Chapter 41

The gathering progressed nicely with everyone visiting and swapping stories. Jet seemed to be feeling more like himself, Zuko noticed—even if he did give him sharp glances occasionally. Zuko wondered if he was trying to tell him something about Eun Min—maybe warning him not to give away her past.

Eun Min did seem indeed a little ill at ease. She cast frequent nervous glances at The Duke, who frequently glanced back. Zuko could tell she wanted to talk to him. But Eun Min stayed close beside Smellerbee, as if afraid to leave her protection. It was sad to see someone so young be so damaged by life. It angered him.

The group wandered outside after dinner to walk around the grounds of the courtyard. Winter was on its way, but the evening was unseasonably pleasant.

Even so, Toph was cold and stepped inside for a shawl. The others paired off into couples and wandered away down the dark treelined paths. If Jet escorted Mai far away from the rest of the group, Zuko didn't think much of it. After all, they were a pretty serious couple at this point.

However, Zuko hoped that Eun Min would relax a little and maybe take a walk with The Duke down a quiet alley, but a tug on his sleeve alerted him that the girl had found him instead.

"I wanted to talk to you a moment," she said hesitantly. She looked around to be sure no one was close enough to overhear them, then looked up at him, her eyes full of worry. "Please, please do not tell anyone where you found me," she begged. "Smellerbee knows, but that's all. I don't want anyone else to find out."

Zuko agreed without hesitation, not letting slip that Toph already knew. Zuko had no worry that she would say anything though. Toph was not the gossiping kind.

"I won't tell anyone," Zuko said quietly. "But no one in this group would judge you harshly. We've all done things we've regretted."

"The only thing I regret is listening to my brother," Eun Min said bitterly. "When my mother died, he promised me a job in the city. I had no idea of the kind of job he meant."

"Your brother got you into that life?" Zuko asked incredulously.

"Yes, Hyun is my older brother," she admitted, shamefaced. They walked down a cool green path for a moment before she continued. "He sold me to Suk Chul to pay off part of a gambling debt to him. I am so ashamed. What if my village found out about the way he's dishonored our family? How I've dishonored our family?"

She stopped and turned to face him, her eyes full of tears. "I can't go home and face my relatives, my friends. I have to stay in the city now. But I don't want anyone else to know about me. I want a new start too. Can you understand why?"

Zuko nodded. He of all people could understand. So he escorted her to a bench on the path and sat with her. "Eun Min, you have not dishonored yourself. And you are not responsible for the actions of your brother. He has brought shame on himself—but his actions can't bring shame onto you. Trust me, my family did more to shame themselves than anybody I know of. But I'm not part of that and neither are you."

She looked at him steadily, but he could tell his words weren't sinking in. "Do you know who I am?" he asked.

She shook her head shyly. So he told her just who she'd been dining with. At first, she was overcome by celebrity. She'd had no idea she was having dinner with the Crown Prince of the Fire Nation and the Avatar. Zuko refrained from telling her Jet was possibly the next King of Omashu—that would have pushed her over the edge and she wouldn't have spoken another word the entire night out of terror.

Finally, she relaxed enough to listen to his story. How his forefathers had tried to conquer the world. How he'd participated in the fall of Ba Sing Se. How he'd come to his senses and joined the Avatar. How his own father had tried to burn down the Earth Kingdom. How his sister had helped him. How they'd been defeated, but how the entire nation had been dragged down with their greed and lust for power.

"But even after all I've done for the past several years to repair the damage done to the world by my ancestors," Zuko admitted, "I still felt like I could never do enough. That just being related to them was curse enough to keep me from ever being able to accept who I was as a firebender, who I was as the Prince. I felt just as criminally responsible for their actions as they were."

"But you aren't responsible," Eun Min said firmly. "You aren't like that. You and Jet treated me with respect when I didn't deserve any. You helped me get away." Her voice was sincere.

Then as a sort of afterthought she added, "And I've heard some good things about how you and your uncle are making things better between the nations." But that wasn't as convincing. Zuko wasn't sure how interested Eun Min really was in politics. He didn't blame her.

But her next statement was just as sincere as her first. "Sir, you can't blame yourself for what they did. That wouldn't be right."

"And neither can you," Zuko replied firmly. "You can't blame yourself for your brother's actions and you can't blame yourself for what you were forced to do. I don't think you were a willing participant."

"Not at first," Eun Min said brokenly. "But they would push me and punish me for not smiling. Safflower would beat me if a customer complained about me. It was so hard to fight back against them."

Zuko felt horrible for her. "Even then, you didn't do anything you weren't forced to do. I respect you, Eun Min. I respect your bravery in helping us and in escaping when you had the chance. And if there's anything you need to get your new life started, just let me know. I've got some experience in starting over myself."

She nodded, then stood up from the bench and gave him a little bow. He stood and gave her a deep bow in return. She blushed and ran off. He felt so old.

After a few seconds, Toph joined him, now securely wrapped up in her warm shawl. "I can't believe you were cold," he teased, putting his arm around her.

"I'm much warmer now," she replied, leaning into his everpresent heat. "I heard what you said to Eun Min."

"Eavesdropping, huh?" he laughed.

"No," she defended herself in mock seriousness, "I just didn't want to intrude on a private conversation." Then she put her hand on his knee and gave it a squeeze. "You did good, Sparky," she said warmly. "I am really proud of you."

"I just told her the truth," he said smoothly, but knowing that his wife approved of his words made him feel that much better. Maybe he helped her. He hoped so.

Soon the evening chill drove everyone back inside again for more conversation. Zuko noticed that Eun Min had found a seat next to The Duke and was listening to him and Sokka tell incredible tall tales of shipwrecks and giant sea creatures. He was glad she'd relaxed a little.

After a bit, Sokka yawned. "Big day tomorrow, huh, Jet?" he observed, opening the can of worms in his typically casual fashion. Zuko figured he felt like he had to do it. He was worried. They all were.

"I still don't think you should do it," Toph stated firmly. "There's got to be another way than to risk your life."

Jet shot a hard look at her. He did not want to have this conversation at the moment; unfortunately the rest of the group did.

"What do you mean, risk your life?" Smellerbee asked sharply. "I thought you were better, Jet."

Jet listened as his 'friends' proceeded to gang up on him. Once Smellerbee had the full story of what that earthbending match could do to him, she joined her voice to all the rest—Pipsqueak, The Duke, and even Longshot adding their two cents' worth.

Only Eun Min and Mai said nothing. Eun Min just seemed out of her depth, but Mai sat quietly beside him, her only communication was to squeeze his hand when she agreed with what the others said. She squeezed a lot, but at least she didn't fight with him in front of everyone else.

To his surprise, the only one who stood by him was Zuko.

"Guys," Zuko stated, "Jet knows the risks. He knows what he's doing. If there was another way, he'd take it. Let him make up his own mind."

Then Mai spoke up. "Maybe there is another way," she began quietly and looked at Jet, apology in her eyes. "I mean, someone tried to kidnap you the other day to keep you out of the fight. If we can trace that back to Ji-Fu, then King Bumi will have grounds to at least throw him out of the contest for cheating."

Across the room, Zuko noticed that Eun Min suddenly got up and made herself scarce. She was afraid. She was afraid they'd ask her to tell what she knew and in doing so reveal the whole story of where they'd found her.

The group bandied theories for a moment, but no one had enough information to form any kind of real plan. The only one with knowledge that could possibly help them had gone to hide in the kitchens.

Eun Min wandered around, avoiding the glances of the curious kitchen staff. She couldn't identify the man she believed had ordered the kidnapping. But she could identify at least one of his men. She reached up to her face with a shaky hand. The bruises he'd given her still hadn't quite healed.

She'd never forget his face or the new tattoo he'd been so proud of. She slipped into a pantry, closed the door, and sat on the floor in the dark, her arms wrapped tightly around her knees as she curled up against the memory.

It had been a military tattoo. This man Jet was supposed to fight was a general. It all added up to her. It had to be the same man—this General Ji-Fu had to be the man in the covered palanquin who'd met with Suk-Chul.

She rocked back and forth as she considered what coming forward would mean. First of all, the truth about her life in the brothel would come out. Everyone would know what she'd been—The Duke would know.

And if she identified that man with the tattoo, she'd have to face him again. She'd have to look him in the eye and identify him. She'd have to remember the things he'd done to her.

Eun Min pressed the heels of her hands into her eyes as if she could block out the memory by blocking out her sight. She was too distressed to cry. The kind of fear and self-loathing that threatened to come out of her was too powerful for tears.

There was a soft knock at the door and it opened, allowing a shaft of light into the small pantry. Eun Min looked up to see Smellerbee standing there. She stood and fell trembling into her friend's arms. Smellerbee just held her and stroked her hair. Eun Min wondered if she'd ever feel whole again.

After a while, Eun Min and Smellerbee rejoined the group, which had progressed to drinking tea. Zuko was telling yet another Iroh tea story to everyone's laughter. Eun Min didn't hear a word of it, but laughed with the rest of them anyway.

At last the party broke up, even though no one was really ready to part company. Smellerbee, Longshot, Pipsqueak, and The Duke all promised to be at the public stadium at noon. "I'll have good seats for you guys—for all of you," Jet declared, including Eun Min in the invitation. She couldn't even look at him.

When they got back to the leather shop, Eun Min stopped Smellerbee in the little hallway outside the storeroom she slept in.

"Was this where Jet stayed?" Eun Min asked quietly.

"Yes, it was," Smellerbee replied. "Why do you ask?"

"How long have you known him?" Eun Min asked in reply.

"Nearly all my life," Smellerbee said with a sigh. Then she seemed to come to some sort of decision in her head and walked into the store room with Eun Min. They both took a seat on Jet's bedroll and Smellerbee began to talk.

"I'm going to tell you how we met because I think you need to hear this," she began quietly. "No one else knows about this but Longshot. He was there too."

Smellerbee began to tell Eun Min of when she was a little girl. She'd lived with her grandmother in a village that had been attacked by Fire Nation soldiers so many times that people frequently just lived in the burned out wreckage of buildings rather than rebuild again.

Her mother had died of a fever when she was a toddler and her father had gone off to fight the Fire Nation and had not been seen again.

When she was nine years old, her grandmother had also died during the winter, leaving Smellerbee alone in the world. Neighbors had taken her in, but that spring, the Fire Nation attacked again, leaving the village in desolation, the residents scattered. Smellerbee had lost contact with everyone she knew.

A man came through the village with the soldiers and had been kind to her. His name was Sang. He'd given her food and had patched up her burns and scrapes. Then he'd told her he was going to take her to live with him in a very nice house with good food and pretty clothes.

"I was so happy," Smellerbee said with a sad sigh. "I had no idea what he really had planned for me. We left the village behind the soldiers and headed out toward the nearest city. Before long, Sang began to look at me in ways that made me nervous and touch me in ways that I knew wasn't right. I was so scared of him after a while that I tried to run away."

They were deep within a forest when she'd made her break for it. "I ran as hard as I could, but he caught me. He tore my shirt off and said he was tired of keeping me intact for someone else. He said he'd teach me not to run from him again," her voice sounded tired and strained.

"Then out of nowhere, this tall, dark-haired, green-eyed boy jumped out of a tree with a piece of grass in his mouth and a pair of twin hook-swords in his hands," Smellerbee continued. "He told Sang to leave me alone. When Sang didn't listen, Jet fought him. I'd never been so scared in all my life. Sang was twice as big—Jet couldn't have been more than 12 or 13."

The fight had been brutal. Jet's speed and accuracy were not quite a match for Sang's strength and experience. Within moments, Jet was bleeding from several cuts. But he refused to give in, he kept leading Sang around the little clearing until he got him where he wanted him.

"Stop!" came a shout from overhead. A boy in a coolie hat held a bow, arrow on the string, steadily aimed at Sang's heart.

"Okay, okay," Sang acquiesced, lowering his sword. But the second Longshot's attention wavered, he'd jumped at Jet. Without pause, Jet stepped into his thrust, barely knocking the sword blade to the side with one sword and catching Sang's throat with the hook of the other. Blood had showered over him as the big man went down, his throat ripped open.

She'd watched in horror as Jet had stood there shaking, his eyes wide, covered in blood. Longshot climbed down out of the tree and stood beside him.

"You killed him, Jet," Longshot stated in shock. "What are we going to do?"

Jet looked at him and at her. Smellerbee watched him grow up in an instant as the scared boy inside Jet was shouldered aside by a determined young man. "You saw what he meant to do to her," Jet replied angrily. "He didn't deserve to live. Just leave him here."

They began to walk back into the trees, but Smellerbee just stood there in shock. Then Jet turned back to her. "Are you coming?" he asked.

She nodded and ran ahead to join them. They stopped for a moment at a little stream where Jet unselfconsciously stripped off his bloody clothing and plunged into the water, sending a red stain downstream as he washed himself clean. "Can't let The Duke see me like this," he explained to her, but the explanation meant nothing at the time.

She couldn't help but watch at him there on the bank, wearing only his shorts as he washed out his leather vest and trousers. Soon he'd dressed and they came to a stand of trees. Longshot gave a whistle and a knotted rope dropped before them. She'd followed him up to a rough treehouse, the start of Jet's eventual city in the branches, and joined the group.

"Within a couple of days they'd changed my name to Smellerbee because I found a dragonbee's nest full of honey, and I became one of the guys," Smellerbee explained.

"So what's your real name?" Eun Min asked.

Smellerbee looked at her a little oddly and replied, "Mei-lin. I'd almost forgot. I haven't been Mei-lin in a very long time."

"So did you and Jet ever? You know?" Eun Min couldn't help but ask.

"I loved him from the moment I saw him," Smellerbee replied. "But to him I was one of the guys. I guess I'll always love him at some level. But he never felt like that about me."

"Was it because of Sang?" Eun Min asked nervously.

"I don't think so. Jet always treated me like a kid sister—or brother for a long time. It took me a while to get past it all and reclaim my girl self," Smellerbee answered. "Give yourself some time too. You'll get through it. You're strong."

Eun Min reached under the bedroll to pull out the bag of coins Jet had given her. "This is an awful lot of money," she began.

"Jet gave you that, didn't he," Smellerbee said, recognizing the leather bag.

"Yes, I didn't know how much was in it when he gave it to me. It's an awful lot of money," she answered.

"He wants you to take it and make a new life with it," Smellerbee said, pressing the bag into Eun Min's hands. "Don't feel guilty. That's just how he is." Then giving her a smile, Smellerbee got up and headed to bed.

Eun Min turned the bag of money over in her hand. She did feel guilty. Jet and Zuko had rescued her. Jet had given all this money to her, never expecting anything in return. Now she had a way to repay him if she could identify that awful man. But could she bring herself to do it?

Eun Min lay down to sleep, but every time she shut her eyes she saw that face, that tattoo. Finally, she grew so exhausted that she drifted off to sleep despite herself, her dreams restless.

Smellerbee walked out of the storeroom and to the kitchen. She made herself a cup of tea and sat down to think.

Jet had given all his money to Eun Min without a second thought. She wasn't surprised. Jet had given away plenty of money to girls over the years. She remembered the night she'd learned about this side of him.

After they'd been separated by the fire on the day of the comet, Jet had spent nearly two years on his own, believing Smellerbee and Longshot to be dead. In his grief and loneliness, he'd turned bandit. He'd rediscovered them while raiding their own village and had begun helping the village keep bandits away.

It had been a tough time for Jet. He had been working through some pretty serious issues inside himself, trying to figure out who he was supposed to be—Freedom Fighter or street thug—bandit or protector.

It was soon after he'd re-entered their life that he came in from village guard duty late one night, tired but keyed up about something. Longshot had already gone to sleep across their little rented room, but she was still awake when he came in. Somehow she knew he needed to talk, so she got up to sit with him.

"I just don't want to spend the rest of my life alone," he'd said to her out of nowhere. "I mean, I look at what you guys have together. You're so lucky. You've found a peace in life. I've spent all my life fighting somebody—the Fire Nation, innocent people, now bandits."

"At least you're back fighting the bad guys again," Smellerbee had commented easily, hoping to lighten his mood.

He just gave her a tired look. "I don't want to fight. I just want to find somebody and be happy. I don't want to be alone anymore," Jet had sighed.

Smellerbee thought about telling him he wasn't alone, that he had her and Longshot, but she knew that wasn't what he meant.

Then he said what was really bothering him. "But I'm always going to be alone. I've tried to find somebody, but I can't. Back with the gangs I even tried going to a brothel with them. I figured I could pay somebody to be with me—to be close to somebody just for a little while."

Then he looked up at her and for a second she saw the scared boy she'd met in the woods so long ago. "But the first girl I laid eyes on in that place looked so young and so terrified. It was like seeing you when that guy tried to---" he broke off, looking away for a moment. Then he turned back to her and said, "Smellerbee, I paid for her just so she wouldn't have to be with one of those guys I was with. And I couldn't take advantage of her that way. So I paid for her and let her sleep."

"After that, any time the gang wanted to go to a brothel, I played along. They all thought I was some kind of pervert because I'd always pick out the youngest and scaredest girl in the room," he said with a bitter laugh. "But I just let her rest. None of them ever said anything but thank you."

The little fire flickered behind him as he sat for a moment. "Even when they tried to pay me back in the only way they could—you know--" he sounded embarrassed. "I just couldn't let them. I tried once to go for a girl who looked like she actually wanted to be there, but when she started in on me, I just couldn't do it. It wasn't right," he said sadly.

Then he got up and poked at the fire a moment before continuing. "But now if I see a girl at a shop or working somewhere and I think, she seems interesting, so I talk to her, if she seems interested back, I get all nervous and run the other way. What is wrong with me?" he said, the words running out of him in a rush, his hands shaking.

Smellerbee could tell what it had taken to get this worry out of him. She wondered how many girls had wished he'd been able to stop and talk, how many had wished they could pay him in the only way they could.

She'd certainly wished over the years she could be the one he turned to. But he wasn't the one for her. She glanced across the room where Longshot lay, his arm resting within easy reach of his bow. Old habits were hard to break, she thought fondly. Then she turned back to Jet. Her heart went out to him. Loneliness seemed to roll off him in waves.

"I think maybe you're trying too hard," Smellerbee advised gently. "There is nothing wrong with you. You are probably the only real gentleman I've ever met and the girl who finally manages to get past all your defenses will be the luckiest girl in the world."

"I am no gentleman, Smellerbee," he'd said bitterly. "I'm a killer and a thief and a thug. I'm not worth a nice girl's attention and I'm too cowardly to go after a bad girl. I'm always going to be alone."

She'd patted him on the shoulder and said, "You worry too much. Somewhere out there is the right girl for you. She'll be just bad enough to understand you and good enough to to be good for you, trust me."

Now as Smellerbee walked down the hall of the leathershop to the bedroom where her husband waited for her, his arm still within easy reach of his bow, she thought about her prediction, then about Lady Mai of the Fire Nation. If two people were ever made for each other, it had to be her and Jet.

She just hoped Mai appreciated what she'd found.