Warning: Graphic violence and M-rated themes ahead. Please, no flames. If you don't like, don't read.
Mason marches Alex back to the cell and pushes her in. Alex catches herself on her knees, and when she looks up, three other woman are in her cell. They are tattooed like Mason and have their hair buzzed like hers.
Mason shoves her to the floor, turning her head to the side so that her left cheek is aimed toward the ceiling. Alex tries to fight them, but she is too tired and in too much pain to win. She sees a fourth woman enter the cell, carrying something she can barely see. Mason sits on her back and holds her head down with her forearm.
The woman sits in front of Alex and Alex sees a needle and a cup of what looks like ink. "Now pet, I am going to have you marked," Mason says with a lecherous smile. "You better not screw this up for Nicki here. Don't fight it."
Nicki slowly tattoos Alex's cheek. Alex wants to scream but fears what the women will do to her. The pain is excruciating, but finally it's over and the woman moves away. Mason doesn't move, though, still pressing her knee into Alex's back as she angles a small mirror to show Alex the new tattoo. A swastika.
Mason lets her up, and Alex starts to cry. She crawls away, not daring to get to her feet lest they push her down again. She curls up under the bed, trying to make herself as small as she can, to hide from the women.
She's broken. Olivia will never want her now, with this evilness marking her skin. "We'll get it removed," she says quietly in an attempt to comfort herself, but it doesn't help.
This day keeps getting worse. First she is taken from her love Olivia, and that was bad enough, but then she was molested by the guard, beaten, shaved and now tattooed. She has truly become the monster everyone sees, alone and surrounded by hate and fear.
Alex stays under the bed until the women leave and Mason leans down to meet Alex's eyes. "Get up, cunt. It's chow time and I'm not leaving you alone."
Alex doesn't want to leave the haven she's found under the bed. Her cheek is bleeding from the tattoo and her body is aching from the abuse and stress. But her owner drags her out from under the bed and hits her face, aggravating her tender cheek. Alex falls back onto the ground, whimpering.
"Now follow me, and answer me when I talk to you."
"Yes, Master," Alex whispers, ducking her head in shame as she follows Mason out of the cell.
Alex's head is pounding and her vision is blurry. They prison has yet to issue her glasses that can't be used as "weapons". She follows Mason closely and tries to avoid the gazes of the other women. She remembers the warning she was given when Mason first bought her – you belong to me and whoever I want to share you with. When will she start letting the other women around her? The threat fills Alex with fear, and she finds herself sticking close to Mason in the hopes that Mason won't let anyone else hurt her. Mason herself is bad enough, and Alex doesn't think she'll be able to handle any more pain.
Alex desperately wants to ask the guards for help but she knows they won't help her. It all started with them.
Alex instinctively grabs a tray, but Mason backhands her for what seems like the hundredth time today. "Did I say you could take one? You don't do anything unless you ask me and I let you. Do you want to eat?" When Alex nods, she says, "Then beg for it."
Alex won't beg, no matter how hungry she is. She just looks away, knowing if she glares at her owner, she will be beaten again.
Mason smirks. She still has fight in her, but I will fuck and beat that out of her.
"Fine. No food for you then." Mason pushes Alex to a table and shoves her to her knees. "Don't move an inch, pet."
Mason returns to the line for her dinner, and Alex takes a moment to look around at the other prisoners, trying not to lock eyes with them because she's afraid such a bold action might be seen as a threat. She sees a few of the women that had been brought in with her and auctioned off. A few have bruises and bumps but nowhere near as many as Alex.
The slam of Mason's tray gathers her attention. She glances at the food and is almost glad she passed on eating, although her stomach is twisting from hunger.
Her owner catches the look that flits across Alex's face. "Stop acting so high and mighty, bitch. You will eat this once you learn your place. And a fucking child rapist has no room to judge anyone here." Mason shovels food into her mouth, glaring at Alex, who nervously tugs on a loose thread on her shirt. She clenches her legs tightly so no one will know it's all she's wearing.
How can this have gotten so bad so quickly? God, where is Olivia? I need her so much. Please God, let this be a nightmare. She's already forgotten her promise to forget Olivia, and the letter she wrote asking Olivia to forget her. She's in too much pain for that.
Alex is surprised she has any tears left as she is dragged out of the cafeteria and back into the hellhole that is her new home.
Alex lies on the dank floor of her cell that night where Mason has forced her to sleep. She's shivering, and Mason won't give her any clothes or blankets to keep her warm. She's tried to cover herself with her hands, but it doesn't help much. Her whole body aches from the beatings she's received throughout the day, and she doesn't know how she's going to survive eight years of this. She'll die. Her heart aches for Olivia, and she feels horrible for feeling this way. She needs to let Olivia move on, let her be happy, instead of dwelling on what they could have had.
She feels like a child in desperate need of her mother's soothing touch, and tries to do for herself what she knows Olivia would do for her if she was here. She wishes she could run her fingers through her hair, but her beautiful hair is gone now, and the thought brings tears to her eyes again.
She tries to push the thought away and caresses her own cheek, but try as she may, she can't transform her own hands into Olivia's strong, warm ones. It's just her, stroking her own cheek, and not her love.
Finally, Alex lets her tears spill over. Although she tries to stay quiet about it, she can't quite stop the cries that seem to come almost of their own volition.
Mason kicks Alex in the ribs. "Shut up," she says, and Alex instinctively curls into herself, to protect her body from any more blows.
Alex presses her hands tightly over her mouth, trying to hold back her sobs. She wraps her arms around herself, trying to pretend that it's Olivia hugging her, soothing her, loving her.
"Olivia," she whispers, and once the words are out there, she can't stop herself from repeating them, over and over until they've melded into a mantra. "Olivia, Olivia, Olivia . . ."
Suddenly, Alex feels strong arms grasp hers and yank her to her feet. She can't help the whimper that escapes or the plea that slips past her lips. "Please –"
Mason smacks her across the face, and for a moment, Alex sees stars. "If you can't follow instructions, maybe you need a little incentive."
Alex shakes her head. After a day of pain and terror, she doesn't want to find out what Mason has planned for her. She's past the point of even trying to hide her fear.
Mason flips her over as if she's no more than a rag doll, her gaze lingering between Alex's legs. "Mm. Look at this," she says, smirking as she fingers the curls that rest there. "I think someone's wet for me."
Alex forces her body to be still, not wanting to earn another punishment by fighting back. She closes her eyes and prays for Mason to just rape her and get it over with.
Mason plays around Alex's entrance for a few moments. "You want me to touch you, don't you?"
Alex doesn't move.
"Beg me to fuck you."
Alex whimpers. "Please, Master," she says, her voice cracking. "Please f-fuck me, Master."
Mason grins. "No, I don't think so." She pulls her hands away. "Now shut up and go to sleep, whore."
Alex rolls onto her side, grateful that somehow she's escaped being raped, or so it would appear. Olivia, she says again, but it's only in her head. No one can take her memories of Olivia away from her, and she's glad.
"Liz, I have to see her. I have to know she's okay," Olivia says as she paces Liz's office, wringing her hands in desperation.
"Olivia, I'll go see her on Monday. That's the best I can do," Liz says quietly.
"That's three days away! I need to see her myself."
"I'm sorry, Olivia, but you can't. Not for several weeks, anyway. But I'll go see how she's doing." Liz catches Olivia's eye. "I'm sure she's fine," she says, but the words sound hollow even to her own ears.
"No, Liz. You know what happens in prisons, especially to child abusers." Olivia pushes away the thought of Alex in prison, being degraded and violated in ways she can't even fully comprehend, forcing herself for focus on Liz. "Alex didn't hurt Lauren Davis. You know that." Olivia's voice breaks. "She needs me, Liz, and I can't be there for her."
"Olivia, I assure you that Alexandra can take care of herself."
Olivia shakes her head. No, Alex can't take care of herself, at least not as well everyone thinks she can. Sure, that's the persona she tries to portray, but Olivia has seen her at her weakest. Rare as they were, Olivia had been there when Alex was at her most vulnerable, when she would wake up crying in the middle of the night, needing to be held and assured over and over again of Olivia's unconditional love for her, Olivia's warm embrace promising Alex without words that things would be okay.
She remembers the moments of intimacy between them. When they made love for the first time, and both of them cried afterward because neither could remember ever feeling so loved before. She remembers falling asleep with her Alex in her arms, and how secure Alex's presence always makes her feel. She remembers the hushed "I love you's", whispered every night before bed, between kisses while they made love, before they hung up the phone after every call. No one would ever know it to look at them, but Alex and Olivia are both romantics at heart.
She will never forget Alex. She couldn't if she tried, and she'll never stop fighting for her princess. "Liz, I need her." Olivia's voice cracks. She hates showing weakness, particularly to anyone that isn't Alex, but with Alex gone, so is a huge chunk of her soul. She needs her Alex back in her arms.
"Olivia, I promise I will do whatever I can to help Alexandra," Liz says.
Olivia takes a deep breath and nods. "I know you will. Please, Liz – tell her I still love her. Tell her I'll never forget her. I can't, Liz. I won't." She swallows hard. "Take care of her for me. Please."
Liz nods, too. "Of course."
The next morning, Mason wakes Alex with several well-placed kicks to her ribs, when Alex's eyes fly open and she instinctively curls to protect her ribcage, Mason yanks her to her feet. "Get up, cunt. It's time to shower."
Alex nods and reaches for her prison uniform, wanting to cover her body to preserve as much dignity as she can, but Mason knocks her hands away.
"Clothes are a privilege you'll have to earn, pet," she says with a sickly sweet smile. "Now come on." She holds a hand out to Alex, and this action, above all others, is the one that makes her want to cry. It's almost worse than the relentless beatings she endured yesterday.
She forces herself to take Mason's hand. Olivia. She has to think of Olivia. She pretends it's Olivia's soft, warm hand in hers, sending jolts of electricity up her spine at the contact. She remembers their first date, when Alex and Olivia want out for dinner and then for a long walk through Central Park, their hands intertwined. Olivia was such a gentleman, arriving with half a dozen roses when she came to pick Alex up, holding open doors for her, giving her a gallant bow and kissing her hand when she dropped Alex off. "We'll have to do this again sometime," she'd said, and Alex remembers the way her heart practically stopped as she tried to keep her voice from betraying her giddiness at the thought. "Absolutely," she'd said, and Olivia had kissed her hand once more before disappearing into the night.
Alex slept with her hand curled under her chin that night, inhaling the scent of Olivia's vanilla lip gloss and pretending Olivia was in bed beside her.
Alex is jolted back to Earth when they reach the showers. There's no privacy here, just an open area where all the women will wash themselves as the guards look on. They don't even try to pretend they're not enjoying themselves.
One of the correctional officers stops Alex by placing a meaty hand on her shoulder. "Where's your uniform?" he asks her.
Alex shudders and doesn't answer, turning slightly in an attempt to cover up her nakedness.
The guard turns her back to face him, letting his gaze rake over her breasts. "I asked you a question, bitch. Where's your uniform?"
"She didn't want to wear it this morning," Mason says. "I told her she had to or else she'd be punished, but she wouldn't listen."
Alex forces herself to bite her lip, although she wants to cry out that this absolutely isn't the case. She knows it won't do her any good. Once, she had faith in the system – was it only a month ago that she believed that prisons were truly the best place for offenders? She used to believe that people were truly good at heart, but her opinion is quickly starting to change.
The guard narrows his eyes at Alex. "Filthy whore." He shoves her toward the showers. "Go. You, too," he says to Mason.
Alex shivers as she stands beneath the cold spray, watching as Masson undresses. "What are you staring at, cunt?" Mason asks when she notices Alex staring, and Alex immediately drops her gaze. Her tattooed cheek burns as the water hits it, reminding her of her place. She's not Assistant District Attorney Alexandra Cabot anymore. She's not Alex, Olivia's princess and true love, anymore. She's Mason's property, nothing more.
Mason picks up a washcloth and lathers it with soap. "Come here. Better get you cleaned up for later. You're disgusting."
Alex wonders what's going to happen later, but she doesn't dare ask. She closes her eyes in humiliation as her owner starts to wash her and tries to think of Olivia. She remembers how they used to shower together, how Olivia would wash her, playfully but tenderly, delicately, as if Alex was too precious to mark, to mar, to break.
She tenses as Mason shoves a hand between her legs again, toying with her clit. Alex hisses; the sensation is more painful than anything, and Mason snickers. "You want me to fuck you, don't you, you whore?" she says, and Alex wonders vaguely if Mason simply enjoys the sound of these words and the fear they evoke, because Alex is fairly certain that Mason won't rape her here, right under the guards' noses.
Mason pinches her clit, and Alex tries to squeeze her legs together, but Mason forces them apart again. Alex doesn't think she's ever been so humiliated in her life, and she can't help the tears that rush to her eyes. She begs her body to be still, to recognize that it's not her love, Olivia, touching her, but her owner, Mason.
"No." The words slip past her lips almost of their own volition as Mason keeps playing with her clit, clearly trying to get a reaction, and Alex knows she's given Mason what she wants. The thought fills her with shame.
Mason smirks. "That feels good, doesn't it, pet?"
Alex shakes her head. "No. Please –"
Mason smacks her. "No, what?"
Alex whimpers. "No – no, Master."
"Do you want me to stop?"
"Yes, M-Master." Alex feels tears rush to her eyes. In just twenty-four hours, she's been reduced to this, begging for Mason not to rape her.
Mason pushes Alex to her knees. "Beg me, you whore."
Alex's tears start to fall unchecked now as she ducks her head and whispers, "Please, Master, don't hurt me."
"Mm. You beg so nicely, pet." Mason yanks her to her feet. "I want you to wash me. If you don't do it properly, you'll be punished."
Alex quickly gets to work, doing as instructed and washing Mason with the cloth.
The water turns off a moment later, and Alex steps out of the shower with Mason. A guard throws them towels, but Mason takes Alex's towel for herself and wraps it around her hair. She grabs Alex's hand again and half-drags her back to their cell.
Soaking wet, freezing, and filled with shame, Alex tries to hide her nude body from the other prisoners. She can't help the guilt that's coursing through her veins at letting so many others see her body in this way, especially after promising Olivia that she would be the only one to have that privilege. She knows now that it's futile.
When they get back to their cell, Mason strips off the towel she's wrapped around herself and picks up her prison uniform, starting to dress.
Alex ducks her head in shame. "May I please have some clothes?" Her face turns red, the blush spreading as she realizes that she's been relegated to this, begging to be allowed to dress.
"Excuse me?" Mason glares at Alex.
Alex realizes her mistake and forces herself to swallow her pride. "May I please have some clothes, Master?"
"You're going to have to earn them, pet. I already told you that. Are you ready to earn them?" Mason smirks.
Alex is just so tired, and in so much pain. She wants to fight and not give in, but her desire for clothes wins out. Bracing herself for whatever Mason will ask of her, Alex just nods. Her throat is tight and she can't push any words past her lips.
Mason decides that's good enough for now. There will be time later for begging. "Well, get to it." She parts her legs, displaying dark curls between her legs, still damp from the shower.
Alex swallows hard. "What?"
"I told you, you have to earn it. Now get those pretty lips and tongue of yours to work, cunt."
"No." Alex can't do that. She won't cheat on Olivia, even for clothes.
A sharp slap sends Alex to her knees. "You shouldn't tease me, pet. Now you have to be punished." Mason continues to rain blows upon her new property while Alex curls up in a ball, covering her head with her hands in an attempt to protect herself from the pain Mason is inflicting.
"Mason! Guards!" a woman's voice calls from another cell, and Mason quickly starts to dress, abandoning Alex.
Alex lies on the ground, her hands still over her head as she whimpers in pain. She tastes blood in her mouth from one of Mason's punches and tries to muffle her cries.
A guard approaches their cell. "Being a little rough, aren't you?" he says to Mason, glancing at Alex.
Mason shrugs. "Got to show them how the system works."
"Aren't you an angel. Cabot, you have a visit from your lawyer, but you don't seem to be in any condition to see her. Guess I'll have to tell her to come back. You're going to the hospital to get that lip looked at. Get up." The correctional officer pulls Alex to her feet. "Where's your uniform?"
Mason hands it to the guard, and he shoves it at Alex.
"Get dressed."
Alex glances at Mason, who just glares at her, and she shivers as she does as she's told. The guard snaps handcuffs onto her wrists and leads her out of the cell, away from her master.