Hi. So here's chapter 5 and let me tell you it was hard to write!... Some of you are saying that you don't like this Sookie 'cause she left Eric. Others, tell me you think Eric is moving on too quicky. So I must ask for your pacience... Keep reading and let me know what you think, ok? As before, i thank BloodSucker815 for her help betaing this. Oh, and again: the characters aren't mine... I wish they were; but they are not! ~Célia

Sookie "Livin' on a Prayer"

I woke up that morning and felt that I couldn't breathe. My head started spinning and I then recognised the symptoms from my last visit to Fangtasia almost two months before. It was a panic attack so I forced myself to be calm. It was Eric. Or rather: it was Eric's absence. And in that second, I realised that I couldn't feel him. I couldn't fell the bond.

Ten minutes later I was still trying to calm myself while I wondered what had happened to him. I made up my mind and I decided to contact Pam. I would call Eric instead; but I never got his cell phone number. Somehow, I always ended up calling Fangtasia when I needed to speak to him. And when he stayed at Gran's house, he didn't have a cell phone. So I settled on calling Pam – she had given me her cell phone number when I moved to Tennessee.

I knew it was daytime and she was dead but I called her nonetheless and I left a voice message: "Pam, hey, it's Sookie. Listen: can you feel Eric? Can you? Please tell me you can fell him and everything is alright. Please call me the second you wake up, will you? The second you wake up. Thanks".

I ended the call and stared at my cell phone for a while. And then I thanked God that it was Monday and the restaurant was closed and I started praying that Eric wasn't dead. Finally dead.

I could still remember my Gran's words when the vampires came out of the coffin "I don't think that God would have any problems with a vampire as long as he is a good person." And then I prayed even harder for her words to be true and for God to keep Eric free from harm. Deep in my heart I knew that I wouldn't forgive myself if Eric had found his death in Europe. So I just kept praying and asking God for Eric's well-being.

As soon as it was dark my phone rang, and I heard that my prayers were answered.

"Hey Sookie." Pam´s voice sounded normal.

"Is Eric okay Pam? I can´t feel him. Is he okay?" My voice, on the other hand, couldn't have been more anxious.

"Calm down Sookie. Eric is alright. I heard from him yesterday. He called me to tell me that he's extending his vacations in Europe. Again. And I'm pissed. He's there taking it easy and having a good time and I'm left here with all the work. It isn't fair."

"Yesterday? But what if he met the sun this morning? Do you think he's okay? Can you fell him Pam? Can you feel him now? At this very moment?"

"Yes Sookie, I can. The thing is..."

"Well, I can't. Please Pam, please, grab your cell and call him again and listen to his voice. Is it possible that something happened to him and you didn't feel? Is it? Please Pam, call him and listen to his voice, okay? Or better yet, give me his number and I'll call. Please, give me his cell phone number. What if something happened and you didn't feel? Is it possible? Just call him. Please Pam, please." I realised then that I was talking in warp speed but I was sure that Pam understood me in spite of that.

"No, I'm pretty sure I'd feel it."

"But I couldn't feel him today. All day. Please can you just give me his cell phone number and I'll..."

"Stop Sookie. Calm down." She interrupted me. "That was what I was trying to tell you. He is okay. Nothing happened. And I can still feel him."

"Didn't you listen?" The fact that she was still calm was really bothering me. "I told you that I can't feel him Pam. I can't feel him. Is it possible that something happened to him and you didn't feel? Is it? Is it?" I couldn't figure the reason behind Pam's reaction. Or her non-reaction. Eric was his maker. I was sure she should care more about him. She should be worried. Why was she reacting like she didn't care? Oh my God. Maybe Pam knew that Eric was finally dead but she didn't want to tell me that for some crazy reason. But why? Why? I really needed to be sure. I had to try to contact Eric. I suddenly felt the huge size of my mistake. I should never have left Louisiana. I should never have left Eric. I... I... I had to try to contact him. "Please Pam. Give me his telephone number. I just have to talk to him. I beg you."

"Sookie, stop." She interrupted me again. "As I was saying: he's okay. I can still feel him. He just closed his bond to you. That's why you can't feel him".

What? He did what?

"Ohh... But how? Why? I thought that only the passage of time would weaken the bond. And that ours was as strong as you can get..." My words were much slower and my voice was much lower than before.

"Yes, that's true. Except for really old vampires. And Eric is definitively old and he most likely has been drinking his 2000 year old maker's blood to help him closing the bond. That's the how. As far as the why he did it is concerned... Well, I don't know. Your guess is as good as mine. Well, scrap that, your guess is probably much better than mine."

He closed the bond. He closed the bond? Suddenly, I was feeling that I couldn't breathe again. But somehow I managed to answer.

"Ahh... Thanks for telling me. I'm sorry to have you calling me in such a hurry." My voice was even lower now, almost a whisper.

"It's alright my telepathic friend. And how are you tonight?"

"Happier now that I know that Eric is fine. So, I'm alright." I was not. I was feeling awful. I had to end the call and have a few minutes think about all this. Eric closed the bond. He actually closed the bond. "Look Pam, I have to go. Call me in a few weeks?"

"Sure. Be well Sookie"

"You too Pam."

I went to the kitchen and start making something to eat because I hadn't left my bedroom the whole day. I had just stayed there praying.

A cheese and ham grilled sandwich later, I was still thinking about Pam's words and their meaning. Eric deliberately met his maker in Europe so he could help him close the bond he shared with me. I felt terribly sad, naked and empty inside. But at the same time, I was relieved that he was okay and I understood that he was only giving me the space I asked. "I need space from you." This was my fault. This was my entire fault. I had made a terrible mistake and now I was paying for it.

Without really thinking, in an almost zombie-like trance, I cleaned the kitchen and then went to take a shower. I was drying my hair when I told myself in the mirror: "He's alright, he's alive and he's in Europe living his life. And that's what you wanted and it is time for you to do the same. Carry on with your life. Make it work." My mirror image nodded her head and I smiled to her. She smiled at me back. And in that moment, with the hair dryer in my hand, I decided to accept my new boss' invite for dinner and a movie on the following Sunday.

Ok. I did it. I (well, with Ocella's help) broke their bond. Any thoughts? And what about the "dinner and a movie" with the new boss? Is it too soon? Will she be able to date someone else? Do you want to see them both getting over this relationship? Or do you think that bond or no bond eric and sookie belong together?

"Livin' on a Prayer" is Bon Jovi's third single from their Slippery When Wet album. "Ohh! We're half way there. Oh-oh. Livin' on a prayer! Take my hand and we'll make it
I swear! Oh-oh! Livin' on a prayer. Livin' on a prayer." :)