They are in Orlando. Tony had no idea they were in Orlando until the pilot announced it. He doesn't really care. While there's something about New Orleans that Tony can't put his finger on, and he is somewhat in love with the mystery of it, he doesn't even want to touch Orlando. It's like a less cool New York City with more children, tourists, and mouse ears.

And humidity.

Not thrilling, and not really even that nice.

It turns out to be the weirdest place in the universe. And not because of anything that has do with Orlando specifically.

All though, the fact that the state of Florida can't really afford a police force doesn't hurt.

Tony and Loki are already drunk and giggling when they get off the plane and one of Loki's handlers piles them into a cab toward their hotel.

Absolutely everything is hilarious.

The cab driver looks murderous by the time they are outside the Giancarlo, which has golden pillars and golden doors.

"Welcome to El Dorado." Says Loki as he opens one of the front doors and ushers Tony inside. "No accounting for taste."

Tony disagrees. Shiny is always good. And damn, was the Giancarlo shiny. And gold.

Just throw in some red and it would have been fucking perfect.

Somewhere in the back of his mind Tony registers that people are looking disgusted and offended at the sight of them. He registers a woman covering up her children's eyes and an old man with a pipe full of tobacco muttering 'faggots' under his breath.

The forefront of his mind is occupied by Loki's long-fingered hand grabbing his ass through his silk what-ever-the-hell he's wearing.

"Baby, stop it." He says without meaning it and it occurs to him that he sounds like those girls he used to talk into sleeping with him. He remembers how much it drove him crazy when they played coy and figures its time for a little sweet revenge.

He nearly misses the concierge's horrified expression as he drops a room key into Loki's outstretched palm from nearly three feet away, taking great care not to touch him.

"Thank you, dear." Says Loki with a wink that causes the concierge to physically turn green before dragging Tony away.

In the (gold) elevator Tony finds himself pressed up against a wall.

Loki's teeth are at his throat and his hands are sliding up his shirt and Tony throws his head back and sighs.

"Looooki." He breathes out on a tiny whine as those fingers circle his nipples through his shirt.

"Yes, darling?"

"Shouldn't we...mmm...wait until we get to the room?"

The next thing Tony knows one of those hands is around his rapidly hardening cock and teeth are nipping at his ear.

"You don't feel like you want to wait. In fact, you feel ready right now."

"But Loki-"

"You're already so wet. I could bend you over right now and have you if I wanted, couldn't I?"

Operation Torment Loki isn't quite going how Tony expected. A voice is his head is screaming 'Abort!' but turns to white noise as fingers pinch and pull at his nipples through silk.

"Couldn't I, baby?"

Suddenly Loki isn't touching him anymore and Tony feels like all of the air in the elevator is gone.

"Yes!" He gasps and a bell rings. The elevator stops.

The walk to their room is torture.

Even the limber and dextrous Loki can only walk so fast in heels.

Yezho: He's kind of like some weird combination of Ziggy Stardust and a dominatrix. Idek. I just do what I want man. AND YES. A DAVID BOWIE FAN. LET ME LOVE YOU. DAVID BOWIE IS MY LIFE.

Cheesy: It's just Ziggy Stardust. Look up the song 'Moonage Daydream' specifically. That song is delicious. It also explains everything.

JoJo: THERE WILL BE NO MENTIONS OF GLEE ON THIS FIC. NOPE. NOT TODAY. THE STARS ARE NOT IN ALIGNMENT. CAN'T DO IT.

xD: I can't even predict this honestly. I'm like 9/10 done the first draft of this (the whole fic is about 200 pages long) and I don't even know how it's gonna end man. I just go with it. Most of the fun of writing for me comes from having a story I've never seen before and not knowing how it will go and conclude.

hulky: I am a fan of acid, all though I had the most horrifying trip once. It was like Steven Moffat and Stephen King fucked and had a grotesque plot baby on my life. I went to another place man. It was some fucked up shit. There may actually be one of those chapters coming up. Depends on if it fits, but if I can do that for you I totally will.

Thank you all for reading and reviewing!