Six weeks had passed since the night of the K.V.A's, James wasn't allowed on set to finish filming season 3 untill his face had healed, and I had attempted to ignore my back for a week or more but had to take time off work because the co-codomol tablets I took for the pain made my head spin so much, they knocked me for six.

James and I had hung out a lot in our newly found time off.

Most of it was spent in the trailers on site of the boys show.

Having kendall near by all the time was amazing. We had gone from strength to strength. I was totally besotted with him. We would spend all our free time together practically joined at the hip, or the lips. I was absolutly in love with him.

My pain tablets made my insides churn, I was feeling sick to the stomach, and to make matters worse I only had a few hours left of kendall before he went to the airport to fly to Canada, he would be gone for 5 weeks filming and recording songs with the other boys for the long awaited movie.

I walked back in to James' trailer and resumed my position on the sofa next to him with a duvet surrounding me. carlos and James had finished there filming despite james' 2 week break waiting for his face to heal up, we were just waiting on Logan and kendall to finish.

I watched james play on his xbox. carlos was in his own trailer sleeping.

"Sick again?" He enquired without removing his eyes from the flat screen that Hung on the wall.

"Yeah" I croaked back, pulling James' duvet tighter around my shoulders.

"You need to stop taking those stupid tablets" he advised, eyes still glued to the tv.

"You try having to put up with this pain without it" I snapped back at him.

He paused his game.

"Sorry" he put a friendly arm around my shoulders.

I sighed "no I'm sorry, I'm a cranky Bitch when I'm feeling unwell"

James chuckled at my obvious confession and I snuggled in to his shoulder with my eyes closed taking in his amazing scent.

I awoke to doors being opened and closed,

kendall and Logan stood in the room, I looked up to James face, he was fast asleep with his arm still around me.

I gently moved it and sat up.

"What's that all about" kendall asked pointing at james and I, with attitude in his voice.

"Nothing at all" I shrugged "I wasn't feeling well again" I got out from the duvet.

"Nice!"came his sarcastic reply. Kendall nudged James' foot with his own to wake him up."Oi Casanova its airport time" kendall spoke with slight venom in his voice.

James woke up.

"Ah crap I didn't mean to fall asleep"

James got up and chucked last minute things in to his cases that had been sat ready to go by his trailer door.

Kendall didn't look at me. I was a bit pissed that he had the hump over me being asleep, even if it was on James' shoulder, it was completly innocent. he knew how ill I had been lately, and the fact he was just about to fly out of my life for five weeks and leave on bad terms pissed me off even more.

I stood up and took his hand, said small goodbyes to everyone.

Kendall and I walked out of James' trailer and walked to my car outside the studio.

"I'm gonna miss you baby" I pulled my head in to his chest.

"Gonna miss you too" he said still sounding pissed off.

he opened my car door, I got in and opened the window.

"Kendall I love you"

He kissed me, "I'll call you when I'm there okay" and he tapped my car to give the go ahead to leave.

he walked away before I even started the engine.

Kendall rang late that same night to say he was at the hotel, he sounded distant and pre occupied. He briefly mentioned his hotel being known as haunted but he didn't really talk much more about his trip. He said he was tired and gonna get some sleep.

I felt bad, I didn't like having a stupid rift between us.

If I didn't feel so rough and wasn't so scared of flying I would of boarded the first plane to Canada to be with him.

The next day passed and I waited for a call from kendall that never came. I tried calling him a few times but it just rang out each time.

I hoped he wasn't being worked to hard.

By bed time I had enough of waiting, I phoned Carlos to see what was going on.

"Hey shoo" Carlos answered, he sounded cheery.

"Hey los" I sat with my legs crossed on my bed.

"How you feeling now?" He asked with a concerned tone.

"Same, doctors tomorrow, so hopefully get to the bottom of the pain...listen, can you get kendall to call me. I'm starting to worry". I smoothed my hands over my feet.

"Yeah sure thing, he went out after the studio today, but I'll tell him to call when he gets back, we are doing a ouiji board tomorrow in the hotel, its gonna be good" he laughed hard down the phone at me.

"Okay sounds ...erm fun" I mocked.

Carlos sounded happy enough, if he had picked up from kendall that there was a problem then he would of definitely let me know, Carlos was loyal to me like that.

He said that the filming so far had been hilarious, and wished me luck with my appointment for my back tomorrow.

We said our goodbyes and Hung up.

I wondered where kendall could be in Canada at this time of night on his own and not had the time to answer his phone. He had probably left it in his hotel room.

I settled my self in bed and drifted off to sleep.

I woke up the next day feeling worse, I had never felt so ill, and my back throbbed away to itself.

It was mid morning, I checked my cell, but only had work related messages left for me.

I hoped to god the doctors appointment was gonna get me on my way to better health. It was my birthday in 3 days and I had planned to go out to a top L.A. hot spot to celebrate with my girlfriends seeing as kendall couldn't share it with me.

I showered and dressed, I couldn't face eating anything.

I tried kendalls cell again.

He answered, but he sounded rougher than I did, still in bed half a sleep and judging by his voice Hung over. Again he didnt say much. He sounded very sarcastic towards me. I felt hurt and lost. I told him not to drink in which he replied "whatever" . I Hung up.

How had my kendall turned in to this moody miserable person.

My heart now hurt more than my back.

I grabbed my keys and set off in the car to see my doctor.

I returned home numb.

I didn't even remember much of the journey back to my house .

I put my keys on the lounge side cabinet and sat on my couch with my head in my hands and started to cry.

Pregnant!

thats what the doctors trip had concluded.

Pregnant was what had been wrong with me.

being Pregnant was the cause of my sickness and pregnancy was causing the muscles in my back to fuck up and cause my previouly broken back severe pain.

How the hell was I gonna tell my 21 year old boyfriend he was gonna be a father when he wouldn't even talk to me.

I went to bed and cried myself to sleep.

I woke up the next day, got out of bed and went down stairs, 2 days until my birthday and I wasn't in any mood to celebrate anything so I called my girlfriends to say I had made other plans for my big day and promised we would all go out soon, I couldn't bring myself to say about the baby news, least not before I had told kendall.

He still hadn't tried to call. I got my lap top out and checked Twitter, Carlos had tweeted about the ouiji board antics they had last night, apparently they had run out of the hotel screaming, kendall had been on to declare what song had been recorded and had posted a picture of a double Decker bus promoting the movie. James had posted a picture of him in front of a huge looking castle that was the set location.

If kendall had time to tweet, why the hell hadn't he phoned me.

I bit the bullet and decided to call him, least my news would make him forget about his petty problem of me falling asleep hugging my friend.

I rang the number, it rang then got cut off.

Great so now he was hanging up on me.

I rang it again this time it was switched off.

What the fuck was going on.

The mixture of dread inside me and morning sickness overwhelmed me, I ran to the bathroom to vomit.

The day went by slowly, I spent most of it in front of the tv wrapped in a blanket.

My cell rang and made me jump, it was Carlos. I couldn't speak to him.

He would know something was up with me and wouldn't rest til he had gotten it out of me. I let it ring out.

He left a voice mail asking me to call him back.

I didn't.

I went to bed early hoping tomorrow would bring a better day.

Next morning and kendalls phone still wouldn't answer to me, I sat at my kitchen table and sobbed, Carlos tried to ring again, he sent me a text to say call him.

Just after lunch the door chime rang, it was tammi, Carlos had obviously sent her round to check on me. I let her was shocked at the state of me, I hadn't eaten properly for days and looked gaunt, my eyes were red and puffy from crying, and I was still ill and in more pain with my back as i now couldn't take any pain relief because of the baby.

She was concerned, I didn't really talk much about anything, she also didn't know anything about kendall, Carlos hadn't mentioned him, she just said I needed to call Carlos ASAP.

She wished me better and left.

It had got to the point now that I didn't want to know what was going on, either way it was gonna be bad.

The next morning on my birthday I found out just how bad, the news was full of it.

Pictures of kendall all over some blonde girl in a club in Vancouver.

My hands shook, and my heart ached, I sobbed my heart out in bed for hours.I decided it was time to call Carlos.

"Los?" I croaked on the answered click his end.

"Hey shoo" his voice gentle.

"Is it true?" A sob broke out from my voice.

"Yeah honey... it is...I'm really sorry, I've been trying to call you for days" he spoke urgently now.

I just cried down the phone with my broken sobs.

"Sheriden I'm sorry..." he paused"...but ... I'm pretty sure he has been sleeping with her".

I thought I was going to be sick at hearing those words from Carlos.

"Shoo?" carlos' voice sounded so worried.

I Hung up.

I turned my phone off, I couldn't hear any more. An hour later the door chime rang, I ignored it, the home phone rang almost constantly til I took it off the hook.

The door banged, I could hear tammi trying to talk to me through the door. I sat at the bottom of my stairs and cried until no noise would come out my mouth.

I sat there with my knees in my arms trying to make the hole in my chest close up. hours must of gone by.

The door sounded a gentle rap, I looked at the silhouette through the glass, it wasn't tammi this time, it was a man. Probably some journalist trying to get a good scoop, I ignored it. Then I heard James' voice trying to reason with me to open up.

I did