The Final Trial of Michael Kelso

They called him The King and the king he was. The crowned king of all ignorance and selfishness that plagued the rest of his friends. Yet they had grown used to his constant shallow and quite frankly useless demeanor, but not I. I had known exactly who he was the very first time I had set my eyes upon him. What with those movie-star good looks you would have thought he'd go somewhere in life. Yet he had rotted down to his core with his spoiled over-confidence and the half-brain he had told him everything was okay. Eric had been right to blame the dim-witted fool... it was his fault they were all going to die. Which is why Michael Kelso was going first.

Kelso's reassurance to everyone was that he was a cop and if anything bad happened then he'd be able to save them. But he was pretty useless without a gun and a flashlight; though he wasn't about to tell his friends that. Fez seemed to depend on his lawful authority as they quietly walked through the first level of the house in silence.

The oldest man of the group noted that Fez's courageous personality had died down as soon as they stepped foot into the home. Now he seemed to be shaking in his shoes and had turned three shades lighter out of fear as they tip-toed over the creaky floorboards.

"So where do we want to look?" Kelso finally asked, causing his best friend to jump in surprise. Fez laughed nervously and shrugged his shoulders with his eyes shifting from side to side as if he was looking for something.

"Let's go to the kitchen!" Fez finally chirped, then plastered a smile across his face. Kelso shrugged his shoulders and lead the way to the vacant kitchen. His nerves begin to kick in when noting the crimson colored walls and dark gray tile on the floor. He wondered why someone would want to have such a morbid looking house and finally decided that the people who used to live here were witches.

Kelso slammed the door to the cupboard shut as the dim lightbulb in his mind flickered momentarily. Bouncing up from his crouched position, a grin spread across his face.

"Fez! I got it!" He cried as his body wriggled with excitement. When Fez turned to him, Kelso continued. "The people who lived here were witches! Maybe we can find their stuff! Like-"

"A flying broom!" Fez interrupted as an amazed beam began to lift the corners of his lips. Kelso nodded vigorously and bounced on his heel impatiently for Fez to crawl out of the cupboard he had been investigating in. He could hear the shuffling of his legs and soft thuds as his friend turned his body to exit the large drawer. As if to tell Fez to hurry up, Kelso slammed his curled fist onto the counter top and sighed loudly. Which was countered by a shrill scream from Fez.

The twenty-one year old clambered out from under the sink and was squirming violently as if possessed by the devil. Kelso's jaw dropped when seeing a large hairy spider on his shoulder and cried out in surprise. Fez was hitting himself and spinning in circles to try to brush off the disgustingly huge arachnid. Kelso's eyes fell upon a wooden broom and quickly dashed to the opposite side of the kitchen; his feet slid on the sparkling linoleum as he did so. Raising the broom handle, he charged toward Fez and quickly ordered his hollering friend to turn around so he could brush off the spider. Yet instead of using the bristles to wipe it off of his shoulders, Kelso began to lower the broom repeatedly, like a hammer- for his amusement. He pinched his eyes closed and turned his head while he softly hit Fez's back over and over with the broom. He hadn't meant to hurt his friend, only find some entertainment for both of them; he figured Fez would laugh about it when they got home the next morning.

Kelso slowly opened one eye and turned his head. His lip trembled as he stared at the sink that Fez had been leaning against. But... Fez wasn't there. Kelso whimpered and dropped the handle to the broom; it came crashing down upon the floor with a loud thud.

"Fez?" The twenty-two year old called out with a trembling smile etched on his face. "I was just kidding... you can come out now," he whimpered nervously. He stood in the silent kitchen, waiting to hear a giggle or growl from his annoyed friend. But after what seemed like hours passed, there was no one but him in the entire house it seemed. It was too quiet, too creepy, and he wanted to go home. But first he had to find Fez.

'He couldn't have gone far,' Kelso told himself as he began to walk out of the kitchen. He gulped deep breaths to try and calm himself as he crept into the living room. His eyes caught sight of a roaring fire in the fire place and he grinned.

"Fez, nice clue! I think I'm getting warmer!" Kelso chuckled at his word play then quickly scampered through the dark room towards the two bedrooms on the lower floor. Fez would be the one to try to scare him and end up jumping on one of the beds; Kelso knew that.

But what Michael didn't know was that it wasn't a trick. It wasn't some clue that his closest friend had left for him. It was me and I had been sitting silently in the chair less than a foot away from him. But his naive self hadn't bothered to look around, his ignorance bled through him almost as much as the blood that would soon soak through his shirt.

Kelso peeked his head into the first bedroom and smelled a light scent- like laundry soap. He sighed with relief after finding a room that didn't make him feel like he was choking on his breath and took a step in the white painted room. This had to be where Fez went.

His police officer instincts took over his immature mind and he started focusing on every little detail. He stared closely at the white sheets on the bed to see if he could see any indentations from a foot, or if he was lucky a foot print from the dust that layered the floor.

"The dust!" Kelso cried, spinning around to make sure his hypothesis was correct- and it was. He beamed smugly as he could finally tell his friends that his first inference as a cop had proved to be right. The layer of dust on the floor had created his foot prints throughout the room. So if his foot prints were visible, so were Fez's.

Kelso high-tailed it out of the room and fell to the ground; he couldn't see anything in the dark standing up. He began to crawl to the next room, his eyes lowered at the floor where the faintest of prints had been left. But before he opened the door to the second bedroom, a loud thump was heard from upstairs that caught his attention.

He craned his neck as he stared up the spiral staircase in curiosity. Kelso waited and waited to hear another thump, or any other signs that someone was upstairs. But he knew there were people there- Eric and Donna and Hyde and... Jackie.

"I got it!" Kelso cried as he heard a muffled giggle from upstairs. "Man Hyde is smart!" Kelso smirked as he hopped onto his feet and quickly climbed up the steps two at a time. His feet tripped as he reached the first landing, yet his hand quickly groped for the railing and he caught himself. Kelso decided to take the stairs slower now in case he did fall- he didn't want to end up breaking his leg.

As he reached the second floor, Kelso leaned against the railing and waited to hear anymore signs of life. He heard light foot steps pound on the hard wood floors so close to him.

"Fez?" He must have also heard the couple as they began one of their many love fests. Kelso jogged quickly to the hallway and looked down; there was no one there. The police officer grimaced and sighed softly.

'Should I look for Fez, or Jackie and Hyde?' Kelso asked himself and furrowed his brow.

There went his childish mind. One answer would prove his safety while the other would bring him to meet his fate- the end of his life that I would cause. It was his choice to make- carry on childish antics or face his mature duty as a man and as a police officer. It was his choice; to live or to die.

Kelso weighed the pros and cons of each. If he found Fez he wouldn't be alone and he could apologize for attacking him with the broom. They could leave the house and go find a restaurant or a movie theater or something. Then they could steal the wallet Eric always left in his car and scrounge enough money to buy a motel room and sleep there until the next day and come back as if they hadn't left at all.

But if he found Jackie and Hyde doing it- he could burn them so badly. He could either take their clothes or scare them or... or something. Of course, Hyde would be angry and would probably beat the crap out of him later but it would be totally worth it. Besides, if Fez heard them going at it like rabbits in the springtime he probably went to see if he could get a peep of the show; he was a perv!

He decided his best option was to find the happy couple in the midst of their own search and find. Kelso cupped his hand and placed it behind his ear- a tactic he had learned a long time ago that would help him hear better. Silently his feet crept forward as he listened for the slightest sound of movement, of anything. And finally he heard it- a very quiet moan.

Grinning toothily, Kelso ran down the hallway and listened to figure out which room they would be in. He pressed his ears to each door and listened for as long as five minutes, or it felt that way at least... he was never really good with time. By the third door on the opposite side of the hallway, he felt dejection begin to consume him. He couldn't find them and he couldn't find- his thoughts were interrupted as he heard quiet giggles and a low moan- from a guy. That had to be them!

Kelso's hand hovered over the door knob and it shook with the childish excitement that hadn't left his body since his witch theory. His witch theory... which he had abandoned because he didn't have Fez with him. But Fez would be in the room- he was a master at sneaking into rooms.

"Eric!" Kelso's jaw dropped and his eyes nearly bugged out of his sockets as he heard the name that had been cried. He shuddered in disgust and waved his hands in the air as he fought to maintain his composure. He was about to walk in on Eric and Donna having sex! The thought of that utterly repulsed him- they were like the old parents of the group and after hearing Eric talk about their lame romantic endeavors Kelso knew it would be just like walking in on his parents doing the deed and that sickened him. And he knew Fez wouldn't be in there either, they had talked about it. Fez had once said that he wouldn't watch Eric and Donna because "while Donna is gorgeous the thought of a scrawny little dude on top of her made him feel sick."

'So where the hell is Fez? And Hyde and Jackie?' He knew the couple and his friend weren't up here. All of the rooms he had checked were silent and that was a sure sign they weren't "doing anything." The many times the gang had walked into the basement while Hyde and Jackie were in the throes of their romance he knew at least Jackie couldn't stay that quiet. 'Maybe they left! Jackie was scared earlier!' Kelso assumed and sighed heavily.

After figuring out where Jackie and Hyde went, he knew Fez wouldn't have gone without him. So his search to find his partner in crime was back in session.

"Fez? I'm sorry for hitting you... will you please come back out?" Kelso called as he trampled down the stairs once more. Each step he took down the stairs seemed to shake the old house and he sighed shakily. As he jumped onto the ground floor, the hairs on the back of his neck stood in apprehension.

It seemed darker. He wasn't sure what had happened since he had been upstairs, but he felt this odd sense of fear. Like someone had taken a needle and syringe and injected him with a heavy dosage of fear. Kelso could feel goose pimples raise on his arms and he shivered before rubbing his bare skin on his lower arms. It didn't help that the air seemed heavier than before either and a putrid smell of strong copper nearly stung his nose.

"Fez, come on out so we can go, okay? I'm really getting scared."

Michael Kelso admitted he was scared. Another childish move that wouldn't help secure his feeble future. One more step in the wrong direction would send him into my web, into my clutches where I would rip him apart. I would skin him alive to make him see what was really on the inside of him. The truth hurts. This was the final trial of Michael Kelso, and he was about to lose it all.

Kelso's ears perked at a sudden thud heard from the bedroom he hadn't entered in the first floor. On the tips of his toes, Kelso silently walked to the door and grinned. He should have checked there first, of course Fez would be in there.

The gavel rang loudly, declaring his final jurisdiction. Death. He ran right into my web and he was mine to feed upon. He was mine to hold as he bled to death in my arms, mine to scream as loudly as he could though his efforts at rescue would fall on deaf ears. Michael Kelso was mine. And I waited for the perfect moment to strike, to sink my teeth into the flawless flesh he claimed he possessed.

Kelso turned the handle of the door and pulled it open. He coughed as the heavy copper odor filled his nostrils and he peered at the floor. Fez couldn't be in there because there were no footsteps. Raising his eyes, he felt his breath hitch in the back of his throat and his eyes widened in terror.

"Th-that's..." he trailed off, staring in disgust at the thick and dark liquid that wasn't just splattered on the white sheets. It soaked through ever corner of the top blanket and dripped in a large puddle on the wood floor. His stomach flipped and he covered his mouth with his hand as he fought off the nauseous waves.

Tainted. The room was tainted with the innocence he had spoiled long ago. This was a reflection of his pig-headed antics as a teen and young adult. The blood of his innocence stained the room, splattered across the walls, and seemed to choke him.

He didn't know why he did it. He knew that he should have just ran out of the room and to the front door where he could run and call the police. But he was the police! But he heard that thump again. And again. And again. Slowly, his neck turned to face his side and he felt a loud scream stick in the back of his throat.

Kelso backed against the wall but became paralyzed with the strongest sense of fear he had ever felt. He couldn't tear his eyes away from the silhouette that was so familiar to him that was right... there. He watched as the heel of the shoe hit the wall as the rest of the body swayed from the rope it hung from. He felt his throat burn with acid as he stared at the large hole that had once been a stomach... the insides were scattered across the floor like discarded clothes. And the vacant eyes of death were wide open and staring at him as if calling for him. To help, to run, to-

A cold hand pressed firmly on the back of his neck and Kelso screamed as loud as he could. Yet his shriek was unheard as a ball of cloth that reeked of the copper... of blood and a strong chemical filled his airways and he could feel himself slipping, slipping to a surreal oblivion. But that cold hand travelled down his back and lifted his KISS shirt. His final efforts to scream as a razor sharp blade sank through the soft flesh of his mid-back were unheard as he fell to the floor.

Michael Christopher Kelso-
Guilty Conscience. Guilty Heart. Guilty Thoughts.
Guilty.
Breathes No more.

After all... he was a means to an end.

...

I sat in front of the roaring fire, wiping my hands of the blood that I had shed. The blood that had tainted the souls of his friends, of his family, of himself and of me. How could I feel bad for what I had done when I had paid everyone a favor that they had asked for? He was a means to and end and he was in my way and finally I could move on to my next target.

I held the blood-covered knife in my hands and I grinned. Raising my right arm, I threw the blade as hard as I could- the sound of it stabbing the wall and shaking to a stop were all I needed to hear. I have good aim- just like him. A laugh escaped my lips as I ran my thumb across the wax figurine in my hands and I sighed happily. Glancing up at the now still knife, my eyes fell upon the name that had been written in the blood of The King.

"Oops," I giggle, tossing the wax figure into the fire melting away as the blood dripped slowly down the wall, like tears. And many tears would be shed upon hearing of the death of this underdog hero.

Eric Albert Forman was everyone's favorite boy and I despised him for that. And everyone would love him more as his perfect blood was spilled from his perfect body. Eric Albert Forman was mine. Fun Time is really over.