First Fanfiction! I hope you enjoy it! (No copyright intended, all characters belong to Cassandra Clare)

CASTLES MADE OF SAND, CHAPTER THIRTY SIX

I've Got a Feeling

"All these years I've been wandering around the world, Wondering how come nobody told me
All that I was looking for was somebody, Who looked like you.
I've got a feeling that keeps me on my toes
Oh yeah, Oh yeah."

Alec didn't really know what he was planning to do. All he knew was that he couldn't stand being away from Magnus any longer without talking to him and or seeing him. So, with much difficulty, Alec remembered the roads and paths upon the hill tops in which Magnus had taken to get to his house, and began to walk—for he would never dare to drive—to the Bane manor. It was nearing midnight by the time he had finally made it to the black slate driveway of the Bane manor; the sky was darker than lake water at night, with gleaming stars clustered everywhere in the sky. It was a beautiful night—cool calm fresh air waved around him, rustling his hair and taming the heat of his skin. The muscles in his legs were starting to ache, due to the strenuous walk, but at this point Alec knew that whatever he endured was worth it; as long as he got to see Magnus and had the chance to talk to him about what had happened the previous night.

Alec took a deep breath in as he made his way past the Weeping Angel fountain that stood tall in the middle of the large drive way, and on to the grass around the base of the dark house. He had hoped that his memory was as sharp as he deemed it to be; and likewise that his perceptions weren't off, because what he was about to do could turn out disastrous. He bent down and picked up a hand full of small stones that were littered around the base of the brooding dark manor; and with faith in his good arm, he stepped back a bit and let the stone fly through the air—softly as to not shatter anything—and instantly, after being launched, it clicked with the bedroom window on the second floor, which was his intended path.

Nothing happened for a second and he thought he might have gotten the wrong room based on his perception, so he tried again for good measure—lodging the stone through the air, waiting and listening to hear that faint click it made against the glass of the window. A small light flickered on inside of the room and a moment later Alec could see the shadow of someone walking across the floor of the bedroom, against the ceiling. He breathed a sigh of relief that he had picked the right room. He could see Magnus' silhouette through the window, although Magnus couldn't quite see Alec yet. He had something white in his right hand and with difficulty he raised his window with his free hand, letting the midnight air flow through his room.

"Alexander?" Magnus whispered, although it was loud enough for Alec to hear. "What... What are you—?" Magnus peered down at him in questioning. Maybe Alec should have warned Magnus he was on his way over... "Hold on one second," Magnus said before he lowered his window and left. Alec took a moment to gather his thoughts and walked over to the front of the house, taking his time on the slick black steps of the estate. He waited on the threshold for a minute or two before the ominous waxy front door was opened. Magnus stood there wearing soft purple cotton pajama bottoms that hung off of his hips in a dangerous way, and no shirt. His defined 'V' made Alec gulped loudly, and he felt a searing heat rise up to the apples of his cheeks. It took him a moment to return his gaze to Magnus' face, but eventually he had somehow torn his eyes away from, quite possibly, his favorite part of Magnus' body.

"You know, I'm not in the mood to fight at all." Magnus stated; his mouth was set in a hard line. He leaned the right side of his body against the door frame, and crossed his tanned arms over top of his lightly toned chest. "So, why are you here?" His voice was bleak, almost void of any emotion. And Alec expected that really, for the way he had treated Magnus the night previous; and at least Magnus wasn't acting callous towards Alec.

"To apologize." Alec instantly replied. He placed his hand on the back of his neck, rubbing the fine hairs mixed with a little bit of fresh sweat there, in his nervous tendency. "Look, Magnus, I was being selfish... I'm not..." Alec sighed loudly. "I'm not used to this at all,"

"Used to what, Alexander?" Magnus earnestly asked, flicking a few stray pieces of his thick black hair out of his face, by a swift tilt of his head. He sounded intrigued by Alec's statement at least; urging Alec to continue.

"To feeling this way." He simply replied. "To feeling as if I always have to be around you, or else I become completely restless. To feeling as if sometimes you are the only thing that can make me truly happy. To feeling as if... As if I'm on fire all the time from just the simple looks you give me. I—I can't describe exactly what it is, or what it means. But I just know that it is there, and I had hoped that you felt the same way—"

"I do feel the same way," Magnus cut Alec off and pushed himself off of the door frame, stepping out, slightly, onto the black steps with bare feet.

"You do?" Alec knit his eyebrows tightly on his forehead, his tone of voice was filled heavily with shock; which in turn made him feel all that more guilty about doubting how Magnus could feel about him. He knew that his face was flushed with color at the thought, but he didn't necessarily care about that at the present moment.

"Yes, you idiot." Magnus laughed and shook his head from side to side briefly. "What I said, when we were... Well, fondling," Alec gulped loudly again, "each other—that just slipped out Alexander. I don't exactly know where that came from." Magnus admitted as he sighed and dropped his arms back to his sides. He took a step closer to Alec, walking further out into the cold night to stand directly in front of Alec—regarding him with watchful yellow-green cat eyes. He hesitated slightly in raising his hand to cup Alec's jaw—but seemed to find it within himself to still do so. Magnus' hands were so cold against Alec's heated skin; he took to brushing his thumb against the bone of Alec's cheek, in a calming gesture as he gazed at Alec's lips with a sort of determination. "You know that you're so much more to me than just a distraction." Magnus stated in a husky whisper. "Or at least you should know that. And maybe, I should have told you."

Instinctively, and rather absent-minded, Alec began to lean his body closer to Magnus—wanting desperately, now, to taste the sweet spearmint that, he knew, laced Magnus' lush lips and tongue. He wanted to run the tips of his fingers down the subtle muscles of Magnus' chest and stomach; dance his fingers across the lines of his deep 'V'. Burning desire was something they would always have between them, there was no doubt about that. The need Alec had for Magnus, surpassed anything Alec had ever felt before; and quite readily it annoyed him insanely—because he was his own contradiction: he both wanted to satisfy Magnus' and his own desires, but he wasn't all too sure if his nerves would catch up with him during the act or not.

Magnus tilted his head slightly to the left, silently inviting Alec to a kiss, in which he took his opportunity rather greedily. He needed this, he thought, as his lips connected with Magnus'—softly at first, but then instantly it spiked to an alarming intensity. Alec sucked on Magnus' bottom lip delving it into his mouth, and Magnus whimpered at the pressure as he brought his arms up and around Alec's neck—pulling him closer. The small whimper Magnus made only caused Alec to want to be so much closer to him, and he wasn't going to hold back much now. He wrapped his arms around the top of Magnus' waist—just under his rib bones—and tugged Magnus to his body, so that their chests were crushed together—heaving against one another.

Magnus pulled his head back a bit, denying Alec for a brief moment of his lips. "You know, despite what I just said, I really don't mind what we were doing yesterday..." Magnus quirked his eyebrow high with a sly smirk on his face.

"Your room?" Alec asked and or suggested really, with a confident smile tugging at the corners of his lips. He took delight in the shocked expression on Magnus' face—his mouth falling open for a short second before he snapped it back in place.

"It is a bit cold out here isn't it?" Magnus smiled and gave Alec a quick peck on the lips, while he unclasped his hands from around Alec's neck. "Well, are you going to let me go or...?" Magnus glanced down at Alec's arms still wrapped tightly around his waist, and back up into Alec's eyes playfully. Alec dipped his head down a bit, and nuzzled the side of Magnus' neck—to Magnus' surprise—and placed a soft kiss onto the throbbing pulse point.

"Do I have to?" He asked in a more than husky voice. Biting his lip he returned to gazing into Magnus' eyes; instantly taking pleasure in the way Magnus was starring at his lips with a silent threat.

"If you want to make it up the stairs quieter and... Faster... Then yeah, Alexander. You're going to need to let me go." Magnus laughed and raised his left hand to the swatch of skin just above Alec's eyebrow—stroaking the pad of his thumb over top of it softly. "Come on lovely. I have something to show you." Alec reluctantly let go and Magnus turned to face the doorway; walking back into his darkened manor house.

"That makes me nervous," Alec blushed, and followed Magnus into the front foyer, closing the door slowly—as to not create so much noise. He kicked his shoes off, and placed them next to the front door. Somehow, when Alec stepped into the house, he felt a wave of melancholy and dread hit him swiftly. It was a sort of sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach that all wasn't right in the house. It felt like something must have been missing, but that was just Alec's assumptions getting away on him.

Magnus threw Alec a smirk over his shoulder and began to take the stairs two at a time. He moved like a cat—lithel and silent—his steps were measured and graceful. It was an eerie thought to think that Magnus could walk around so silently, as Alec found his feet to be making a much more prominent sound. Alec tended to walk without picking up the backs of his feet—finding it so much easier to just shift over top of every surface without straining his knees, and maybe that was one of the habits he had picked up from being a soccer player; a habit he wished he didn't have as they continued up the left side of the grand staircase.

Alec watched Magnus' hips all the way up; decidedly swooning over the slight dip he had in his step, making his hips sway from side to side slightly. In a matter of moments they had finally made it to Magnus' bedroom which was lowly lit by one of his bedside table lamps. Alec hadn't realized it until the moment he had walked into Magnus' bedroom; but his heart was beating a mile per minute. The thought of continuing what they had been doing in the music room yesterday quite readily freaked Alec out, but also in this case his desires won over. He trusted Magnus—trusted that whatever they did together was right for the both of them. And he hoped Magnus felt the same way.

"What's that?" Alec pointed to a small white lump on top of Magnus' canary sheets, while he closed the door to Magnus' room as silently as he could. His white comforter was thrown to the foot of the high bed, for whatever reason Alec was unaware of. Magnus walked over to his bed and gently picked up the white lump and placed it within his arms. It was a kitten from what Alec could tell as Magnus drew closer to him; a small kitten, no bigger than the size of his foot quite possibly.

"His name is Chairman Meow," Magnus smiled as he handed over the small kitten to Alec. It was purring vicariously and was softer than his mother, Maryse's, fresh sheets after she had them out, blowing in the wind, on the clothes lines all afternoon.

"Chairman Meow?" Alec questioned with a grin on his face; he couldn't break his gaze away from the kitten in his hands.

"Don't ask," Magnus laughed and then gestured for Alec to give the kitten back to him. "Jem got him for me this morning... Essentially." Alec complied in handing over the kitten, although he would have loved to pet Chairman Meow for an even longer time, and Magnus went to place Chairman onto the bright red chair he had—which was situated beside his electric blue vanity table. After that Magnus began to strip out of his pajama bottoms—scaring Alec briefly because at first he hadn't thought there wasn't anything underneath—and fortunately—or unfortunately—he was wearing pale orange boxers. Magnus laid back on his bed, and placed his hands behind his head watching Alec with a look Alec could only describe as carnal lust. It was intimidating but made every nerve ending in Alec's body spark with delight.

He walked over to the edge of the bed and stared down at Magnus with hooded lake blue eyes. He stretched and pulled the back hem of his black t-shirt up his back and over his head; revealing his pale white toned torso to Magnus—watching closely as Magnus' eyes seemed to dilate to their full black state under the conditions. "On or off?" Alec gestured with his pointer finger to his jeans, that were becoming tighter and tighter under the circumstances.

"What kind of question is that?" Magnus scoffed and sat up, swinging his legs around the side of his high bed. He pulled Alec closer to him, by the backs of his thighs, so that now their knees were pressed together. He shot Alec a fox grin, and within a second popped the button open on Alec's jeans and pulled the zipper down. "If you're staying in my bed, I'm not going to have you wearing jeans, Alexander." Magnus said rather huskily and placed his lips onto the swatch of skin just underneath Alec's belly buttoned. Alec's hips jerked forward at the contact causing Magnus to laugh briefly while he trailed his lips slowly to the left side of Alec's hips—sucking strongly as he went.

Alec closed his eyes at the sensation and let out a heated groan that made Magnus start to nip at the skin just above the waist band of his blue and white checkered boxers. Alec threaded his hands into Magnus' sleek black hair, knotting his fingers into the soft spikes. "Magnus," Alec moaned as Magnus trailed his tongue back and forth; dipping it once underneath the band of Alec's boxers. He gave a substantial tug on Magnus' hair, earning the reward of hearing Magnus groan. "Wait," he pushed away from Magnus momentarily and shimmied out of his pants—letting them fall to the floor. He stepped out of them and bit his bottom lip in anticipation for where this was going.

Magnus watched him the whole time with a ferocious tinge to his eyes—wherever this deemed to go was definitely going to be one hell of a passionate journey. Without a second thought Alec placed himself onto Magnus' lap, straddling his hips and all at the same time pressed their throbbing cores together. The feeling was magnificent, Alec had to admit, and shocked him that he felt so connected to Magnus in a moment, like that. Alec grinned brightly at Magnus as he wrapped his pale arms around Magnus' cold tanned neck; in return Magnus snaked his large hands around Alec's sculpted warm waist and began to scratch the skin at the small of his back. Magnus took to Alec's collar and peppered kisses along the finally arched bone.

"Why did Jem bring you Chairman Meow?" Alec asked breathlessly; the thought popped into his head quite randomly. Magnus stilled in his movements, and breathing as it was, becoming ridge beneath Alec completely. "Oh, Magnus, if this is about your mother then—"

"No, Alexander." Magnus shook his head and then placed a small kiss onto Alec's chest, just above where his heart was placed. "Olive died last night—my dad told me this morning," he explained; taking a shuddering breath in at the end. Alec felt his stomach drop at that information; although he didn't personally know Olive, he could see and almost feel how much it affected Magnus. Alec was a sensitive soul; the thought of someone dying that was so close to Magnus made Alec flinch strongly at the thought. Alec crooked his finger underneath Magnus' chin and brought his head up, meeting Magnus' gaze. His yellow-green—now almost fully black—dialated eyes were partially glazed over.

"Magnus I'm here—I'll always be here for you. I hope you know that." Alec said whole heartily. He wasn't trying to pity Magnus, but more so reassure him that Alec was someone he could go to with any of his troubles. It certainly cracked something within Alec to see Magnus distressed in any way, and he would go to hell and back to take that feeling away from Magnus. He wanted to kiss and caress all of Magnus' worries away, but he wasn't sure if now was the right moment to do so anymore...

"I do Alexander. And not to make you feel as if you are a distraction right now... But I really can't handle the image of you on top of me, in my bed, half naked." Magnus blinked up at him. "I don't want to stop what we're doing just because of... Of what happened this morning. Because Alexander, I know I'm not okay." His usually evenly toned voice broke on the last few words; and Alec felt his own emotions react immensely to that subtle break. "But I do have to continue living. That's what Olive and my... Mother, would have wanted. So please, don't stop now. Don't let me hold you back."

"Magnus..." Alec whispered, his eyebrows knit tightly together low on his forehead.

"Please Alexander, I need you." Magnus pleaded; his eyes watchful and full of emotion—emotion Alec couldn't quite decipher. He didn't give it a second thought—because who was he to deny Magnus?—and pressed his hot lips firmly to Magnus'. He wasted no time and parted Magnus' lips with his tongue, shoving it into his mouth. Magnus gasped against Alec's lips as they started to fight for dominance—heat flowing between their bare chests. Alec started to rock against Magnus' core in a soft slow pattern at first, but in an instant he picked up speed, creating feverish jerky moves against Magnus' core that sent Alec almost to the edge of a fresh pool of ecstasy.

Magnus kept telling Alec to 'slow down' while they continued to groan and moan quite loudly together. That was something they needed to work on: being quiet. Magnus grasped Alec firmly on his butt and flipped them over on the bed—Alec falling underneath Magnus' body, as he hovered over top of him. They kept kissing; stealing the breath completely out of one another's lungs; gasping at the briefest friction that their cores were making when Alec rolled up and Magnus ground down; moaning around and against each others lips and tongues. Everything was just so fast, but completely measured at the same time. They rose and fell against one another in very rhythmical waves pushing each other closer and closer to the edge.

Magnus trailed his hand down the front of Alec's torso and skillfully manoeuvred his cold hand underneath the waistband of Alec's boxers and grasped the base of his member. "Magnus!" Alec hoarsely shouted but was silenced seconds later by a deep longing kiss on his lips. He squirmed underneath Magnus trying to create even more friction between Magnus' hand and his shaft—he jerked his hips up in response to Magnus' ministrations. The feeling of Magnus' hand stroking up and down then up again in a hurried motion was unlike any sensation Alec had ever felt. Magnus was now shoving Alec passed the point of ecstasy, drawing out broken gasps and moans from Alec's thin lips. "Faster," Alec demanded as Magnus began to twist the palm of his hand over the head of Alec's member over and over again, running his thumb against the strong vein on the underside. "Yes, uhh," Alec grunted, "Magnus, faster," he panted around his grunts and groans of pleasure.

Alec arched his head into Magnus shoulder, raised his left hand into Magnus' hair, and bit down rather harshly on the skin along his shoulder—as he attempted to suppress his scream of ecstasy—while he tugged strongly on a few black tresses of hair. His whole body shuddered as he released all of the pent up frustration that, if he were honest, was building up within him since he had set eyes on Magnus. He felt weightless as he came down from his high—the muscles in his body went completely limp, but at the same time he felt sedated by the rush of pleasure still coursing hotly through his veins. His eyes were shut tightly together as he tried to even out his laboured breath. He felt Magnus' hand leave him and he opened his eyes to see Magnus unceremoniously wipe his palm onto his canary yellow sheets.

Alec grinned and laughed at that, meeting the melting gaze of Magnus' eyes. They glittered with fascination and excitement, mixed with a beaming amount of lust and desire. "I—I think I'll need to borrow a pair of your boxers in the morning," Alec blushed feverishly at the implication of that—his face flushing brightly with a scarlet color. Magnus laughed and ducked his head down to kiss Alec on his tomato red cheek.

"No problem, lovely." Magnus' voice seemed a bit forced and it took Alec a second to realize the reason why. He glanced down quickly to confirm his suspicions and sure enough Magnus' boxers had tented substantially. Alec deviously smirked up at Magnus, as if he had some sort of a secret that he had to keep hidden, and in a rush of movements he pulled Magnus down beside him on the bed, and sat up a bit to straddle Magnus' knees. He danced his fingers along the waistband of Magnus' boxers and delighted in the fact that it made Magnus shiver considerably. Alec leaned down to capture Magnus' earlobe between his teeth and started sucking and nibbling on the sensitive skin and in response Magnus let out a low moan.

"Your turn."

A/N: I know short chapter, I'm sorry! I've been busy this week with summer school, and I was asked to write a sort of essay on James Carstairs' and William Herondale's friendship for Cassandra C. because she's posting this huge thing for comparing the relationships in The Infernal Devices on her tumblr—so I've been busy with that! And I've been writing a lot more for 'Pillars of Sand' (which is poorly neglected by me and needs attention!) Okay now about this chapter, I'll admit it was a bit awkward writing this, but I got through it just fine (at least I think I did? You tell me!) This is obviously just the first stage of the things they will get into, a little tiny bit of smut (unless you guys think that, that wasn't a tiny amount :P). But yeah, I should have the next chapter up soon! It will take a few chapters (I don't know how many yet) until we get to the big plot of Jem's cabin! So stick along for the ride :)

Review pretty please? All of your reviews last chapter touched my heart insanely, not that I like to make people cry... But it was just so rewarding to know that I can instill that much emotion through my writing. So thank you so so much!

Amber,