By the way I have a Deviantart account in case you want to check up on me. My journals will have news on my fanfics in case you're interested. You can look up Santa Made A Mistake This Year and the first story you see will have been done by me. My username is Whatamitoyou
It's hard to believe that everyone just... abandoned me. I was a heart broken middle schooler who was stuck heading out to a new place with a boy I hated. The only person who didn't abandon me. My eyes widened at that. I had forgotten. He was there in middle school and high school! If he sticks with me in college then he's the only one who didn't leave me. Gaara stayed when I was broken, everyone else stayed when I was fine and fun. It's cruel but at the same time I'm grateful that I at least don't hate one person.
I was currently sitting on a bench at the center of the campus. My eyes were closed and facing the sky while the wind brushed cherry blossom petals over my skin. It felt nice and lonely but I like the loneliness I had in high school better. At least then I knew that the loneliness was simpler. I didn't have anyone and so that was an obvious reason. The only person I had just didn't try too hard around me, he didn't try to show me that he cared.
"You look just lonely enough to throw away." A voice said softly making her open her eyes and turn to Sasori. He was standing off to the side, under the cherry tree as well while smiling softly over at her. It made me sit up and stare at him with parted lips, not sure what to do. He walked over and held out his hand. "Care for me to take your troubles away?" He whispered making my eyes narrow.
"No." I growled and looked away knowing that he was my first boyfriend. The first one I loved and the first one who broke my heart. He cheated on me with a slut. He was in middle school and I was a fifth grader. When I got into middle school I dated two more guys. Both broke my heart, both threw me away. I'm not in the mood to talk to the man who started this heartless tradition, even if he's attempting to act kind and win me over.
"Aw... how cruel are you?" He asked with a light laugh then sat down beside me while looking up at the crystal blue sky with calm rolling clouds that were gliding from place to place. Everything about it showed a calm summer's day. That's exactly what he needs and wants right now. It's what he's always needed and wanted from what I know from past experiences.
"I'm pretty damn cruel." I smirked lightly and then did my best to keep my angry face on, but for some reason he's always able to melt my anger away. He held onto my hand tightly in his own and then he hugged me. It was more like pulling me into him. It was comforting though and felt nice which is good.
"You're just cruel enough." He murmured and then moved away and headed over to the outskirts of the campus making me sigh and glare. He's such a jerk sometimes. Coming by and distracting me from my own self pity and misery. Then he walks off after comforting me just to have it all come rushing back. I almost shouted a couple curses at him but instead I just glared and closed my eyes once more.
Soon I fell into a deep sleep and everything seemed calm, I was just waiting for my phone to buzz and let me know that I have a class. The sun was warming my skin, it had started at my front but was slowly heading toward the back. That just made my frown deepen. That's when someone else sat down beside me. I didn't bother to open my eyes, knowing it'd be Sasori. His presence felt slightly different but the passion was the same. "Jerk." I grumbled.
"That's a rather rude thing to say." A voice said with a light smirk in his tone making my eyes open wide in complete and total shock. Sasuke was sitting there smirking at me with a look on his face that said 'You're a freak but whatever... you're my freak' and it made me smile.
"I'm always rude." I retorted and held his hand tightly in mine. He squeezed and then kissed the top of my head while I closed my eyes trying to relax.
"Why are you trying to get hurt?" Sasuke asked making me glance over at him. He's making no sense. I'm not supposed to get hurt when I'm with him. I'm supposed to be safe and normal when I'm with him. There are supposed to be no walls, nothing to hide, and he's supposed to protect me!
Wait... did I get it wrong again...? "Too many expectations..." Sasuke murmured into my ear and stood up, but didn't offer his hand as he looked down at me. "Since when did you need someone else to feel whole?" He asked in a pitying voice. I glared up at him then stood as well.
"When I lost myself in sixth grade. If middle school never happened... I might not have lost myself." I hissed and then walked over to my dorm and slammed the door. No one was there which meant I could go back to my little black notebook with all my evil plans. It kept me safe, whole, and just fine. It makes sure that I can pretend to smile, pretend to spazz, and pretend to be me. I can't wait to throw it off and show everyone... what I actually became.