The Blue Panty
"Dante, where the hell did this come from?" Lady yelled from the kitchen. Holding an oddly blue cloth, with a fork in front of her. Dante didn't open his eyes from where he laid on his sofa, but replied with a murmur.
"I don't know…"
Lady was use to this, so she did what any female would do. She shot the cloth through the air so it landed perfectly on Dante's face. Dante slowly took the cloth off his face and opened his eyes to inspect this 'lacy thing.'
'Hmm…" He said thoughtfully. Looking at it from all sides. He gave one last look of complete thoughtfulness and shot it at the ceiling fan. It hooked itself on one of the fans. Lady watched as a spectator from the kitchen. Dante opened his mouth…
Turned over and went back to his nap.
"Dante you're kidding me, right?" Lady yelled from the kitchen grabbing her head. She couldn't believe he still acts like a child. Seriously how much work does it take to learn a grown man manners.
Well apparently a lot!
"Man if you didn't owe me so much money I would have killed you a long time ago!"
Lady yelled. She was getting pissed off at this whole scene and at Dante's laid back attitude. He must have seriously thought he was the Queen of England.
"Good thing I owe you that money, eh?" Dante said from the couch. A vein popped out of her head as she stared at him in amazement. 'No need to get angry Lady' she told herself. There really was no need. Its Dante for peat sake not a real man with any real manners and that keeps his whore's lingerie in a box!
Lady took a deep breath and walked to the fan, swiftly she un-hooked the blue pant from the ceiling fan. She stood there for a moment and stared at the panty, then at Dante and back again.
A light bulb flashed above her head.
"Oh Dante I think the Pizza Guy is here." She said in a hurry-voice.
"I didn't order any pizza, but if its free. I'll take it." Dante said eyes still shut, but he turned from his sleeping position to look at Lady. Mostly to see if his prays were answered with free pizza.
Lady flew forward and stuffed his mouth with the blue panty. Dante's eyes flew open as he was totally unaware of what's in his mouth. Lady climbed on top of him and held his mouth shut.
"Oh you better enjoy this Dante Sparda, because it's the last time. I'm going to ask you a question politely!" Lady said holding his mouth tighter shut.
A muffled sound came from beneath her palms. "Oh is little Dante not liking the terrible smelly panty in your mouth?" Lady teased smiling.
Dante nodded immediately at her question. His arms were pinned beneath her knees. Yeah he is a demon slayer, womanizer and an all time bad ass. But Lady is a serious threat, seriously. I'm not joking.
"Well too bad!" Lady said grinning like an idiot. This really made her day!
"Sorry," A voice said coming from the door, "But are you the owners of Devil May Cry?"
Lady's head snapped up. She jumped off Dante and said in a well mannered voice.
"Well yes we are." Lady stretched her hand out for the man before her, he took it smiling.
Dante sat up and spit out the awful blue panty. It landed next to Lady's foot covered in saliva. "I'm the owner, but who wants to know?" Dante said in his normal life threatening voice. He wiped his mouth with his sleeve and made his way to the man at the door.
The man was shaking. The stories he heard of the Son of Sparda, must have been true.
"I'm Michael Camelot." The man held his hand out to Dante. Dante chuckled.
"Seriously? You surnames Camelot?" Dante started laughing.
Lady elbowed him in the gut. Dante only gave a slight 'ouhmf' as her elbow connected to his stomach.
"What is your business Mr Camelot?" Lady asked. Dante went back to his chuckle fits. It's really not that funny, but who am I kidding. Were talking about Dante!
"You won't believe me if I told you." The man said.
Dante straightened up and said in a more business like tone,
"Try us."