Author's Note: I'm sorry to have put this chapter up so soon, but, I promise, there won't be another chapter for at least a few days. Thanks for reading! Please review (and many, many thanks to everyone who already does review.) Enjoy!

Major Note: Someone dies in this chapter. For those sensitive to blood, skip this chapter.

Chapter 19

Will kept his promise to Sophie. For the next two months, he spent his days either in the weapons room, or up in Charlie's room, folding baby clothes preparing for Charlie's arrival. He spent every night with Sophie, holding her closely, the way her husband would have. Sophie was advised to stay in bed for the duration of the pregnancy, so Will gave her whatever she wanted. He doted on her as if she was his wife.

During the day, Tessa and Jessamine sat with Sophie, playing board games, reading, or just plain gossiping. If Tessa and Jessamine weren't available, Sophie studied books and learned all she could about the mundane world. When Will drug his weary body to bed every night, Sophie was always prepared to tell him an odd fact about some far reaching part of the world. He found himself looking forward to their evening ritual spent talking about the world.

Magnus came to the Institute often. Something had changed between them, not for good or bad, but for the sake of change. They still touched each other and desired one another's bodies; however, Will was too tired to want to be with Magnus in an intimate manner. Magnus stopped expecting or even attempting anything. Instead, they would find lonely, dark corners of the Institute, passionately kiss, and end up with their bodies curled together as they occasionally kissed and didn't say a word. Magnus was just there, at Will's side, as he promised to be.

Augustine became a constant at the Institute as well. He often helped Will in the weapons room, where they talked for hours. Augustine answered every question Will had about children, or found someone that might know the answer. They began training together and found one another to be a formidable opponent. Will's body felt alive and in fighting trim for the first time in nearly 8 months.

In Sophie's ninth month, Will was sitting in the weapons room polishing his father's dagger when Tessa came in.

"Sophie was wondering if you could have lunch with her," Tessa said. "She wants to talk to you." Will nodded and swiped a cloth down the blade of the dagger. Finally pleased with the perfect shine to the blade, he lay the dagger down. Tessa walked over and put her arm around Will's shoulder as she looked down at it. She recognized the dagger as the one Will had held to his chest on the awful night he and Tessa had found common ground.

"It belonged to my father," Will said. "Charlie should learn to fight with it, but it seems wrong to have him fight with a Herondale dagger. Jem was buried with a Carstairs dagger… I don't know how to raise him. When should I tell him about his father?"

"You'll know when he's ready," Tessa said. Will couldn't imagine telling Charlie everything about his father. It would be hard to explain how their souls felt twined together, and even harder to explain how losing Jem made Will feel like his soul was ripped in half. That was all beyond a child's understanding.

Tessa kneaded her fingers into the back of Will's neck, over the muscles that grew tense with every worrisome thought. Will closed his eyes and moaned, leaning back against Tessa's hand.

"Magnus sent word. He's coming over tonight. Charlotte's beside herself because he's bringing French chocolates," Tessa said. Magnus had left the day before on a business trip. Will became used to this, as Magnus found a reason to leave nearly every week.

"Right. He went to Paris," Will said. Magnus's former lover lived in Paris. It was no wonder why Magnus would have gone there. Will hadn't truly been with Magnus in nearly six weeks. Sooner or later, Magnus would go looking for what Will wouldn't give him.

"He loves you, Will. He made a vow to you," Tessa said. She took Will's hand and lifted it to show him the filthy gold ring he never took off. "Whatever awful thoughts you have in your mind, get rid of them. He loves you."

"I wouldn't blame him for cheating," Will said. "I would he glad he did."

"He loves you. He would never cheat on you," Tessa said. "You're just tired and hungry. Go on upstairs. I'll bring up a tray of sandwiches." Will looked back down at the dagger. "Go on, now!"

Will climbed the steps slowly. Winter still kept its icy grip on London despite it being a week into April. 1879 would go down in history as the most brutally cold winter London had since 1740.*

The Silent Brothers estimated that Sophie was close to her due date, which meant she could have Charlie any day, however, she hadn't yet felt any pains or contractions to indicate she was about to give birth. Charlie had spent the last two months doubling his weight and taking cheap shots at Sophie's bladder and spine every chance he got. Sophie swore she was pregnant with a Herondale and not a Carstairs for how much inner turmoil Charlie caused her on a daily basis.

Sophie was reading when Will opened the door and walked inside. He helped arrange a tray on Sophie's lap, and then sat beside her. There was little to talk about. They had spent the last two months talking about everything and nothing at the same time. Tessa brought their food and left the room without saying a word.

"I bet you want to know how I got pregnant," Sophie said. Will looked up from the watercress sandwich he was prepared to take a bite of and closed his mouth.

"You were both virgins," Will said. "I thought he would have been with a girl who wasn't a virgin, who was just with him for sex. I didn't think he would ever be with someone he loved."

"Jem and I loved each other at different times. When he loved me, I had eyes for Thomas. When I loved Jem, he had eyes for you and Tessa," Sophie said. "We were together by chance. The night you went to see the play with Magnus, Jem came to my room. He told me…he would love me forever, even if he died. Do you know what it's like to hear that from someone?" Will nodded. Jem had told him the same thing in so many different ways. "I've waited years to hear that. Forever… that's such a long time, Will!" Will nodded quickly as tears filled his eyes. "We were together that night. It just felt like the right thing to do. So if Charlie ever asks, you tell him his parents loved each other very much. He was conceived with love."

"I promise, I'll let him know," Will said.

That evening, Magnus came over and had dinner with Will. After the meal, before bed, they walked around the Institute. Will was on call that night, with Augustine. They were available to be summoned to help other Shadowhunters who went out demon hunting every night. Should they be called out, Will and Augustine were to meet the Shadowhunters out in London and help them with anything from fighting demons to cleaning up after a messy battle.

Gabriel finished his five day sentence not long after the carriage accident. He and Gideon took over Will and Jem's former demon hunting routine. Five days of solitary confinement had done nothing to improve Gabriel's demeanor. he still treated Will as disrespectfully as before, only now, Will preferred to ignore Gabriel's tantrums. The night before, Gabriel had called Will out of the Institute to show him that another mundane had been murdered. Will then had to report the murder to the Consul, (despite Gabriel being capable of doing just that) who showed up and reopened the Emma Bayliss investigation. Will and Augustine made it back to the Institute by dawn, and Will, unable to sleep for very long, spent the day in the weapons room.

Now, Will yawned, nodded, and tried to pay attention to Magnus's recap of his trip to Paris.

"And how is Sophie?" Magnus finally asked.

"She's having trouble sleeping," Will replied. "There has to be some way to get things going. I wish she would just jump up and down already."

"Jump up and down?" Magnus asked. "It's going to take more than jumping to get the baby out. She might have to push a bit as well." Magnus gave Will a cheeky smile and a shrug. He was being wonderful. Will didn't deserve it.

Will was certain he was neglecting Magnus in some way (Magnus had needs in the same way Will had needs) but didn't have the energy or desire to satisfy those needs. Will couldn't remember what Magnus looked like naked. He couldn't remember feeling remotely attracted to him either. What good was a lover one didn't make love to?

"I'm sorry I've been so busy," Will said. "Everything will slow down when Charlie is born, I promise." Magnus smiled and shook his head.

"You're just getting started," Magnus said. He took Will by the hands and pressed his lips to Will's. Will closed his eyes and kissed back, running his hands down Magnus's sides.

"I don't want to lose you," Will whispered.

"I'm right here," Magnus replied.

They continued walking until they came to a wall with a ladder built into it. Will started up the ladder, with Magnus following. At the top was a trapdoor Will climbed through.

The trapdoor opened into a small room at the very top of the Institute. Three bells hung high above the room, each with a separate bell pull which hung down. Magnus hoisted himself into the room and closed the trapdoor as Will lit a lamp.

"It's a bell tower," Magnus said.

"This is the only part of the church that remained after the fire that took the original structure," Will explained. "The Shadowhunters who built the London Institute chose to keep it here rather than destroy it. They thought if the bell tower survived a fire, it would serve their purposes as well."

"It was strong and persevered through the worst times," Magnus said. Will shrugged. "How did you know this was here?"

"Henry used to send me up to ring the bells. He's not a fan of ladders," Will explained. "I came here more when I was younger."

"Did Jem come up with you?" Magnus asked. Magnus viewed the Institute as the place Will and Jem had lived and loved together. There were memories of them stuck in forgotten corners and private places of the Institute.

"No, I never let him up the ladder. I said it was treacherous to climb and Henry agreed. Jem and I had our places, yes, but this wasn't one of them," Will said. "I wanted to show it to you. That's all."

Magnus nodded and walked over, taking Will by the waist. He kissed Will's cheek and ran his hands up Will's spine. Will stepped away and fiddled with the lamp, which cast a very dim glow. It was nearly out of oil.

"Should we ring the bells?" Magnus asked. Will gazed up to the three heavy bells suspended overhead. He heard them chime more than he wanted to admit.

"The bells are only rung when a Shadowhunter dies, to inform everyone of the death," Will said. "Three chimes, no more, no less." Magnus nodded seriously. "Besides, if we rang the bells, everyone would know where we were." Magnus bit his lip and nodded again. Will closed his eyes, put his hands in Magnus's waist, and kissed him deeply.

Magnus groaned and drew Will's body closer to his. He touched Will gently on the cheeks, holding him close, then dropped his hands to Will's collar. He began hastily unbuttoning the buttons on Will's shirt. Magnus's body felt warm in Will's hands, as if a fire simmered beneath the surface of his skin.

"I just want to touch you. Can I touch you?" Magnus asked. Will nodded quickly, so Magnus finished with Will's shirt and tossed it aside, then reached down to pull Will's undershirt over his head. That shirt landed on the floor as well. Magnus ran his fingers over Will's chest. His thumbs dipped low then moved up, caressing Will's pecs and dancing them over Will's nipples. Magnus's hands were warm on Will's skin as he touched with the perfect amount of pressure. Will stifled a yawn. He could fall asleep being touched like this. "Do you like that?"

Will nodded. He pulled Magnus's shirt free from his pants and rested his hands on Magnus's lower back as they continued to kiss. Magnus reached up and unbuttoned his own shirt, then tossed it to the floor. He moved his hands to Will's waist band. Will stepped aside then, avoiding his touch.

"I just want to kiss a little bit," Will said. "I just want to kiss."

"And I just want to touch you," Magnus said. "I want to see you, and feel you…I want you, Will. I miss your body. I miss wanting you." Will closed his eyes and kissed harder. Magnus kissed back in the same manner, nipping Will's lower lip as he sucked on the sensitive flesh. Will nodded, so Magnus unbuttoned Will's pants and moved a hand inside. He took Will's half stiff cock in his hand and began to stroke as they continued to kiss. Will felt weak in the knees, the way passionately kissing Magnus made him feel. His heart was pounding and his head felt dizzy.

Magnus had stiffened rapidly and was now pressing against Will's leg, still caught within the confines of his trousers. Will released the button on Magnus trousers and unzipped them. He touched Magnus in the manner Magnus was touching him, causing Magnus to moan in anticipation and push himself more into Will's hand. It was arousing, to turn Magnus on in this way.

"I'm so… touchy," Magnus mumbled. "You have no idea what you do to me. I'd like to toss you down on the floor right now if not…" Magnus bit down on Will's lower lip and shoved his hand away. His body started to shake as his eyes flickered shut. Magnus was coming, hard, fast, and suddenly, into his own hand. He kissed Will wildly and misguided, almost as an afterthought.

Will felt as aroused as he had been sitting at the dining room table discussing the weather. Watching Magnus get to enjoy pleasure while he didn't even want it was just the icing on the cake. It wasn't fair.

"I'm sorry," Magnus groaned. "I was hoping we could…"

"It's been a little while," Will said. It had been six weeks, not that Will was counting. He ran a hand through his hair and stepped away as Magnus attempted to compose himself.

"You're worth the wait," Magnus said. "Where were we?" He pushed Will's pants down to his thighs and resumed kissing him. Magnus touched Will in the way that told Will he wanted Will to ask more of him. Magnus loved to please Will, and nothing would please them both more than if Magnus got down on his knees for Will. Will briefly stiffened at the thought of it. He had his doubts as to do producing much of anything. "Relax." Magnus whispered the word nicely. It thinly veiled a question Magnus didn't want to ask.

"I'm trying," Will mumbled.

"What's the matter?" Magnus asked. He pulled his hand away. "You're barely hard. Do you even want me?"

"No, I guess I don't," Will snapped. He shoved Magnus away, pulled his pants up, and bent over to retrieve his shirt. "I'm not interested. I have a lot on my mind. I'm not..." Magnus folded his arms and looked Will in the eyes. Will could have looked away, went downstairs, and forgot any of this happened. Magnus was satisfied. That was all that mattered.

"Will," Magnus said, softly. Will's eyes filled with tears. He looked down at the floor.

"I haven't given you anything in weeks," Will said. "I'm going to be a father any day now. You're going to take second, no, third, to Charlie and Sophie. I just don't get why we're still together."

"I love you. That's why we're still together. Don't ask again," Magnus said. "I swore to you I would be at your side until you died. Anyway. Anyhow. Do you think one rough patch is going to scare me away? So we haven't fooled around in a little while. I'm not leaving you over something as frivolous as sex. There's time for it. There's time for everything, Will." He reached up and flicked a tear from Will's cheek. "I'm here for the duration."

"You're going to lose me to a baby. Doesn't that bother you?" Will asked.

"You have to do what you have to do. Charlie isn't going to scare me away. I'm here," Magnus said. "Besides, don't you think I like the idea of my lover being a father? I'm going to see you be all sweet and loving to a defenseless baby. You're going to be a great father, and it just makes me love you more."

"I'm such a mess," Will said. "I don't want to be a mess."

"You'll always be a mess," Magnus said. "Sometimes you just contain it better." Will shook his head and smiled. "Let's go downstairs. You can allow yourself one drink. Then we'll sit in the Library and talk. Or we'll go to bed and I'll stay the night."

"I want you so bad," Will said. "I just can't…" He didn't have the energy to do more go downstairs and do what Magnus suggested.

"You'll have me whenever you're ready," Magnus said. He took Will's face in his hands in the way Will hated to admit that he loved. Magnus kissed him gently, first on the forehead and then on the lips. "I'm right here."

They went downstairs and went to Will's room. Will had a drink as suggested but never made it to the Library. He begged Magnus to spend the night but never found out if he had or not, since he fell asleep with his head in Magnus's lap not long after finishing the drink.

In the middle of the night, Will woke up in Magnus's arms as the door creaked open. Henry stood in the doorway.

"Sophie?" Will mumbled.

"You've been summoned to Hyde Park to assist the Lightwoods," Henry said. "Augustine is already downstairs readying the supplies. You're to leave in five minutes." Henry closed the door.

Will lay his head back on Magnus's chest and listened to his heart beat thumping steadily. Magnus ran his hands through Will's hair, then pushed him away. Will climbed from the bed and went to dress as Magnus drew the blankets tighter around his body.

"Be safe," Magnus mumbled.

"I'll be right back," Will said. He kissed Magnus on the cheek, and dressed in the darkness. Just knowing Magnus was tucked into his bed made Will never want to leave.

"I love you," Magnus whispered.

"I love you to," Will said. He walked out and hurried downstairs.

The heavy scent of fresh dirt and rain was in the air as Will and Augustine walked to Hyde Park. The night was still dark, with no hope of sunrise for another few hours. There wasn't much to talk about, so they walked side by side in silence. Upon entering the park, Will spotted Gabriel beneath a large oak tree in the south east corner of the park.

"What's he doing?" Augustine asked. Will squinted and saw that rather than fighting demons, Gabriel was sitting on the ground, completely still. Augustine took a breath and drew his weapon. Will did the same. The closer they got, more Will's stomach twisted. Gabriel should have been standing up. He should have heard Will and Augustine approach and he should have acknowledged them. Something was very, very wrong.

"Gabriel?" Will called out. Augustine put a hand out and shook his head, then lowered his weapon and approached slowly.

Gabriel sat beneath the tree. His knees pulled to his chest and a chunk of witch light gleamed brightly between his fingers. He was breathing hard and muffling the noise of it by holding his other hand over his mouth. Gabriel's eyes stared at the ground before him, filled with unshed tears and unspeakable fear.

Augustine turned to Will, then stepped beneath the tree with Will still behind him. He took his own witch light stone and lit it dimly, as not to frighten Gabriel. Augustine lifted a hand to his own mouth and gagged.

Weapons were strewn beneath the tree. The grass was covered with an inky blank substance that appeared to have splashed onto Gabriel as well. He was sitting close to the tree trunk. Gabriel bit the knuckles on his right hand and continued to stare at the ground. The witch light shifted in his hand and became brighter, causing the blackness surrounding Gabriel to turn red.

"By the Angel," Will whispered. His stomach clenched tightly. He breathed through his nose, trying to settle his stomach, pulled out his witch light, and lit it.

Gabriel flinched and put his hand up to block the light. His palm was stained with blood and he shivered profusely. More blood, already drying, covered his face, arms, and legs.

"Gideon," Augustine said. he put a hand over his own mouth as he took several deep breathes.

Will looked down on the ground. He saw a white shirt stained red and armor that was covered with more, still wet blood. Will wanted to think about how hard it would be to clean all the blood off that piece of armor. He wanted to think about the broken weapons strewn about that would need fixed. He didn't want to think about Gideon Lightwood laying flat on his back, eyes wide open, dead.

"Gabriel, are you hurt?" Will asked. He knelt beside Gabriel as Augustine walked closer. "Gabriel?" Gabriel stared down at Gideon. His eyes darted back and forth the same way Jem's used to, when he woke from a dream and couldn't differentiate from reality and dream. "You have to talk to me, Gabriel." Gabriel shook his head and painfully moaned.

Augustine knelt beside Gideon and looked him over. Gideon's eyes were wide open, staring into the tree above them. His neck was ripped open, as if a vicious dog grabbed him by the throat and tore the skin, muscle, and veins away. Will turned his attention back to Gabriel and tried to get the two darting green irises to focus on him.

"Gabriel. Listen to me," Will said. "Are you hurt?"

"I happened so fast," Gabriel whispered. "He was here and then he wasn't. I didn't get to say goodbye. I didn't think I had to." Augustine reached down, and closed Gideon's eyes, and mumbled a prayer. Ave Atque Vale. Hail, and farewell. "I couldn't carry him. I called you instead. I thought… you could help me."

Blood dripped from the stone Gabriel still clutched in his hand. Will reached over and gently took Gabriel's hand, pulling it away from Gabriel's knees. There was a jagged wound down the inside of Gabriel's arm that dripped fresh blood.

"I'm going to heal you now," Will said. He brought out his stele and drew a healing rune on Gabriel's arm. "Are you hurt anywhere else?" Gabriel licked his lips and looked down at Gideon.

After Jem died, Will sat in Hyde park, not far from where he was now, and held Jem's body in his arms. Even when it began to rain, even when the sun came up, Will held Jem, because some small part of him believed Jem was going to come back. Will spent his entire life in London waiting for Jem to die, yet was unable to comprehend it when it finally happened. It seemed so improbable. Jem had been a constant in Will's life. Gideon had been the same to Gabriel. Now, Gideon was gone and Gabriel was covered in his blood.

"He's not really gone, is he?" Gabriel asked. "He can't really be dead. He was right here… a second ago." Augustine looked form Gideon to Gabriel and back again, but Will understood. He moved closer to Gabriel and put an arm around his shoulders as Gabriel stared, unblinking, at his brother's body. Augustine sat on the other side of Gabriel and laced his fingers into Gabriel's left hand.

"He's gone, Gabriel," Will whispered. "Gideon died."

Gabriel nodded as the truth slowly sunk in. Will remembered the moment when he realized Jem wasn't coming back. Something had left his body then; something he had yet to recover. Then Will picked up Jem's body and carried him home, sobbing the whole way.

Now, Gabriel would take the same walk. His body was responding to the trauma it had seen, and soon, the wound Gabriel hadn't yet acknowledged would open. Everything would come flooding out. Gabriel would bleed to death in his own way.

"He can't really be gone," Gabriel said. He shook his head. "You're lying to me, Herondale." Will and Augustine were silent. "Please. I'll do anything. Just tell me he's not really dead. He can't be dead. He's getting married next month. He's getting a fancy job in Idris. He's not… really…"

"He's gone," Will said. "Gideon died, Gabriel." Gabriel shook his head.

"Well, then, which one of us is going to tell my mother?" Gabriel asked. "She's going to need to know. My father to. He…Oh… Oh, no! NO!" Gabriel's eyes filled with tears as a horrible, cruel, realization finally dawned on him. "YOU'RE LYING TO ME! TELL ME THE TRUTH!"

"I am," Will said. Gabriel took a shuddering breath that didn't fill his lungs. Will knew how grief felt. Now, he would see what it looked like.

Gabriel fell into Will's arms and Will pulled him tightly against his chest. Gabriel screamed and cried hysterically, clawing at Will and struggling to get away, but Will would not let Gabriel go. He had held Jem this way in so many of his blind and furious fits. Soon, Gabriel would calm down. Soon, he would stop crying. He had to. This awful time couldn't last forever.

Will understood now what Augustine had said about the moment one becomes an adult. Before, Will wouldn't have cared that Gabriel had lost someone precious to him. He wouldn't have held Gabriel this tightly and comforted him this way and cared this much. Now, something horrible had happened. Will couldn't face the situation as a petty child who only wanted to see Gabriel suffer, not when he had suffered for the same reason. And so it was then, on a cold April night, that Will finally understood what it meant to be an adult.

"It's going to be alright," Will whispered. Gabriel sobbed against Will's neck as hot tears ran down Will's back. He felt Gabriel's soul crack in half in the most perfect way, so that it would never go back to the way it was before.

The sky was beginning to lighten when Gabriel finally began to calm down. He lay down on the ground, curled into a ball, and pulled Will and Augustine down beside them. They lay in silence as Gabriel sobbed.

"So this is how it feels, to lose your brother," Gabriel said. "Now I know how it feels. Now, I know."

Will didn't cry until much later, when he sat in his bathroom and watched as Magnus scrubbed the blood out from beneath his nails. The bell tolled high above them. The Lightwood family had been summoned and told of Gideon's death. Now, the rest of the Shadowhunters in London would know. Will allowed himself to break down then, and cry for the bond he and Gabriel would forever share.

* This is a true, actual fact.

Author's Note: Thanks for reading! The next chapter will be the last... sorry! Please review?