So, I wanted to update again today, based on all of the feedback I've been getting, so here's Chapter 3. Some of you may become frustrated with Meredith in this chapter and you should know that she frustrates me, too. She is an extremely hard character to write because my feelings are always fighting me when I write about her. I want her to be reckless and love Derek, but the goody two shoes side of me always fights her just giving in to him and risking everything. But enough of my ramblings.

Disclaimer: I don't not own these characters. Shonda does.

Please, enjoy and review. Constructive criticism is welcome and needed!

Chapter 3

Derek laid on the leather couch in his study, his arm over his face. Images of her swam in front of his eyes, as heat radiated from the place her delicate lips had caressed only hours before. Guilt washed over him, as the thought of Addison interrupted his delightful fantasies. He couldn't do this. He couldn't go about kissing Meredith and then watching her crash into the depths of the outcasts of society, just so he could satisfy his desires. He felt sick at the thought of marrying Addison, but he knew he had no choice. He hated the thought of going about his days, loving Meredith and watching her marry someone else and living a perfectly happy life, while he stood to the side, secretly loving and loathing her. He just couldn't do that. He stood up and refilled his glass of scotch, taking a generous swig of it. If he couldn't rid his heart of the problems that tormented it, he could at least numb it for a little while. He lay back down and stared at the ceiling, wishing things could be different, when the door swung open and slammed into the wall behind. The intimidating shadow of his father fell upon him and he squinted, his eyes unaccustomed to the bright light behind him. He strode in and towered over Derek, his face contorted with rage. He flung a paper at Derek, with more force then was needed. Derek picked it up, unfolded it and read the article that had his father in such a frenzy.

Last night, at the impressive ball put on by the Sheperd family, the announcement was made that the incredibly hansom and oh so eligible Derek Sheperd is due to marry the beautiful and not so innocent Addison Montgomery. But instead of the normal flirtation that occurs between most newly engaged couples, Mr. Sheperd was seen dancing most of the night with new-comer to the city, Meredith Grey. There may be trouble ahead for this wonder couple.

After Derek finished reading, he looked up at his father, confused as to what the actual problem was.

"Don't look at me like you have no idea how this make us look, you sorry excuse for a man! On the night your engagement is announced, you're seen getting cozy with this Meredith Grey person. Now, the whole city thinks you will be having some sort of an affair. And, what doesn't help kill these suspicions is the fact that you were seen embracing this woman this afternoon, in the middle of Central Park! Are you mad? Do you want this wedding called off?"

"More than you will ever know," Derek thought to himself, as his stomach sank more with every word his father said.

"Because Addison's father is threatening to call off the engagement once again. Is that what you want?"

"No, Father, that's not what I want. I was just welcoming Miss Grey to the city," Derek said as he stood up to face his father, eye to eye.

"And embracing her in the middle of Central Park is your idea of welcoming her?" William screamed.

"No, she was scared. She almost fell from the carriage. What was I going to do, just let her sit there petrified?"

"You shouldn't have been with her in the first place!"

"Father, I was just being friendly. She has no one here. Her mother and sister were killed in Boston and her father has been absent ever since."

"So, you felt it was your job to fill that absence," William snapped.

"No, I felt it was my job to offer some amount to kindness towards her," Derek hissed back.

"Enough! I don't want to hear anymore of your excuses! I forbid you from seeing Meredith Grey!"

"You can't do that!" Derek roared, his face growing red.

"If you want a roof over your head and food to eat, yes, I can," William replied, an evil smirk crossing his face, as the satisfaction of victory fell over him. Derek threw his glass into the roaring fire, grabbed his coat and stormed out of the room. William followed him out into the hall.

"And just where do you plan on going now?" he called after him.

"I don't know. I just need to get out of this house, clear my head," he yelled back over his shoulder.

"If you step out that door, I swear, you will not have a home to come back to when you return."

"I'll take my chances," Derek said as he walked out the door and slammed it behind him, leaving a fuming William behind. Derek walked through the unfeeling streets, his footsteps echoing off of the surrounding buildings. Rage ripped through him like a hundred bullets. He was tired of his father dictating his every move. He was a grown man; he had the right to control his own life. But he knew that if he wanted to have a job in the future, he needed to stay in his father's good favor. He clenched and unclenched his fists, wishing he had something he could throw, something to break. He wished he could follow what his heart was telling him, but knew that that was impossible. He had to live by what was proper and right, not by what he wanted. But images of Meredith soon entered his head and he didn't care whether or not he was proper. He wanted to spend time with her; he wanted to spend as much time as he possibly could with her, before he was tied down in a loveless marriage. He continued to walk through the dimly lit streets, until he came upon the Grey residence. He knew he shouldn't, but in that moment, he wanted nothing more than to climb up to Meredith's room and just hold her, both of them hoping that the world would come to a screeching halt and they could stay like that forever. He walked up to the gate and tried to open it with the least amount noise. A loud squeak pierced the night air, making Derek flinch. He saw a light brighten up the foyer and he ran down the sidewalk to the next residence and ducked down. A maid stuck her head out the door and looked around for a few moments. Once satisfied, she retreated and the light was extinguished soon after. Derek tiptoed back and slide around the gate. Remaining crouched over, he snuck along the side of the house, until he reached the trellis leaning next to Meredith's room. He looked up, realizing how crazy he really was, crazy for her. He grasped the trellis and started climbing, trying to not get his coat caught. He finally reached the balcony, swung himself up and tapped on the window. After standing there for several minutes, receiving no answer, he pressed on the window and found it unlatched. It swung open and he stepped gingerly inside. He looked around the plain room, but Meredith was nowhere to be found. He turned, as if to leave, but then decided to go find her. He needed to find her. He opened the door and skulked down the hallway, trying as hard as he could to avoid any creaking floor boards. He finally reached a door at the end of the hallway that was slightly ajar and he silently opened it. Meredith stood at the window, the moonlight toying at her hair, her sparsely dressed form bent over an elaborate telescope. He crept up behind her and snaked his arms around her waist. She gasped and swiftly spun around, her arms raised in a defensive position. Derek backed off.

"Whoa there. Don't hit me," he said cautiously.

"What are you doing here?" Meredith hissed, fury darkening her eyes.

"I wanted to see you," Derek replied, as he looked at her in her slightly transparent nightgown. Noticing his gaze, she crossed her arms over her chest.

"Well, I don't want to see you. I don't want you in my house in the middle of the night."

"What are you doing in here anyways?" Derek asked, as he looked around the room and realized it was a study, her father's study.

"I sneak in here on clear nights to use the telescope. My father doesn't approve of my schooling and forbids me to come in here, to get books or use the telescope… And why am I telling you this? Argh," she groaned, "What is wrong with me? You turn me into this blubbering idiot. It's like my head tells me to say one thing and then my mouth says something completely different, something completely ridiculous."

"You ramble."

"You sneak into my house and that's all you can say, 'you ramble.' I should wake up my father and have him call the police. You're trespassing."

"You don't really want to do that, do you?" Derek said, as he walked closer to Meredith.

"Yes, yes I believe I do," Meredith said, backing up until she was pressed against the wall.

"No, you don't," Derek stopped just inches from Meredith, his voice husky and his eyes a dark, stormy blue. He placed his hands on the wall on either side of Meredith and she squirmed under his gaze. Color rose to her checks, as her heart began to pound like an erratic drum. Derek stood there, gazing at her, breathing in her scent. It was some sort of flower, but what, he could not tell. Meredith ducked under his arm before he could stop her and crossed the room. But before she could take more than four steps, he grabbed her upper arms and pulled her back into him.

"Why must you torment me?" Derek breathed into her neck, sending shivers down her spine. She attempted to turn around, but he would not allow it. He placed his hands on her delicate abdomen. She pulled as hard as she could against him and he finally relented. She practically ran behind her father's desk, trying to keep some type of barrier between them.

"Please," she pleaded, "we can't do this. We can't do this and expect that we will both be able to pull back unscathed. Please!"

"Meredith, I don't care. I want to live the way my heart is telling me for once in my life, before I can't anymore. And right now, my heart is telling me that there is nothing more in the world that I want to do than be with you and love you with all of my heart."

"But Derek, if we do this, I'm the one that loses. I'm the one that falls for a man and then watches him get married to someone else. I'm the one that wonders what life would have been like if he hadn't had to get married. I'm the one that ends up alone and alienated from society. Please, don't ask me to do that. It is already hard enough right now, knowing that you will never be truly mine."

"Meredith, don't you want to live recklessly? Don't you want to live for love? Don't you want to satisfy those desires that leave you lying awake at night?" Meredith looked down at the floor with his last question, blood rushing to her checks. "Because I know I do and, if you'll let me, I want to do all of those things with… you." Derek wrung his hands and looked into Meredith's eyes, all of his raw emotions visible in them. Meredith stood staring at him for several moments, until she started to cautiously walk around the desk and up to Derek. She gently placed her hand on his chest, causing its rise and fall to become erratic.

"Yes, I do," she said quietly, as she lifted up on her tiptoes and placed a soft kiss on his lips. She pulled back slightly, so that their lips were just barely touching. "I want this," she breathed. Her lips then crashed onto his, their pent-up passion rushing out like a broken dam. He forced his tongue into her mouth, as she did the same to him, and they danced together. Derek then pulled back and attacked her neck, causing soft moans to spill from her body. He bit gently down on her earlobe, causing an even louder moan. She lifted her hands up and tangled her fingers in his hair, as his hands ran up and down her delicate curves. He then lifted her up and carried her over to the window seat. He laid her down gently and then pulled back. She gazed up at him and bit her lower lip, the picture of innocence.

"I can't do this to you," Derek whispered, as he straightened up and ran a hand through his dark hair. Meredith sat up, her eyes questioning him. "I can't ruin you."

"What happened? You certainly wanted this a few moments ago," she asked, a puzzled look on her face.

"I looked at you, really looked at you, and you looked so innocent. I don't want to ruin you."

"You won't. If anyone is going to ruin me, it's going to be me because I want this just as much as you do," Meredith said, as she grabbed hold of his jacket and pulled him down next to her. She leaned in and kissed his neck, as his hands found their way under her night gown and onto her thigh. His fingers traced patterns on her legs, causing thousands of goose bumps to rise. Their lips then met once again in a passionate kiss. Only when both of their air supplies were completely depleted did they finally pull apart.

"So, what were you looking at with your telescope?" Derek asked, breathless.

"The stars. They are very bright tonight."

"Will you show me?" Derek asked, a playful look in his eyes.

"Only if you promise to be good," Meredith teased, as she pecked him quickly on the lips.

"Of course I will," Derek said, as he lifted her up in his arms and spun her around, causing his favorite sound, her giggle, to resonate through the room. He set her back down at the telescope and she leaned down to readjust it. He placed his hands on her waist, startling her and causing her to knock the telescope completely off of its tripod. Meredith turned and hit Derek on the chest.

"Now look what you made me do! First, you make me talk like an idiot and now you make me clumsy. Pick it up!"

"Yes, ma'am," Derek said as he leaned down. As he straightened back up, he ran his hand up along her leg, lifting the night gown up as he went. He handed her the scope, which she shakily set back on its stand. She almost knocked it off again, as Derek kneeled down again and gently sucked on her ankle, then started kissing a trail up her leg. Her fingers wrapped in her hair and, as he neared her core, she pulled him back up to her.

"I can't let you have all of the fun, now can I," she said, as she licked her lips. Her lips attacked his and she pushed him back to the wall. They became blinded by their passion and made sweet, forbidden love in the light of the judging moon.

So, I'm not sure if this entry made this story rated M. If the rating does need to be changed, just tell me and I will change it.