Hello dear readers. I'm such a dork. Yeah… disclaimer?

DISCLAIMER: I am female, teenage dork, so how could I possibly be the middle aged man who writes Maximum Ride and controls the rights to the characters lives and deaths? If I am a female, teenage dork, not only could I not be a middle aged man, but I also could not be a teenage male 'boy band icon' if you will. Therefore, I do not own Who I am by Nick Jonas (and the administration)

Nudge's POV

"I hate this!" I scream, throwing my hairbrush across the room. It strikes a mirror and I wince as broken glass falls to the ground. Normally I would be all superstitions, but what's 7 years of bad luck compared to 7 more days of life? "I hate my life!" First, I figured out that my parents wanted the old Nudge. The 'Monique' they lost. Not the winged Nudge they got. That's why I'm back with Gazzy and Angel. I flew out here the minute my mom found the expiration date on my neck. Then, to top that, Max, Fang and Iggy are gone. I'm left in charge.

Nothing makes sense, nothing makes sense anymore
Nothing is right, nothing is right when your gone.
I want someone to love me
For who I am
I want someone to need me
Is that so bad?
I want to break all the madness
But it's all I have
I want someone to love me
For who I am

But why, I wonder, couldn't I have been a normal teenager? A normal teenager without wings and the freedom to live past 15! Sure, some teens die at 15, but do they know that they're about to expire? No! I feel a presence in my head and sigh; Angel. "Nudge," she says calmly, "unlock your door. We can talk about this." Does anyone else find it wrong that Angel has to lecture me? "I'm not going to lecture you," she insists, "I just… I don't want you to end up like Fang." A low sound in my throat startles me. I'm snarling. I never snarl! I reply coldly, "I can't end up like Fang." Rage fills my voice as I continue, "Fang had Max. Fang loved Max. He needed Max. Who do I need? Who do I love?" I realize this is wrong, and my voice falters a little, "You know I didn't mean that last part. Angel?" "I know." Such a simple reply ripples through the madness that is my life. I've driven my only true sense of family, love, and security away. I'm ungrateful and insane. That's who I am.

Nothing makes sense, nothing makes sense anymore
Nothing is right, nothing is right when you're gone
I'm losing my breath, I'm losing my right to be wrong
I'm frightened to, I'm frightened that I won't be strong

The following days drag on. Angel keeps a slight distance from me. I shy away from Gazzy, who's fallen silent. I can't risk hurting someone else now, can I? I know I'm wrong for staying away from him, but what in this world is right? I'm breathing my last breaths, my sense of right vs. wrong. I'm losing it all. I'm afraid of death, I'm afraid that I'm not being a strong enough leader. WWMD? Max isn't here though, is she?

I want someone to love me
For who I am
I want someone to need me
Is that so bad?
I wanna break all the madness
But it's all I have
I want someone to love me
For who I am

As the hours pass, I lie awake thinking that maybe I wasn't meant to be loved. Max had Fang. Ella had Iggy. Who do I have? I would like to think that I have The Gasman, but I continue to shy away from him. In all of this madness, there's still the fact that I'm going to expire.

I'm shaking it off, I'm shaking off all of the pain.
Breaking my heart, breaking my heart once again

No. I have to stay strong. If not for Max, Fang, or Iggy, but then for Gazzy and Angel. I need to show The Gasman the right ways to lead before I go. He'll be taking care of Angel; the baby and his biological sister. So I just have to shake it off. Shake off the stress and the sands of time that are diminishing as we speak.

I want someone to love me
For who I am
I want someone to need me
Is that so bad?
I wanna break all the madness
But it's all I have
I want someone to love me
For who I am

From that day on, I spend time with The Gasman and Angel. They have both watched the older 3 expire and I'll be next. That can't be good for their mental health. Not to mention the fact that I haven't fully been there for them since Iggy left. I love these two. I need these two. This madness is all I have, and it's my life. It's who I am.


I want someone to love me
For who I am
I want someone to need me
Is that so bad?
I wanna break all the madness
But it's all I have
I want someone to love me
For who I am

On the 7th night, I sneak to the kitchen. I grab a can of coke and sit down at the table. I can feel the life being drained out of me; I don't think I'm going to last the whole night through. So I'm leaving them a letter. A letter saying all of the things that I've neglected to say out loud and in person. First I right one for Angel, then for Gazzy. Halfway through his letter, the Gasman shuffles to the table. He's 12, he's just a kid. His hair falls in frizzy curls all around his face. I smile meekly, and he not only returns the smile, but also takes my hand in his. "Nudge, I need you. I love you. There is no possible way to make you stay, but I wanted to tell you. I love you for exactly who you are." He leans forward and kisses me softly. This is all so sudden; this show of emotion. I want to savor it. But sadly, my time is up.

Yeah, who I am.

I can't breathe, and Gazzy jerks away. Fear shows clearly on my face, but that's the least of my worries. I'm coughing and grasping for life. I grab both of his hands and tell him that I love him too. That it's my time. I tell him Goodbye, and to tell Angel I love her and goodbye as well. Slowly darkness overtakes me; I hear Gazzy screaming and crying in the background. It's not those words that I remember, but the ones he previously uttered. "I love you for exactly who you are." Those are the last 8 words are all I've ever really needed. Too bad he couldn't say them sooner.

Another tragic love story with death attached. I'm not a really big fan of Nudge and Gazzy as a pairing, but this was still really sad and cute at the same time. The next two of course won't be tragic love and death stories, because Angel and Gazzy are brother and sister…

Review? Next up: The Gasman.

~Faxisthegreatest123~