Hello there my little puddle ducks. Sorry for the slight delay in updating my little story.

I would like to dedicate this chapter to Lola, who left a heart breaking review for me, but no way of replying to it. I just want to say thank you for reading my story, and that if you ever want someone to talk to, then i am always here.

Also, this chapter was written to a mix of two songs. What Sarah Said (by Death Cab) and The A Team (Birdy's cover of Ed Sheeran's song). They don't really match the chapter as such, but they were the inspiration for it. If you are able, please have a listen as you read.

Okay, on with the show..

Of Many Things
Chapter Thirty One

'Teresa Lisbon!' The toast passed from the lips of everyone stood in the pub that had become a regular haunt for the members of her team. It seemed like the right place for them all to head after the pain of the day. The team, along with Lisbon's family and a few of her oldest friends were gathered in one side of the bar. The double doors opened up onto the garden and flooded the room with the bright evening light. The owner; Aiden, had come to know the group very well over their years of service at the CBI, and had himself attended the funeral. A shot of tequila to each person seemed the least he could do. Lisbon had always seemed such a beautiful soul to him, and her passing was a great loss to his heart. Aiden had offered his bar as a place for them all to come together. A celebration of life, opposed to the heartbreaking service that had been held that afternoon. Stories would be told. Memories would be shared. A goodbye fitting for a woman who had always shown such an abundance of brightness and life.

Jane found himself seated at a table, not quite reaching the back of the pub, but far enough to go unnoticed for a little while at least. He was content in watching the others gathered at the bar, rather than joining in himself. The stories were too fresh in his mind. They spoke of events that had mere weeks ago happened as if they were long lost memories of a far away life. They weren't even really memories yet. They were Lisbon's life, and he couldn't talk about her like that yet. Like she wasn't there anymore; wasn't a part of their lives. He knew that she was gone, of course he knew that, but it didn't make it any easier. It didn't make the weight of her death weight any less heavily on his heart. But, it was helping the people he cared most for. They needed the light-hearted stories; needed to remember a time when they had been happy. When a great piece of their lives hadn't been missing. So, he would simply sit and watch all that was going on around him. Sink into his abilities to notice a thousand characteristics in a single breath. It was all that he could do to stop himself crumbling into the mass of grief that he feared he would soon be.

Rigsby had his arms wrapped around the slender waist of VanPelt; their love for one another keeping their heads above the great waves of sadness that crashed all around. Grace was animatedly telling a story, of what exactly Jane wasn't sure, to Tommy, Ben, and his wife Gemma. All five were in a fit of laughter, but Jane could see the underlying pain. Their red-rimmed eyes giving them all away.
The scene was mirrored almost exactly in that of Cho, Aiden, James, and Tommy's wife Rebecca, who all sat in one of the side booths of the bar. James spoke of what Jane presumed was a childhood memory; igniting a sorrowful happiness in each of them. Their drinks left untouched on the table as they listened intently to all that was said; clinging onto every word as if they were made of gold.
But it wasn't the adults who Jane was most drawn to, but rather their children instead. The nieces and nephews of Teresa, that each seemed to embody a little of their aunt; making it seem as if she was almost back with them again.
Tommy and Rebecca had three children; two girls and a boy. Lily, whom Jane had often heard stories of from Lisbon, was almost sixteen now. A surprise baby as Teresa had called her. Tommy had feared that they were too young when she was born, but had been nothing but the perfect father for the past sixteen years. A beautiful girl in all ways, and very much like her own mother; striking features, tanned skin and sun kissed hair. And yet his Lisbon's eyes were unmistakable. Forest green and sparkling in the ever disappearing sun. It was as if looking into the very soul of Teresa Lisbon. A beautiful curse on such a young girl. A great sadness was sure to fall on anyone who looked into them on that night; too much a reminder of what was lost. But in time, a loving reminder of an Aunt who had meant the world to her. Jane had spoken to Lily earlier, and had been quite taken by the strength she had shown. She had exclaimed how lovely it was to finally meet him; apparently she had been Lisbon's confidante, and knew almost every inch of their relationship. Tears shot to Lily's haunting eyes as she had recalled the many times her aunt had spoken of the love she had for Jane, and the secret hopes Lisbon had of their future. Lily had promised to tell Jane more of these stories later that evening, being called away by her little sister to play make believe.
Lily's sister, Aida, seemed in every way to be an exact miniature of Lisbon. Her pale skin and dark hair; although very much that of the six year old she was, were all Lisbon. Petite and cute as a button. Jane watched as she and Lilly ran about outside. The happiness and delight of a wonderful childhood evident in them both. Aida's innocence taking away from the devastating sadness that was so clear to see in sister, and yet Jane knew that Lisbon had adored the little girl with all her heart. Like all her nieces and nephews. They were every bit a part of her heart.
Ryan, Tommy's little boy, was just past two years old. Currently snuggled tight against his Mum's chest, fast asleep for some time now. A perfect mix of his Mum and Dad.
Ben and Gemma had one little boy; Henry, who was playing with his cousins in the pub garden. Almost eight and already so obviously a Lisbon. Everything except his deep brown eyes was a reminder of Lisbon.

It was an odd mix of loss and hope that Jane felt whilst watching the family of the woman he loved. Heart wrenching memories of the beautiful little girl who had been stolen from him so many years ago. The life that should have been his. The life that would have taken him so far away from this moment in time. Guilt still shone out like a burning wild fire whenever he thought of his baby, and yet the wonderful memories he had of her were becoming brighter each day. Taking over the pain and bringing him a magical happiness that he had never thought possible.
The overwhelming loss of his dreams also took control of Jane. The children that he had always imagined himself and Lisbon having. The bounding dog and white picket fence too. He knew that under the tough 'senior agent' shell of Lisbon, lay the want to have a family of her own. To give her own children the chances that she never had in life. To love them with all her heart.
Jane's vision was clouded over with un-spilt tears, and his heart felt heavier than it ever had. He was so caught up in his own thoughts that he hadn't noticed the little footsteps that were drawing ever closer to him.
'Mr. Jane, why are you so sad?' Aida had scrambled up onto the chair that was next to Jane's, and was looking up at him with childish curiosity.
Jane couldn't help but smile at the sight of her sat there; everything about the little girl reminded him of the Lisbon he loved so dearly. 'Because i loved your Aunty Tessy very much indeed.' Was his honest reply.
'But, love is a good thing? You shouldn't be sad because of love Mr. Jane.'
'Yes, love is the best thing in the entire world. But i miss not being able to tell your Aunty how much i love her.' Jane wasn't sure how to explain what he was feeling to such a little girl, when in all honestly he wasn't exactly sure himself.
'Daddy says that Aunty Tessy will always know how much we love her, because she can watch us with the angels. They make sure she remembers that we love her.' Aida was smiling up at Jane, wanting to make the man happy. Too many people had been sad since her Aunty had left to live with the angels.
'Your Daddy is right sweetie; the angels make sure that everyone we love will always know how much they mean to us.'
At this Aida clung tightly to Jane's side, tipping her head so she was still able to speak, 'Then you shouldn't be sad, because Aunty Tessy wouldn't want us to be sad. Love makes you happy.'
Jane couldn't help but wrap his own arms around the little girl. Her words might have been simple and childlike, but they were really at the heart of the truth. Love did indeed make you happy. Teresa's love had been the only thing strong enough to save him from himself. To prevent him spiralling into an everlasting darkness. In her love, he had found happiness. It was as simple as that when he really thought about it.
He felt the little girl wriggle about, pulling at his hand as she climbed down from the chair, 'Will you come play with us Mr. Jane? Lily says you know how to do magic. Aunty Tessy told he all about it!' and with that, Jane followed Aida outside. It always amazed him how wonderful children made him feel. Like he was really living. Their innocence and unwavering belief in all that was good, was a breath of fresh air against the horrors that life had sent him. And that is why Patrick Jane spent the remainder of the night putting on a magic show, with the help of Lily, for the children his Lisbon had loved with all her heart. In that instant he forgot about the pain and the sorrow that awaited him, instead allowing himself to enjoy every minute of that night. A night of make believe and true happiness.

Please, let me know what you thought?
I hadn't intended to really write this; it seemed to come about of it's own accord.
I hope however, that you enjoyed it.

I think we are nearly at the last chapter now. If not one, maybe two more updates to go.
Thank you for reading, it honestly means the world to me.

See you all soon :)