Chapter 3

Sometimes, his dreams moved in slow motion. Zuko would find himself trapped, usually surrounded, and he would urge himself to move faster, but it was like he was moving through cold honey. Each blow he dealt with his dao failed to have the desired impact. He was never fast enough.

He watched as the blood flew outward from freshly made wounds.

The smell was always with him, too, in these dreams. The burning. Burning he caused. His shirt might have caught fire, but mostly it was other people. He understood fire, its danger and its beauty, and he could control it when it came near to him, send it back to his owner, use it as a shield against other fire. Burn a Dai Lee agent.

Zuko wasn't sure what jarred him out of sleep this time, but he was grateful for it. Faintly, he could still smell the burning, and he took deep breaths of the unscented air around him. Katara was still sleeping curled up against him, and he buried his face in her hair. He was trying to lock the past back in its hidden compartment when he heard the doorknob jiggling. He caught the words lotus and kill and triumph. Someone was trying to break into their room. He lay quiet and tried to pick out the muffled voices, guessing there to be three people. The light was wrong for him to see shadows under the door.

Placing his hand over Katara's mouth, he roughly shook her as he slid out of the bed, dragging her with him. He knew it was cruel, especially since he'd been dreaming about that fight, that it would sent her back there as well, but this time he wouldn't risk her making a sound. She was a heavy sleeper and hated being woken up. She fought fiercely, elbowing him hard in the ribs. He bit back the groan and whispered, "It's me, it's Zuko" into her ear as quietly as he possibly could. When she stopped struggling against him, he pointed to the door opposite their bed, mimed for her to be quiet, and then mouthed an apology. He didn't wait to see if she'd stopped glaring before he shoved her waterskins in her hands, then pulled out his dao.

Picking the lock must not have been as easy as their assailant thought it would be. He cursed loudly, and Zuko recognized the voice of the old lady's son. Taking advantage of the darkness and their black clothing, Zuko and Katara placed their backs against the wall so that they would be hidden when the door opened. Zuko silently thanked Hau for getting them a room with no windows. That was immediately followed by Zuko cursing him because they just had to get stuck in a hostile inn.

The lock clicked and the door inched open. Katara drew water out of her skins. They watched the men enter their room. Three of them. No, one of them was a woman, and Zuko knew her, the bounty hunter Atem; he had hired her to work for him on several occasions to ferret out dangerous Ozai supporters and war criminals. He hoped like all hell she wasn't there to kill them, because then they'd have to fight for real, and he'd rather save his strength for saving his mother.

Zuko slammed the door closed as Katara froze the owner's son to the wall and placed a cuff made of ice over his mouth so he couldn't yell for backup. Zuko swept his leg in a low arc, tripping the man closest to him while Katara went for Atem. He grabbed a handful of the man's hair and slammed his head into the floor twice, knocking him unconscious. Katara covered her arm in ice to deflect the blade of Atem's knife, and Zuko kicked her in the back of her knee. Before she could recover, Zuko bent a flame and shot it to a wall scone.

"Back down, why are you here?" Zuko said, issuing the command and demand in rapid succession as Katara grabbed the woman's wrist and shoved her to the ground, putting pressure on her shoulder.

"Well, I didn't expect to see you here," she said, laughing jovially. "Let me up, kiddo."

Katara tightened her grip, threatening to dislocate the Atem's shoulder. "No dice."

"Call off your attack dog, Fire Lord. I'm unarmed."

"So says the woman who pulled a knife on me," Katara said.

"The command still stands. Back down and tell us why you're here."

Against the wall, the owner's son was frantically shaking his head back and forth, his eyes wide with fear. Zuko sent him a glare, the one he kept for Toph when she was way out of control. The man tried to make himself as small as possible, but being encased in ice made that rather hard to do.

"Gen told me two of Hau's bounty hunters came by flashing a White Lotus tile," Atem said, nodding toward the owner's son. "I've been waiting for weeks for someone to flash that damn tile so I could pass along a letter."

"Then why were you picking the lock to get into our room?" Katara demanded, roughly shoving her knee into Atem's back.

"Would you get off me? And I wasn't the one picking the lock."

Zuko knelt in front of her. "Details…"

Atem smirked. "You know, you look so much like your father when you do that."

Atem hadn't finished getting the words out before Katara slammed her head into the wood. When she lifted her head, Atem's eyes were a little dazed, and her nose was bloody. Zuko looked at Katara and raised his eyebrow, but she only gave him a look, daring him to say anything. He backed down.

"Why were you with Gen, who was picking the lock?" Katara asked through gritted teeth.

"He was going to pay me to kill you. Figured I'd come along, see who it was first."

"Why didn't you attack us? Katara, you can let her go. If she really meant to kill us, we'd still be fighting her."

Reluctantly, Katara got off Atem's back, but she never took her eyes off the bounty hunter. Slowly, Atem got to her feet and started rubbing her shoulder. Then she pulled out a rag and wiped at her nose.

"One does their best not to cross the White Lotus Society," Atem said. She took a step forward, and Zuko saw real fear in her eyes. Jerkily, Atem moved backward.

"You'll stay right where you are," Katara hissed, one by one releasing Atem's limbs.

When she fully had control of herself again, Atem turned, terrified, to Katara. "What the hell did you just do to me?"

"Atem, meet Master waterbender and Master healer, the Lady Katara, Ambassador of the Southern Water Tribe. Avatar Aang's waterbending teacher. The only Southern waterbender, and the only female Master," Zuko said, no small amount of pride in his voice. They were both standing a little straighter, their shoulders back. They shared a smile.

Atem looked back and forth between the two of them. "You're all just kids..." She shook her head, and Zuko was surprised to see that she actually looked sad. It wasn't the first time they'd gotten that reaction. He suspected some people felt shame that they had to be saved by a bunch of teenagers.

"What the hell! I'm seventeen!" Katara yelled, clearly not affected by Atem's sadness. He'd had too many earfuls from Katara about her dislike for their pity and their shame.

"You better stop it, or she'll do it again," Zuko teased Atem. "Who's the letter from?"

"I don't know. It's sealed with the lotus in pink wax, addressed to the Fire Lord."

"Where is it?"

"In my room. Meet me in the parlor in an hour, and I'll give it to you. I was supposed to hand it to whatever operative showed the tile, and they would make sure it got to you."

"What was your price?" Zuko asked.

"I've got several big bounties on my own head. Makes it hard to do my work. In exchange for services rendered for three months, they would make sure those bounties were removed, and boy have they been getting their money's worth." Atem removed the rag from her nose. She sniffed.

"It's a good deal."

"For them. I bet it was your uncle who came up with it. Ever since he took up with that Jun, it's like he's got a fetish for bounty hunters."

"So did not want to hear that," Zuko said, wrinkling his nose. "We'll meet you in an hour." Zuko began shoving Atem out of the door.

"Wait," Katara called. "Take that with you," she said, pointing at the unconscious body on the floor. Atem huffed before grabbing the man by one of his legs and dragging him out the door.

As soon as the door was closed, Zuko rounded on Get, clapping his hand over the ice cuff and melting it. Once the heat touched Gen's face, he started beating against the ice again, trying to get away from Zuko.

"How did you afford the money to buy a hunter of her caliber?"

"I didn't know my Lord!" Gen babbled after Zuko removed his hand. "Please! Please don't kill me."

"Attempting to kill the Fire Lord is an offense punishable by death."

Gen only wailed.

"Why do you hate the White Lotus?" Katara asked, stepping up beside Zuko. She stretched her fingers, slightly tilting them into a bloodbending pose, knowing Gen saw what she did to Atem.

"They're the reason we're here, now! We had a whole life in the Earth Kingdom that they destroyed, but my mother refuses to see things that way. She said they were helping us, but all I saw was them causing trouble. Now those White Lotus guys and you are using her. She keeps letting them use out inn to hide their trash in—"

Zuko didn't work terribly closely with the White Lotus Society, but he knew that they were instrumental in keeping some rebellions at bay. They had eyes and ears all over the four nations, and could often detect anger and resentment before any of the local governments could. If the problem was small enough, local operatives would do their best to talk the people down from their anger. If citizens were too close to violent action, though, the White Lotus guys knew when to hand it over. They'd saved Zuko's skin so many times before. He couldn't be everywhere at once, and too many people with wounded pride took it to mean that Zuko wasn't loyal to his country, and that he'd give it all away. He'd been able to step in before the riots got too far out of hand.

"I'm done with you," Zuko said, turning his back to Gen. It had nothing to do with him that Gen's mother wanted to help the White Lotus Society keep peace.

Katara melted the water around Gen, and put it back in her waterskins. Gen immediately fell to the floor at Zuko's feet. "Please, my Lord, don't be mad! My mother—"

"You'll keep your mouth shut about everything that went on here, or you'll have hell to pay. Now, get out of my sight," he growled.

Gen ran from the room, scrambling undignified on all fours, and falling down the stairs in his haste to get away, lest Zuko change his mind.

Alone again, Zuko turned toward Katara and held his arms open to her. She stepped to him, and he crushed her in a big hug, kissing the top of her head.

"I am so, so sorry for waking you up like that."

She was shaking against him, clutching him and burying her face in his chest. It ripped a hole in his heart to have to do that to her. She'd been there; she'd seen and done the same things he had, and when that final fight seemed so hopeless, she'd reached into a bag of "forbidden" techniques and sacrificed just as he had sacrificed. She told him how heavy it weighed on her once. When she first met Hama, she hadn't been able to understand how the woman could let herself be corrupted, but they'd all come to understand that it wasn't so much letting yourself be corrupted as it was feeling you had no choice. When it's your life or theirs, you find yourself glad that you didn't know your enemy personally. It made the selfishness easier to bear. Well, almost all of them had come to understand that. Someone had a lion turtle that allowed them to avoid that realization altogether, and it filled Zuko with so much bitterness to know that only Aang was spared. Only occasionally would he admit that it was bitterness and jealousy.

"When she…I could see his face, Zuko. It's like I was back there, and I could hear Ozai laughing and taunting, and it made me so angry. I shouldn't have smashed her face down like that. I shouldn't have bloodbent her, I know that. But when I was doing it? Spirits, I didn't feel any remorse, and that scares me."

She pulled him closer, moving her arms up his back and fisting her hands in the fabric. She took in a few choked breaths, and he buried his face in her hair.

"Make me forget," she begged, and when she looked up at him, he kissed her.

He was still new to this whole comforting others thing, but he'd learned the best way to counteract pain was with pleasure or laughter. He was never good at intentionally making people laugh, so he did the next best thing. He ran his fingers through her hair, gently bringing her closer to him and ran his tongue across her lips and she opened her mouth for him. He pulled her tighter and tighter against him, and he felt her give way, and they tried to meld into one person. If they had twice the strength, the pain might be easier to bear. She was slipping her hands under his shirt, caressing his bare back. He pushed into her more, and wondered if she could feel his heart beating quicker.

When he felt her begin to push back against him in their traditional dance of dominance, he knew he'd done his job for now, and he let go. But only a little. He loved it when she was aggressive, and now she was biting his lip. He broke the kiss and lightly ran his lips down her neck.

"Zoozles, that tickles," Katara said, her arms wrapped around his waist and her voice much lighter. "Don't get frisky, now."

"Don't worry. We'll both need our strength."

Katara ran her nails down Zuko's back and smiled when he inhaled sharply. He narrowed his eyes at her. "Remember, you started this," she challenged.

When she tried to turn away, Zuko grabbed her and shoved her against the wall, his hands on either side of her. He licked from her collarbone all the way to her ear, and when her knees buckled, he shoved his leg between hers to keep her from falling, as she grabbed onto the sides of his shirt.

"I hate you so much," Katara said, still holding him. He noticed the smile didn't quite reach her eyes. They were only masking the pain, but it would have to do for the time being.

Zuko kissed her quickly on the lips. "Seriously, though, we should drop this before things get out of hand—"

"There's nothing in my hands, but if there was, I wouldn't be dropping anything."

Zuko stared dumbly at Katara. People were always disarmed by her. Like Atem, many looked at Katara and only saw a sweet girl who couldn't possibly be capable of manipulation or killing someone. That tended to be their downfall. But Zuko, he prided himself on knowing every facet of her, from the sweet caregiver, right down to the dirty minx who could turn a man to putty with a look and a smile. Still, there were moments when she caught him off guard. He knew she lived for those moments, and likely relished his blank stare and silence.

Expertly removing herself from the wall, Katara gathered their sweaty clothes and headed to the bathroom to wash them out.

"If you're done standing around like your brain leaked out, you could get to sharpening our weapons."

Zuko pushed himself off the wall and watched as she sauntered into the bathroom. She was swaying her hips like that on purpose, just to get his attention, to distract them both. And damn it, it was working.