[A.N.] Here is the next chapter! Sorry it has taken so long. I have had so much going on for school and for the play that I'm in that I haven't had any time to write! I hope you enjoy it and please forgive me if it's a bit rough. Feedback would be much appreciated! There is an epilogue coming so please hang on tight for the last few yards of this crazy ride! Thank you all so much for your support! As always I do this for you as much as for me and I love you all! Enjoy!

What You Want Most Chapter 10

"Hello, Heero."

Those two simple words rolled off her lips like a silent prayer; maybe it was: a prayer that somehow, someway, something would be resolved. She could hear his soft breathing and felt his presence as if he were standing right beside her. Time seemed to stand still as she waited but for what she wasn't quite sure. After the small eternity of nerve wrecking silence she found herself able to speak.

"I would ask what brings you to my room this late but I feel like the words would be wasted." He was closer now but stayed behind her and she fought debated the wisdom of turning around to face him.

"You know why I'm here."

"I truly cannot say that I do." She finally turned to look at him, bracing herself for the inevitable feelings she always got when her eyes would meet his. Her own eyes widened in shock, however, when she saw the bruise forming on his cheek. Even in the dim lighting of her room she could clearly see where it was beginning to swell. She knew he was human, knew he did get injured but to actually see it was somewhat of a shock. Her mind flew to their earlier encounter in front of the fountain at the wedding shower. She had smacked him. Stepping forward slowly she reached out to him. "Your face… I didn't do that, did I?"

"No… it was… someone else."

"You should put some ice on it."

"It's nothing. I'll be fine." She stopped at his words, pausing merely a few feet from him, lowering her hand. His words reminded her of everything that had and had not transpired between them.

"Of course." She took a step back and suddenly found the floor very interesting. She couldn't meet his eyes. She rocked back and forth on her heels like a nervous child. Why was this so hard? "You still haven't told me why you're here." She saw him shift, clearly he felt as awkward as she did. It was as though the two had gone back in time and were two teenage kids about to ask each other to the prom.

"I had to see you."

"At midnight?"

"I knew you'd be up."

"Of course you did." He would too. He knew everything about her, more than her own mother even. Her mother had arrived late to the Shower and had come in just after their little encounter in the garden. Concerned for her daughter, Mrs. Dorlan had done everything in her power to try and help things run smoothly even after the announcement about the end of the engagement had been made. Standing before Heero, the man who had indirectly caused the cancellation, she found herself frozen. "What do you want, Heero?"

"I wanted to make sure you were alright." She sighed and moved to her vanity, as if trying to distract herself. She carefully removed her earrings.

"I see. Then you heard." He gave a faint grunt in affirmation. "It was for the best really. He did what I should have done long ago. We were deceiving ourselves; I was deceiving myself."

"He said you didn't love him." She froze. Heero had spoken with Donovan? When? She turned and her eyes flew once more to the bruise on his cheek.

"Heero, please tell me you didn't go after him?"

"I needed to know why." She suddenly felt herself grow angry; with him for prying and angry with herself for the whole situation.

"It was none of your business! None of this was your business!" She turned from him, her head spinning from the exhaustion she now felt setting in.

"Relena." She felt him then, behind her, his hands on her shoulders.

"Why, Heero? Why?" She wasn't even sure what she was asking. She had so many questions all jumbling in her mind. She felt the tears forming though she refused to let them fall, not now, not in front of him.

"I know you have questions. I don't have answers to all of them. Let's start with the ones I do." He gently turned her to face him and the two walked to the bed. She sat down first and he next to her, although he kept a decent distance. "Ask."

"Why did you leave?"

"I told you. I wanted you to be happy."

"Yes, you did tell me that. What I want to know is how did you think your disappearance would ever help me be happy?"

"I wanted to see if you were happy. I wanted a chance to see if I had done the right thing."

"The right thing?" She stared at him now, unsure what he meant.

"Letting you go."

"What do you mean."

"I wanted to say no." She saw him lower his eyes to the ground, his bangs were now obscuring his face. He had a bit of stubble growing on his chin that made him seem even more mysterious.

"What do you mean?"

"You asked me if you should marry him. I wanted to say no." her mind went back to that night, the night Donovan had given her the ring. She had wanted him to object, more than anything. She realized how stupid she truly had been for ever doing this to them.

"Then why didn't you?"

"I thought he was what you wanted. I didn't want to stand in your way. When you told him yes I couldn't bring myself to stay; to see you with him."

"Heero." She took his hand in hers and reached up to gently touch his face. He turned to look at her, his eyes flashing with something similar to surprise. She smiled sadly. "I thought you knew. All these years I thought you knew me well enough to know how I felt." He stared at her as if trying to take ion what she was saying. This all felt so childish. Here she was, almost thirty and she was having trouble talking to a "boy" about her feelings. She never really got to be that shy teenager. She never got her first prom, never went on her first real teenage date. This was the closest she'd really come to such a juvenile issue and that's exactly how she felt.

"I guess I should have tried harder to show you but I didn't want to scare you away. I wanted you in my life, even if it was as just a friend. I would rather keep my feelings to myself than scare you off." His eyes widened slightly as realization seemed to dawn on him. Taking his change in expression as a warning sign and dropped her hand from his cheek. She tried to let go of hid hand but he held it tight.

"Scare me off?" She looked away, her eyes closing in thought.

"It seems so silly now. I guess never knew how you felt and I didn't want to risk losing you."

"Relena." The way he said her name was so different. He'd never said her name like that before. It was softer, deeper and somehow, more passionate than she'd ever heard before. "I'm sorry." She felt her throat constrict. None of this was making sense.

"There's no need to apologize. I understand." She stood then, walking across the room to her balcony doors.

"No, you don't." He rose and was behind her inches away. She could feel the heat from his body, almost hearing his heartbeat, or maybe that was her own.

"Heero… what do you want from me?"

"You." She turned to him then, shock in her eyes. He took her hands gently and leaned forward, touching his forehead to hers and she closed her eyes. She held her breath, afraid that if she breathed, if she opened her eyes, this moment would be over, that he would be gone. "Just you." She started giggling in spite of herself. "What's so funny?"

"Us." She pulled back and looks into his eyes, smiling. "Oh, Heero, what a mess we made."

"I suppose we have."

"Well what should we do about it?" She asked, her eyes meeting his as he gave her a sly smile.

"I can think of one thing." She smiled and wrapped her arms around his neck as his lips met hers in a gentle kiss. For the first time in months she felt complete. He was here, with her, holding her in his arms; her best friend, the man she loved more than anyone or anything in the world and as their kiss deepened she knew one thing for certain: she would never let him go again.

"Don't you ever walk out of my life again, Yuy."

"Not even if you asked me to." He kissed her again and for the first time in what seemed like an eternity, she let go, releasing her tension and cares and just let herself get lost in the moment.