Here you go, it's the bomb you've all been waiting for. Yes, this chapter was emotional, but I hope you like it. Let me know what you think and remember, if you feel like there's something you want to happen, just let me know in a review and I'll see what I can do. :) xx
Chapter Six
The next morning I wake early to find that Finnick has snuck out already. I pull on a pretty green top that matches my eyes and black pants before heading out to breakfast. In the living room I spot a figure sitting curled up in a ball on the window ledge. I walk over and realise to my surprise it's not Finnick but Chris, watching the sun rise. I sit down opposite.
There are no bird singing like at home. Just the sound of buzzing streets, despite the early hour. Without even turning his head he says, "Strange isn't it. Not to hear the birds and the other wildlife that comes with it. Not to smell the salty sea air or the stench of fish on every item of clothing you have. I miss that," he sighs.
"Well I can't say the quiet allows me to sleep in more, but I guess after living my whole life there I've become accustomed to it, and sleeping without it has become impossible, even when there's no chance of sleep with it either," I smile.
"Can't sleep?" he asks.
"No. Doubt we're not the only ones. They all have homes too," I say guiltily. They all have homes that they want to return to. And I want to win. In order for me to do so they have to die. Even the twelve-year-old who, up until now, I haven't allowed myself to think about. She didn't have a Grandfather who died for her, who basically throw himself in front of the bullet for her. Not a sister who could volunteer. I even have the advantage of my mentors being families and my District mate being my best friend. It may not seem like luck but it is. Because they'll all be doing their best to save me because they love me. And I can hold on to that. She can't.
"It's true, but theirs aren't half so relaxed," he sighs.
"Relaxed?" I laugh. Relaxed is not a word I'd use to describe my district. Beautiful yes, relatively closely knitted yes, but relaxed no. If you think District 4 is relaxed then your clearly forgetting the all the peacekeepers, and the hunger and the pain theses past uprisings have bought.
"Yes. Annie you may not believe it but we have one of the most relaxed Districts of all. Okay so we have to fish, to earn a living and keep them alive, but they give us weekends where we can sail to our hearts content. Trust me, life in four is a million times easier."
"How would you know?"
"Because I've talked to them," he says, looking at me for the first time. "I know I shouldn't have. Tributes should leave other tributes alone, unless they're going to team up with the Careers, but I couldn't help it. Curiosity got the better of me. Do you know how hard they have it? Honestly the stories I've heard. Whippings in eleven, shooting in three, accidents mineing in twelve. It's awful. They starve, they die, they fall ill, they're punished. They turn to crime to survive. And their children rarely return. That's if they're not career districts like 1, 2 and 4. Seriously Annie, if you weren't my district partner I might actually consider protecting one of them instead, just because I feel sorry for them."
"Why did you find out?" I ask, stunned by his speech.
"Because I wanted to know the world I was going to be leaving. More than just the sunny skies of home but the truth and reality of life for others. Promise me that when you win you'll feel empathy towards them."
"Don't give up on yourself. You may think that I'm going to win, but if I die I want you to win. For Dekklan, for your dad, for Finnick, and for me. You have to win. Promise me that," I say huffily. He shouldn't be excepting defeat already.
"I promise to do what I know you would have though right. Got it?"
I roll my eyes but I'm satisfied. Then I grab some snacks from the table and begin munching. "Beginning your morning binge already are you?" Chris smirks.
"Shut up. You're not being particularly careful either you know," I say.
"No but I don't end up throwing it all back up again do I? So there," he grins. I take one of the crunchy things I'm eating - I have no idea what they are but they're delicious - and throw it at him. This kind of backfires when he catches it in his mouth, grinning even wider than before, but I'm satisfied that he got my point.
We don't talk again until Stan spears from his chambers, mainly because I am mulling over the idea of whippings and Chris because he is remembering his family back home. I wonder what he said to them the last time he saw them. Had he already made up his mind there and then to protect me or was this all an afterthought? My pondering is interrupted when Stan steps between us. "It's going to be a very productive day today. Training with the games makers. Don't let me down boys and girls," he says so chirpily its sickly.
"No pressure," grunts Chris quietly. I am suddenly left wondering if his confident, happy-go-luck attitude is just an act, that deep down he's scared, unhappy, and maybe even full of hatred. I go and fill two plates but movement catches my eye to I change it to three. Then I walk back to the window sill and hand the plates to Finnick and Chris. "Who's the super full one for?" Finnick asked innocently. I see Chris raise an eyebrow and grin smugly.
"For you," I say quickly, handing Finnick the plate.
"Well I can't eat this much so maybe you could take some off my plate maybe?" he says cheekily.
"I'll do my best," I nod as sincerely as possible. Chris snorts. I give him an innocent look. "What's that Chris?"
He's laughing so hard now that he's gasping for breath. The sight of him is making Finnick laugh, and I have to bite my tongue to restrain myself. "If you'd like some too you can have some. I wouldn't want to seem greasy," I say, which makes him laugh so hard his food tips up into his lap. Finally I give in and laugh too. Finnick clutches his stomach and Chris is actually crying.
It's not so much what was said as oppose to what Chris did that Finnick and I are laughing at but Grandma seems to find the whole thing entertaining. She brings a napkin over for Chris, her plate in hand. Stan walks past and exclaims in horror. "Dogs. You all eat like dogs."
Finnick scoops up the sloppiest and messiest substance on his plate with his hands, shovelling it in and then smiling at Stan, pushing the food through his teeth. Chris immediately stands laughing again, Grandma chuckles and I have to laugh to, in admiration for Finnick and just at Chris in general. Stan pulls a face and leaves the room, muttering something about dogs under his breath.
Once I've begun eating my perky mood dissolves. I eat it all again, having not learned from before, and am soon excusing myself to throw up again in my chambers. No-one follows this time. They know what's coming and they know I'll be okay, so why stop eating their food or risk giving the capital suspicion.
I re-join them later after ringing my mouth out about seventy times. "Feeling better now?" Grandma asks gently. I'm not. Finnick holds out a plate with a simple crab cake on it, just like the ones we have at home. "I gave the chef the recipe and they made it. Not rich, not delicious, just the usual stuff you're used to," she says gently, sitting me at the table. I dig in and realise for the first time how much I miss District 4 food. It's less salty and not as good as the food from home but I like it all same. I order another. "Are you sure about this?" Grandma asks.
I nod. "Last one."
After breakfast I get dressed into the same clothes as before, the ones every tribute wears to the training. I take deep breaths. Out in the main living room I wait and not long after Chris arrives, closely followed by Finnick and Grandma. "Annie, use a bow, use a spear, start a fire, whatever you feel like. Chris, play around with a sword but show you can do other things too. Most of all, both of you stay calm," Finnick says in such a business like way that I can hardly contain my laughter. "This is serious Annie," he snaps and I realise now that maybe as mentor he's trying harder to keep me alive than any other tribute before, before we've even entered the games. "Oh no, Annie, they've already began," his eyes seem to tell me, and I guess they have. After all, I wouldn't put it past the Capital to rig the games because of what they've seen in the training.
"We'll try our best solider," Chris says, saluting Finnick, who scowls. Trust Chris to take the blame for me, or to distract Finnick from a lecture. I straighten my back, hold my head high and become as serious as possible. "Better," Finnick says, seeming to relax a little. "As for you, I'm trusting you to keep her under control," he says poignantly to Chris.
Then we leave and make our way down to the training centre. All the tributes are lined up, with the boy from 1 first and the girl from 12 last. Being the girl from District 4 I'll be going eighth. Chris is before me. When his name is called he gives me a hug before entering. "Good luck," I call after him. I sit waiting for about fifteen minutes, and then my name is called over the flat-toned speaker and I'm in. "Annie - Crest-a".
I am pushed by two peacekeepers through the doors. Inside everything is set out as usual, only this time the room is empty of tributes. I am almost shocked at how different it feels, more eerie than before. Then I remind myself I have fifteen minutes to prove to them I'm worth it. "Annie Cresta, District 4," I announce. A man with a strange beard nods, so I head over to the weaponry station. I select the lightest looking spear I can and raise it. I shoot at the dummy and hit it right in the chest. I see one or two game makers nodding in approval, but others aren't so easily impressed. No doubt they've seen it all before. So pushing the lever I make the dummies move. Picking up the bow and arrow I shoot three down and then spear them until their light goes out to indicate they're dead.
I glance up at the balcony. They're smiling now, some even jotting down notes. That's got to be a good sign right? I decide against lighting a fire, as Marla may have already made one and mine would look weak, so I decide instead to set a snare. It's quite impressive if I do say so myself. Then the gong sounds.
I leave and am greeted by Chris. As we make our way to the elevator he asks, "How'd it go?"
"Fine, nothing to rave about. I'll get a five or something. You?" I ask, pressing the button for the elevator to take us to our floor.
"You know. Used the sword, demonstrated edible insects, that kind of thing," he says vaguely. Either it went really well and he doesn't want to make me feel bad, or it went really badly and he doesn't want me to worry.
On our floor we sit and wait. There's not much else to do. In the end we watch back to reaping to pass the time and to evaluate our opposition. Overall I get the impression that District 1 and 2 are very eager to kill. District 3 just get up as if nothing's happened, not happy, not sad, just neutral. I work out for the first time they must be brother and sister, and I realise that this experience isn't just hard for me. I know how they feel, and if anything I'd like to be allies with them, because they know how it feel, but Finnick says only ally with people you don't like otherwise it hurts too much to let you win. That's how his last lot of tributes died.
When it gets to us, I want to fast forward. I might cry otherwise. But I guess Chris wants to see his brother and fathers faces again. So I let him. My name is called and I walk up to stage. I don't look happy but I don't look like I'm about to cry so that's got to be good. I catch a glimpse of myself glancing over at Finnick where he stands at the corner of the stage, but clearly the audience thinks I'm looking at my Grandma, as the camera's zoom in on her face. Distraught, that's how she looks. Like she could break down at any moment. I look into my lap. This is what I've done by being picked. I look over to where Grandma sits. She smiles sadly at me. Then I look back. Dekklan's name is called. As he makes his way to stage, I make out a gulp. Then Chris volunteers and Stan's face lights up. They show my reaction. Horror, pain, welling up. It doesn't look like I'm scared of him. More that I'm terrified of entering the games. You don't have to be a genius to guess that we know each other. We shake hands and Chris even kisses my cheek. I smile sadly at him and the commentator says "If I didn't know better you'd think there's chemistry there." Then it shows District 5 and Chris leaves the room in silence. I wipe a tear away. At the end I turn over to the recap of the Tribute Parade. The commentators have a lot to say about Chris and I.
"Ah, District 4. Our Victors Granddaughter and our volunteer. What are these two because they're not related are they Claudius?" the voice of Caesar Flickerman says over the top.
"I don't know because let's face it, the reaping was very emotional for them both. And when you see them here, look, they're holding hands. Do you think..?"
"I do. I defiantly think there's something going on here. Love, friendship, whatever it is they're sure to tell us soon. I can't wait until the interviews when we finally get a chance to find out about them."
I frown. They all seem so sure that we're together. Chemistry, love... we're just friends right? Well at least no-one seems to have guessed about Finnick and me yet.
Finally the scores come up. Chris re-joins us, with Finnick sneaking in quietly. On an 'errand' again I expect.
District 1 and 2 get tens and nines as expected. Both of 3 get sixes, which surprises me a little, but I am not worried yet. Then Chris's name comes up, along with a photo of him. I glance at him. He look a little nervous. "And now Christiaan Rif from District 4. He scored..." Caesar says, pausing for a moment. "A nine."
Stan claps happily, and I try to smile at Chris but he avoids my eye. Finnick pats him on the back and Grandma give him a thumbs up, but overall no-one wants to celebrate yet.
"Next is Annie Cresta, District 4, with a score of..." The silence is the longest I've ever heard. Almost. The reaping was a million times worst, but this is still bad. Four, I'll get a four... "Eight. Good high scores there for District 4."
I look up, startled. Eight? How did I get an eight? Chris smiles triumphantly, while Finnick stares stunned. "What did you do?"
"Who cares what she did, they both have excellent scores that will go down brilliantly with the Careers. We must celebrate," Stan says, clapping his hands so that the Avoxes bring over some Champaign. They toast and I take a glass too. After all, this isn't just any old day, we are celebrating. Finnick frowns at me, but when Chris whispers "lighten up," Finnick pulls him roughly aside and hisses something so shocking that it makes Chris choke on his drink. I ignore it, since whatever they said is obviously about me. But something stops me from drinking the Champaign. Instead I go and sit at the table with everyone else, Chris and Finnick joining us very soon afterwards. Stan takes head of the table, with Chris next to me, Finnick opposite and Grandma on the other side. We're all in a jolly mood, but somehow Chris seems false and Finnick is always watching me closely. We eat out meal, me being very careful of my choices and size, which seems to please Finnick a little, but not much. Chris drinks his Champaign and then asks Finnick something. Finnick begins to tell everyone, which has all of our attention. Then I hear a glass smash and glancing around I see that Chris has knocked my Champaign over. I stand up quickly, trying to stop the liquid to spill over me. Chris begins mopping up, with Stan rushing to find an Avox. Out of the corner of my eye I see Finnick whisper something in Grandma's ear. Whatever it is, it's defiantly about me again, because she glances from me to the Champaign to me again, and then nods.
The Avoxes quickly tidy up, sitting me down with a new glass of Champaign. I don't drink any yet. The conversation begins again and i soon forget about the whole incident. They're about to bring out dessert when I see that my glass is once again empty. Chris must have drunk mine too.
After dinner I head to my room, claiming I have a headache, but not before I've taken another Champaign. Something about how everyone is acting has made me determined to drink it. As I suspected about ten minutes after Finnick sneaks in. "What the hell?"
I stand up. "What do you mean?"
"You know what I mean. Since when were you a drinker?"
"Since today. Since when were you in charge of me?" I ask.
"Since today so it seems. Anything you'd like to tell me?"
I shake my head and pick up the Champaign.
"Are you sure about that?" he asks, turning me to face him and staring into my eyes, his face so solemn I want to laugh.
"Yes," I say, taking a sip. He frowns and takes the Champaign away from me.
"You think I don't know?" he asks. "You think I haven't noticed? I know everything about you, Annie, so why don't you just tell me already?" he asks.
"Tell you what?" I ask, my smile fading as I take back my wine and raise it to drink from it.
"Don't play dumb with me," he scowls as he snatches away the wine again. "Don't you know anything? You're not supposed to drink when you're pregnant."
The mouthful of wine comes spraying out all over his shirt. I stand there, mouth gaping. "What!?"
"It's not safe to drink while you're pregnant. Surely you know that Annie?"
"I'm not pregnant," I stutter.
"Don't lie to me. I've noticed. I'm not dumb. All the throwing up, the mood swings, not to mention the bump that's beginning to appear. I cradle you every night, I've felt it," he says loudly.
I sit down on the bed, in a daze. I'm not pregnant. I'm not. But he is right; I have been doing a lot of throwing up. And I do change moods very easily. I place my hand gently on my stomach, just below the hips and sure enough a small bump is forming. I let out a sob.
Finnick kneels down in front of me. "Come on Annie. When where you going to tell me?" he asks more softly now.
"When I found out," I sob.
"Wait... so you mean you really didn't know?" he asks.
I shake my head and the tears flow like a waterfall. "Oh Annie," he whispers, pulling me in for a hug. "I'm sorry. I really thought you knew..." he begins, but his voice dies out and I'm left sobbing into his shoulder.
"What. Are. We. Going. To. Do?" I ask between sobs.
"We're going to make you win. You'll both be coming home to me," he says determinedly.
I'm about to protest, about to remind him that his best friend is my fellow tribute, that he can't save us both when I realize that he means the baby. Me and the baby. I feel like I'm drowning in guilt that he's given up on Chris but then he pulls me in for a long loving kiss that stops me short, that makes me feel like he truly loves me with all his heart. Then we lie down together in silence, both our hands on my stomach and both our hearts breaking.