Chapter 45, everyone! Got this chapter and the next and then we're in spotty territory again…I'm working on it, I swear, I'm just trying to figure this out ("shake things up" I tell myself. "Shake up the order of the episodes," I tell myself. Well Self, you ended up making a huge mess of it all, congratulations! *bricked*).

The sideshow attractions are somewhat based on the ones I walked by a lot at the fair and the ones covered in shows like American Pickers and Mysteries at the Museum—people did some really questionable things back in the day. D:

Davidtheumbreon, thanks for the review! It was! Surprised me too when he did it….

AverageHiveMind, thanks for the review! Yes, Bon Appetit! :D And improving humor yes—it's called recycling, it's better for the environment. *bricked* Honestly not sure—I run into lines I like and I just file them away in my mind as "this is funny." You're actually going to get more of Patches really soon! :D Yes…we're pretty far in, but still a long way from the end—I don't have everything written up yet, but after this chapter I've got roughly 250 pages written up (I'm actually going to have to break the document in half soon). Plenty of writing space (just not in the next handful of chapters…). :D Maybe….And you've got me, I'm truly a fedora-wearing Squirtle. I like that idea, deal—DUCK! (I've seen your stuff, I need to catch up on commenting just take a day and come up with something that's not asghdfshfdvee). XD

FaolenBookWolf, thanks for the review! Yes, it's impressive. And thank you! :D

Talesfanjmf, thanks for the review! Glad your whim brought you to this story, and that you liked it. :D I swear, we ought to make a Frenzy Fan Club, I feel like it'd have a lot of members. XD And glad you liked the split—I liked it when I saw it in another fic, so I'm glad I'm not the only one. :D And…honestly, Squirtle's episode was one I missed almost every single time I ever tried to watch the show, so that might be why. :\ Glad you've been liking things so far, and I hope to continue to please! :D

JackO'Lantern-Summers, thanks for the review! Surprising, isn't it?

WinterAlice, thanks for the review! Glad to get a laugh out of you! :D

Thanks for the review, Gusto! Glad you're enjoying Darkrai—I know I am. :D

Thanks for the review, Sparky! Yes—and yes, but as you said, the chances of Ash swapping out his badge box is very low. Hmmm….Perhaps! Or Growlie just didn't want to leave him. Either way. And don't fret friend! So long as you enjoy what you read! :D

Pokémon © Game Freak; Nintendo

And now, for something completely different:

What's worse than finding an Applin in your apple? Finding half an Applin.

The next event worth noting after the incident with Team Rocket was when the route finally wound out of the woods and into a small town.

Specifically, a small town with a fair rolled in.

It didn't take them long to be accosted by various noises and hawkers calling for them to view their exhibits—wonders from Hoenn, jewels from Johto, spectacular sights from Sinnoh, the eighth wonder of the world, an amazing spectacle straight from Almia—the usual.

Brock was honestly quite used to wandering through sideshows like this—his first experience with them had been his own father taking him to one and touring all the different exhibitions. Brock remembered constantly wavering between calling Tauros on them and being completely horrified at them.

Later on, Brock's siblings had insisted on going and seeing the sideshows, and he had had a minor panic attack at trying to figure out how to keep them from some of the more horrific exhibits. He had finally settled on telling them that he'd go in first to make sure they weren't seeing anything hokey or fake, because who wanted to waste their quarters on that when they could spend them on rides or games or food? It had been a good system, and his siblings had seen maybe ten percent out of all the exhibits.

Mostly because sideshow exhibits tended to fall into one of two categories: hokey or horrific. Memorable ones to him were the Pikachu-man, which was basically a man dressed up as a Pikachu, and the human Flygon—again, a person dressed up. That was hokey.

Horrific extended to corpses, Pichu with docked ears to sell them as the world's smallest Pikachu, Pikachu dyed blue and sold as 'Pikablu,' and assorted other Pokémon with tails or other appendages cut off to sell them as new or strange or unusual Pokémon. It was enough to make Brock wish he had brain bleach, and wasn't something he wanted his siblings to see.

So when Ash asked about the sideshows, Brock had been quick to suggest his method of checking the exhibits out first. "So we don't waste a lot of money on anything hokey or fake."

Ash nodded. "Okay, that makes sense."

"It does," Misty agreed.

Hence why Brock was currently peering very closely at a Raichu billed as having the longest recorded tail out of the species—he couldn't get a good angle to see if the tail had been docked or if it was tucked away out of sight, but the long black line coiling around the Raichu sitting passively there was most definitely just cable. Brock was shaking his head when he came back out.

A few moments of looking located Ash, at least—standing and looking at a banner that Brock recognized.

"Well?" Ash asked after Brock tapped him on the shoulder, glancing up at him.

"Hokey," Brock confirmed, before pointing at the banner. "But I've seen this one before, so I know it's not—where's Misty?"

"She said she was going to go get something to eat while you were looking."

"I'm surprised you didn't go with her."

"Yeah, but there was supposed to be some sort of show soon and I said I'd save a seat when it opened," Ash said, glancing at a tent down the line.

Brock hummed pensively. "Well, I'm not sure about her being alone in all this…."

"Pikachu's with her."

"That does make a difference," Brock said, nodding. "Okay, we have enough time to see this one."

"You promise it's not hokey," Ash said as they paid their quarters.

"Promise it's not—and don't make any loud noises or tap on the glass."

The reason for this counsel was because the banner Ash had been staring at had read World's Largest Seviper—the Magnificent Maudlin! And in Brock's experience, she had been huge every time he had seen her, and had probably not ceased to keep growing in the interim.

The Seviper itself had reportedly come from the deeper jungles of Hoenn, and was kept warm, well-fed, and well-trained. When Brock had seen it last, it had been pushing twelve feet. Now it was being advertised as sixteen, and he could certainly believe it—a body as thick as a tree trunk and as supple as a rope lay looped along a huge log, scales glittering in the warm lighting as it breathed. As per the usual with snake Pokémon, the Seviper had no eyelids, so it was impossible to be certain, but Brock thought it was sleeping—the second-to-last time he had been here, it had been awake and trying to find a more comfortable spot. It had been hypnotizing, watching its coils roll across each other, fangs and sharp blade-tail making a sharper scraping noise in contrast to the surrushing of its scales.

Ash, like most of the younger kids, was as close to the glass as the rope would allow, completely mesmerized.

"That's huge," Ash breathed, not taking his eyes off of the head as he fished out his Pokédex.

"No cameras, kid," the woman Brock knew was its trainer said, sitting on a stool with arms crossed.

"I just wanted to see if this had any information on it—no," Ash muttered, glancing down at the device with hope before having it crumple into disappointment. "Darn thing."

"Seviper are from Hoenn, and your 'dex only has information on Kantoan Pokémon," Brock reminded him quietly.

"I keep hoping," Ash said, putting his Pokédex back.

"Don't worry, I can tell you all about her," the woman said in a tone that carried easily through the narrow room, standing up and gesturing to the glass cage. "Maudlin here has been with us for about ten years now—we're not sure how old she is truly, but when she slithers over here again you can see some wicked scars from where Zangoose have tried for her."

It was a practiced pitch, and one that Brock heard before—whenever someone asked about the Seviper. And because it was practiced, the Seviper took the cue and slithered along the side of the glass, revealing not just a plethora of scars—now thin from where muscle and scales and sheer size had filled it in—but just how long and wide it was.

"Seviper are known for having a natural enemy in Zangoose," the woman continued, as the Seviper coiled up again, this time with its head next to her on the other side of the glass—a head that easily matched most of the woman's torso. "Considering she was a good eight feet long when I first met her, she had been holding her own quite well out there in the wilderness." She glanced up at a clock right behind them, which Brock knew counted out the full minute they were supposed to be in here. "Ah me, but we're out of time—move along then, let others get a chance."

Ash took one last look at the huge Seviper before letting Brock herd him out.

"That was so cool," Ash breathed, once they were out in the sun again.

"Told you it wasn't hokey," Brock said, looking around. "I don't see Misty."

"Maybe getting food is taking longer—we weren't in there that long, were we?"

"Only a minute," Brock said, scowling a little. "Come on—I'll get you to that thing and then I'll go look for Misty."

"I can take care of myself," Ash said, a little miffed.

"And I'm used to taking care of a bunch of kids, all of which have insisted at least once that they all come to the fair. Humor me."

Ash mumbled a little but did so.

"I could come with you though," he offered once they were in. "It doesn't look like there's a whole lot of demand for seats."

"You don't know that—the seats might become high demand closer to show time."

"I doubt that," an usher sniffed. "Now take your seats, the show is about to start."

"Yeah but I—"

"Now."

"Nice guy," Ash observed as they took a seat.

"Might be why there's no one here," Brock said, glancing back at the entranceway. The usher was busy tugging curtains closed. "Well…maybe we'll be able to sneak out if it turns out to be hokey."

"Yeah," Ash agreed. "There's only so much I'll sit through."

"Baseball games, for example."

"Yeah pretty much—and then only for five minutes or so."

Brock nodded, pointed at the stage, where a man in a magician's outfit had come out.

Within five minutes, they were in agreement.

"Hokey," Ash declared.

"Hokey," Brock agreed.

The magician—if one were being generous and calling him that—had a bland face and a nasally voice, and most likely wouldn't have talent if he were handed it. Thus far he had juggled Exeggcute and was currently botching up a trick where a girl was to swap places with a Pokémon—hey, wait a minute….

"Isn't that," Ash muttered, leaning on the seat in front of him as he peered closer.

"Misty!" Brock exclaimed.

"Pikachu!"

Pikachu's ears immediately shot up as he spun around—the little electric mouse quickly ditched the little cape he had been wearing, launched off the stage, and ran up the aisle to launch himself into Ash's arms.

"Good gravy, Pikachu! What were you doing?" Ash asked, hugging Pikachu close.

"Chaaa," Pikachu noised, burrowing in closer.

"I could ask the same question," Brock said, coming up to the stage to hiss at Misty. "What are you doing up there?"

"I don't know!" Misty hissed back, flushing red and tugging the Goldeen skirt further down. "We were waiting in line and then this guy asks about some help in a magic show and then the next thing I know I'm up here!"

"Excuse me," the magician said. "But you're ruining the show!"

"Nah, man," one of the scarce smattering of audience members said. "It was ruined before they got here."

"This is actually the most interesting thing that's happened so far," a guy munching on popped-Cornn said.

Brock felt his mouth twist at that, would have almost felt sorry for the magician if he hadn't chosen that moment to go "W-well I'll show you! Magic Fireball!" Under normal circumstances, Brock would have guessed that it would have been a rather impressive little fireball.

In this case, it ended up being a raging inferno that narrowly missed the audience. And then another one, when the magician was apparently so giddy about it working that he did it over and over again.

"We need a water Pokémon!" Brock yelped, ducking down. "The tent's going to catch on fire at this rate!"

Misty automatically reached for her belt, her suspenders, looked down at her outfit before glancing around frantically. "Where's all my stuff!?"

Pikachu lifted his nose into the air, sniffed—dashed around Misty before heading backstage, chittering loudly. Misty ran after him, nearly crawling to avoid the fire—

"Don't worry, we've still got at least one," Ash said, pulling one of his own Pokéballs out. "Go, Lenny!"

Lenny appeared with a challenging roar until he realized that he hadn't been called out into a battle—and then ducked a torrent of flame the startled magician shot at him.

"Lenny! Use Water Gun!" Ash yelled, ducking. "Stop the flames before they catch the tent on fire!"

Lenny roared his understanding, started blasting away at the smoking tent and making things somewhat worse, in Brock's opinion—at the very least, Lenny's Water Gun was strong enough that it was punching huge holes in the fabric.

"Not right now, but the next time we're in an unpopulated area I think you should try Hydro Pump with Lenny," Brock said to Ash.

"You really think so?" Ash asked, concern over the fire and potential property damage evaporating in the face of teaching Lenny a more powerful move.

Lenny, meanwhile, had felt that he had done enough to the tent itself and decided to turn his water on the magician—the man was thoroughly soaked when the Gyarados was done with him, and probably would have been blasted into the next county had his Exeggcute not stopped Lenny, freezing him with some variation of a psychic attack.

"Hey," Ash protested.

"It's over, Ash, let it go," Brock said.

"Finally found—what happened," Misty said flatly, coming back out with her usual clothes and backpack bundled up in her arms and a Pokéball in her free hand.

"The fire's out," Ash said, pointing.

"So's most of the tent."

"Was that really necessary?" the magician demanded—indignant heat did nothing for his voice. "Everything was going fine until you decided to interfere!"

"You set the tent on fire," Ash pointed out.

"And I'd like to know what you were doing with Misty," Brock said, helping her down. "Are you all right?" he asked her.

"I'm fine now—just really confused," she said. "I'm not entirely sure how I got from waiting in line for funnel cake to being an assistant in a magic act. Or the reasoning behind these clothes," she added, looking down at herself.

"I might have some idea—you were hypnotized."

"What?" Misty asked flatly. "How is that even possible?"

In response, Brock pointed at the Exeggcute.

"Psychic Pokémon tend to have that ability," Brock said. "It wouldn't surprise me to learn that this Exeggcute could pull it off."

"Hey," the magician whined, stepping between his Exeggcute and Brock. "Don't attack my Pokémon like that!"

"I'm not attacking them, I'm just saying what's most likely. For example: it's most likely that they were ordered to do so."

"Excuse me! All I did was ask if she wanted to be in my show."

"I remember getting ready to say no," Misty said, fidgeting. "I wasn't sure why I changed my mind…."

"I swear I didn't give that order!"

Brock considered this. "Then I suppose there's a chance your Exeggcute decided to make that decision for you—which isn't an improvement. Something like this, we could report you to the League for it."

"You wouldn't!"

"We would, but right now, I think we have other places to be. Misty, Ash. Ash?"

Ash had gone still, as had Pikachu and Lenny.

All three of them were facing the Exeggcute.

"Right," Brock said flatly. "I think that proves my point. Misty, need a Water type."

Misty readied her Pokéball—

The magician threw a smoke ball down—

When the smoke cleared, he, Ash, and the Pokémon were gone.