AN/ Hi everybody, sorry for keeping you waiting so long for this chapter...

First I wanna say thank you to all of you who reviewed on the last chapter. There were so many that it would fill this author's note if I did a shout out, but I want you to know that every single one of your reviews means A LOT to me:)

This chapter is written from Mark's pov and was really fun but also challenging for me to write, but I think it turned out good in the end. It will give you some information about what's going on inside of his head.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Kickin it.

Chapter 17

Me, Myself and I

Mark's pov.

Most of the road was covered in darkness and there weren't much traffic anymore. We had left the city and for every mile we'd put behind us the calmer I got. I was still not at ease though. Had I gotten everything with us that we would need, until it was safe for us to go back? Going through an invisible check-list inside of my head I could with relief state that I most likely had.

I wondered if someone was already searching the house though. The thought made my heart rate speed up slightly. I kept telling myself that everything was okay and I was just worrying over nothing, in an attempt to calm myself down. It didn't work too well though as Alan kept popping up in my head. What if he'd done something that would make it impossible for us to ever go back?

I'm not lying when I say that I had been absolutely terrified when I came back and noticed the blood on my hands. Dreading the worst I had rushed down the stairs to the basement. I think my heart stopped as I found the boy all alone, crying his heart out.

"Where's your friend?" I asked worriedly.

"You…" He started but seemed unable to continue. Taking a few deep breaths he looked at me with such rage that I would've probably run of if he hadn't been restrained and was unable to do anything. "I hate you." He said sincerely. I didn't need to hear more to put things together. Without hesitation I hurried back up again, getting two suitcases and a backpack. I practically threw in everything that came to my mind that we would need. It was mostly clothes and food, along with my medicines, cash and some other stuff that happened to be in my way, leaving Alan's cigarettes behind on purpose. I've always hated it when he smokes. It makes my throat sore.

When I was about to get outside to put the suitcases in my car I noticed a light green cardigan lying in the hallway. I picked it up, inspecting it. I was positive that it belonged to the girl that had been there just minutes earlier. There were bloodstains on it, which only made me even more worried.

"Relax, everything's fine." Alan reassured in his usual, arrogant way. "I've taken care of everything."

"Where's the girl?" I asked.

"Outside." Alan answered casually. "Oh by the way… we should probably bring that thing with us." He said, referring to the knitted piece of clothing I held in my hands.

I nodded and stuffed the cardigan into my backpack, before heading out to the car with the suitcases. Once inside again I threw the backpack over my shoulder, picked up a small rag and made my way down to the basement.

The boy eyed me anxiously as I approached him.

"What's going on?" He asked worriedly, fresh tears trailing down his cheeks.

"We're leaving." I answered simply as I attempted to gag him. He dodged though.

"Please don't." He shook his head and it took me a moment before I managed to shove it in his mouth, ignoring his pleads. If I wouldn't gag him, he would most likely scream for help once we're outside. I just couldn't risk that. After rearranging the handcuffs so that he would be able to walk on his own, I pulled a bag over his head, just in case.

He was much more cooperative than I'd expected him to be and it didn't take long until we were on our way…

I took a look through the rear view mirror, before turning to the right. The road here was much smaller and almost empty from other vehicles, just the way I liked it…

I tried to concentrate on driving but the blond girl kept popping up in my head. What had happened to her? I had searched the house without any results. And after a quick look around the yard I could state that she wasn't there either. The blood and Alan refusing to tell me what had happened, really worried me. Not to mention the boy's seemingly unstoppable tears. Everything pointed towards one thing- Alan had killed her…with my body…which meant that I was a murderer… I shook the thought out of my head. No I wasn't a murderer… was I?

I hadn't found any body yet. For all I knew there was still a possibility that she was alive…right?

If that was the case, she either got away or Alan hid her somewhere… My head was cramped with what felt like a thousand thoughts that just wouldn't go away. I wasn't gonna sleep well tonight, that's for sure…

The woods around us were deep. Turning left into a very narrow road, more like a path actually, we made our way further into the darkness…into safety…

After a couple of miles along the bumpy path, we finally reached our destination. The small cabin along with the outside shed was completely covered in darkness.

I stopped the car and got out. The silence in the air made me relax a bit. We were safe here, for now at least… I think…

"What are you so worried about, dad?" My beloved daughter's sweet voice, chimed in my ears.

"It's nothing my dear." I reassured her. "Don't worry about it. Let's just get inside."

The boy felt calmer than before as I pulled him out of the trunk and guided him inside. Switching the light on, I scanned the room. There was a small cleared space next to the bed that would do as a 'storage place' for the boy. Once there I picked up the chain between his ankles with my foot. He didn't seem to notice, before I gave him a hard push in the back, while at the same time jerking back at the chain with my foot. The boy fell instantly, crying out as he hit the floor. His cries were muffled though, thanks to the gag.

"Dad, please let me have a look at him." Tess said with enthusiasm.

"Sure" I mumbled, not really paying any attention to her.

"Can you please remove the bag then?" She said a little annoyed.

"Oh yeah…sorry Tess." I apologized as I pulled the bag off of the boy's head. "Welcome to your new home." I muttered, looking at him. His face was slightly red and he breathed heavily. The many tear streaks that trailed down his face only reminded me about our current situation. I inhaled a shaky breath as I went to unpack and settle down, since it looks like we're going to stay here for a while.

"What happened to her, Alan? The girl, I mean." I asked as I fumbled to get the fridge to work. He didn't answer me though. "Where is she? Is she still at my place?" I could sense he didn't like my choice of words. "Sorry… our place." I corrected myself. "Well… is she?"

"Just relax already." Alan said, clearly annoyed. "I told you, I've got everything under control."

"No you haven't" I shook my head. "None of us have. I've got to find her. If the police get to her before we do, we're doomed." My heart started racing as I realized that if she lived she would easily be able to identify me.

"Dad, can I talk to Jack?"

"Not now Tess. I'm busy." I said.

"But dad…" She tried again, only managing to stress me out even more. And of course Alan noticed.

"Maybe it's better for you to retreat for a while." He said soothingly to me. I sighed, perhaps he was right.

"Can I talk to Jack then?" Tess asked hopefully, seeing her chance.

"I guess so…" I answered, immediately feeling Alan getting anxious.

"I don't know if that's such a good idea Mark." He said. "The boy can't be trusted. You can't leave her alone with him."

"Well technically, she won't be alone." I said. "You'll be watching her, right?" I swear I could feel him rolling his eyes at me.

"Fine." He said reluctantly. "But don't come and say I didn't warn ya."

"Yay!" I could hear Tess exclaim, as I retreated back to my comfort zone, shutting the rest of the world out. Leaving all my worries behind, I was finally able to relax in my own safe paradise…

When I came back my throat was dry and a terrible itchy feeling was spreading through it. I coughed, which I almost immediately regretted as that only teased my airways, making me cough even harder. The smell that hung in the air around me filled me in on what was going on. I quickly released the cigarette I was holding crushing it against the pavement. I hated when Alan did this to me…

Taking in my surroundings I realized I was at a gas station not too far from the hunting cabin. In my left hand I was holding a bag with some newly bought items. With a quick glance down into the bag, I could tell that Alan hadn't exactly bought the stuff I would've. There were a pack of cigarettes, two candy bars and a magazine with some dirty content. I sighed looking at the recite. At least he'd gassed up… I brought out a couple of mint pastilles from my pocket and shoved them into my mouth to get rid of the awful taste that the cigarette had caused. For a moment I thought about going back and buy some supplies that we would actually need, but the boy came to my mind and I hurried of towards my car, worried Alan might had done something to him in the time I've been away.

The cabin was much easier to locate this time as a dim light shined through its windows. I practically jumped out of my car and rushed over to the door. Bursting through it, I found to my relief the boy still laying on the floor were I'd left him. His back was facing the wall and his head was pointing towards the bed. He had buried his face in the green cardigan that Alan had wanted us to bring. At first I wondered if he was asleep, but the small sounds of his sobs and sniffles quickly gave me the answer though. The fact that he was awake worried me a little as I noticed his arms weren't secured behind his back anymore, but I calmed down when I saw that his wrists were still cuffed together, which would give me an advantaged if he decides to try to fight me. I've seen this kid in action and that's nothing you wanna go up against…

He didn't seem to notice me as I changed into my pyjama. Strangely enough I wasn't hungry even though I hadn't eaten since lunch. Figuring Alan must've taken care of that for me, I climbed into my bed and pretty soon I was drifting of to sleep to the faint sounds of the boy crying...

The bright sunlight that filled the room, made me squint my eyes as I started to wake up. To my surprise I had slept unusually well and it took a moment before I recalled what had happened yesterday. I rolled over looking down at the floor next to the bed. The boy was still there, lying perfectly still using the cardigan as a pillow. I had to check a little closer to make sure that he breathed. As I did so I noticed that he was awake already, his eyes fixed on the opposite wall.

"Morning." I muttered sitting up. He shot me a glance without moving his head or the rest of his body. "Had a good night's sleep?" I asked in a cheerful way, trying to lightning up the mood. He watched me carefully as I got out of bed, but remained silent. In the corner of his eyes there was what looked like tears. Was he still crying?

After getting dressed I went over to the small kitchen area to make us some breakfast. While fiddling around with the frying pan and setting the table, I noticed the boy starting to move as he slowly and hesitatingly sat up. Resting his back against the wall, he brought the girls sweeter to his chest, holding it tightly as he eyed me carefully. I paid him no greater attention though as I fried the eggs.

Whistling to myself I put the food on my plate and poured the coffee into my cup. Satisfied with the breakfast I'd prepared for myself I sat down and started eating. The silence was interrupted by a loud growl from the boy's stomach. I looked over at him, making him cringe slightly.

"You want some?" I smiled in amusement by his reaction. He was obviously intimidated by me, which was good, because as long as he feared me, I didn't have to fear him…

He gave me no answer, but he hadn't eaten in 36 hours, so I figured he must be starving. I put together some bacon and an egg along with a bun of bread on a plate for him, before pouring up a glass of juice to him as well. He tensed as I approached him, but I ignored it and put the meal on the floor next to him. For a moment I didn't think he was gonna eat any of it, as he just stared at it, not moving a muscle.

"It's okay." I said. "We still want to keep you alive, so you better eat… preferably before he comes back, since he most likely wouldn't approve of me giving you this." I added when I saw he wasn't going to eat any time soon. I wasn't completely sure either if feeding him was such a good idea though. We needed to keep him in somewhat poor condition to be able to hold him here. But then again we really needed to keep him alive for Tess's sake, besides he was in irons, so he couldn't do that much, right?

I retreated back to the table to finish my breakfast. The boy slowly started to eat his meal a little awkwardly due to the handcuffs that was restricting his movements. After a few mouthfuls he quickened up his pace though and pretty soon he was practically throwing the food into his mouth.

"Take it easy there, kid." I warned. "…if you don't want it to come back up again." He gave me a quick glance before slowing down to a more normal pace. None of us uttered a single word for the rest of the breakfast.

The boy had cleared his plate and was now back to puttering around with the girls sweater in his hands. Stroking the fabric with his thumb, he stared at it.

I started to do the dishes, almost forgetting about the plate that the boy had used. Reminded by it I went over to him, picking it up.

"Why do you hate me?" He asked quietly, startling me as I hadn't expected him to speak. Still keeping his gaze on the green piece of clothing he was holding. I watched him in silence for a moment, not really knowing what to say.

"I don't." I said simply. Even though his head was tilted forward and I could barely see his face, I still noticed a tear that got stuck in his eyelashes. I rolled my eyes. When was this kid ever gonna stop…?

"Then why did you do this to me?" He wondered. There wasn't any anger in his voice, like you would've expect, only sadness. Swallowing he tried to suppress the tears that threatened to fall. I cocked my head to the side, studying him, as I thought about his question. A faint feeling of guilt went through me. I never meant to hurt him, really. All I wanted was to make my little girl happy. I wanted her to love me and to have her close. Somehow in my naïve mind I had thought that the boy was the key to get all of that. I'd never thought of the consequences. Alan wasn't supposed to ever show up, let alone do whatever it was that he'd done. Everything's just got way out of my hands.

"I didn't do it." He spoke up again shaking his head slightly, before looking at me. His eyes were screaming for someone to help him, to understand him. "I didn't kill anyone."

"Never thought you did." I shook my head, wondering what he was talking about.

"Then why did you kill Kim?" I could see that it pained him to utter those words as he waited for my reply. I was unable to give him any answer though as the question had hit me like a rock to my head. Alan had actually killed her. I looked down at my hands. The hands of a murderer…

It was all too much for me to take in and I could feel him taking over me again. Inhaling deeply I turned away from the boy to put the dishes by the sink. My hands were shaking, causing the porcelain to rattle as I put it away.

I needed to get back and find the girl somehow, and I needed to do it now, before it was too late… Maybe it already was too late. Maybe someone already found her. I took my jacket and headed for the door. Just before I was about to go through it I shot one last glance at the boy. He had been watching me with a mixture of fear and curiosity, but quickly looked down as I met his eyes. Could I leave him here alone for so long?

He hadn't tried anything yet. All he had done so far was crying and by the looks of it, it seemed that he would continue to do that… I never seen him or anyone else for that matter so broken before, it's like his fighting spirit was gone. Deciding that I probably didn't need to worry, I stepped outside.

"I'll be back soon." I said to him before shutting and locking the door.

I took a glance through the rear view mirror, making sure that we were not being followed. My mission to find the girl had failed, since my house had practically been swarming with cops, leaving me no other choice than to turn around and flee, hoping that no one had spotted me.

I turned the car off the road and followed the path up to the cabin. It had taken longer time than usual to get back as I had had to take quite a long detour to trick any possible followers. I had also stopped on the way to buy some antiseptic and disinfecting substances to care for the boy's injured arm.

As I drove through the woods I couldn't stop thinking about the blond fourteen year old.

"Alan" I said breaking the silence. "You've gotta tell me where the girl is." I really needed to know that.

"She's not back at the house if that's what you're worried about." He answered casually. I was about to ask him another question when I saw something or someone moving between the trees. I quickly turned my head to the right as I slowed down the car. There was nothing out of the ordinary; still I was positive that I had seen something. Could it possibly be someone spying on me… Convincing myself that I probably just imagined it I continued, although I couldn't wipe the thought of being followed, away completely.

Once at the cabin I brought the things that I'd bought out of the car, wondering briefly if the boy would let me touch him long enough to clean his wounds. The last image I had of him curled up next to the bed almost not daring to even look at me, made me figure that he would most likely be too scared to put up a fight against it.

I unlocked the door and stepped in. The first thing that I noticed was that it was unusually cold inside. Confused I eyed the window on the wall behind the table. It was completely shattered, small pieces of glass covering most of the floor and the table beneath it, causing them to glitter. Panicking my gaze flickered to the now empty floor next to the bed. Dropping the bag of medical supplies I was holding, I felt my stomach turn as I realized; the boy was gone.

"Oh no…" I mumbled, frantically searching the room with my eyes, even though I knew it was no use. "What to do…what to do?" My heart was speeding up as I stood there, not being able to think straight.

"I'll take care of this, Mark" Alan reassured. "Just relax and leave it to me. I'll bring him back again for you and make sure this doesn't happen again. I promise."

For once I appreciated Alan's help and I slowly let myself fall into my own personal sanctuary…

That's all for now... Hope you liked it.

Please don't forget to review:) There will be a sneak peek of the next chapter for you if you do:)

/MJ