Tic...

Toc...

Tic toc... It was driving Mickey around the bend. It was as if time wanted to remind him that it was running out. He couldn't talk to his dad about what was happening, if he even thought that Mickey had been fucked since Svetlana first fucked him then they'd both be dead. Mandy was making it perfectly clear she didn't want to get involved, so much so that she had left to finally speak to Lip about her own personal problems. He couldn't stand to speak to Svetlana, but other than her that left Ian. Gallagher, the person he knew could make it better, but he still resisted. If only he could speak to him, make him see sense.

Tic toc... Gallagher always wore the trousers in their friendship. He always wanted more, that was one thing that Mickey couldn't give. Sure for the first time in his life he actually had someone to hang out with, someone to share life stories with... But that was all. There was never going to be a conversation, there was never going to be a partner. That's what he convinced himself of, what his dad convinced him about. Perfect role model.

Tic toc... Why wouldn't that fucking clock stop! If time stopped for just one night, he could work everything out, he could work out what he wanted, needed. Four years? Could Mickey last that long alone? There was never any guarantee that they would even be friends in a month, why should he stop Gallagher going? He wasn't alone, he had plenty of people to talk to. Mickey pulled out his phone and looked down his list of contacts, he had never noticed that he only had 21. 3 of them were Gallagher - Home, work and play.

.

"You're nothing but a warm mouth to me."

.

Ring... Ian didn't need to look at his phone to know who it would be. He knew Mickey would eventually want to work in an angle. It wasn't the first time that Ian felt like this. When Frank Gallagher had first caught them, Mickey had run off to Juvie, Monica had tried to help Ian to enlist to the army then. It didn't work, she had no subtlety; Ian had learnt that mistake. This time all the cards were on the plate, Mickey knew how he felt and didn't feel the same. Simple.

Ring... Should he even bother picking up the phone to check? Right now, did he want to speak to anyone? Would hearing Lips voice or Carls stupid questions make it easier to abandon them? No matter who it was it was going to be hard. There and then he made the decision that he owed them all one last conversation. Just as he made the decision, his phone rang out. He wouldn't have the courage to speak to them all, one person would get that privilege He found it strange that he was so ready to walk into a desert and be shot at, but didn't have enough bravery to just answer his phone.

Ring... Before he knew it, he automatically called back Mickey. Before he knew it, he was listening to something that made his gut wrench. Crying, well close, sobbing. Those first 3 minutes of almost silence brought Ian back to his senses, but it didn't mean he had anything more to say; Mickey would have to make the first move.

"Don't... Just don't do it." Mickeys voice was trembling, Ian had never heard that before. "What do you want from me? What do I need to do?"

"I don't need anything from you. I don't want anything from you. It's taken me this long to see it, but you just don't care." Ian paused, just enough to give Mickey time to respond, "You've never cared, for fuck sake you got married, you are married."

"That don't matter, it's just a piece of paper." Mickey defensively replied.

After another moment, Ian said his farewell, "You asked me what I wanted, needed; right fucking there. I told you that all I've needed was for you to give a fuck about me, and all you can do is change the subject. Don't bother calling, cause this phone's gonna get smashed..."

All Mickey could hear was a loud bang, and then the line went dead. The warmth left his body, like walking into the shadows.