CH 6: Kyrie Eleison

Alana sat staring blankly ahead at the wall, not even responding when Dr. Lecter placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Alana," he gently coaxed, "how are you feeling?"

She gave a bitter laugh. "You'll have to forgive me, Doctor, but I'm not exactly in the mood to be psychoanalyzed right now."

"I assure you, I am merely asking as a friend." Lightly retracting his hand, he stared down at her miserable expression and added, "If I were to psychoanalyze you, I would be expecting a considerable fee."

Alana cracked a weak smile at that. "Thanks, you're such a charmer." Wiping at her eyes (even though they were dry), she released a breath and leaned back in her seat. "What about you? How are you handling this?"

"Will is my friend – I am handling things the way one would expect."

Alana's mouth lifted in a disbelieving curve. "Yeah? Are you expected to be remarkably calm?"

"I cannot help the way I emote – if it displeases you, I apologize."

"No, no, of course not... We all handle grief differently." Absently fiddling with the hem of her skirt, her voice was soft and full of defeat as she confessed, "You were right, you know...about my feelings for Will."

"Oh?"

She nodded. "It's just so hard to accept what happened, because I might've been able to stop it. If I'd only paid more attention..."

"Dreaming of the past is pointless, Alana."

"I know," she whispered, "I know, but... Oh, Hannibal, I feel so badly for Abigail. She's my patient, so I can't help but feel responsible."

Lecter's face was blank as he touched her back. "Abigail would not wish you to feel this way – you know as well as I how detrimental it is to dwell on what cannot be changed."

In a rare moment of weakness, Alana looked up at him with unshed tears in her eyes. "Yes...I know. But what I also know is I need a friend right now, so if you don't mind...? That is, if you're willing...?"

"Of course I will be here, Alana," Lecter gently assured her. "In spite of our recent friction, I do consider you a friend. I would be honored to lend my emotional support."

"Thank you," Alana whispered. When she reached out to squeeze his hand, he surprised her by taking her into his arms. Feeling a lump in her throat, she returned the embrace and rested her head against his chest, her eyes tightly closing as she willed out the horrors in her mind. She knew what was coming from the police – she knew what fate Will would suffer – and she hated to admit she felt relief now that Hannibal would be there. She'd especially need him during the impending trial.

As Lecter rested his chin in her hair, Alana looked up and saw Jack Crawford walk past the door. She knew Will's capture was imminent.

Abigail continued to sit in the car with her knees drawn up to her chest, her expression blank and bored as Will got into the car and sat beside her. "So what's the damage?"

"Tow truck's on its way," he promised.

"Yeah? And what about the clerk?"

"What about him?"

"Didn't he seem kinda...off to you?"

Will's brow puckered and he shook his head. "No, not really... He's actually the one who offered to call the truck."

"Oh." Expression unconvinced, Abigail hugged her knees more tightly and said, "He was totally giving us the evil eye when we tried to leave – I think he knows."

"Well if he does, that's completely on you. It wasn't necessary to keep touching me like that."

Abigail sneered. "Well can I help it that you're so damn touchable?" Leaning over and poking Will's ribs, she laughed as he squirmed and tried to avoid her prodding fingers.

"Cut that out," he warned.

"Why? Afraid you'll get turned on and the old man will see?"

Face coloring, Will glared off to the side as she cupped his cheeks.

"C'mon, let's make-out."

"Are you kidding me right now? Someone might see us..."

Abigail's eyes sparkled mischievously. "I know – that's what makes it so hot." As she leaned in to kiss him, the telltale sound of large, relentless raindrops began to pelt the car from all sides.

"Great," Will muttered. "On top of a non-starting engine, we've now got a bunch of wet clothes in our future."

Abigail smiled and rested her head on his shoulder. "So what? Rain's kind of romantic." Tracing her fingers along the back of his hand, her smile widened as she whispered, "This should totally be our first date."

Will laughed at that. "A date? Well, I certainly can't remember the last time I've been on one of those..."

"At this rate, the same will go for me." Interlocking their fingers, Abigail curled her legs up beneath her and sighed. "I never thought it was possible to be this happy... Even when things were fine with my family, I never felt this good inside."

Will released a shaky breath. "I...I don't want to talk about your family."

"Of course you don't – I'm sorry," Abigail mumbled. With the down-pouring rain reflecting in her eyes, she placed a hand on his chest and whispered, "I know you hate him for being my first, but I hope you'll be my last. I love you, Will."

He looked at her sharply then, for no woman had said those words since his mother left. Was she lying? Was she trying to make him feel better?

Seemingly aware of Will's inability to trust – especially when said trust involved himself – Abigail gripped his hands and forced him to return her gaze. "Will, I mean it… I hate to get all gushy on you, but you've helped me in more ways than you could ever know."

His bottom lip trembled. In that moment, his soul was warm and full. He'd never thought it possible to ever feel that way again.

Wordlessly, he pulled her into his lap and pressed his forehead to hers, his hands cupping her cheeks as he felt her sweet breath on his face.

"Is this your way of saying I'm a keeper?" she teased.

Smiling up at her pleased expression, Will nodded and softly agreed, "Yeah... I think I'll keep you around for a while."

Joining his lips urgently with hers, he slid his hands over Abigail's rump and arched their hips together. He suddenly didn't care if the clerk saw.

When Crawford finally found Beverly Katz, he was overcome by the grief in her down-turned face. "Zeller said you weren't handling the news very well – do you want to talk about it?"

"No," she whispered. Though she hadn't been crying, her voice sounded strained and small. "Will made his choice...what else is there to discuss?"

"Plenty," Crawford fired back. Now moving to sit beside her, he studied her sullen profile and frowned. "None of us could've seen this coming, Agent Katz. I hope you're not blaming yourself for what happened."

Beverly gave a dry, unfeeling laugh. "I told him to follow his heart – I told him to stick it to everyone and do what he wanted, and then this happens? You're damn right, I'm blaming myself!"

Crawford winced. "Will's darker side was a surprise to all of us, so really, Katz, I understand. And more importantly, I'll understand if you don't want to be involved when we finally nab him."

"I need to be there," she insisted. "I need to look him in the eye and see that he did it. I need to be sure that he's guilty."

"We're already pretty sure of his guilt," Crawford said. "The clerk reported his findings earlier this morning, and now we're just waiting on a positive ID. He said he'd take a look once we arrive."

Beverly sniffed and looked away. "Right, well...I guess that's life. You always try and prepare yourself for the future, but no matter what you do, in the long run there'll always be something that...that just completely floors you."

In an uncharacteristic moment of compassion, Crawford put a hand on Beverly's shoulder and gave it a light squeeze. "Meet me in the parking lot in five minutes," he urged. "The team and I are heading out shortly."

After Crawford left the room and the door swung shut, Beverly Katz had her first meltdown since her sister committed murder.

It was soon midday, and there was still no sign of the tow truck. Eyes closing sleepily, Will felt Abigail's arms tighten around his waist and he smiled, resting his cheek in her hair as the rain continued to steadily beat against the windshield.

"Will?"

"Hmm?"

"Do you think you'll always be in my life?"

He paused, his brow puckering as he stroked her back. "I hope so," he finally whispered. By this point he thought – no, he knew he needed Abigail by his side, for the thought of being without her was astoundingly horrific. Losing her would surely break him.

He heard Abigail sigh, then her hand came over his as her lips brushed against his ear. "I hope so, too," she whispered back.

Will smiled and pulled her into his lap for a proper embrace. As he kissed her forehead, he sensed the bobbing of headlights and jerked when he realized they were no longer alone. Turning to glance out the window, he pressed a hand against the glass and watched Crawford's car come into view. Behind him, three other police vehicles rolled to a gravelly stop.

"Oh, shit," Abigail whispered. "Will, what are we going to do?"

"Just stay quiet," he urged. Trying his best to remain calm, he exhaled and observed Crawford draw nearer. He motioned for Will to unroll his window.

"Don't do it," Abigail begged. "Please, Will, just lock the doors – they're going to keep us from being together!"

Will gripped her hand and softly apologized, "I'm sorry, Abby, but it's too late for that now... If they really want to get in this car, they'll find a way." He heard her make a noise of protest, but he rolled down his window and peered out at Crawford. "Uhh…afternoon, Jack."

"Will, I need you to step out of the car, please."

He paused, then gave him an uneasy smile. "Is this about Abigail? Because I promise you, she wanted to come... We're just out celebrating her birthday."

Crawford exchanged glances with the men flanking his sides. Beverly was milling in the background, appearing uncomfortable and anxious.

"What?" Will pressed. He couldn't understand why they were all looking at him so queerly.

Finally, Crawford had had just about enough. "Will, I'm only going to ask you this once more: get out of the car."

Will caught Beverly's pained gaze then, but she immediately looked away. What was the matter with her? Did she really think him so horrible now that she knew the truth?

Unable to stand the tension, Will finally opened the car door and gave a cry when two strong, beefy cops slammed him down against the hood. "Wait, what's going on here? I didn't do anything wrong!"

"Will..."

"Tell them, Abby! Tell them!"

Panicked, he gazed at Abigail through the windshield and struggled more forcefully. "Please, Abby...tell them what happened!"

"Will, Abigail Hobbs is dead!"

It suddenly felt as if a large, freezing bucket of ice water had been dumped over his person. Frozen to the spot, Will's lips flapped soundlessly before he finally managed to choke out, "I...what?"

Crawford's voice was much softer this time as he said, "She's dead, Will – we're getting the body now."

Managing to wrestle free of the policemen, Will frantically began gesturing to his car. "Abigail's here, Jack! Look at her! She can't be inside!" When his eyes met with where he was pointing, he gave a sharp gasp when he realized the car was empty.

Abigail Hobbs was gone.

"No," he whispered. "No, no, no, no, this isn't happening...this isn't real! Abigail is alive!"

As Crawford shook his head, Beverly turned away and placed a hand over her mouth.

"C'mon, Jack, you know me...I would never hurt her. She was...she's my..." Trailing off, a sudden wave of nausea overtook him when he recalled the clerk's odd reaction to the blood on his cheek. Could that have been...?

No. Abigail had scratched him in a nightmare, not real life. He was positive that he'd nicked himself while shaving.

The sudden jarring, squeaky noise of rattling wheels startled Will to attention and he paled, the breath stripping from his lungs when he saw the coroner wheeling a body from a motel room.

"Abigail!" he cried. "Abby, wait!"

Racing over to the cart before he could be stopped, Will shoved the coroner off to the side and tore at the body bag. With quivering hands, he unzipped the plastic casing and sobbed along with his movements.

"Will, stop!"

Ignoring Crawford, Will pushed the covering aside, but was apprehended just as a soft, pale face came into view. The girl's eyes were blue and full of fear.

"Abby!" he screamed. "Abby!" Feeling his knees give out, he collapsed just as the cops began dragging him away from the body.

"She loved me," he moaned. "She said she loved me!"

"Will, calm down..."

"NO!"

Eyes wild and frantic, he shivered and shook as they forced him into one of the police cars. With handcuffs freshly placed around his wrists, Will bowed his head and choked on a sob. "She loved me," he woefully repeated over and over again. "She loved me..."

As the cops shut the door, Beverly turned to Crawford and tried to remain neutral.

"Well?" he softly asked. "Did you get your proof?"

With her lips quivering, Beverly nodded and gave a pained, "Yes... It's just...I never thought it'd be this hard."

"Losing a brilliant mind is always hard."

Running a finger along her lips, she nodded in agreement and asked, "What now?"

"I suspect Chilton will take Graham on as a patient – he's always wanted to study his mind, so now he'll get the chance." Crawford's tone was hushed and indignant as he spoke these words. There was no question that Will would be fought over like a piece of meat. As much as he hated physicians and their questions, he now had no choice but to answer to them for the rest of his life.

As Beverly turned to leave, he called after her retreating back, "Agent Katz?"

"Yes, sir?"

"Go ahead and take the rest of the week off."

Despite the fact she knew she should be grateful, Beverly couldn't even crack a smile as she nodded and got into her car.

Will had been under Dr. Frederick Chilton's watchful eye for two months now, and there was still no immediate sign of improvement. In Will's first month, he'd babbled, rarely ate, slept, or drank, and would often call out to Abigail and carry on conversations with the deceased.

Every now and then Will had spoken to the staff – albeit simple, trivial remarks – and hope had momentarily arisen. Only now? Chilton was beginning to doubt Will would ever recover. He'd seemed fine up until about a week ago. When an orderly had read Will an anonymous letter, the former agent had screamed and rocked and cried before falling into a catatonic state. Even now, Chilton still couldn't understand the meaning behind the message.

Gazing down at said note in frustration, Chilton unfolded the dog-eared page and went over the eloquent lines one last time:

Dear Will:

It's a cold and primitive world we live in, is it not? Our ravenous, blood-stained jaws snap at the throats of our competition – even at the throats of those we love most.

Tell me: did it hurt to see your lady love on the cold slab? To touch her lifeless lips and realize they will never again rest upon yours? Or maybe, just maybe, it had felt good to see her cloaked in the shroud of death. It had felt GOOD to kill her and keep anyone else from deciding her expiration. No...not even God was allowed to determine Abigail's fate. You saw to that. It was your last thoughtful, undying gift to her for bringing you so much happiness. By ending her existence, you made her immortal. It's all really quite brilliant. My highest congratulations and/or condolences.

I only have one question more for you, dear Will: when you studied the bodies I slayed, did you realize my value? My self-worth? Did you discover that the same coarse, animalistic blood runs through our very veins? As much as you may wish to deny it, we are the same, Will, and the proof is in the blood on your hands. You see, we didn't kill those people – we saved them.

In the matter of your stay with that bumbling, second rate fool of a doctor, I wish you a speedy convalescence so that we may continue these chats (despite any reservations you may have on such matters). I believe your first words were 'You won't like me when I'm psychoanalyzed'? Such charm and cheek all at once. I should've known we'd be compatriots right from the very start.

Devotedly Yours,

A Dear and Empathetic Friend

A/N: Well, that's it! I know I'm probably going to get some flack for it, but honestly, I'd been planning this ending ever since chapter two. And in light of Will's EXTREME descent on the show (wasn't expecting that!), I guess I just got lucky since it could happen. Ultimately, in this story Will just wanted a companion. He's very lonely, so it kind of hurt for me to write him imagining the "I love you." Of course, in my head-canon Abigail DOES love him in this story, but she never got a chance to tell him the truth.

In the matter of the letter, I hope it seemed ok since I was relying heavily on book!Lecter instead of TV!Lecter. I've been re-reading Silence of the Lambs, and the man is just FANTASTIC in that book. So if Lecter seems detached from the scene, that might be why (he only had a type of detached respect for Will, and never even knew Abigail in the novels). Originally, I'd wanted to include this line:

P.S. I need not exact revenge for Abigail's death, for I know your own madness will pull you under. Your mind is quite beautiful in that respect.

Buuuut, I ultimately decided to forego that line. I thought it made the note a bit cluttered. Hopefully it was the right decision!

A couple people asked me why the clerk reacted so strongly to Will in the last chapter. I suppose nobody has any questions about that anymore, but think of it this way: Will was saying things like "How much do WE owe you?", and putting his arm around air. That'd freak anyone out, I think. Also, when the clerk noticed the scratch from Abigail's nails, and how the poor girl was clearly missing from the scene, he managed to put two and two together and called the police.

On another note, I also ship Will x Beverly and Hannibal x Alana, so I gave those pairings a bit of fodder, too (couldn't help myself). I'm currently working on two WillKatz fics, as well as an Abigill one-shot. The words aren't really flowing on that one, so I might need to take a break and come back to it. This fandom's feeding my inspiration, and I'm so happy to be involved in it.

You all have been WONDERFUL, and I really, truly enjoy hearing from you. Every review is like an early Christmas present (which is also coincidentally my birthday), and it just lights up my entire day. I especially want to thank those of you who've been with me right from the very start. I love you all! And I hope you enjoyed, despite the not-so-happy ending! I'll have to rectify that with my one-shot. ;)

Also, I post my fanfic updates, as well as my Abigill and WillKatz fan art on my Tumblr, so if you'd like to follow me, you can add my made-in-the-80s URL. :) I'll also be making an Abigill and WillKatz fan vid, so you can add me on YouTube as KendraLuehr. Maybe I'll see some of you there!