First Fanfiction! I hope you enjoy it! (No copyright intended, all characters belong to Cassandra Clare)

CASTLES MADE OF SAND, CHAPTER NINETEEN

Ask me Why

"If I cry, It's not because I'm sad, but you're the only love that I've ever had.
Ask me why, I'll say I love you, And I'm always
thinking of you."

"ALEXANDER!" Maryse nearly shattered Alec's ear drums, as he peaked his head into the front living room, where Maryse was structurally sitting in a peach colored arm chair—her face, indicated to Alec that she had probably been waiting in that spot for a couple of hours, already. Deep, dark circles lined the skin just shy of her blazing blue eyes, and her mouth was pulled into a hard scowl. Alec shuttered at her tone of voice. Yes, it was now more than evident that she had been waiting up for him for a long, long time.

"Hey mom..." Alec stood up straight, and walked further in the room, from around the corner he had been peaking out of. He clasped his hand at the back of his neck, and rubbed the skin there nervously.

"Where were you? Jace didn't see you after school, Izzy didn't either, no one saw you! You weren't answering your phone! Alec," Maryse rambled then stood from her seat, and walked over to the middle of the room, where Alec was no standing. "Do you know how worried I was? What if... What if something happened to you..." Maryse gazed at him with that same type of fragility that cut right through Alec's heart. That same gaze usually, melted his soul entirely, and destroyed his conscience because he knew without a doubt that he could have stopped what happened four years ago... Alec turned his head away. In everything Maryse did, she put her full and honest undivided emotion into it, which was mostly a good thing, and in other cases a terrible horrible fate. Alec cringed, he should have thought of Maryse being worried—it wasn't fair of him to do that to his mother, who had lost so much already, because of him...

Alec shook his head; thoughts in the same context of those, always led to the memories, and he had been practising so hard, for four years to forget. "Mom, I'm sorry. I should have mentioned something, but I just went out to this lake with a friend—" His throat seized up at the word friend. He was treading in hot water now with Magnus, and he knew that—But really he couldn't help how he felt; and essentially he 'felt' so much for Magnus, he couldn't quite wrap his head around the first time that the onslaught of feelings had come into play.

"Alec!" Maryse scolded. "Who is she? If you did anything at that lake, I swear to god..." Maryse eclipsed out of her somber mood, and turned back into the dotting parent. Which now, Alec wished she hadn't. His face burned bright red at her accusations—Alec felt as if his skin was bursting into flames, relentless on simmering down.

"I—Mom—No! I was with Magnus," Alec gingerly admitted, his eyebrows pierced sharply together on his forehead in doubt. Maryse's eyes flickered with an uncertain emotion—as if she, herself, was trying to find her way through a labyrinth, but alas couldn't find the end—the full truth. Alec desperately wanted to know what she was thinking; Maryse was always thinking—sorting out things within her own mind, attempting to decipher things in her own sort of way. She was stubborn like that; always so concentrated on her views, rather than taking account of others.

She straightened her emotions, her face instantly reforming back to its delicate but firm motherly look. "That's good that you are expanding your friendships, Alec. Just next time give me or your father a warning, okay?" Maryse placed the pad of her thumb along the angular arch of Alec's eyebrow, not meeting his eyes. And frankly, Alec felt as if he were given a subtle blessing—he didn't want to come face to face with the emotions swimming in her eyes. Because like Alec, Maryse usually, if not all the time, barred her emotions to the world through her vibrant glassy blue eyes.

Alec raised his hand to hers, and interlocked their fingers together, bringing her hand back down to her side."I promise, next time I will." Alec smiled faintly, to the ground, and shook his head, laughing a bit, "If there is a next time, that is." Maryse smiled, without her teeth up at him, and fixed her pajama shirt, lazily.

"I hope you're hungry. I've been slaving away all morning to make a nice Saturday brunch." Maryse said heartily, retreating her steps to the doorway, which led into their brightly lit kitchen. She had some weird sort of bounce in her step today, which made Alec think, that besides her worrying about him and where he was last night—that something good had happened, which had made her happier than she was as of late. It was a nice sight to see, because usually his mother was somber, and, well, for a lack of better phrasing, overly motherly.

"Uhh," Alec scratched the back of his neck, following her steps into the kitchen, in long lengthy strides. "Magnus already took me out for breakfast, sorry..." He trailed off, stopping abruptly in the middle of the kitchen, when he saw just how massive the brunch Maryse had made, was. All across the breakfast nook table, which sat in the indent of a bay window off to the far left side of the kitchen, lay rows upon rows of perfectly laid dishes of food. There were fresh flaky butter rolls staked so high, it was on the verge of toppling over, a plate designated for a dozen Eggs Benedict's with fresh cyan pepper lacing the top as a garnish, steaming fluffy pancakes and waffles on one tray, a wide assortment of fruits on another, and a whole tray dedicated to strips of salty bacon and plump sausages.

"Are you trying to make us have diabetes or something?" Alec asked in astonishment—both, at the amount of food, and at the gesture of Maryse cooking this huge meal. "Do you actually think, me, Jace and Iz, can pack away all of this?"

"It isn't just for you three—"

"Okay. Did you think, me, Jace, Iz and dad could eat all of this?" Alec gestured with his arms out wide, to the table. He noticed then, that there were seven place settings instead of five...

"Hey," Jace walked through the archway which was connected to the hallway, that led down to their bedrooms. This kitchen had an insane amount of entrances. One which led from the formal living room, another from the front foyer, one leading into the bedroom section of the house, and finally a small door which led to the backyard—or back woods as it was. "Missed you yesterday," Jace said gaily, wrapping his arms around Alec's shoulders from the back, nudging his head into the crook of Alec's neck.

"Off," Alec semi-laughed, wiggling out of his grasp, and turned to Jace, who looked as if he had just woken up; which he probably did—his hair plastered to the right side of his face, stuck there by small swatches of sweat. He had a lopsided grin stretched over his face, and was clad in blue checkered pajama pants, and a sheer white t-shirt, which showed off his bronze defined muscles well.

"Where did you go? I almost had a heart attack Alexander!" Jace laughed, as Alec shoved at his chest, having to restrain his laughter as well.

"I was just out, with Magnus." Alec shrugged, and leaned back against the marble counter top, crossing his arms lazily over his chest.

"All night? What were you two doing?" Jace quirked an eyebrow high, and tilted his head to the side. Alec straightened his back in horror that he had been caught somehow—caught for what though?—and was about to protest; defend himself in a way—just before his eyes caught a flash of red sweeping up, from behind Jace.

"Hey Alec!" Clary smiled, and crossed the room to stand beside Jace. She leaned the side of her hip into Jace's almost absently, and smiled up at Alec. Her hair was a bright birds nest of scarlet curls, her cheeks flush—highlighting her freckles even more, and her eyes a livid flickering emerald green. Alec gazed at her, astonishment lacing his features. It was as if she were some type of foreign invader, who snuck into their house.

"Hey, when did you get here?" Alec asked.

"Slept over," Clary shrugged. Alec's eyes widened, and her turned to face Maryse, who didn't seem fazed at all by the fact Clary had slept over. It wasn't exactly a set in stone rule that the Lightwood kids weren't allowed to have friends of the opposite sex sleepover at the house—especially if there was sexual tension between them—but it was still something none of them dared to do. Maryse made her way over to the fridge, and began to shuffle through it, looking for god knows what else she could possibly set on the table.

"Mom actually let her sleepover?" Alec whispered, leaning in closely to Jace.

"Yeep, I just asked and she said it was fine, as long as we were under her roof. Simon's here too—although, I have no idea where he has gone off to..." Jace glanced past his shoulder, and trained his eyes on the archway that led into the hall. As he did so, he snaked his arm around Clary's waist tenderly, and brought her even closer to his body—but not in a way, which could seem demanding or sexual, but in a very friendly un-Jace like way. As if he were treating her as an equal entity, that he wished to take care of, with the greatest gentleness. "Anyways," Jace returned his eyes to Alec, and placed his elbow on the rise of the island counter top, resting his chiseled chin in the palm of his hand. "What were you and Magnus up to? Where'd you go?"

"You were out with Magnus?" Clary asked, surprised. Definitely surprised; her expression and tone of voice said it all.

"Yeah, uhh, he took me to that lake of his," Alec answered gingerly.

"What lake?" Clary questioned, narrowing her small features in wonder. Alec realized then, that Magnus hadn't been lying to him, about the fact that besides Magnus and his mother, Alec was the only other person to lay eyes on that lake. Alec began to sift through his mind for a reasonable explanation, grappling for the right answer to give Clary, which would elude her away from the topic entirely.

"This lake near Idris." Alec said in a rush, "it took us a long time to get there, and that's why we just stayed the night at this, uhh, hotel—because it would've taken a long time to get back, and it would've been really late. So yeah," Alec took a deep inhale of breath, and shrunk his shoulders now. Clary smirked, and unlatched Jace's hand from her waist, and came to stand at Alec's side. She patted him on the shoulder sweetly, and nudged him in the side with her elbow.

"Okay, we'll go with that," she whispered faintly and winked. Winked. Somehow, she knew something; and Alec had no idea how. He thought he was doing a pretty fantastic job of keeping his emotions hidden ever since he walked into the house. Because really, on the inside he was floating in an abyss of happiness. His stomach still continued to do those unsettling ungodly flips and turns, his heart was still racing, pounding against the rib bones in his chest, asking silently to burst free. Alec's hands were still insanely clammy, slicked with sweat—after being with Magnus all of yesterday, and the partial bit of this morning, Alec couldn't seem to calm down, from the high he felt.

Maybe Clary could see straight through the barrier he was holding in front of himself? Maybe she was a much more perceptive person than Alec was led on to believe. He couldn't show indifference towards her though, because by doing that, he would only confirm whatever suspicions and or accusations she had within her mind.

"I told you the cream one! Not the white one!" Alec heard Isabelle shout, just shy of the doorway, as she swept into the kitchen. She was a heated frenzy of black waves, and glowing ivory skin. She had a scowl on her face, and was wearing a limp dark red tank top, and short spandex shorts, which shoved of her hour glass figure greatly. She basically flew past them all, beating Clary to the table, and threw herself into a seat on the right end. Alec watched Simon stalk after her, his glasses laying haphazardly on the bridge of his nose, his hair damp, dripping small droplets of water onto his plain dark green t-shirt. Alec was momentarily disappointed that Simon's shirt didn't have something catchy across the front, this time.

"Izzy, do you honestly think guys can tell the difference between cream and white? Light colors all look the same to me!" Simon huffed, and sat down in the seat opposite of her. Isabelle starred at him menacingly, and both Alec and Jace knew that look very well. They both turned to each other at the same time, Alec and Jace, shared a subtle glance, and both raised their fists to their mouths, attempting to hold back a strong hysteria of laughter.

Clary sat down next to Isabelle sheepishly, and Maryse returned to the table with a pitcher of orange juice in one hand, and apple juice in the other. Just the thought of the apple juice, pulled Alec back to his time with Magnus. Possibly for the next couple of days, he would find solace in anything that reminded him about Magnus, and he was okay with that. He really didn't find any harm in his mind shifting towards the thought of Magnus anymore, because really all the thoughts were oh so good.
"What did he do Izzy?" Maryse shook her head, and poured a glass of orange juice into her cup. It was weird having Maryse not care about having a house full of teenagers to deal with, while Robert was no where to be seen at the moment.

"He used my towel, and now its filthy!" Isabelle craned her neck up to peer at Maryse.

"Izzy, you can't be serious," Jace shook his head, and took the seat next to Clary, "that's the reason you just stormed in here like a tornado?"

"Well yes! Also the fact that he absolutely kept pissing me off—"

"Izzy," Maryse scolded shaking her head.

"The fact that he absolutely kept ticking me off," Isabelle corrected herself, "last night, just adds to it."

"I swear, you tripped into that mud bank on your own," Simon sighed, and reached out to grab a butter roll from the table, and ripped into it savagely, savouring the taste and fresh heat that wafted out of it in waves. Alec sat down next to him, and grabbed a few strips of bacon—probably the only thing he could stake down at the moment.

"I did not!" Isabelle placed her small palms flat on the table top, and leaned over the large space, to place her face rather close to Simon's. Simon shrinked back, and fixed his glasses on the bridge of his nose with his index finger. "You put out your foot on purpose. What, were you thinking I wouldn't notice? And then you could be the hero who saved me from that muddy mess and helped me up?"

"Oh yes Izzy, those were my intentions. You seem to have a knack for figuring everything out, down to a 'T'." Simon mocked, and grinned at her in a malicious manner. Isabelle's mouth went slack. No one ever really talked back to her in such a demanding tone—one usually shied away from getting into some sort of confrontation with Isabelle. She was this sultry beautiful 'come hither' girl on the outside, but once you really got to know her, she was this tough, warrior goddess, with a strangely abrasive and challenging nature.

Alec wanted to congratulate Simon for having the sheer courage to take arms against her. But he thought better of it; and instead sat there, watching as Isabelle's face shifted with multiple emotions. They all fell into a sort of comfortable silence after that, loading their plates high with food and just eating and enjoying the company really. Maryse had left the table five minutes into eating, saying she had to be somewhere important, and told them to clean up after they were finished.

"Sebastian's having a party on Sunday." Clary said, raising a piece of her pancake to her mouth.

"Sunday? Is he insane? We have school on Monday," Alec quirked his head to the side, pursing his thin lips together in wonder.

"Mmm, that's what usually happens around here. A party is a party, and whenever one comes up, you don't skip out on it." Clary shrugged, and leaned back in her chair a bit. She looked like a doll sitting in the chair, so short and petite in frame size, as compared to Jace who was sitting beside her. "And besides, this one is a kind of—stay the night party. We can all get rides in the morning together, instead of showing up at home hungover before we leave." Clary smiled, a devious vixen type of smile.

She was daring but sweet, cautious but strongly perceptive. Everything about her somehow contradicted itself, creating this confident, kind, understanding girl. Now, Alec could partially see what attracted Jace to her. Jace liked girls who were stubborn, but had a heart all at the same time—girls who he could treat as an equal, rather than something fragile—and that fit Clary perfectly.

"Okay, we're going. We haven't been to a party yet, since we've moved here." Jace smirked, and rested his arm around the back of Clary's chair, and with the other arm reaching up high in the air, Jace stretched his back out.

"Will you be there Simon?" Isabelle asked, rather nicely, batting her thick long eyelashes in a subdued cute manner.

"Yeah, of course. Sebastian's parties are usually insanely awesome." Simon suggested, and stood from the table, taking his plate with him over to the sink which was overlooked by a large window, gazing out onto their portion of the back woods.

"Well, then I'm not going." Isabelle tipped her head back to regard him, and smirked viciously. Simon just rolled his eyes, and continued to scrub down his plate with a bright neon orange wash cloth. As a side thought, Alec couldn't help but feel like Simon and Clary just belonged so naturally in this scenario with them. Clary sitting close to Jace, talking in whispered hushes about god knows what, Alec finishing off his pieces of bacon, whipping off the last lingering bits of sleep from his eyes, Simon scrubbing down his dishes as if it were a chore he naturally did everyday at their house, and Isabelle sitting with her legs kicked up on the table, picking at her nails.

"Iz, stop being rude." Alec shook his head, and picked up his plate, and made his way over to Simon.

"Si, who are we getting a ride with?" Clary leaned back in her chair a bit, red curls cascading around her, in a fiery intricate design.

"Probably Will and Magnus, I suppose." Simon shrugged, and took Alec's dish out of his hands. Alec shivered at Magnus' name. And mainly at the thought of Magnus being at the party with them lit some type of fire within Alec, setting his nerves on a speed rush. Sunday—tomorrow was Sunday. That didn't give nearly the amount of time Alec would have wished for, to settle his emotions down, before seeing Magnus again. But then again, he shouldn't be so nervous about a public event. The probability of Magnus spending most of his night around Alec was slim to none—he had other friends at the party to be around, friends who he was much closer with, than he was with Alec. Friends who had multiple parts of Magnus' life interwoven with their own.

But for some nagging reason, Alec felt that, the mere fact Magnus had brought him to the lake yesterday, an obvious sentimental place for Magnus—made Alec feel as if, he already had a piece of Magnus' past and or life to hold on to. A sort of hope for future events to arise.

A/N: Sorry this was a day late! The documents that I edit this on, weren't working yesterday. But you'll be happy to know, that with the added time I was given, I have finished two more chapters, that I will post soon (: ! The first part of this chapter, with Alec and Maryse is somewhat pre-luding to something that happened in the past (which will be explained in a coming chapter), that gives indication as to why Alec is trying to avoid Maryse' gaze. The rest, is to somewhat infuse Clary and Simon even more into the story line, because yes they do play a part in it. As do all of the characters, in their own little ways. I also wanted to show how Jace is very gentle with Clary, and how Alec sees that as something very different from any of the other times Jace has taken a fond liking to a girl. And if you haven't noticed by now, I like starting out relationships in a way, which makes it much more tangible, and I feel as if starting it by the two sides being at some type of odds gives it that much more realism. Because seriously, most if not all of my guy friends piss the hell out of me, but after even the shortest amount of time, I learn to love them.
Party? Well... That should be interesting to write, I've got a few things up my sleeve (;

Review please! All of your guys' reviews are amazing, and I just smile like crazy when I get a notification.
Let's get it to 230!

Amber,