Hello everyone, it saddens me to inform you that due to events beyond our control, we had to discontinue this story and—stop STOP PUT THE TORCHES AND PITCHFORKS AWAY THAT WAS AN APRIL FOOL'S JOKE! APRIL! FOOLS! D:
Okay now that I've got the close brush with death out of the way…welcome to chapter 47! Let's see what these honyacks are up to.
Also, what this honyack was up to, and why we had no updates in March: I spent that month writing articles for CBR! And getting paid for it! :D So if you'd like to see examples of my nonfiction work, yeet yourself over to CBR-dot-com and check it out—I've done some Pokémon articles (including one on Nuzlockes) among others, so enjoy the reading. :D
And now for something completely different in the review responses:
I'd like to thank shukkets, Zaralann, JackO'Lantern-Summers, Ardtornismyname, HuangShenLong, Guest, Jossetfine, XT3100, and JadeDragon100 for the reviews! :D And thank you to Selet and Garm88 for reminding me that Rock types are actually not immune to Poison, so I'm going to just kind of handwave it as being that was the best Pokémon available for the job. ^^;
AverageHiveMind, thanks for the review! Yes! That's okay, I made up for it by not posting in March. *bricked* Yesss they're all fun to write and for once Ash wasn't entirely to blame! We're working on it! D: And ooh, sounds cool!
Dragonkeeper10, thanks for the review! Pretty sure you're right….
ChangelingRin, thanks for the review! Aha, I kind of think that if I ever held a character popularity poll Frenzy would win easily. :D Well, there's two reasons: realistic reason, Patches knew what to look for and assumed he was in a battle, so he folded his ears back and closed his eyes; hypnotism relies on visual and audial cues to trick the mind. In-game reason: Hypnosis puts the opponent to sleep, and Patches was asleep when he was sent out. ;D And thanks! Hopefully I can get back to the swing of things….
Talesfanjmf, thanks for the review! Ah, I can't take all the credit—I did rewatch the episode shortly before writing it, and apparently the forest was supposed to have a sign saying that there were leaf stones in there, but the dub cut it for some reason. *shrug*
Thanks for the review, Sparky! Hey, that's cool! :D And yes I did watch Mysteries at the Hotel/Monument/Museum, we love watching those shows. :D Probably end up trying to worm some more into the fic, it was fun putting that stuff in there (if disturbing at times).
Vulaan Kulaas, thanks for the review! Um…well…we did kind of leave him unconscious in a forest full of angry Exeggutor, so….Yes, that would be something if Darkrai met other Darkrai. :D
Appna, thanks for the review! Ah, thank you. *blushes*
Introverted Otaku, thanks for the review! Yes it is! :D
BOOM Fanfic-a-latta, thanks for the reviews! Glad you loved the chapters! :D
Lightreader1, thanks for the—unless I miss my count—lucky 777th review! :D Glad you're liking the story—this chapter might have some of what you're after. :D We might see….Pretty sure the Exeggutor are fine, just banged up.
RiRi14, thanks for the reviews! No, not discontinued—I wouldn't mind doing all the regions! And there probably won't be any romance; I've tried writing it before, it always seems to come out awkward and I'm not into it so…probably not. *shrug* As for the rest of your questions, we shall see….
Smallroo, thanks for the review! Thanks, I'm glad you like it! And yes, it was a reference to Welcome to Night Vale (kind of started that and now for something completely different thing to write in that style). Ah good, it's not just me.
Hun I might be, thanks for the reviews! THE EGG'S FINE, DON'T WORRY! D:
Crystal Blue Butterfly, thanks for the reviews! Thank you, I'm glad you love the story to the point of all caps! :D
Pokémon © Game Freak; Nintendo
Portal © Valve (Meowth quotes Wheatley)
Chicken Run © 2000 Aardman Studios (Jessie quotes Babs)
Lilo and Stitch © Chris Sanders; Disney (James quotes Pleakley)
And now, for something completely different:
In other news, trainers are in uproar over the Pokémon Storage System reporting that all the Pokémon in storage are now Magikarp. Lanette from Hoenn is addressing this issue, more news when available.
Misty was still grumbling about Darkrai's usefulness the next day when they set off again, but even she was forced to admit that he had more uses.
Specifically, trying to get around the mess that was the fences on one stretch of route.
"Who builds these!?" Misty demanded.
"And why," Brock asked. "It's not like these would stop a Pokémon."
"Maybe we can climb over," Ash suggested.
"Or you can go up the ridge there," Darkrai suggested, pointing.
"And you didn't tell us this earlier why?" Misty asked.
"I decided this wasn't as funny as I had hoped."
Ash watched Misty chasing Darkrai again, looked at Brock. "How long does working it out take?"
"I'm going with a while," Brock sighed.
Their sniping didn't stop after a full day of travelling either, to the point that wild Pokémon were avoiding them—not because of the hyper-predator in their midst—but because these two would not. Shut. Up.
Brock finally reached the end of his rope around dinner.
"ALL RIGHT!" he bellowed, banging his spoon on the side of the pot. "YOU TWO WILL GET ALONG OR PRETEND TO OR SO HELP ME I WILL NEVER COOK FOR YOU EVER AGAIN!"
Silence.
"What about me?" Ash asked. "I didn't do anything."
Misty and Darkrai actually interrupted each other in their scoffing.
"Can we start with the fact that we were travelling with this thing for well over a month before you said anything?" Misty asked, after exchanging a blank glance with Darkrai.
"Can we start with the fact that you're still travelling with this thing?" Darkrai asked, gesturing with a claw at Misty. "I mean it's not like she contributes to the team."
"I give up," Brock sighed, gesturing for Geodude to grab the too-hot-for-Brock-to-handle pot and follow him away. Ash stayed a moment, watching Darkrai dodge the mallet Misty was swinging—decided to follow dinner instead.
"So do I still get dinner?" he asked, as Brock got Charmander to relight a fire.
"That depends," Brock said. "I'm under the impression you have some sway with Darkrai."
"Yeah, but not a whole lot," Ash said. "It's like trying to get an adult to do what you want—it takes a lot of convincing, and usually it's not worth the hassle."
"We are all travelling together though, and since you still have four badges to go I'm operating under the impression that we're going to be travelling together for a while."
"Pika," Pikachu noised, still looking a little down.
"Bulba saur," Bulbasaur said, sitting nearby.
"Okay," Ash said, hands on his hips. "I'll talk to Darkrai—but you have to talk to Misty. I'm not going there."
"Fair enough."
Brock took Misty aside the next morning.
"I know you two get along like oil and water, but for the sake of everyone's sanity, please try not to let him get under your skin," he told her.
Misty gave him one of those I can't believe that level of stupid came out of your mouth looks. "You are joking, right? I mean, you heard him too."
"I did. But remember, there was this conversation we had, about water off a Psyduck's back? Recall that conversation for like a hot minute."
Misty huffed, crossed her arms and looked away—
Sighed and sagged.
"I try, okay?" she asked. "But it's like—I used up my…my entire reserve of tongue-holding energy with my sisters. I don't have any left to use on anyone else."
On the one hand, that made sense—on the other, Misty was most definitely still in her teens, and having her give-a-darn busted this early was more than a little concerning. Pinch the bridge of his nose, parsing through his well of big-brother knowledge to try to offer up some suggestions….
"I don't suppose a deep breath and counting to ten helps, does it?" he asked.
"It delays my reaction by ten seconds," she said.
Well at least she had tried that. "Maybe we need a more organic way to address this—I mean, at the core of this we can argue anger issues—"
"Excuse me?!"
"Case in point," Brock said coolly. "I don't know what went on between you and your sisters. I won't pretend to know what went on between you and your sisters. But what's evident to me is you got burned, and you're letting people poke it instead of letting it heal. So doesn't it make more sense to figure out a way to let it heal?"
Misty looked him up and down, processing that. "When did you become Dr. Spheal?"
"Things happen when you leave the TV on as background noise all the time. But you get what I'm saying, right?"
Misty looked away, considering.
"What about you?" she asked, looking back at him. "With you acting as team mom, apparently."
"I'm used to it," Brock said, shrugging.
"Yeah, but you need to be your own guy too instead of taking care of us all the time."
"Like I said, two people plus their Pokémon is a major vacation for me," he pointed out. "I'm getting some time for quiet introspection—you know, when you and Darkrai aren't fighting."
She ducked her head. "Fair enough—I'll give it a try."
"That's all I ask."
"So Brock has a problem with you and Misty getting along and that impacts the food so you two should get along better."
"Wow," Darkrai said flatly. "Did you even breathe during that?"
"I wanted to get it out of the way quickly," Ash admitted. "So. You and Misty get along better, Brock keeps cooking for us, everyone wins."
"Mmm, no."
"Brock will never make you another Oran cake if you two keep fighting."
"But did he actually say that?"
"It was very heavily implied."
"Misty's really nice," Charmander said, sitting with the egg in his paws. "I don't know why you two don't get along."
"Like I'm going to listen to you," Darkrai said.
"Ignore him," Pikachu told Charmander. "he's a grouch."
"I don't recall asking for your opinion either."
"So getting back on track," Ash said, picking up a rock and skipping it across the little…hm, a little big to be a pond but too small to be a lake, he could see the other side from here. "You and Misty get along, Brock's happy, and when Brock's happy that means the food keeps happening, you get Oran cakes, we're all happy. And the wild Pokémon won't run away because they couldn't stand you two arguing, so I can maybe catch a new Pokémon—I think Venonat was the last one, so it's been a while."
"Why does he need another Pokémon?" Charmander asked. "Was it something we did? Was it the Exeggutor thing? I thought he understood that none of us were in control should I be worried?"
"You should really stop panicking," Pikachu said.
"Although you really are very expendable," Darkrai said, scratching beneath his sawtooth ridge.
"No one's getting replaced," Ash said, skipping another rock. "I'm just talking about expanding the team a little—it's a little hard to be a Pokémon Master with only seven Pokémon."
"Seven and a half," Pikachu said, looking at the egg. "If whatever's in there ever decides to come out."
Charmander put his ear to the shell. "I think I hear something? Maybe it's like at the beach, where we heard the ocean in that shell."
Now that would be aggravating, to discover that he had gone and brought a dud all the way back from Sinnoh—it would explain the nonreaction it had to him…or perhaps the long flight back had rendered it inert, which would again be a problem. Forget trying to avert that bad future aside, the egg would be a bigger problem now if it turned rotten—at the very least, there was a good chance it'd go blooey in one of the backpacks and stink worse than a Gloom in summer.
Now Pikachu was listening at the shell. "I think I hear something—it's like when my sister was still in her egg. They don't really get active in there until maybe a day or two before they hatch."
"So you're an expert on the topic now?" Darkrai asked.
Pikachu flicked his ears back, forward, acknowledging the comment. "No…but I can guess who might be. Hold on."
They all watched him bound away.
"Where's Pikachu going?" Ash asked, looking at them.
"To see a 'mon about a Ponyta," Darkrai said, grooming himself a little.
"What do Ponyta have to do with anything?" Charmander asked blankly.
"It's an expression, genius."
Ash shrugged, let Patches out, both of them sitting in a nice grassy patch with Ash looking through the Pokédex by the time Pikachu came back, Bulbasaur trundling along behind him.
"Does this sound right to you?" Pikachu asked him, pointing at the egg.
Bulbasaur wrapped some vines around the egg, lifted it up, rocked it a little, brought over to his head to listen.
"It sounds all right," he said finally, handing it back to Charmander. "Some species take longer to hatch, that's all. Bulbasaur take longer than Pichu, for example."
"How long do Charmander take?" Charmander wondered, accepting the egg.
"About the same as Bulbasaur."
"What about Darkrai?"
"A very, very, very long time," Darkrai answered. "Understand that perfection takes a while."
Bulbasaur gave him a repressive look. "Also understand that you don't want hyper predators breeding like Rattata. There's ecosystems to consider."
Charmander pondered this. "So…whatever's in this egg could actually be really scary."
Bulbasaur was giving Darkrai that look again. "Possibly."
"Oh excuse you," Darkrai shot. "Like an infant Pokémon would have the sense to recognize the village idiot for what he is."
"Excuse you," Ash said, still looking at the Pokédex. "So Patches—this says you can learn Water Gun?"
Patches considered this—got up, went over to the pond, took a drink, turned and spit it out.
"That looked more like a spit take to me."
"It felt like it," Patches admitted.
"It did," Ash said. "But this reminds me."
Ash stood, pulled a Pokéball off his belt, and tossed it into the air. "Come on out, Lenny!"
There were a bunch of Magikarp that quickly displaced themselves upon finding their pond now had a Gyarados in it.
"Sorry!" Ash called, before waving to get Lenny's attention. "Let's try Hydro Pump! I think it's just Water Gun with more kick, right?"
"And a lot less accuracy," Darkrai said.
"A LOT less," Bulbasaur sighed, tugging on Charmander. "Come on, you, we don't want you getting splashed."
Charmander looked Lenny up and down before hustling after Bulbasaur, tail tucked up close and egg hugged to his chest. "Got me convinced."
"So the moral of the story is to pull a Gyarados out if you want peace and quiet," Darkrai mused.
"Seems counterintuitive," Pikachu said.
"Okay, let's try it!" Ash cheered. "Lenny! Try Hydro Pump!"
Lenny shot a blast of water at the far side of the shore.
"I don't know, that still feels like Water Gun to me," he said, looking at them.
Patches tried squirting water again. "I don't think this is working for me—pity too, that would have been cool."
"Very," Lenny said, watching him—ducked his head in, sucked up enough water to make the pond ripple, reared back up—gargled, of all the idiot things, before shooting what looked like a decent Hydro Pump across the way.
"All right, Lenny!" Ash cheered, jumping up and down. Lenny bounced, cheering—
"OI!"
"Ah!" Ash yelped—Lenny flinched and Patches and Pikachu's ears shot up. "I'm sorry I'm sorry!"
"Well that happened," Darkrai sighed, watching as Ash ran around the pond, Lenny and Patches hastening after him. "Someone probably ought to get the yutz-sitters."
"Yeah—not it!" Pikachu yelped, bolting after Ash.
"Hold it—ugh," he grumbled under his breath, floating off to find Brock.
Maybe pretending that Misty didn't exist would ensure he wasn't cut off from his Oran cakes.
"Sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry—"
Patches was honestly impressed that Ash could keep that up the whole way. Less impressed by Pikachu catching up, mostly because Pikachu were actually built for maintained speed, unlike Nidorino.
In the meantime—they had reached where Lenny's maybe-Hydro Pump had hit. It was pretty impressive, several trees blasted in half, and a girl looking everything over and assessing the damage.
"Sorry sorry sorry I didn't think anyone was over here!" Ash yelped, reaching her and bowing deeply with hands clasped. "We didn't hit anyone did we?"
"No," the girl said, blinking at him, at Patches and Pikachu, at Lenny, back at Ash. "I was just gathering plants, but that was, you know, kind of a shock…you're kind of off the beaten track, aren't you?"
"We kinda ditched the route after we hit all those fences," Ash admitted, rubbing the back of his head.
"Oh—there used to be a lot of riders around here—they made those fences to discourage—"
"Ash!"
"Hi, guys," Ash greeted, waving as Misty and Brock came running up. "This is…um…."
"Cassandra," the girl said.
"Cassandra—this is Misty and—"
"Brock," Brock said, down on one knee in front of her. "Brock is the name—if you don't mind me asking, what are you doing way out here?"
"And if you don't mind me asking, what are you doing?" Misty asked, tugging on Brock's ear.
"I actually live here," Cassandra said, pointing through the woods. "I run an apothecary with my gran."
"Even better," Brock said, scrambling upright and away from Misty. "It'd be good to stock up on medical supplies—we're not sure how close we are to the next town."
"Stone Town's just over at the base of that mountain," Cassandra said, pointing. "There's some construction on the other side of it—but there's been construction going on for as long as I can remember, so at this point it's just something worth mentioning so you know about it."
"Fair enough—can we see your shop?"
"Sure! Follow me!"
Patches followed, twitching his ears—this seemed to be going much better than the incident with the Exeggutor, as far as he could tell.
"What do you think?" he asked Pikachu, as the trainers returned the other Pokémon.
"I think anything happens, you go right, I go left," Pikachu said.
Patches nodded—sounded like a plan to him.
Now here was hoping it was an unnecessary one.
Cassandra happily chatted with Brock the whole way through the woods on the topic of herbs and other medicines, something which Ash tuned out about three minutes in.
"So what I'm getting is that potions and berries are only one option," Misty said during a lull in conversation.
"Yeah," Cassandra said. "There's plenty of homeopathic remedies—straight herbs aren't liked by most Pokémon though, since they're terribly bitter. Our homemade stuff cuts that bitterness down enough that Pokémon don't seem to mind as much though—Gran's an expert."
"Are you telling tales about me?"
"No, Gran," Cassandra said, as they reached a trimmed lawn and a clean cabin.
"Well you should be!" an old lady on the porch said. "Who's all this then?"
"This is Ash, Misty, Brock, and their Pokémon. Trainers, this is my grandmother."
"Ah, so they're customers!" she said brightly. "Well what can I interest you in? We've got a snakegrass here that'll cure what ails you and grow hair on your nose and tongue!"
"Uh…no," Ash said.
"Definitely not," Misty agreed.
"Does it come in a hair-free version?" Brock asked.
"Why would you even want hair on your tongue?" Ash added.
"Don't know," the old lady admitted. "No one's ever tested it for me. No matter—got some herbs and spices that'll make your Pokémon more friendly to you as well! Some mixtures and tinctures that'll increase their strength and endurance—list me something you want and I'll cook it up for you!"
"Something that makes me a Pokémon master!" Ash said, figuring he might as well go for broke.
"Son, you think if I could do that I'd be sitting in a cabin in the woods instead of in a mansion with that cute DiCaprio kid skimming my pool?"
"I guess not."
"You'll have to excuse my gran," Cassandra said.
"No, I get where she's coming from," Misty said.
"I like you," the old lady decided. "You can come over for tea sometime and watch Leo clean the pool."
Cassandra sighed, eyes closed, looked like she was counting to ten. "Anyway…our potions and tinctures have slowed down some since our old Parasect died—sad to say it, but until my Paras evolves we've had to up the price on things."
"A Paras?" Ash asked.
"Yeah—come on, Timtim, come meet these nice people."
Ash followed her gesture, spotted a Paras peeking out from under the old lady's hem before ducking back under the rocking chair.
"Oh get out there, they won't bite," the old lady said, waited until the Paras had gone about halfway. "Much."
"Gran."
"Hey that's cool though—I have a Paras too!" Ash said, tugging off Frenzy's Pokéball and letting him out.
"Very nice," Cassandra said, as her Paras minced over to peer at Frenzy. "The problem is, I need a Parasect—their spores are more potent than Paras spores, which is important for our work. But since Timtim is scared of fighting, I have to wait for him to evolve the old-fashioned way."
"Old-fashioned way?" Ash asked.
"Sometimes Pokémon will evolve without battling," Brock said. "It's just that battling lets them reach the prerequisites for their evolution faster. Paras generally evolve around Level Twenty-Four—come to think of it, Frenzy should have evolved by now."
They all looked at Frenzy, sitting there placidly.
"I'm pretty sure he'd evolve if you asked him," Misty pointed out.
"That's probably true," Ash admitted.
"Your Paras evolving wouldn't solve my problem though," Cassandra sighed. "I think Timtim's afraid to evolve. Actually, I think he's afraid of most things."
"So maybe we help him with that," Ash decided. "What if…we had some mock-battles, where Timtim's guaranteed to win? Maybe that'd bolster his confidence some?"
Cassandra considered this. "Maybe…Gran, what do you think?"
"I think it's an excellent idea," the old lady said. "Much better than what's on TV right now."
"Leo must not be on," Misty said.
"Shame too."
"Okay then!" Ash said brightly. "Let's start with Frenzy!"
Probably wasn't a good idea that everyone currently travelling with him gave him a nonplussed look.
"Ash," Misty said finally. "You said you wanted to help Cassandra's Paras, not turn him into sawdust."
"Frenzy will be fine—won't you Frenzy?" Ash asked.
Frenzy just sat there, as per usual—Cassandra's Paras blinked at him, tipped a little considering him…you know what, comparing him side-by-side with another Paras there was something kind of off about him.
"I'm just gonna…sit over here, away from the carnage," Brock said, heading for the cabin.
"Ooh, nice," the old lady said, looking Brock up and down when he neared. "Very nice, you can sit right there."
"I'm starting to think I want to be like you when I grow up."
"A worthy goal," she said, nodding as he sat down on the edge of the porch.
"Okay, Frenzy, it's very simple," Ash said, hunkering down next to Frenzy as the others reached the porch. "That Paras is going to come over and hit you with an attack, and all you have to do is keel over like you were beat. Okay?"
Frenzy didn't give a response—or any indication that he had heard.
"I'm going to take that as a yes," Ash decided, standing. "You ready Cassandra?"
"Ready!" Cassandra said, on the other end of the lawn. "Timtim! Hit that Paras with Scratch! That doesn't mean hide behind me," she scolded, when Timtim scuttled behind her. "Go over there and attack that Paras!"
"Just one little battle, Timtim!" Brock called. "Then we can have lunch!"
"Yeah, Brock's a really good cook!" Misty added.
"Please tell me you have an older single relative," the old lady said to Brock.
"Not that I know of, but I'll let you know if I find out differently," he said.
Cassandra's Paras, meanwhile, did finally mince out, trembling as it came over to Frenzy, who still hadn't moved—gingerly reached out and tapped Frenzy on the head before scuttling backwards.
Frenzy stood there a moment—
And then keeled over sideways, legs curled up like a dead Spinarak's.
"All right, Timtim! That's the way!" Cassandra cheered. "Don't you feel good about yourself, winning a battle?"
Her Paras seemed to be processing this, dumbfounded—started bouncing around, excited.
"Great job, Frenzy!" Ash said—prompting Frenzy to flip back upright and scuttle over to him. "Very convincing loss."
"Very," Brock said, clapping his hands. "Now who's hungry?"
Cassandra and her gran volunteered some herbs and spices for Brock's soup, and over lunch on the porch gave them the lay of the land.
"Years and years ago there were more nomadic groups and Tauros drives," Cassandra's gran said. "Landowners started putting up fences to protect their crops, and made that maze that stumped you all on the route. Everyone admits they went overboard, but it's been left there as a landmark—gets decorated with Cornn during the fall."
"That does seem like the sort of thing that could slow a Ponyta," Brock mused. "It's not like they can make hairpin turns like that, or jump over."
"Those fences are sturdier than they look too—stopped most Tauros when they came by." Took a sip of her tea. "Ah, but that way of life is dying out now—the only time you see anything like that is during the great races. Should be one soon, I think."
"So you're on your gym run, right?" Cassandra asked Ash. "Where are you heading? Fuchsia?"
"We came from there, actually," Ash said. "We're heading up to Saffron to challenge Sabrina."
"Ooh, good luck with that."
"Yeah," Ash said. "But we have a plan."
"At least there's that," Cassandra said, looking at Frenzy. "Let me guess, going to try to catch a Ghost type and then main that and this guy?"
"Um…yeah, that's the plan."
"It's straightforward and easy to remember," Misty put in.
"Better sell you a tincture to ward off bad luck then," Cassandra's Gran said. "You're borrowing trouble trying to catch a ghost."
"That's an old myth, Gran," Cassandra said.
"But we could use the tincture anyway," Brock said. "We seem to run into trouble wherever we go."
"That's not true," Ash protested. "Trouble just kind of waits around to ambush us."
"When it's not dropping down on us," Misty added.
Which was when they heard a strange noise—realized it was screaming, couldn't place the source—
Everyone jumped when Team Rocket came crashing down on the lawn.
"AAAAAAAAAAA…I…am not dead!" Meowth cheered, finally taking stock of himself. "I am not dead!"
"My whole life flashed before my eyes!" Jessie said, propping herself up a little before considering. "It was really very boring."
"I should have been more outgoing in high school," James opined, still sprawled on the ground.
"What happened to you guys?" Misty asked.
"You guys happened, dat's what," Meowth spat.
"That was…like, yesterday, though," Ash said. "You guys can't have been airborne this whole time…right?"
"We got snagged on a passing Rayquaza," James said, finally sitting up. "Had to wait until it circled back around before trying to get off." Pause, considering. "Hoenn is very lovely this time of year, by the way."
"You got snagged on a passing Rayquaza," Misty repeated, sounding like she couldn't decide what part of that was the most ridiculous.
"Yes," Jessie said, before looking at James. "We really should have tried to catch it."
"No," Meowth said, hopping up and shaking ice shards out of his fur. "One, it's got a super-low catch rate, and two, I was not attacking some big sky snake while we was sailin' over da ocean. And you lot," he added, jabbing a paw at Ash, Misty and Brock. "Causa youse I am cold, I am wet, I am—is dat soup?" he asked, padding over to Brock.
"Who are these people?" Cassandra asked.
"Team Rocket," Ash said, pointing his spoon. "Jessie, James, Meowth. They're mostly harmless."
"Excuse you," Jessie sniffed, lining up behind Meowth for a hit of the soup.
"I'll have you know we are part of a terrifying criminal organization!" James said.
"And I am single and in need of a pool and a pool boy to skim it," Cassandra's Gran said. "How solid is this job?"
James hesitated. "Honestly, after that flight it's kind of wobbly."
"Gran," Cassandra hissed.
"I dunno, how youse gonna break dat news to da boss?" Meowth asked.
"Good question," James said.
"Better question," Cassandra's Gran said. "Is your boss single?"
"GRAN!" Cassandra squawked, apparently completely at her wit's end.
"Okay, that woman is a life goal," Jessie said, pointing at Cassandra's Gran.
"Same," Misty agreed.