Sooo...I wanted to talk about a few things.
One, this is the last chapter before the end of the story! Now I know I spoke to a few of you who were pitching out ideas to me for the thirtieth chapter. And I know I promised you memory loss, but Ive changed my mind. For two reasons; Im no good at writting ..like..hospital scenes? Like if you noticed I have a tendency to write to the point where my character gets hurt, then page break it, and pick up again after my character wakes up from a coma/being unconsious. Two, I dont even know how Im gunna do memory loss. Like, I dont think I can fit a whole period of memory loss into one tiny chapter..like..im sorry, but its just not gunna happen. So I have something really good planned for the next chapter, I promise you'll all love it, nobody submit it to me I thought of it myself, but its really good and I actually plan to start writting it, immediatly after I post this chapter, and plan to have it out in a few days.
Second, I know I've mentioned a few times about starting my newest story, "Waiting On the World to Change". And I was really iffy about it because school is starting in two weeks Im just nervous about starting my junior year and whether or not Im gunna have enough time to keep up with all my fanfiction material..and Im talking way too much..and I was just really iffy about it also because I dont have it fully outlined and yeah.. So here's what Im doing. You all know my suspense story "Ninteen Minutes" that I started in like February, and never finished? Yeah, well Im taking that down, editing it alittle, and then posting the first two chapters, now edited, back up. Then Im gunna continue that story right after I end this story, since I already have it fully outlined, and plan to have it finished somewhere around mid-October.
Last, Im totally deleting my twitter and starting a new one. Lol. So I plan to have that up soon, then you can all follow me, hopefully sometime soon.
I just broke the record for the longest AN evar! Now lets move on to this really crappy next chapter becuz I lost my outline, therefore had nothing planned for this chapter, therefore had to pull an idea out of my ass..
Chapter 29 *takes place at age 16
He was done. Done.
He couldnt take it anymore. He was shaking. He was in pain. He was done. Done. This was the final line, the final blow. He couldnt take it anymore and this was the line that crossed him. He was about to explode. he was done. Done. It was over. He couldnt take it. Anguish was one thing, this was another. He was done. Done.
His mind was on the verge of exploding. He was on the verge of breaking down. And noone was there to save him. Thoughts racing through his mind, he reached for his hair and pulled vigorously. He was done. Done.
The teenager absent mindedly chewed on his bottom lip, bitting so hard he felt it split. But he didnt care. He was done. Done. It wasnt this paper cut that annoyed him. Infact, the truth was that he just wished he would continue to bleed and bleed untill there was no more blood left and he'd be gone. So that way he wouldnt have to deal with the ostracizing taunts from his classmates, the anxiety attacks and insomnia plauged- nightmare filled sleepless nights and neglect from his father..just everything.
Logically, he knew that wasnt possible. But a boy can dream.
He sits up in bed, wiping tears away as Kendall opens the door.
"Hey, James, Carlos and I are going to head down to the pool for a little while, you wanna come?"
Logan clears his throat. "Uhm, yeah..just go. I have to do something first, but I'll meet you up there in a little bit, okay?"
Unsure, the blonde boy nods in response, and Loganwaits for Kendall to close the door. Then, he stands up. He wasnt going down to the pool. He was done. Done.
Tears rolling down his face, he manuvered past the stuff in his room and made his way toward his desk. He was done. Done.
Shaking hands grappled through his drawers, wishing to retrieve the object. He was done. Done.
A muffled sob escapes him as he finally grabs it and whips it out. He was done. Done.
Pulling the object up closer to his eyes, a sick smile made it's way across his face, grinning from cheek to cheek. He was done. Done.
For a brief second, he thought, Was this wrong? Am I being selfish? No. The world would be a better place without you, he told himself. H was done. Done.
Then he grabbed the object, about to do it. He was done. Done!
Suddenly, he felt three strong arms sweep up from behind him and grab him, embracing him in a tight hug, frantic voices assuring him that everything was going to be okay and that this is not the right choice. And he knew it was not the right choice. Why was he even thinking like that to begin with?
Tears streaming down his face and now pulled into a three way hug, the object slipped out of his hand and hit the ground with a clank. Now he was saved. Saved.
Im thinking about posting this as a regular oneshot, just with a diffrent ending I have planned..
Oh and yeah, I know. In the last few chapters theyve all just been about him being suicidal/depressed/insecure, but hey now you've got a chapter involving all three of them!
Lol. You all should drop a review down there in that box. Love ya guys! :)