AN: Hey! So I promise after this chapter everything will pick up. I have an idea on where everything is going, so I may or may not be skipping around a bit. Anyway, here's chapter 10!
Chapter 10
The knock on my door brought me back to reality. I quickly turned over and shut my eyes, praying Spencer would think I was asleep and go back to bed.
My plan failed.
He knocked once again, but this time he slowly turned the door knob and peeked his head into my bedroom. "Jenna?" He whispered faintly. He was met with silence. "Jenna?" He repeated. Again, silence filled the space in between us. I had my eye closed, so I could only assume that he walked in shortly after he spoke. There was a sudden pressure at foot of my bed. I opened my tear filled eyes and looked down to find Spencer hanging his head and fiddling with his hands.
"Hey" I choked out.
"Hey. L-look I'm sorry for acting like I did, and for what I said, it was uncalled for. Hotch called me out on my lack of communication and I took it out on you and it was wrong of me." Spencer seemed sincere, from the tone of his voice to the distress on his face. I wasn't exactly sure how to respond to that, to be honest I wasn't even upset about what he said anymore. I learned a long time ago how to shake off the words of others. I missed my old life, that's what carried the tears.
"I'm sorry too; I may have over reacted a bit." It was true; I had the tendency to take things further than necessary. That was something I had to work on.
"No, you were right to say what you did. I was being selfish" The entire time he spoke, his eyes never left the floor.
"It's fine Spencer, really." I felt guilty making him feel like he was entirely at fault.
"If it's fine then why were you crying?" Spencer then looked me in the eye, which surprised me to say the least.
I turned to my night table and fixed my eyes on a picture of me as at about 18 months old, accompanied by my mother and father. The way the moon lit up my bedroom was just enough to make out the picture.
"I just miss my parents. Nine years without them and it still doesn't hurt any less" Spencer moved up the bed a bit more and reached out his hand to the picture. "Do you mind if I take a look?" "Sure, go ahead." I could see him analyzing the photo carefully, picking apart the contents.
"How old were you when he left?" I spoke up, referring to our father. Spencer seemed rather shocked at the question.
"Eight. I was eight" I could sense the hurt in his body language.
"I was six. Looks like when the going gets tough he takes off."
Spencer let out a slight chuckle of accuracy. "If you don't mind me asking, what happened to your mother?" I found it strange that he didn't already know, I was almost certain it was in my file. I gave a minor sigh; that was a question I wasn't very keen on answering. "After Dad left, she wasn't herself anymore. She was sleeping all day, crying all night. I couldn't sleep one night and wondered into her bedroom to crawl into bed with her, but she wasn't there. I saw the bathroom light was on and the door was cracked, so being the curious child I was, I went to check it out. She had slit her wrists not to long before I found her, but long enough that it was too late." Spencer looked at me with compassion, verging on pity. I don't think he was expecting that exact explanation.
"Oh...I'm sorry to hear that"
I shrugged my shoulders weakly. There was nothing anyone could do to fix it, so that was my general response to anyone who apologized.
"This whole living situation is quite a change, huh?" Spencer giggled. "Agreed. It could be worse though, I could be a rebellious teen in need of a severe attitude adjustment with 20 piercings and you could be a helpless adult with a hoarding problem" We looked at each other for a few seconds then burst out laughing. After we caught our breath, I could feel the tension that had been hovering over us for the past week being lifted. We had finally connected through our sorrow, and had a better sense of who we were as individuals. I must say, it felt pretty great.
"It's late; I should be getting to sleep." Spencer patted my leg under the covers and stood up to leave. "I'm glad we had this talk, Spenc" Spenc, there we go, a nick name. He smiled at me and chuckled as he reached the door. "Me too, Jenna. Sleep well" And he exited the room.
That night had turned from good, to awkward, to angry, to sad, and somehow ended on a positive note. I could feel that things were going to be different from then on, between me and Spencer I mean, and I couldn't wait to see what that entailed.