Disclaimer: I only own Evie.
A/N: I'm back with another update, yay! Thanks to all those who read and reviewed. You guys are the best. As always enjoy & review!
She was having difficulty seeing, the tears were blurring her vision. Maybe she shouldn't have talked to him. It would have been better for the two of them if they hadn't gone down memory lane. The past should have just stayed in the past. Her heart was even more broken then before.
"Evie, Evie are you okay?" She heard a voice question her. "Look at me."
She wiped away her tears before she looked up at him. Her heart began to beat when she saw who it was. She smiled weakly at him. Evie was beyond words at this point. She was confused and didn't really feel like talking to anyone.
"I'm fine John."
"No, you're not." John replied as he wrapped his arms around her shoulders. Slowly, he led her toward the bank of elevators. "Something's bothering you, so lets talk."
"John, I can't." She sniffled. "I don't want to burden you with it."
"You're not going to burden me."
She just ignored him as they got off the elevator. Quietly, they walked down the hall to her room. Evie pushed the door open and walked in first, John followed, closing the door behind him.
"Do you want to talk about it now?"
"I'm just going to go change." Evie said as she grabbed her things. Silently, she walked into the bathroom. Knowing that John was waiting for her, she took her sweet time getting ready. She was hoping that he would get sick of waiting for her and leave. Twenty minutes later she walked back into her room. She was surprised to see that he was still there. "I'm sorry that I took so long."
"Not a problem." John said as he got off the bed he was sitting on. He knew exactly what she was doing. There were many times when he just wanted to get and up and leave, but he couldn't. He wanted to be there for her. "You want to talk about it?"
"Not really." Evie said as she bent down to pick up her clothes that she had tossed on the floor earlier in the day.
John inwardly groaned when she bent down. The t-shirt that she was wearing rode up. Giving him a better view of her toned legs and her, uh, her assets. It didn't help that she had on lace panties. Sighing, he sat down and threw a pillow on his lap, so she would see his...growing friend.
"Really John, its nothing." Evie said as she put her clothes in her suitcase. "You can leave. Its nothing you have to worry about."
"I'm not leaving." John said outright. "Something is obviously bothering you when you come into the hotel crying."
"I'll talk if you talk." She bargained, when she realized that he wasn't going to leave.
"What do you mean?"
"You drank yourself stupid the other night." She replied. "Obviously, something was bothering you. Perhaps troubles with your fiance?"
"How did you know?"
"Randy may have mentioned something to me."
He gripped onto the pillow tightly. If he could, he would kill Randy for telling her. He didn't want anyone to know about his problems with his fiance. Its not like anyone liked her to begin with. Truthfully, he felt a little embarrassed by his fiance's actions.
"I could kill him."
"Nah, you have no reason to." Evie said, waving his words off. "He didn't go any further than that."
"I don't want to talk about it."
Getting up, Evie walked over to the bed that John was sitting on. Silently, she sat next to him. "I can't tell you whats bothering me because I'm not ready. There's a lot that comes with my troubles."
"Does it have to do with Ted?"
Shocked, Evie just shook her head, ignoring the question. She wasn't ready for him to know. They were still on a getting to know each other basis. Besides, she knew if she told him about Ted, then he would just get up and leave. Why bother with her then, she knew he would think.
"Its nothing to worry about."
John threw his head back in frustration. He knew she was lying. Earlier in the night, when he was leaving the arena, he had overheard Ted telling Cody that he was going to talk to Evie. It was obvious to him that the conversation hadn't gone all that well, considering the fact that she was crying when she came back.
"If you say so." He said slightly annoyed.
She picked up on his annoyance. She was slightly confused as to what was bothering him. It didn't occur to her that he had an idea as to who she was with earlier.
"What's wrong?"
Sighing, John turned his gaze towards hers. The look on her face said it all; she knew something was bothering him too. And it wasn't his troubles with Liz that was bothering him now. He knew that she wouldn't drop it, so he figured he'd tell her what was bothering him two nights ago. She'd never know the difference.
"The night we were supposed to hang out, my fiance and I got into a fight. Somehow she found out that you and I left the airport together. She got jealous, called me and accused me of cheating on her. While I admit that her record and my record isn't exactly the greatest, I haven't cheated since we got engaged. I figured that it was time to put all that aside and act like a mature adult, not at horny seventeen year old. From there we just found anything and everything to fight about."
"I'm sorry."
"Eh, its not your fault." John replied, shaking off his fight with Liz. Quite frankly, he didn't care anymore. "She gets jealous real easy. Trust me, this isn't the first time we've fought."
"Sounds like love." Evie replied sarcastically.
"You're not the first one to tell me that, its a reoccurring theme in my family."
"Sounds like you guys have been together for a long time."
"On and off since high school."
Evie whistled. That had been a long time. He obviously had the will and faith to keep going with. Especially when the relationship seemed to have died a long time ago.
"That seems like forever."
"Believe me, it is." John said, nodding in agreement. "I'm trying to hang in there. But theres only so much that I can take."
"Do you love her?"
"I don't know." John replied honestly. "I've got a lot on my mind."
She took that as her cue to drop the subject.
"If you say so."
The two sat in a short silence. Evie smiled when she noticed the pillow that John was holding on his lap. Her right eyebrow quirked up in curiosity. Why would he need the pillow?
"Whats with the pillow?"
John felt his face redden. He was hoping that she wouldn't notice. It would be awkward to tell her that he got happy when he was checking her out. Oh, there was that to admit to also. It was better he just try to keep the subject away from his happiness.
"No reason, just felt like holding a pillow." John said, hoping that she would drop the subject.
She shot him a curious glance. There was another reason. He was acting strange, but she couldn't quite figure out why. She shrugged it off, she would probably figure it out eventually. If she didn't, oh well, its not the end of the world.
"Do you want to tell me whats bothering you?"
Sighing, she had to think fast. He had told her what was bothering him, so now it was only fair to tell him too. But she couldn't tell him the truth, not right now. So, she figured that it'd be better to lie. Thinking on her feet, she quickly made up a story.
"My ex boyfriend was at tonight's show. He heard that I was now with the WWE, so he wanted to check things out for himself. This guy was a real deadbeat, which is why I left him. He had no job, and he never really cared to have one." Evie began, making this up as she went along. "Somehow Tommy got a hold of me and we went out to go and talk. I should have known right away what he wanted. I should have known that he really didn't care about me, it should have been etched in my memory that he only thought about himself. Finally, after beating around the bush, he asked for some money. Apparently, I owed him some, which isn't true. If anything he owes me. Its whatever now. I refused to give him money, so we then got into a fight. Some real cruel things were said, and what he said to me really hit me hard."
He had to give her credit for coming up with something so fast. It was obvious to him that she was lying. Considering that he had overheard Ted talking to Cody. John just decided to take her story for now and accept it. When the time was right, he would ask for the real story. It was apparent that she wouldn't tell him right now. She was scared, he knew that. It was better for him not to push. If he did push, then Evie would be at a further distance from him.
"If this guy comes around again, give me a call, I'll deal with him." John said. "Nobody hurts you and gets away with it."
"Thank," She stopped talking as a yawn escaped from her mouth, "you John."
Pushing the pillow aside, he quickly got up. He threw her a smile as they made their way towards the door. "Night Evie."
For reasons beyond her, she didn't want him to leave. When her mind wandered back to her conversation with Ted, she felt alone and scared. She didn't want to be alone. John filled the void of her being alone, and for once she felt at ease. For just a moment, he let her forget about what was really bothering her. Unintentionally of course.
What she didn't know was that John was thinking the same thing. He didn't want to leave her alone, he didn't want her to be alone. Any and every excuse to stay was running through his mind. It was on the tip of his tongue to say something, anything, but what? Then a realistic thought came to him, he couldn't stay. If anyone saw him leave or heard that he spent the night with her, then that would make them look bad. Her more so than him.
"Night John."
--
Late the next morning she quietly left the hotel to go home. After talking to Vince, she was able to get the next three days off. Meaning, she'll be back on the road by Monday.
Her thoughts relaxed when she got home. It felt good to be away from everyone. She really didn't need to be with anyone right now. This was her time to cool off, to forget about Ted.
She wanted to be alone, so she didn't even bother calling her family. Don't get her wrong, she loves her family, but she didn't want them around her. Her talk with Ted not only bothered her, it also exhausted her. Evie was never one to talk about her feelings. She'd hold everything inside and just let it sit there.
Her abortion had always been on her mind. However, to actually tell someone, and Ted no less, had added even more stress onto her.
Evie was brought out of her thoughts when her phone rang. Kristen's name was flashing across the screen. Sighing, she tossed her Blackberry aside. She decided long ago that she wasn't going to answer her phone. Besides, she was ignoring Kristen. She was only going to talk about Ted anyway, nothing interesting to Evie anymore.
The ringing of her phone hadn't persisted. Evie was growing annoyed. After the last call, she quickly shut the phone off. If she heard the phone ring one more time, she would have no choice but to throw it against the wall.
It never occurred to her that Kristen had her home phone number too. Would she ever quit? Evie would soon find out that she wouldn't. Now instead of her cell phone constantly ringing, it was her house phone. With each ring, Evie grew even more frustrated.
"God dammit Kristen, leave me the fuck alone!"
Unlike her cell phone, Evie couldn't turn off her house phone. While it did occur to her that she could just unplug it, she couldn't because then Kristen would know that she was home. So she did the next best thing. She picked up her ringing phone and shoved it in her kitchen drawer, thus muffling it.
Satisfied with herself, she sauntered upstairs to go take a short nap. Sleep alone would keep her mind off of things.
A few hours later, Evie was up and about. While she put her laundry to wash, she started to clean up around her house. Her house was generally clean, she just needed to dust and vacuum. She usually would have left well enough alone, but she wanted to keep her mind off of things. It seemed like no matter what she did, her mind wouldn't allow her to forget.
It was while she was taking her break, that she finally got the courage to turn her phone back on. The ringing of her phones had since stopped, so she figured it was safe.
When her phone turned on she saw that she had forty-eight missed calls. Forty-seven from Kristen. She rolled her eyes as she thought about how crazy her cousin was. But one lone missed phone call made her smile. It made her forget everything. That was the call from John.
She smiled, like an actual genuine smile. She liked John, although she wouldn't openly admit that to anyone. He was different from any other guy she had ever gone out with, or any other guy that she has ever met.
Her smile was still in place when she set the phone down on the coffee table. She made the decision to call him when she was done with everything. He could probably cheer her up, even after her fabricated story of why she was upset. It was sweet how the worry came across his face. He genuinely cared about her.
However, calling John would be the last of her worries. Instead, her current worry would be whoever was knocking on her door. Nobody knew she was home, so who would be at her front door? Confused, she walked over to the door and opened it. To her utter surprise it was Ted. Without saying anything she moved aside so that he could come in.
Closing the door behind her, she turned around so that she was facing him. She didn't quite understand why he was there. Come to think of it, how did he knew where she lived? Evie never mentioned to him where in Florida she lived.
"How do you know where I live?"
"Paul told me." Ted said as he sat down. "I was looking for you today and I couldn't find you. Finally, I was walking to my hotel room when I overheard Gail tell John that you went home."
"You still talk to Paul? My cousin Paul, Kristen's brother Paul." She said for reassurance. "Does she know that you guys are still friends?"
"She has no clue. If she knew that Paul was still friends with me, she'd go apeshit trying to get back together with me." Ted replied, getting annoyed by the topic of conversation. He didn't come to talk about his ex. "I'm surprised that she hasn't put you up to anything."
Evie sent him a weak smile. Without a word, she sat down on the couch next to him. She was hoping that he didn't sense anything. She suddenly felt uneasy. It was as if some of her intentions were written on her face for him to see.
"I guess I'll have to kill Paul now." Evie half joked. Paul knew that she hated Ted. So what would possess him to tell Ted where she lived. What right did he have?
Then thats when she realized that her family knew she was home. Thats why Kristen had called so many times. She inwardly groaned. It was only a matter time before her cousin had stormed up to her front door.
"You wouldn't kill Paul." Ted said glancing at her. "You love him like another brother."
While she knew that was true, Paul still knew her better than that. Sure all the reasons were unknown to everyone, but she still got her feelings through to everyone. At least she thought she did.
"Why are you here?"
"To talk."
"We've talked enough, don't you think?"
"We left things unresolved."
"There's nothing to resolve. In case you haven't noticed, we can't fix the past."
Ted sighed as he grabbed her hand. "I know that we can't fix the past. But we can fix us."
"There can't be an us."
"So I've heard. We can at least be friends. People like us can't ignore each other forever."
"What do you mean by people like us?"
"Evie, we have a history. Whether or not you want to admit it, we were bonded together when you got pregnant."
She untangled her hand from his. Taking a deep breath, she got up and started pacing the room. They stayed silent until Evie was able to get her thoughts together. She wanted to make him understand that this was the way things were supposed to be.
"I killed our baby Ted!" She shouted, tears silently falling down her cheeks. "We were never bonded together! Don't you understand that?"
"Stop throwing that in my face! It hurts me that you went through with an abortion. It breaks my heart."
"Oh and it doesn't hurt me! Ted, I've been carrying this secret around for eleven years. Nobody knows. I'm still hurt. Everyday I regret my decision, but I can't do anything. If I could, I would go back to that day and stop myself from doing it, but I can't. Now I have to live with the regret and shame."
Silence. Silence filled the room. No words were spoken. The only sound in the room were Evie's sobs.
When he couldn't take it anymore, Ted got up and walked over to her. Carefully, he wiped the tears away from her face. He couldn't stand to see her cry, he never could. Its just how he was. The idea of seeing her hurt killed him. It killed him even more to know that he was the cause of it.
"You went through a lot. Way more than I would be able to understand." Ted said as he lightly grabbed her by her shoulders, leaning down a little to look into her eyes. "I'm sorry for all of that. Its my fault that you had to do that. If anyone should feel regret and shame, its me. And don't think for one second that I don't. I do regret everything. Just like you hurt, I do too. All I want is for you to be in my life and for me to be in yours. I just want us to be friends, we still have a connection, the same one we had years ago. We can help each other and be happy."
She took in his words. Her gaze holding his. The words he was saying were sincere. It all showed in hie eyes. Years later, that still didn't change. His eyes still held the truth. All his thoughts, sincerities, and lies all showed in his eyes.
"I'm scared Ted." She whispered.
"You have no reason to be scared." He said pulling her into a hug.
They stood like that for the longest time. Silently, Ted held Evie close to him as she silently cried. On that day, an unsaid understanding was created.