would have been better for Maura to make a statement now, while it was still fresh, but Jane couldn't bare to do that to Maura; wasn't sure if she could handle it herself right now.
Dinner was consumed in a companionable silence, each soaking up the others' presence. Jane finished first. She held out her hand for Maura's bowl, offering a small smile when Maura looked up and gently placed the bowl in her hands. "Why don't you get ready for bed, and I'll be right back." Jane said softly as she turned and took the dirty dishes into the kitchen.
Maura sighed and went to the bathroom to brush her teeth, she had a feeling that nightmares were ahead, or worse...She'd wake up and be back in that dark room again, away from Jane. Maura shook her head to dispel her irrational thoughts before rinsing her mouth and walking back into her bedroom. Jane was pulling back the covers before she collapsed on 'her' side of the bed. She watched as the dark haired brunette patted the spot beside her and gave Maura a reassuring smile. Slowly, Maura crawled into bed and scooted closer than was necessary, closer than they normally slept. Jane however didn't seem to mind.
The detective turned on her side, facing Maura and wrapped her arms around her. Maura tensed at first, but as she inched closer and buried her face in Jane's neck, her body relaxed. Jane's unique scent filled her nose and her eyes fluttered closed. "Sleep, Maur. No ones gonna hurt you. I'll keep you safe." Jane whispered, though the last part was more so to herself than to Maura.
Maura gripped the fabric of Jane's shirt, snuggling closer as she took shelter in the comfort that Jane was offering. She smiled a little at her thoughts. Jane was warm, her skin was soft and she smelled familiar, sweet but not too sweet. She felt safe, Jane felt safe, she would keep Maura Safe. I'm safe, She'll keep me safe...That was the last coherent thought Maura had before exhaustion took over and she fell into the open arms of sleep.
Jane took comfort in the heavenly sound of Maura's evened out breathing. She was here, Maura was here. She was safe in Jane's arms. But Maura had been through so much...Jane's arms subconsciously tightened around Maura as she gently pulled her closer. She had this overwhelming need to protect Maura, but look at how well that turned out before?
Sighing, Jane nuzzled her face in Maura's still damp hair and closed her eyes. She'd keep Maura safe, be there for her always. She had to make up for letting this happen. If only she had listened to that uneasy feeling she had felt after their lunch break. If only she had gone down to the Morgue a little earlier, she could have stopped it all from happening. She'd find whoever did this, make them suffer. Jane let out a shuddery breath, her heart aching as she thought about how she could have lost Maura, lost her best friend.
Jane forced back tears and stared up at the ceiling, willing the horrible thoughts and scenarios that seemed to plague her mind, back to wherever they came from. She closed her eyes and listened to Maura's steady breathing, traced her fingers over the honey blonde's back, reveling in the constant reminder that Maura was really here.
It took some time, but eventually Jane calmed down enough to fall asleep. It wasn't a deep sleep, though. Her mind wouldn't allow that, she didn't deserve a good night's sleep. It didn't matter anyway, she needed to be able to wake up quickly if Maura needed her. Jane promised she'd be there, and she would. She'd be there for Maura.
Meanwhile, the seemingly peaceful sleep that had welcomed Maura soon turned into the nightmares that she had anticipated, that Jane had anticipated.