I woke up in a place I had never seen before. I looked around for anything familiar, but all I could see was miles and miles of nothing. I reached out and I felt oddly alone, so I said a prayer. This place wasn't anything, not cold, hot, night or day; it was expanse pure and simple.
"Father in Heaven, hear my plea. Hear the plea of your daughter and have mercy on me, for I am a sinner, and unworthy of your Love." I started out all my prayers this way, but I stopped suddenly, because my words thundered through the expanse as though my thoughts were hooked up to a loud speaker. Warmth and love, and peace engulfed me, it was overwhelming to the point I fell to my knees, with my eyes tight shut. I was afraid, but I was aware. Suddenly all of my life was flashing in bits and pieces through the expanse around me. Shame filled me up to the point I thought I might sink through the filmy ground beneath me. Then I realized, I had been forgiven, and all of it didn't matter. I didn't deserve Heaven, but I was saved from Hell by the Mercy and Love of my Savior. Finally I heard a soft little voice; at least I think it was a voice. I opened my eyes and there in the distance were two doors.
"Look," I heard, "I set before you life, choose."
I walked towards them, and soon realized they were quite some distance apart. I would have to choose which one I went to first. One door was made from a rich yellow pine. Carved into the wood were thick pine trees full of birds, mountains and snow. It reminded me of Montana, Bran, and my grandfather's house. It was further from me, and was moving farther away each second. I didn't have time to look at the other door, which was suddenly right in front of me and very bright. I knew I had to choose, so I ducked around it and broke out into a full on sprint after the yellow pine door. It was way farther away than it was a moment earlier, and I could see it getting smaller in the distance. The maybe voice was back, urging me to run faster, letting me know if I didn't, I would never get home.
I was heartbroken, because it was growing farther and farther away, faster than I could take myself. I wanted to throw myself down and cry but realized I didn't matter.
"Choose" the voice said again, but with urgency I hadn't heard before. I had to get there, and pushed myself to run harder.
"Then help me!" I shouted. As I did, I felt such power come to my call that my legs were able to move faster than ever before. The door slowed, as if it knew I wanted to enter through it. I couldn't slow down fast enough however; when I came upon it I simply crashed right through, causing the wood to splinter and crack. On the other side of it was a steep staircase which instead of tumbling down, I ran down, on all four paws. I took enough time to notice they were a grey color, but pressed on down the stairs.
"Hurry, you will have to jump!" the voice urged.
At the bottom was a great canyon, one which I leapt over with no trouble. I couldn't believe I had done so because the expanse was perhaps twelve feet or more. I had to keep going though, if I didn't, it would be too late. On the other side of the expanse, was a woman, one that beckoned to me. I ran to her, and when I was almost upon her, she rose up from the ground a brilliant Blue Jay. I paused and looked at her, because she was the largest blue jay I had ever seen, and then again nothing here was anything I had seen before. I heard the maybe voice again.
"Will you bring him peace?" she asked me. Of course I would, how I knew she was talking about Bran would be a topic for another time. I could see the consequences of my failure, flashing before my eyes. Was she sending this to me? It made no difference; it is not by my strength I do anything, but by His alone. I latched onto the confidence that surety brought me, when a bright, warm light flashed all around me. The light wrapped around me warm and comforting, when I felt things start to move and twist. Great pain ran through my body, and it felt as though I was being torn apart and reshaped. I gasped for air, and finally it came to me.
"Da! "the rest was not English. I looked around and found I was wrapped in a blanket on a bed in a room that I didn't recognize. I was covered in drying blood and could smell fur, leather and snow? I looked over to see Samuel with a huge dorky grin plastered on his face, staring down at me as though heaven itself were peering through my eyes. Did he smell like that? The door flew open then, so hard that it stuck into the wall. That was interesting to me, and I looked to see who might have done that. There before me, in all his splendor was Bran. He had a look of desperation on his face, and disbelief. I felt my face grow soft, because he hurt so.
"Bran, come here." I barley recognized my own voice. In an instant the blanket was being torn away from me, hands searching for the cuts and bruises I knew should have been there. I looked down too, and saw that I was totally undressed, save for my undergarments, again. His hands lingered on the scares from the IED explosion, but soon grabbed me possessively.
"Bran," I said tentatively, because his face was nearly joyous, "I'm naked, confused, and in a room I have never seen before. Everything is really smelly and your son is still in this room, even though I am naked, and you are grabbing me. That's something I hoped for you to do privately. Also I stink so badly. Why do I stink?" I sounded just a little cranky with the last statement.
"Because you need a shower; do not ever scare me like that again, ever!" He said with a touch of humor and a lot of seriousness that made me laugh a little. He leaned into my neck and took a deep breath. "Mine." He declared, his eyes changing from the warm hazel to a pale gold. Hearing him talk like that made my stomach clench in anticipation, and a sweet musky smell filled the room.
"Ok," Samuel said, and bent down "I'll be back in a few hours to check on you. Da, no strenuous activity for her, not that you will listen to me anyways," he muttered. He forced the door out of the wall, and shut it. There was very large hole where the knob had lodged itself. I whistled in appreciation, and grinned down at Bran, who was currently pressed up to my chest, listening to my heart beat. His eyes were closed, and I could feel him breathing more and more slowly. I just took a deep breath, and waited for him to truly calm down. I wasn't in a hurry if he wasn't. Besides, it was long run to get here.