Date Four: Concerts aren't Meant for the Weak (part 1)

A/N: as of late, my moods have been spiraling which greatly affects the performance of my writing. But I wanted to take an idea I had for another piece of fiction and incorporate it here as a date. Idealized and mentally perfected by my taste of music, which is nowhere near pop or rap or "today's hits." It's rather far off the charts, on the opposite end of the spectrum. More heavy, more loud, more emotionally invoking. *smiles slightly* so enjoy the emotional laden chappy.

Rangiku found herself lying out on her bed, ears plugged and trying to make sense of the CDs Ikkaku loaned her.

"For this date, it'll be postponed until next Friday." He had said, trying to hide his excitement. "The captains said that was okay, so in the meantime familiarize yourself with these." He handed her a stack of CDs all by one artist. "The concert we're going to is going to play whatever track the majority of the crowd yells for, so choose your favorites."

So here she was making her way through a track called "Reply" by Staind. At first the Tormented album was a new sound to her. Yet, slowly she worked through Dysfunction, Chapter V, Break the Cycle, 14 Shades of Grey, Illusion of Progress, and finally the 2011 self titled. It was her second go through, a stenopad beside her with every track listed, and some scratched off that she didn't feel the tug of emotions; the break of something within her.

Something that made everything seem so much realer.

She crossed her hands behind her head and closed her eyes, drowning in Aaron Lewis' vocals and story.

She focused on regulating her breathing, which was becoming uneven as her eyes threatened to tear up. She knew what she surpressing. She knew what she was hiding. But how could any one understand? They wouldn't believe her.

On the steno pad she had most of the songs circled as favorites, and eventually gave up on the list. However she'd keep it to go by on friday. In time she fell half asleep, "Schizophrenic Conversations" faintly reminding her she was still somewhat awake.

"Yo," Ikkaku poke his head around the door, rapping on the doorframe. "You still listening to those CDs?"

"Bout to hit Break the Cycle for the second time." She yawned, sitting up. He sat on the edge of her bed, nodding quietly. "What's up?"

"So far, what tracks do you like? Off each album." He smiled faintly, his eyes glazed like and hard to read.

"Tolerate off Tormented, Me, Mudshovel, and Excess Baggage off Dysfunction, practically the whole Break the Cycle and 14 Shades of Grey; and off Illusion of Progress: Raining Again, the Corner, Nothing left to Say, and Pardon Me. As for Chapter V.." She shifted her jaw a little to the side and ran a hand through her hair. Her eyes closed and in rapid fire she spit the tracks out. "Schizophrenic Conversations, Everything Changes, Trippy, Please, Reply, Devil, and Right Here."

"What about the self titled?" His eyes brightened, glad to see she was taking an interest in his taste of music.

"Erm, Eyes Wide Open and Something to Remind You, I guess. I haven't listened to it often enough yet." She admitted, stacking the CDs and getting to her feet. Ikkaku stayed sitting on her bed, tossing a question in his head for a moment.

"Did..did Ichimaru do something to you last fall?" He asked hesitantly. Rangiku paused, turning slightly to look at him. Her eyes said 'yes' but her mouth said 'no, not that I recall.'

Another white lie, another reminder to him Rangiku was cautious of telling. Of trusting. He got up, placing his palm against her door, keeping it shut.

"Stop lying to me." He said soft yet assertively. "Stop thinking you have me fooled."

"About what?" She quickly appeared confused, but inside she was panicking. Just how many hints did she drop? How many lies did he see through? How did he know?

"Whatever you are hiding." He said swiftly, watching her face contort with a mixture of emotions.

"Madarame," she said carefully. "I'm not hiding anything."

"Stop lying dammit!" He barked, watching her flinch. "Rangiku, why do you keep trying to convince me nothing is wrong?!"

"Because nothing is!" She shot back, staring at him with distant half aware eyes. "Now, please leave my room."

His eyes raced over her face, trying to find what was eating at her. He reached forward, brushing her cheek.

"Tell me." He whispered. "Please."

Her eyes watered, but her lips stayed tightly pressed together.

'This is bad,' she thought. 'This is very very bad...'

She shook her head, cracking, "I can't."

"Why not?" Pain seemed to warp Ikkaku's voice. "Why can't you tell me?"

"Because it doesn't concern you." She said shakily, moving her head. She turned her back, hugging herself. "It's none of your business-"

"You know that's a lie." He said, a mix of anger and hurt shaking in his tone. "I do care, I have always cared."

She didn't say anything. She kept her eyes trained on the floor, hugging herself tighter.

"Please, just go." She whispered.

"Fine..." He said after a moment. "But I expect you in a better mood come Friday."

Her door clicked shut, his hands still clutching the knob. He listened to her collapse and cry softly. He fought against the urge to rush back in and hold her, soothe her, and tell her it would be okay. He sauntered down the stairs and stopped by Unohana's office on the third floor.

"Oi, Unohana-taichou," he began. She looked up and smiled warmly. Zaraki looked up from the notes she was showing him and cracked a harsh smile.

"Yes Ikkaku?" She asked.

"So you came to seek love advice?" Zaraki laughed, getting up. "Very well." He clapped Ikkaku's shoulder, murmuring for him to hear. "You've done well so far, and there are things you need to know. You're still a man Madarame."

"Thank you sir." He nodded, watching his captain tower down the hall, scaring the fourth divisioners.

Unohana sat back and motioned for him to take a seat.

"It's about miss Rangiku is it not?" She asked softly. Ikkaku shut the door before nodding.

"What happened last fall?" He asked, eyeing her intently. "What happened between her and Ichimaru?"

Unohana sighed softly, ducking her head. "No one knows unfortunately. It must be something he said, an idea he placed in her mind or an act that made her go into this reclusive state."

"She hasn't dropped any hints to anyone has she?"

"No." She shook her head gravely. She grew quiet for a moment and looked at him sincerely. "Can I ask you to protect her? Oh behalf of me, Hitsugaya-taichou, and Zaraki-sama?"

"Of course." He promised. "I will protect her with my life."

"Good." Hitsugaya said, stepping out from the wall. "Forgive my intrusion Madarame, but I need you to keep a strict eye on her. My lieutenant is not the same. Ichimaru must of said or done something last fall to get her in this state as Unohana said. However, I fear that man will return asking her to join Aizen's party."

"Rangiku would never-" Ikkaku began.

"Madarame. This is Rangiku Matsumoto we're talking about." Hitsugaya interjected, his face wrapped in a serious complexion. "Who owes her life to this traitor, who knows know other type of love than him. Love is cursed. It just may be enough to make her avoid logical thinking. Whatever the case is, I need you to find out. Understood?"

The earnest look on Hitsugaya's face was enough to convince the third seat. He nodded and got to his feet.

"Understood sir."

"And Ikkaku," Unohana added. "Take good care of her. She needs more comfort than she knows."

He nodded and dismissed himself. Rangiku sat against the bottom of her bed, her eyes sore from shedding tears. She sighed, staring at her window.

"You betrayed me," she whispered to herself. "You took our child from me.." She fought down another wave of tears. "Why Gin? Why did you do that? What possessed you..?"