Chapter 24: The Stages of Grieving

Fuuko stood next to Raiha in the elevator, feeling rather awkward having her arm linked through his. They hardly did that, even when they were together. Fuuko could only remember only two occasions when they had done so.

She sneaked glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. Dressed in dark jeans and a dress shirt with a blazer, he looked great. Ugh. It was hard trying to move on from heartbreak when your ex-boyfriend was drop-dead gorgeous.

"Why so quiet?" He asked, smiling.

"Nothing." Fuuko shook her head. "Just thinking..."

"About?"

"How long it's been... since we last... "

"Went out on a date?" Raiha finished for her. "It has been too long. But hopefully, that'll change."

'He sounds so sure...' Fuuko thought.

They stepped out onto the ground floor. Raiha led the way past the seafood and the Italian restaurants, going instead to the French bistro.

"Ah! good evening, Mr. Lino. Table for two?" the maitre'd greeted them.

"Yes." Raiha nodded. "On the balcony, if there's one available."

"But of course, sir." The man picked up a couple of menus and led the way inside.

Fuuko took a good look around as they walked in. It was easy to see why Raiha had avoided the seafood and Italian restaurants. The French bistro had a much more intimate ambiance, with private booths and secluded spots. Even the lighting was a bit on the soft side, since most of the tables were lit with large aromatic candles.

On the balcony, a grand view awaited them. Lights from the city below the mountain were scattered in different pinpricks of color, lending a spectacular feel to the evening.

"It's beautiful." Fuuko stopped to stare.

"I'm glad you think so." Raiha smiled.

The maitre'd pulled out Fuuko's chair for her and bowed her into it. He then handed a menu to each of them, raised his finger to summon a waiter, and bowed once more before returning to his post.

"Good evening sir, ma'am." The waiter greeted them. "How would you like to start off your meal tonight?"

Fuuko opened her menu and scanned the choices. Thank goodness for the fact that her mother was a chef, or she never would have known what on earth these dishes were.

"What would you like, Fuuko?" Raiha looked at her over the top of his own menu. "Please, order anything you want."

"Alright. I'd like the lobster bisque." Fuuko told the waiter.

"Yes, ma'am. And for your main course?"

Fuuko flipped her menu over to the list of entree's. Wow. There was a lot to choose from, and all of them sounded delicious. She sighed inwardly. If this was a dinner with the rest of Team Hokage, no one would care how much she ate. And her appetite was as huge as Recca's and Domon's. Apparently, she was going to have to curb that tonight and act more ladylike.

She ran her finger down the page.

"Four-cheese risotto, please."

The waiter nodded and listed it down on his order pad. "And for you, sir?"

"French Onion soup for starters, and the quarter cut prime rib as the main course."

"Very good, sir. May I bring you anything from the bar?"

"Champagne. The Luxe Vine 1892."

The waiter smiled and nodded. He repeated their orders before he left to fetch their drinks.

"Impressive." Fuuko commented.

"What is?" Raiha asked.

"Champagne. The Luxe Vine 1892." Fuuko intoned in an outstanding imitation of his voice.

Raiha laughed. "It's one of my favorites. I hope you'll like it too."

"Only one way to find out." Fuuko replied, as the waiter returned with two champagne flutes and a bottle of the said wine.

Back up at the boys' suite, everybody was busy, either helping to cook dinner or setting the table.

Domon even lent his muscles and took over kneading the dough they were using to make pizza bread.

Sakoshita looked up from where she was stirring the pot roast.

"Tanya-chan? Would you be a dear and hand me the pepper?"

"Sure." Tanya reached up into the shelf of condiments and handed over the small pepper shaker.

She stuck her nose into the pot and inhaled. "Smells great!"

"Thanks, honey." the healer poured in a teaspoon of ground pepper. "Right. That should do it."

She lifted the stirrer to her lips and had a taste of the pot roast.

"Hmm... still needs a little something." She spooned up a bit more and let Tanya try it. "What do you think?"

Tanya swallowed and looked thoughtful. "I only tried cooking pot roast once, and that was with my Mom. Hmmm..." she wandered off to the fridge, opened it, and came back with a fruit.

"A lemon?" Yanagi raised her eyebrows.

Tanya's smile lit up her silvery eyes. "As Mom always said, if you want to add a bit of spark to a dish, use a fruit."

Yanagi watched as the younger Mikagami sliced up the fruit and squeezed out the juice. She poured a teaspoon of it into the pot roast and had a taste.

"Hmm. A bit more." Tanya added another teaspoon and stirred it in some more. She had another taste and her eyes lit up. She handed the stirrer back to the healer.

Sakoshita tried it for herself and nearly dropped the pepper shaker.

"Mmmm! And I mean MMMMMM!" She gave the little firestarter a hug. "That's what I call delightfully tangy!"

"Recca?" Tokiya straightened up from where he was setting placemats.

"Oh, so you're talking to me now? Thought you were mad at me." Recca grinned as he came over with a stack of plates.

"I was mad. But not at you." Tokiya helped his friend with the place settings.

"At whom, then?"

"At myself. Because everything you said was right. I should've spoken up back at the bowling alley. And that's thrice Raiha's already shown me up today..."

"Back up a second there, Fridge Boy. Thrice?" Recca stopped short.

"Yeah." Tokiya told him about the chance meeting at the elevator, and seeing Fuuko before she was picked up for their dinner date.

"Well, I won't argue with you. I was right. You really don't have a sense of timing." Recca said, breezily, as he continued to put out the plates.

Tokiya elbowed him in the gut. "They have a history together. No use for me to deny that. She's still not over him."

"Uh huh." Recca snorted. "I kinda thought that with you back in the picture, Raiha would remain history." he reached over for the container of spoons and forks.

"Hey, relationships don't generate out of thin air. Maybe it's too soon."

"It's been a little over three years, Tokiya." Recca almost slammed a fork down next to one of the plates. "Three years of us seeing her go through the motions of moving on. I know you weren't there to see it, but believe me when I say it was unbearable seeing her cry when she thought we didn't notice."

Tokiya didn't look up from where he was arranging another place setting. "He wants her back now."

This time, Recca did slam down the fork her was holding. He crossed the table and grabbed the Ensui master by the front of the shirt.

"He wasn't the right guy for her before. What makes you think he's the right one for her now?"Recca disgustedly tightened his grip. "I can't believe this. You're giving up even before you take a chance!"

"I want her to be happy." Tokiya pried his friend's hold off his shirt. "And if she consents for them to be together again, I won't get in the way. I don't want to make her choose between me and the man she obviously still has feelings for."

"Stop acting like such a martyr!" Recca began banging down a fork on every place setting Tokiya had arranged. "If you want her, you'll fight for her. No second thoughts about it."

'I don't 'want' her, sea monkey. I LOVE HER.' Tokiya thought, as he relieved Recca of the silverware."I can't, Recca. Not till I know she wants me too."

'Then you're blind.' Recca refrained from voicing this thought aloud as he savagely tore open a package of paper napkins. 'The day she got over Raiha was the day you came back into our lives.'

The bottle of Luxe Vine sat at the edge of the table. It was half empty now.

Fuuko fought the urge to grab it and down the remaining contents in one swig. The past half-hour had been all about catching up. Of course, Raiha already knew most of what she was going to say, as he kept finishing her sentences for her. Turns out he'd been keeping tabs on her whereabouts, as well as her activities. He knew what year she graduated high school, and that she'd chosen to major in Mathematics at Tokyo University.

Then of course, there was that unavoidable conversation of who they'd dated after their breakup. Fuuko wasn't surprised when Raiha told her that there had been two special ladies that captured his heart, 'but not in the way that you do, Fuuko.'

Of course, her dating record was clean. She didn't have the heart to pursue another relationship, even after the so-called 'grieving process' that Yangai and Ganko, and sometimes, even Recca, Domon, and Kaoru would quote to her from various 'How to Move On From Heartbreak' books:

Denial. Anger. Bargaining. Depression. Acceptance.

She'd experienced 48 hours of the Denial stage before moving on to Anger, which involved trashing her room to pieces, removing every gift Raiha had ever given her and dumping each one into the large garbage bin outside the Kirisawa residence.

Bargaining had gotten her to call his celfone number about fifty times, realizing he wasn't going to pick up.

And Depression? She did the whole enchilada:

Inhaling tubs of ice cream. Crying till her eyes were an awful red. Not leaving her room for three straight days. Refusing meals. Refusing to answer any text messages or take any phone calls...

She had been a wreck. A total miserable wreck.

The day she finally came out of her room was the day Ganko had called in the cavalry. Yanagi, Recca, Domon, Kaoru, and even Kagerou had all taken turns pleading with her from outside her door. Their pleadings had turned into threats of busting the door down and dragging her downstairs.

In the end, she finally agreed to come out and have something proper to eat. She couldn't help but smile at the expressions of relief on her teammates' faces as they watched her polish off a bowl of dumplings and rice.

Her mother had been worried about too. She overheard her expressing a tearful and heartfelt thanks to her friends for finally getting her to come out of her room.

After that, it had been all about giving herself some love. She went back to team madogou trainings and get-togethers, got her grades back on track, and grew out her hair.

She had to admit, pampering herself did help ease the pain. The day it was totally erased though came years after, when she bumped into a certain silver-haired Eskimo and his little sister at the park near her new apartment.

Fuuko smiled to herself and ate another spoonful of her risotto. On that day, she felt she had already reached Acceptance.

But this 'date' right here made her want to add another stage to the grieving process.

Confusion.

Raiha had been nothing short of gentlemanly during the course of their meal. Except for the part where she learned he was keeping tabs on her. That was severely creepy. And with him finishing all her sentences, she could barely get a word in edgewise throughout the conversation.

He changed a lot over the past few years they had been apart, and not just physically. He was more domineering now. He liked being in control, and from his stories of all the business deals he handled for Kurei's company, what he wanted, he usually got.

Some women usually found that alluring. The whole 'macho' image with the wealth that came with the package. It gave some semblance of stability that gave the illusion of a good relationship.

'An illusion he's probably only too aware of.' Fuuko let out a breath and downed the small amount of champagne left in her flute before blinking a few times in reaction to its rather bitter aftertaste.

"More?" Raiha picked up the bottle and offered to pour for her.

"Sure." Fuuko pushed her flute closer to him.

"How do you like the taste?"

"It takes some getting used to." Fuuko admitted, licking her lips.

"You've changed so much." Raiha leaned back in his chair and smiled. "The old Fuuko would have ordered half the menu and said no to anything less than hard liquor."

Fuuko raised her eyebrows. "If I remember correctly, I embarrassed you at plenty of restaurants for doing that."

"When did I- I never-"

Fuuko laughed. "You seem to have very selective memory."

Raiha leaned forward. "What do you mean?"

"Whenever you would take me out to eat, you would always tell me to order whatever I wanted, and when I did, you'd always wonder out loud why I would eat like a boorish man and still stay fit. Then when we finished eating, you were always in a hurry to leave because you'd notice everyone was staring at us. I really embarrassed you with my big appetite, didn't I?"

Fuuko took a long breath after blurting all that out. She had been bottling up that sentiment for years, written in different versions on her diary. It felt so liberating to finally say it out loud.

Raiha's jaw was scraping the table. "I- Well, you-"

"Not to mention that you'd always tell me how to dress." Fuuko reached over to steady his hand on the wine bottle "Which led me to assume that you thought I didn't know what the words 'formal attire' meant."

He still couldn't formulate a complete sentence, which Fuuko took as an opportunity to lay all her cards out on the table.

"It's okay to admit that Kurei wasn't the only reason why you broke up with me." she took the bottle from his hand and poured for both of them. "I think you thought I was too immature for someone like you. And I probably was."

Raiha dropped his gaze for a long moment. He made to reach for his champagne flute, but sighed instead.

"It pains me to hear that you think of me that way, Fuuko."

"Because it's true?" Fuuko asked in a teasing voice. "Come on. It's all in the past now. We've both moved on. It's okay to talk about it."

He shook his head. "You've thought of me that way these past two years?"

"Yeah. When I wasn't busy trying to forget you."

"Now that hurts." He lifted an eyebrow and leaned closer. "I never forgot you."

"Really?" Fuuko snorted. "You're this rich, successful businessman now. I find it hard to believe you haven't found anyone at all."

"How do you know I was actually looking?" he smirked.

"Because you're you, Raiha." Fuuko leaned forward to meet his gaze. "If there's one thing I haven't forgotten, it's how easily you pushed me away."

"Looks like I'm going to have to change that impression I made on you." he clasped her hand.

"What do you mean?"

He grinned. "Come with me."

Up at the boys' suite, the Hokage Gang were digging in to a scrumptious dinner of their own. The pot roast had turned out terrific, the pizza bread was nothing short of delicious, and the mounds of mashed potatoes had a scintillating aroma that would make an anorexic rethink her diet.

Shame that the silence around the table had a certain, should we say, atmosphere...

Only the clink of spoons and forks were heard, along with the subtle sounds of chewing. Occasionally, someone would reach for his or her glass to take a drink.

Finally, Recca slammed his hand down, causing the dishes to rattle.

"Recca!" Kagerou frowned at her son, her hand steadying one of the serving platters.

"I can't take this, Mom!" the flame ninja balled his hands into fists. "Fuuko's out with that -"

"Who she goes out with is her choice." his mother admonished him firmly.

"Am I the only one who thinks it's a bad idea?" Recca threw down his napkin and stormed from the table.

"Please excuse me." Sakoshita apologized and stood up to go after her boyfriend and protector.

Tokiya watched as the healer barely got into Recca and Domon's shared room before the ninja slammed the door. He shut his eyes and willed himself to swallow his food.

"Is that why you've all been so quiet?" Shigeo raised an eyebrow to survey them all. "It's about Fuuko going out with that ex of hers?"

Not one of the kids could look him in the eye. They all tried to focus instead on what seemed to be a temper tantrum going on in Recca's room as he seemed to be yelling colorfully over Sakoshita's attempts to soothe him.

They finished their meal in silence, mumbling their offers to help with the dishes and put away the leftovers back in the girls' suite.

"I suggest you all go to sleep. It's been quite a day." Kagerou told them all gently. "And I'd better go help Yanagi-san with that son of mine."

The teen Hokage members all began bidding each other quiet goodnights.

Tanya wrapped her arms around her brother in what she hoped was a comforting hug.

"Will you be okay?" she asked him.

"Mmm? Yeah. I'll be fine."

'He's lying.' Tanya thought, gripping his arms for a brief moment before letting go and following Kagerou and Ganko back to the girls' suite. It seemed like it worked both ways. Tokiya could tell when she was lying, and she could tell when he was lying. Must be a sibling thing.