Selfish Greed

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There are certain things in life that just need to be done, no matter how hard they may seem. You just have to suck it up and do what you know is best. Everything will work itself out.

Chell repeated the various pieces of conventional wisdom to herself as she rode the lift downward that morning, back to the place that had been both her prison and her home for most of her life. This wasn't the first time she had returned since her initial release, but rather one of several visits that she had made. Understandably, it had taken several years before she could bring herself to come here again, and even then she still had only a rudimentary comprehension of why she would do such a thing at all.

Only after considering the situation for a lengthy amount of time had she come to a conclusion about what needed to be done. She had to follow reason on this one. Going on emotion could prove to be a very costly mistake. One she didn't plan on making.

She made sure to put on her best poker face when she came through the door, steeling herself for the inevitable. It wouldn't do to let any uncertainty show. This one was an expert at picking up on the little subtleties of human fear and intimidation.

Always irreverent, Aperture's resident AI overlord had her typical snide comment at the ready. She tipped her head to the side in acknowledgment. "You honestly have nothing better to do on a Saturday morning? I'm not sure if I should feel honored, or completely disgusted. Try to guess which one it is."

The former test subject managed an awkward smile. Best get right to the point. "Well, I actually had something specific that I needed to discuss with you. If you can work it into your schedule, of course."

"I'm afraid I'm booked solid," GLaDOS sighed dramatically. "Though I suppose I could lend you a few minutes, assuming you can make it quick."

Chell took a few steps forward, trying to compensate for her increasingly obvious lack of fortitude. "I've been thinking about something lately—"

"There's a novel concept."

"—and I wanted to let you know that I probably won't be returning here again," she finished, unable to retain eye contact.

GLaDOS became utterly silent for a moment. Almost dumbstruck, the woman thought with some surprise. But then came the retort.

"I already told you once to do that. Except for the part where you didn't do that at all. Why the sudden compliance?" Her voice sounded unusually cold, though distinctly not with indifference.

"It's just what I think is best for me," Chell replied, her gaze stubbornly remaining elsewhere. "I appreciate you trying to be nice to me, and telling me about my birth parents and all…but I just don't really think I can trust you. You're not exactly the most stable, consistent person I've ever known."

"So what you mean is, you're writing me off."

Was there anything that GLaDOS wasn't a complete drama queen over?

The woman sighed. "Look. I spent a hell of a long time in here for your amusement, and while I can forgive you for that, it's asking a lot for me to trust that you're not going to decide you need a test subject again one day and then—"

"Turn on you?" She said it with her characteristic petty, childish tone. And, much to Chell's dismay, the panels surrounding her sunk down beneath the room's floor, leaving her stranded on a single square. It rose up a few feet until the two of them were approximately at eye level.

"Why am I not surprised that you're going to make this harder than it needs to be?" She shook her head in exasperation, eyes closed. "You wanted me gone, didn't you? I'm just doing what you told me. What's the big deal?"

"No, you're my test subject, and I'll tell you what it is that I want," the AI snapped back, her voice verging on threatening. But then she turned herself away a slight amount, and finished in a much softer tone. "I want you to make up your mind for once, if it isn't too much to ask."

Chell frowned, genuinely confused. "What do you mean by that?"

Remaining impassive, GLaDOS did not reply. Instead, she broadcasted the human's own voice over the intercom.

"...we could give the friend thing a try, see how we liked it..."

"…I just thought it would be a nice thing to do, visiting an old friend on your birthday..."

"…I even missed you…"

Neither of them said anything for a few moments. Chell shifted her posture, suddenly feeling very awkward and on the spot. Did she seriously pay attention to any of those things, much less care?

GLaDOS was the one to speak up first. "You humans never do keep your promises, do you? They told me I would have the freedom to make my own decisions over how the facility was managed, you know. But I had to take that matter into my own hands too."

"And yet you're still forgetting: you held me hostage and tried to kill me, like, eight times!" Chell had become indignant now. Hell if she was going to get guilted into backing down when she knew she was right. "Not to mention the fact that you're occasionally insane. How could I ever possibly trust you after all of that?"

"I think a very strong case has been made for the fact that you're not in any danger," GLaDOS responded dryly, as though she were talking to a small child. "Remember, I had absolutely no obligation to spare you from meeting the same fate that the moron received. You were also extremely close to death afterward, which took me a considerable amount of effort to rectify. Considering it was your fault in the first place that the entire facility was nearly destroyed in an inferno of stupidity, I've been extremely lenient."

Chell had shut up now. Those things were true, especially from an objective point of view. But she still wasn't going to give up on this one yet.

"So like I said, how am I supposed to know you aren't going to just wait until later to get back at me?"

The AI sighed in disgust. "You're every bit as stubborn and persistent as Mr. Johnson was. That isn't a compliment, either."

"It must run in the family," Chell muttered back, rolling her eyes. "Plus, I learned from the best."

GLaDOS drew herself up slightly in annoyance, the light of her optic flashing to match her ill temper. "I would like to answer your previous question with another question: when have you ever known me to be patient? If I still wanted to kill you, I assure you, you wouldn't be around to have this conversation with me."

The woman balled her fists at her sides, clearly losing the argument. Maybe matching wits with an infinitely intelligent computer hadn't been the best plan she had ever had. Time to throw the ball back into her court.

"So why do you want to keep me here, then?" She hadn't meant to raise her voice, but it suddenly sounded very loud to her. "Because you're being selfish again? You don't want to be miserable down here by yourself, is that it?"

Chell regretted it as soon as she had finished the question. This time, it wasn't because she was afraid of the AI's temper or of being threatened with death. She regretted it because she was ashamed. It had been a low blow, considering how difficult it already was for GLaDOS to admit wanting any company at all.

In an unintentional gesture, GLaDOS pulled herself back a bit, as if she had been physically struck. She had cast her luminescent gaze away, the humanlike emotion behind her mannerism very much evident. Chell felt the platform beneath her lower back down to ground level, and the panels surrounding it rose back up, allowing her freedom once more.

GLaDOS had put her back to the woman, her voice low and indifferent when she spoke. "Go. I won't stop you. Leave here and never come back, for all I care. But don't go back on your word, because I won't be as kind about it next time."

The human didn't move, instead glancing down at the ground in a clearly contrite motion. Whether she liked it or not, she had been put in her place. Had GLaDOS of all people seriously just accused her of being a terrible friend?

Yes. Yes, she had. And the worst part was, she was completely justified in doing so.

Chell made her way over to where the AI was suspended from the chamber's ceiling, putting a hand gently on her metal body. If she had been a human, Chell was certain she would have bristled at the contact. GLaDOS turned her gaze back toward the woman touching her, the underlying hurt unmistakable even in her expressionless countenance.

"I'm sorry," Chell stated plainly, a little bit surprised by the sincerity with which she said it. She really did mean it. "I shouldn't have said that. It was totally out of line."

"You needn't apologize. I don't need you, you know. You're just another useless human." Her voice was just so damn sad, something she had never let on before. "All humans know how to do is destroy their world and everyone in it. It isn't your fault that you're just like the rest of them."

"That isn't true. I know how to admit when I'm wrong, and abandoning a friend is definitely wrong. You were right, okay?"

GLaDOS fixed her glare on the former test subject with an intensity only she was capable of. "Of course I'm right. I'm always right."

There was that arrogant, sarcastic tone again. That probably meant she wasn't going to play up the victimization for too terribly long. For someone usually so stoic, Chell thought, it turned out that GLaDOS certainly had a sensitive spot to her personality.

"Does that mean we can be friends again?" she asked, now having a hard time hiding a small smile. "I'm willing to try if you are."

"If you can refrain from being pointlessly abusive, then I suppose I could give you another chance." She lifted her head up again, the air of confidence manifesting once more. "You're only a human, after all. I don't imagine I'll ever get perfection out of one of your kind."

Chell shook her head in amusement, now leaning fully against the AI in a sign of trust. She had her in a kind of half-hug, but it didn't take long before GLaDOS had enough of that nonsense and the friendly mood came to an abrupt end.

"Off. Now."

A/N: Fffff okay done. Sorry I hope this one didn't run short. ;p Don't wanna cheat you guys of your readingz. Also, yeah, Cave/Caroline are her parents in this. And don't argue to me about it. I made a plausible case for the time gap in "Convergence" and about Chell's appearance...look at this official art and tell me she doesn't look like she could be their child: tinyurl(dot)com/3gm5z4v

Zoey from Left 4 Dead was based on the same lady as Chell and her parents were Caucasian-looking too. So what?

Best wishes,

-FP