Hey Guys! Let's get this over with...
I don't own Twilight. I am not Stephanie Meyer.
I wish no copyright infringments...
Big thanks to my girl TwilightMom505 for putting up with my inability to use comma correctly and being my beta anyway.
See ya on the other side!
~2007~
There is a resonating thud at the base of my skull that reminds me of the leaky faucet Charlie had out behind the garage last summer. The accompanying white-hot bullet of pain that joins each drip threatens to pull me back under the murky depths of unconsciousness. My brain struggles, and it is sluggish in its attempt to remember. As the silky pad of a thumb ghosts over the top of my knuckles, I can feel her nails pressing into the palm of my rough hand. Strawberries and Champagne fill the air, and every bone in my body sings the chorus to the melody her hand is creating. Fighting against the pain of the day and the terror of what awaits me; I succumb to the drip and slink back into the shadows.
Scrolling through a mental checklist of everything that we might have forgotten to pack, I sigh while holding the phone between my shoulder and my ear. I stumble around the bedroom and unplug cords because I know Bella will fuss that we were wasting energy and that we will have to pay for it next month. I try to distract myself, and the fact that I am on hold, by concentrating on filling my suitcase that Bella left lying open on the beige coverlet this morning. After a few attempts of packing things that I hate, she finally gave up and told me to pack my own clothes.
Knowing that she hates to fly, I created a playlist this morning with enough songs to keep her occupied. I walk to the computer and click the 'burn' button, and I watch as all of Bella's favorites start to transfer from the playlist, and the computer's drive begins to hum along. Making sure to grab a few 'toys' from our locked chest that sits on the dresser, I put everything in a black, velvet bag. The last thing I need is airport security to pull out 'Buzz,' Bella's favorite purple vibrator.
It isn't until I begin to pull the burned CD from the disc drive that a masculine voice filters through the phone.
"Mr. Cullen?"
Clearing my throat and pulling my hand back up to pull the phone off my shoulder and cradle it to my ear, I answer, "Yes?"
"I'm terribly sorry about that, sir. I did not mean to keep you on hold for so long," the B&B owner apologizes.
"I understand. I trust that everything is ok then?" I hope it is. I want this week to be perfect.
"Yes, sir. My wife just checked. The room is ready, and we will make sure to have the roses already spread on the bed and the candles lit when you get here tonight. We will already be retired for the evening, but our grandson is staying for the week and has agreed to check you in after-hours tonight."
I told them that we could stay in a hotel until morning because I didn't want to trouble them with our late arrival, but they both insisted it would be okay.
"The carriage from the tour company is scheduled to be here at 11:00 tomorrow. We have already confirmed with them all the stops that you requested."
I can't help but breathe a sigh of relief.
"Thank you so much Mr. Riley. I appreciate the time and hard work that you and your wife have put into our stay."
He chuckles through the line.
"It isn't a problem at all, Mr. Cullen. It isn't often we get many men that are willing to go to the lengths that you have to give their wife such a nice weekend."
My stomach flutters at the mention of Bella being my wife. My heart knows that one day she will be, and it always has, but I just can't find it in me to correct him right now.
"Well, either way, I will be recommending you to anyone who will listen."
It's true. Mr. Riley and his sweet wife, Katherine, have put up with my incessant phone calls and ridiculous demands all month.
"Well sir, we look forward to meeting you two tomorrow morning."
I thank him and hang up the phone.
Bella and I need this week away so much. Now that the racing season has come to a close, and the new sponsor isn't breathing down my neck, I feel like I can finally relax a little. At one point in time, my phone rang so often that I thought about getting a pair of walkie-talkies instead of a cell phone.
When Bella's break from school rolled around, it seemed like the perfect time to get away. She knows we are going out of town for the week, but she has no idea where. All I told her was to pack her suitcase and leave the rest to me.
She's always wanted to go to Savannah and see all the history there, and this week is going to be all about her. I know that she has been stressed out with school and the renovations on the house, so I'm going to cater to her every whim. I've scheduled tours to nearly every antebellum home and garden in the city, and we're staying at the most historical and beautiful B&B I could find online, The Kehoe House. She is going to love it. I even made sure to charge up the camera for her. She spends hours on the internet looking for ideas for our own little Victorian, so I'm sure that there will be plenty of things that she will want pictures of.
A shutter rips through me when I remember the 3 hours we spent at the local building supply looking through trim catalogs. Now, I love my girl, and I can't deny her anything, but we are talking about wood here.
Wood. Three hours of looking at wood. Yeah, it was a long-ass day.
Putting the CD in a case and grabbing the book from the nightstand on her side of the bed, I try to think if she will want anything else on the plane. When I'm satisfied with everything that I've packed, I start carrying bags out the front door.
Right about now, I'm glad that my girl is low maintenance. I don't even want to imagine the luggage Alice would have for a week away. As I'm packing the last bag out to throw in the trunk of the 'Vette, I make sure to pull the door hard and listen for the lock to click in place. I need to get that fixed...and painted. She wants some crazy red color, and I can't help but wonder what is wrong with plain old white.
Ah, chicks.
As I get into the car and shut my door, I stroke the steering wheel and smile. I can't believe I actually own a Corvette. I love her. I begged Mom and Dad for one when I got my license, but they both refused. Granted, I had just gotten a DUI, so I can't say that I blame them.
There was a time that I never thought that I would actually get one, but with Bella's urging and some sponsor money, I finally got her.
As I am pulling out onto the road, my phone rings and I see my girl's face light up the screen. Smiling and thinking about the seven different ways I plan to have her in just a few hours, I answer the phone.
"Hey, Beautiful."
I hear her giggle slightly and end it with a sigh.
"What's wrong?" I know my girl and her tells. She has something on her mind.
"Well, we may have to wait a couple hours before we leave. I know we were leaving early for the airport, and this will push us for time, but I really want to help Alex."
Shit.
Last year in the ill-fated trip to see Bella's mother, we didn't factor in how long it would take to navigate the airport. That fact alone was a huge consideration in why we are leaving 3 hours early for the flight.
We are going to have to run through the airport again, I just know it.
Not to mention the fact that this is going to mess up the schedule with The Kehoe House. Knowing she is looking as forward to this week as I am, I suppress my groan. I don't want her to feel guilty for trying to help.
"He has a test Monday, and he needs a little extra tutoring. I promise it won't take long. Maybe a couple of hours?"
Alex is an underprivileged kid that Bella had to tutor for a class. He's 14, a total pain in the ass, and he has the hots for my girl. At heart, he is a good kid, and I can't really fault him for having good taste in women. It's not like his piece of shit parents have been a good influence in his life, so I have to be glad he has Bella.
"I get it. I know he's important to you."
When the class ended, Bella just couldn't stand the thought that he wouldn't get any more help with school. She still tutors him a couple times a week. His parents can't afford to pay her, not that they would anyway, and God knows that they wouldn't help him themselves. I'm not sure either of them stay sober long enough to even spell their own names, let alone do algebra.
"Are you sure? I know you were looking forward to taking me to..." she draws out the end like a question.
"Oh no, you aren't getting it out of me that easy." I laugh.
"Can't blame a girl for trying."
Now, here is the thing about my girl... she says that she doesn't like surprises because she claims that she doesn't like to be unprepared.
What she is... is full of shit.
She loves surprises. Her eyes light up, and she does this little squealing laugh that is so cute.
"Emmett wanted me to run by the track earlier anyway, so I'll just go hang out there for a little bit, and you can call me when you get finished, okay?"
I lay the phone on my shoulder as I change directions, and I start down the road toward the track.
"Sounds good, baby. I can't wait for this weekend, you know?"
I can hear the smile and her voice, and I know we need this break. Between late nights in the garage for me and her inability to get finished working on school work before midnight, we don't get to spend much real time together.
"Me too. I packed a handkerchief to stuff in your mouth because I know everyone will get tired of hearing my name being screamed from our room."
"Edward!" She barks into the phone with a chuckle quickly following.
"Yeah, just like that." I can't help but tease her; although, there is some truth to it.
She giggles, "I love you, and I will talk to you soon."
"I love you, too. Bye."
Hanging up the phone, I pull into the lot at the track, and I see Emmett over by one of the tents. He wanted me to stop by so that I could check out something with one of the wiring harnesses.
I make my way over to him and pat him on the back.
"What's up?" I ask.
"What the hell are you doing here? I thought you and Bella were leaving?" He glances up at me and then goes back to taking apart some wires.
"She had to work with that kid she tutors. We're going to leave in a couple hours." I pick up a couple pieces, and Emmett smacks my hand.
"Hey!"
He jerks it away. "You ride like a God, but you can't fix a bike for shit, so stop."
I can't help but chuckle. "Then why did you want me to come over here?"
Emmett had called this morning, and I told him that we were leaving, so I couldn't come by the track.
He grins. "I was bored, and Jasper was busy."
"Oh, I see how it is!" I laugh and lean against the table.
Emmett points toward the parking lot, and he makes a motion toward my beauty.
"You got her broke in yet?"
Ever since I got Rhonda, that's what I named her; Emmett has given me shit about driving her like a grandma. It's not true, but it's not entirely a lie either.
"Rhonda is fine. She and I have had a good time; we are getting to know each other."
Emmett throws down the wires, and he begins to wipe his hands with a towel.
"Then stop being a pussy, and let's go see what she's got."
Before I can even object, Emmett is headed toward the car. Following behind him, I open the door and climb in. As I start the engine, I listen to her purr.
Throwing rocks as we pull out of the gravel lot, we make our way down the two-lane road.
Sitting hurts. Standing hurts. Breathing fucking hurts. All I can do is stare at him. The nurses keep telling me that I have to stay positive; that I need to keep the faith. I don't know how that is possible right now. All I want to do is close my eyes and disappear.
I've been sitting in this wheelchair for three weeks, and I wonder every second why God didn't just let me die.
I come here as soon as I wake up in the morning, and I wait for Emmett to come to. I remember the first time I looked in the mirror after I woke up. I could barely even recognize myself.
Emmett makes my condition look minor. I can't imagine what he will think when he sees himself. The three weeks have done him good though, and the bruises are starting to fade to yellow. The swelling is better too, and the doctors removed him from the medically-induced coma a few days ago.
There are tubes everywhere, all attached to machines that keep him alive. I can't imagine what Rosalie is going through. I haven't seen her.
In fact, I haven't seen anyone.
Every time someone comes, I refuse their visits. I don't want to look them in the eyes and face what I have done. Rose must hate me. If it were Bella...
A sob leaves my body at that thought. It could have been Bella. She could have been in that passenger's seat.
This is usually the point when the burn comes, and I can't breathe, so I'm not surprised as its tentacles spread through my chest.
As the sobs wrack my body, I recognize the hand of the nurse on my shoulder. This is as far as they let me get before they come in and wheel me back to my own little space of hell.
As the orderlies lift me back into my bed, I turn to look the other way. I can't stand to look at anyone. I can only imagine how they see me: a murderer. I know Emmett is still alive, but only time will tell if he is going to stay that way.
"Mr. Cullen, there a visitor to see you," the short, plump, elderly lady tells me.
I know it's her. It's always her. She comes every day. Sometimes, she comes more than once. No matter how many times I refuse to see her...she still comes.
That first night after I woke up, I could hear her screaming for me. She begged them to let her through. I nearly cracked. When I heard the sob leave her body as they told her that I refused to let her come in the room, I cried so hard that the nurse had to sedate me.
My body aches for her. My fingers itch to bury themselves in her hair, and my arms want to cradle her into my side. I have to fight myself to keep from screaming out for her.
There is a part of my brain that knows this was an accident, and that part says Bella wasn't in that car, and that she is ok. That part is screaming for me to just let her in the door. But that part of me is waging a war against the part that knows Bella was supposed to be in that car. It whispers in my ear that if it were Bella, she would be dead right now...and I would be responsible. It tells me that I would have killed her.
Just like I did my mother.
This is going to be a kind of long author's note, but hang in there with me, okay?
First of all, and most importantly, I want to extend my deepest sympathy to CaraNo and her family. She sent a beautiful angel to heaven this week and as a mother, my heart hurts for her. I also want to send the same sentiment to the families in Conn. who sent several angels to heaven as well. I read an article on MSN about the incredible staff there who put their lives on the line to save so many children. Those people deserve so much more than I can even comprehend. My heart hurts for those who lost their loved ones and children. It isn't fair. Plain and simple. I'm a God fearing christian and I want you all to know that my home and church is praying for you all.
My next bit of housekeeping is to apologize to my wonderful beta, TwilightMom505. She spent her time and used her wonderful talents to beta last chapter and I stupidly uploaded the wrong version, so all those mistakes were my own. So, I'm sorry, T! I made sure I uploaded the right one this time! (Nic, if you see this, don't yell at me for apologizing, I just wanted to make sure everyone knew no mistakes were hers! lol)
Finally, I hope you guys liked the EPOV. I felt like he needed a chance to defend himself. There were some teasers up in the FB Group, and I don't think anyone realized that they meant this would be EPOV. Gotcha! Expect a pic tease on Tuesday and a piece from the new chapter on Friday...see you soon and thanks for reading!